Kick, Push
Page 25
“It’s a free world,” he says, smirking as he looks her up and down.
Becca stands in front of me when I take a step forward. “Please,” she says, her eyes pleading and filling with tears. “Just don’t.” She rises to her toes, her hands on my shoulders, and kisses me until my anger fades.
“Okay, I get it,” Brad says, but still—we don’t pull apart.
He sighs and starts to actually do his job, the entire time, my lips don’t leave hers and I know it’s just going to add to my frustration but her kisses, her touch—they’re like my drug… and I can’t quit.
Once the truck’s unloaded and the asshole’s left, Chazarae and Becca take Tommy with them to run errands and go shopping while I work alone in the yard. Alone with me, myself, and my thoughts—and sometimes, that can be a deadly combination.
I knew I’d lost it—which is something I rarely do. And it wasn’t just because that dick was looking at her the way he was. It’s because deep down, I knew he could’ve had her. And he would’ve been better for her than I was. Everyone would be better for her. At least they could actually do things without being weighed down by a kid. They could date, properly. They could get intimate without worrying about being interrupted. They could have the freedom to enjoy each other, fall in love even… without all the extra baggage. And these are the thoughts that make me question everything to do with Becca. That and the fact I still don’t know anything about her. Not really. But like I said, I’m addicted to her. To every single thing about her. And even though I know it’s bad, it feels so damn good.
These thoughts still plague my mind hours later when they all return. “Hey,” Becca says, beaming up at me. Her smile falters when I don’t return it. She walks toward me, her head tilted as if assessing me. “You okay?”
“Yeah,” I lie, leaning against my truck and wiping the sweat off my face with the bottom of my shirt. “What did you guys get up to?”
Her smile returns. “Grams got me a new printer! I’ve only got this little portable one and she bought me this one that does all these things and I’m going to play with it all weekend!”
The excitement in her voice is reason enough for my mood to switch. With a chuckle, I link my fingers with hers and just stare at how fricken’ perfect she is.
“What?” she asks, her smile wide.
“You’re such a cutie when you get excited.”
“I’ve never had anything like this before. Not for myself.”
My smile widens with every word she speaks. “I don’t think I’ve ever heard you this excited before. Ever.”
She shrugs and looks down, her cheeks darkening. “It’s a big deal for me.”
“I know,” I tell her. “I love it—seeing you like this.”
“It’s big,” she says, spreading her arms out as wide as they can go. “And it’s in the trunk. Can you get it and haul it up to my room? Please?”
“Sure.”
The second I release her hand and take a step away she smacks my ass. “Thank you.”
“How the fuck old is your computer?” I ask, looking down at it while I set up the printer on her desk. “Not that old. It was like, three years old when it was given to me.”
“How long ago?”
She shrugs. “Four years ago.”
“And it still does what you need? I mean, you have to run some pretty heavy stuff on there for your photos, right?”
“It’s not so bad. It’s better than not having one at all.”
“I’ll be back.”
“Where are you going?”
“Just wait here.”
I return a minute later with my laptop—one I was conned into buying. Well, not so much conned, but the guy at the store talked it up so much that I was convinced I needed all the pixels and aspect ratios and graphics—whatever the hell they meant. One thing led to another and the next thing I knew I was handing him my credit card.
I’ve used it twice.
“Here.” I dump the laptop and charger on her desk.
“What’s this?”
“It’s my computer. It’s a year old and I don’t use it. Like, at all. You can borrow it.”
“Josh, this is MacBook Pro.”
“See, at least you know what it is.”
“I can’t—”
“You will.” I sit down on her desk chair and switch it on. “I’ll just change my password and get rid of any and all incriminating evidence.”
She laughs just as Chazarae calls out, “Becca!”
“Becca!” Tommy repeats.
“Oh no.” I sigh. “Has he been playing echo with you guys all day?”
She shrugs. “I don’t know. Has he been playing echo with you guys all day?”
“I’m sorry,” I laugh out. “But it’s your fault. You taught him about echo.”
“You taught him about echo.”
“That’s so annoying.”
She giggles. “That’s so annoying.” Then she tilts my head up from behind me and plants a kiss on my nose. “I’ll be back,” she says, before practically skipping out of her room. Her steps thud, fast and free, down the stairs and regardless of how I felt no more than fifteen minutes ago, I realize I’m happy. She makes me happy. Especially this side of her. Because with Becca—there are two sides. And I’m pretty sure I’m in love with both.
The front door slams shut and I hear Tommy’s voice, but he’s outside and a minute later, I hear Chaz’s car start.
I hit the right keys, change the passwords and delete my porn just as Becca walks in with two cans of soda and, going by the look on her face, she knows exactly what I’ve been doing. “Porn?” she whispers.
“Pshh! I barely know how to use this thing let alone download porn on it.”
She smirks, setting the cans on the desk before pushing me back in the chair and sitting down on my lap. She scoots back until her ass is pressed up against my stomach, then takes my hand and places it on her bare legs. I rest my chin on her shoulder and try to fight off the excitement stirring in my dick. “Where’s your grams?” I ask, kissing her neck while her index finger moves the curser to a trash icon on the laptop screen. She clicks it twice, and the first thing that pops up is a folder titled Porn.
“You’re supposed to empty the trash if you want to hide things from me.”
I chuckle lightly and drop my forehead to her shoulder. “Shut up.”
Her fingers comb through the back of my head as she shifts on my lap. I hold my breath, my hands moving higher on her legs, taking the hem of her dress with them. “The store forgot to give us the paper we bought so Grams has taken Tommy with her to get it. She said she might take him to a park after,” she says.
I swallow loudly. “So… we’re alone?”
She tilts her head to the side, inviting me. I kiss her—my hands drifting higher on her leg. “What were you doing anyway?” she asks.
“I’m just loading the drivers for the printer.”
“Mmm. Keep talking nerdy to me.”
Becca stands in front of me when I take a step forward. “Please,” she says, her eyes pleading and filling with tears. “Just don’t.” She rises to her toes, her hands on my shoulders, and kisses me until my anger fades.
“Okay, I get it,” Brad says, but still—we don’t pull apart.
He sighs and starts to actually do his job, the entire time, my lips don’t leave hers and I know it’s just going to add to my frustration but her kisses, her touch—they’re like my drug… and I can’t quit.
Once the truck’s unloaded and the asshole’s left, Chazarae and Becca take Tommy with them to run errands and go shopping while I work alone in the yard. Alone with me, myself, and my thoughts—and sometimes, that can be a deadly combination.
I knew I’d lost it—which is something I rarely do. And it wasn’t just because that dick was looking at her the way he was. It’s because deep down, I knew he could’ve had her. And he would’ve been better for her than I was. Everyone would be better for her. At least they could actually do things without being weighed down by a kid. They could date, properly. They could get intimate without worrying about being interrupted. They could have the freedom to enjoy each other, fall in love even… without all the extra baggage. And these are the thoughts that make me question everything to do with Becca. That and the fact I still don’t know anything about her. Not really. But like I said, I’m addicted to her. To every single thing about her. And even though I know it’s bad, it feels so damn good.
These thoughts still plague my mind hours later when they all return. “Hey,” Becca says, beaming up at me. Her smile falters when I don’t return it. She walks toward me, her head tilted as if assessing me. “You okay?”
“Yeah,” I lie, leaning against my truck and wiping the sweat off my face with the bottom of my shirt. “What did you guys get up to?”
Her smile returns. “Grams got me a new printer! I’ve only got this little portable one and she bought me this one that does all these things and I’m going to play with it all weekend!”
The excitement in her voice is reason enough for my mood to switch. With a chuckle, I link my fingers with hers and just stare at how fricken’ perfect she is.
“What?” she asks, her smile wide.
“You’re such a cutie when you get excited.”
“I’ve never had anything like this before. Not for myself.”
My smile widens with every word she speaks. “I don’t think I’ve ever heard you this excited before. Ever.”
She shrugs and looks down, her cheeks darkening. “It’s a big deal for me.”
“I know,” I tell her. “I love it—seeing you like this.”
“It’s big,” she says, spreading her arms out as wide as they can go. “And it’s in the trunk. Can you get it and haul it up to my room? Please?”
“Sure.”
The second I release her hand and take a step away she smacks my ass. “Thank you.”
“How the fuck old is your computer?” I ask, looking down at it while I set up the printer on her desk. “Not that old. It was like, three years old when it was given to me.”
“How long ago?”
She shrugs. “Four years ago.”
“And it still does what you need? I mean, you have to run some pretty heavy stuff on there for your photos, right?”
“It’s not so bad. It’s better than not having one at all.”
“I’ll be back.”
“Where are you going?”
“Just wait here.”
I return a minute later with my laptop—one I was conned into buying. Well, not so much conned, but the guy at the store talked it up so much that I was convinced I needed all the pixels and aspect ratios and graphics—whatever the hell they meant. One thing led to another and the next thing I knew I was handing him my credit card.
I’ve used it twice.
“Here.” I dump the laptop and charger on her desk.
“What’s this?”
“It’s my computer. It’s a year old and I don’t use it. Like, at all. You can borrow it.”
“Josh, this is MacBook Pro.”
“See, at least you know what it is.”
“I can’t—”
“You will.” I sit down on her desk chair and switch it on. “I’ll just change my password and get rid of any and all incriminating evidence.”
She laughs just as Chazarae calls out, “Becca!”
“Becca!” Tommy repeats.
“Oh no.” I sigh. “Has he been playing echo with you guys all day?”
She shrugs. “I don’t know. Has he been playing echo with you guys all day?”
“I’m sorry,” I laugh out. “But it’s your fault. You taught him about echo.”
“You taught him about echo.”
“That’s so annoying.”
She giggles. “That’s so annoying.” Then she tilts my head up from behind me and plants a kiss on my nose. “I’ll be back,” she says, before practically skipping out of her room. Her steps thud, fast and free, down the stairs and regardless of how I felt no more than fifteen minutes ago, I realize I’m happy. She makes me happy. Especially this side of her. Because with Becca—there are two sides. And I’m pretty sure I’m in love with both.
The front door slams shut and I hear Tommy’s voice, but he’s outside and a minute later, I hear Chaz’s car start.
I hit the right keys, change the passwords and delete my porn just as Becca walks in with two cans of soda and, going by the look on her face, she knows exactly what I’ve been doing. “Porn?” she whispers.
“Pshh! I barely know how to use this thing let alone download porn on it.”
She smirks, setting the cans on the desk before pushing me back in the chair and sitting down on my lap. She scoots back until her ass is pressed up against my stomach, then takes my hand and places it on her bare legs. I rest my chin on her shoulder and try to fight off the excitement stirring in my dick. “Where’s your grams?” I ask, kissing her neck while her index finger moves the curser to a trash icon on the laptop screen. She clicks it twice, and the first thing that pops up is a folder titled Porn.
“You’re supposed to empty the trash if you want to hide things from me.”
I chuckle lightly and drop my forehead to her shoulder. “Shut up.”
Her fingers comb through the back of my head as she shifts on my lap. I hold my breath, my hands moving higher on her legs, taking the hem of her dress with them. “The store forgot to give us the paper we bought so Grams has taken Tommy with her to get it. She said she might take him to a park after,” she says.
I swallow loudly. “So… we’re alone?”
She tilts her head to the side, inviting me. I kiss her—my hands drifting higher on her leg. “What were you doing anyway?” she asks.
“I’m just loading the drivers for the printer.”
“Mmm. Keep talking nerdy to me.”
