Key of Knowledge
Page 22
“All the way back to New York?”
His mouth thinned as he took one of the bottles out of her hands. “No.”
Maybe it was unfair to poke and prod at him. But what the hell did she care about fair when it came to Jordan? “I wouldn’t feel safer at Flynn’s—with or without you around. In spite of my condition when you knocked on the door, I can take care of myself. I did take care of myself. I got out of it without your help. And nobody, not you, not that bastard Kane, is going to run me out of my own apartment.”
“Well.” He took a sip of beer. “I see you’ve moved to the pissed-off stage of tonight’s entertainment.”
“I don’t like being manipulated. He used my own thoughts against me, and you’re using old feelings. We cared about each other?” she shot out. “Maybe we did, but remember, that’s past tense. If you want to be such a nice guy and get out of my way, then get out of it now. You’re crowding me.”
“I’ve got things to say to you, and if I’ve got to block you in to get you to hear them, then that’s the way it is. I didn’t know you loved me. I don’t know what it would have changed, I just know it would’ve changed . . . something. Just like I know I wasn’t ready for it. I wasn’t smart enough or steady enough.”
“You were smart and steady enough to do what you wanted.”
“That’s exactly right.” With his eyes locked on hers, he nodded. “I was self-absorbed, broody, and restless. What the hell did you want with me, anyway?”
“You idiot.” Because she’d lost her taste for it, she set the beer aside. “You’ve just described the sort of guy every girl falls for at least once. Then you add those whiffs of recklessness, the brain, the looks, and the chemistry, and I didn’t have a chance. How can you make a living writing about people when you don’t understand half of them?”
When she tried to push past him, he took her arm. The look she sent him could have melted steel. “Buy a clue, Hawke. I said girls fall for once. Girls generally evolve into smart and steady women who put away the childish things like self-absorbed ass**les.”
“That’s good. I prefer women.” He put his beer on the counter. “I’ve always preferred you.”
“Do you think that makes my heart go pitty-pat?”
“Not yours, Stretch. But this might.”
He caught her face in his free hand, allowed himself the perverse pleasure of seeing her fury leap out of her eyes, then covered her mouth with his.
Thank God, he thought, thank God she was angry enough that he could do what he hadn’t been able to do when she was pale and shaken.
There’d never been a taste he’d craved the way he craved Dana’s. He had never understood it. And never worried that he should. It simply was. She might rake him to the bone for it, but he had a point to prove. To both of them.
He wasn’t gentle. She’d never seemed to expect or need gentleness from him. He simply pressed her back to the wall and took.
Heat flooded her, as enervating and nearly as terrifying as the cold she’d experienced earlier. There was no point in lying to herself, she wanted to feel this involved again, this aware of self, this needy.
But lying to him was a different matter entirely, so she shoved at him, struggled with herself, and refused to yield to either.
He laid a hand on her heart, and with his mouth only a breath from hers now, stared into her eyes. “Yeah. That got it going.”
“Get this. It’s not going to happen. It’s never going to happen again.”
“Somebody once said, ‘What’s past is prologue.’ ”
“Shakespeare, you ignorant jerk. The Tempest.”
“Right.” Amused admiration flickered over his face. “You were always better at remembering that stuff than I was. But, in any case, I’m not looking to repeat myself. However much we’re the same, we’re that much different. We’re not the same people we were, Dana. I want a chance to see who we would be together now.”
“I’m not interested.”
“Sure you are. You’ve got a curious mind, and you’re wondering, the same as I am. But maybe you’re afraid that being around me will prove too much for your self-control.”
“Please. You arrogant pig.”
“Well, then, why don’t we test your self-control and satisfy my curiosity, and have ourselves a date?”
He’d managed to throw her off. “A what?”
“You remember what a date is, Dane. Two people going out to a prearranged location.” Idly, he ran the lapel of her robe between his thumb and forefinger. “Oh, I see, you thought I meant we’d just jump straight into bed, rock and roll. Okay, if that’s the way you want it—”
“Stop it.” Baffled, annoyed, and more than half amused, she elbowed him aside. “I was not thinking about sex.” And because that was a complete lie, her tone was aloof. “There’s not going to be any rock and roll, as you so succinctly put it. And the idea of a date is just ludicrous.”
“Why? You’d get a free meal out of it. And the added pleasure of being able to shut me down when I put the moves on you, and send me home sexually frustrated.”
“That does have some appeal.”
“Saturday night. I’ll pick you up at seven-thirty.”
“How do you know I don’t already have a date for Saturday night?”
He grinned at her. “I asked Flynn if you were seeing anybody. I know how to do my research, Stretch.”
“Flynn doesn’t know everything,” she retorted as Jordan strolled away. “Wait just a damn minute.” She rushed out into the living room, caught up with him at the door. “There are some basic requirements. The meal’s in an actual restaurant. No fast food, and not the Main Street Diner. And when you say you’ll pick me up at seven-thirty, that doesn’t mean you get here at seven-forty-five.”
“Agreed.” He paused. “I know there’s no point in asking if you want me to stay, bunk on the couch. But you could call Malory, and I could hang out until she got here.”
“I’m okay.”
“You always were, Stretch. See you.”
Thoughtfully, she locked the door behind him before wandering back to the kitchen to pour the warm beer down the sink. It seemed to be her night to waste beer.
His mouth thinned as he took one of the bottles out of her hands. “No.”
Maybe it was unfair to poke and prod at him. But what the hell did she care about fair when it came to Jordan? “I wouldn’t feel safer at Flynn’s—with or without you around. In spite of my condition when you knocked on the door, I can take care of myself. I did take care of myself. I got out of it without your help. And nobody, not you, not that bastard Kane, is going to run me out of my own apartment.”
“Well.” He took a sip of beer. “I see you’ve moved to the pissed-off stage of tonight’s entertainment.”
“I don’t like being manipulated. He used my own thoughts against me, and you’re using old feelings. We cared about each other?” she shot out. “Maybe we did, but remember, that’s past tense. If you want to be such a nice guy and get out of my way, then get out of it now. You’re crowding me.”
“I’ve got things to say to you, and if I’ve got to block you in to get you to hear them, then that’s the way it is. I didn’t know you loved me. I don’t know what it would have changed, I just know it would’ve changed . . . something. Just like I know I wasn’t ready for it. I wasn’t smart enough or steady enough.”
“You were smart and steady enough to do what you wanted.”
“That’s exactly right.” With his eyes locked on hers, he nodded. “I was self-absorbed, broody, and restless. What the hell did you want with me, anyway?”
“You idiot.” Because she’d lost her taste for it, she set the beer aside. “You’ve just described the sort of guy every girl falls for at least once. Then you add those whiffs of recklessness, the brain, the looks, and the chemistry, and I didn’t have a chance. How can you make a living writing about people when you don’t understand half of them?”
When she tried to push past him, he took her arm. The look she sent him could have melted steel. “Buy a clue, Hawke. I said girls fall for once. Girls generally evolve into smart and steady women who put away the childish things like self-absorbed ass**les.”
“That’s good. I prefer women.” He put his beer on the counter. “I’ve always preferred you.”
“Do you think that makes my heart go pitty-pat?”
“Not yours, Stretch. But this might.”
He caught her face in his free hand, allowed himself the perverse pleasure of seeing her fury leap out of her eyes, then covered her mouth with his.
Thank God, he thought, thank God she was angry enough that he could do what he hadn’t been able to do when she was pale and shaken.
There’d never been a taste he’d craved the way he craved Dana’s. He had never understood it. And never worried that he should. It simply was. She might rake him to the bone for it, but he had a point to prove. To both of them.
He wasn’t gentle. She’d never seemed to expect or need gentleness from him. He simply pressed her back to the wall and took.
Heat flooded her, as enervating and nearly as terrifying as the cold she’d experienced earlier. There was no point in lying to herself, she wanted to feel this involved again, this aware of self, this needy.
But lying to him was a different matter entirely, so she shoved at him, struggled with herself, and refused to yield to either.
He laid a hand on her heart, and with his mouth only a breath from hers now, stared into her eyes. “Yeah. That got it going.”
“Get this. It’s not going to happen. It’s never going to happen again.”
“Somebody once said, ‘What’s past is prologue.’ ”
“Shakespeare, you ignorant jerk. The Tempest.”
“Right.” Amused admiration flickered over his face. “You were always better at remembering that stuff than I was. But, in any case, I’m not looking to repeat myself. However much we’re the same, we’re that much different. We’re not the same people we were, Dana. I want a chance to see who we would be together now.”
“I’m not interested.”
“Sure you are. You’ve got a curious mind, and you’re wondering, the same as I am. But maybe you’re afraid that being around me will prove too much for your self-control.”
“Please. You arrogant pig.”
“Well, then, why don’t we test your self-control and satisfy my curiosity, and have ourselves a date?”
He’d managed to throw her off. “A what?”
“You remember what a date is, Dane. Two people going out to a prearranged location.” Idly, he ran the lapel of her robe between his thumb and forefinger. “Oh, I see, you thought I meant we’d just jump straight into bed, rock and roll. Okay, if that’s the way you want it—”
“Stop it.” Baffled, annoyed, and more than half amused, she elbowed him aside. “I was not thinking about sex.” And because that was a complete lie, her tone was aloof. “There’s not going to be any rock and roll, as you so succinctly put it. And the idea of a date is just ludicrous.”
“Why? You’d get a free meal out of it. And the added pleasure of being able to shut me down when I put the moves on you, and send me home sexually frustrated.”
“That does have some appeal.”
“Saturday night. I’ll pick you up at seven-thirty.”
“How do you know I don’t already have a date for Saturday night?”
He grinned at her. “I asked Flynn if you were seeing anybody. I know how to do my research, Stretch.”
“Flynn doesn’t know everything,” she retorted as Jordan strolled away. “Wait just a damn minute.” She rushed out into the living room, caught up with him at the door. “There are some basic requirements. The meal’s in an actual restaurant. No fast food, and not the Main Street Diner. And when you say you’ll pick me up at seven-thirty, that doesn’t mean you get here at seven-forty-five.”
“Agreed.” He paused. “I know there’s no point in asking if you want me to stay, bunk on the couch. But you could call Malory, and I could hang out until she got here.”
“I’m okay.”
“You always were, Stretch. See you.”
Thoughtfully, she locked the door behind him before wandering back to the kitchen to pour the warm beer down the sink. It seemed to be her night to waste beer.
