Kindled

Page 5

Of its own volition, her hand rose to meet his. Time seemed to slow as they stretched across the short expanse that separated their bodies. It would be better, everything would be better once she touched him again. She knew that without a doubt, knew that he was everything she needed, and more.
And then their fingers met. Relief poured through her, tears clogged her throat. Everything was right now, everything was normal and good. He would keep her safe; he would protect her from the hurts and wrongs of the world. Wonder filled her as she searched his gaze; the vast amount of love in his eyes shook her to the core. His fingers tightened around hers as he tugged her closer to him.
Desire, love, and hunger poured from him. The hope in his eyes, the fierce force of his longing filled her completely. She knew how he felt, because she felt it too. She needed him in order to be whole, needed him to complete her. A desperate choking sound escaped her. It sounded so forlorn and frantic, even to her ears.
“Cassie,” he whispered.
She shuddered; her shoulders shook forcefully, tremors wracked painfully through her. Helplessness filled his eyes; he pulled her forward another step, reaching for her with his other hand. She almost went to him, almost buried herself against him. Almost lost herself to him completely. And then the hard facts of reality descended over her with the force of a tsunami, leaving her breathless and lost.
His gaze became desperate, worried. “Cassie, no.”
She released his hand and took a swift step back. Her gaze focused on the house across the street. She couldn’t look at him, not anymore. If she did then she would forget everything. If she did, then she would lose complete control of herself and become a blubbering mess on the sidewalk. If she did, she would not be able to extract her revenge on Isla and Julian, because she could not know hatred and anger in Devon’s arms. She could only know love and belonging.
Sighing heavily he shoved his hands into the pockets of his coat. “Where are you going?” he asked softly.
“Home.”
“You can’t walk home alone.”
She shot him a dark look, trying hard to regain the anger that had been keeping her going for the past week. “I’m perfectly capable of taking care of myself,” she informed him coldly.
“You shouldn’t be out alone. Let me take you home.”
She shook her head, trying hard to keep her tears bottled up inside. “No.”
“Cassie, I am not going to let you walk home alone. Either let me take you home, or I’m going to follow you the whole way.”
She glanced at the car sitting by the curb, purring softly. “I thought you would be with Marcy, or maybe Kara.”
He winced, his hands clenched in the pockets of his coat. “Cassie…”
“You have to leave me alone Devon. I can’t be near you anymore.”
“Cassie please…”
She lifted her gaze back to his. Drawing on her strength, she managed to retreat back behind the wall of rage that had been keeping her going. Chris’s Mustang screeched to a halt behind Devon’s car, its headlights reflected off of Devon’s taillights. He opened the door and climbed out but he didn’t approach them as he rested his hand on the roof. Standing in the wash of light, Chris’s sandy hair was highlighted with streaks of red; his eyes were bright with expectation.
She turned slowly back to Devon, hating the hurt and wounded look in his eyes, but knowing that she could not ease it. “Leave me alone.”
Her voice was harsh, cold. It was alien even to her. Taking a deep breath, she forced herself to move away from him, forced herself to walk toward Chris’s car. Chris’s shoulders sagged, his head bowed slightly. She could feel Devon’s gaze boring into her back as she reached the passenger side door. Chris lifted his head as he glanced toward Devon. Cassie stiffened, her eyes narrowing as she took in the silent communication that passed between them. Turning back to Devon, she frowned fiercely as she realized that although she was no longer with Devon, the two of them still talked with each other. And she was fairly certain that their main topic was probably her.
She glared at Chris. “Traitor,” she hissed, flinging the door open.
Chris’s eyes widened, he looked slightly chagrined before he ducked back inside the car. Cassie fought the urge not to look at Devon again, but against her will her eyes were drawn back to him. Her heart turned over as she found him still watching her intently. Hurt and longing radiated from him. Unable to move, Cassie stared back at him, her heart flipping as want filled her. For a moment she wished that things could be different, unfortunately they couldn’t.
Turning away, she slid into the passenger seat and closed the door behind her. Chris hesitated briefly before sliding the car into gear. “Are you ok?” he asked softly before pulling away from the curb.
“Fine,” she mumbled, keeping her head down as they left Devon behind.
CHAPTER 4
Cassie crossed her legs, folding her arms firmly over her chest as she leaned against the large oak behind her. She kept all of her senses honed on the night around her, searching for something, anything, in the dark. Well, anything other than Devon, who she knew was lurking in the woods at the edge of the cemetery. She resented his presence, but there was nothing that she could do to stop him from being there.
He would not leave, and she was certain that Julian and Isla would not make an appearance with him there. Frustration and anger boiled through her. She just wanted all of this to be over, but she wasn’t even going to have the chance to start it. Not as long as Devon, Chris, Melissa, and Dani hovered around her like nervous mother hens.
And with the way that one of them was constantly with her, she wouldn’t have an opportunity to escape any time soon. She wanted to smash her fist into something, instead she settled for clenching her hands so tightly that her fingernails dug painfully into her palms. “How long do you want to stay out here for?” Chris asked softly.
Cassie turned slowly toward him, trying hard to keep a tight rein on her temper. She didn’t want them to see how aggravated she was by their presence, and Devon’s. They had to think that she was ok with this; they had to believe that they could start leaving her alone. Because if they didn’t start to leave her alone, she was going to go freaking crazy. Because if they didn’t, then she would never get her chance to go after Isla and Julian, she would never get her chance to exact her revenge.
“Not much longer,” she answered absently.
Chris continued to study her for a moment longer before turning away. Cassie watched the woods impassively, taking note of the few creatures that stirred within its shadowy depths. If the animals were about then Julian and Isla were not. Unclenching her hands, she reached down to stroke her fingers over the stake she had in the waistband of her jeans. It did little to reassure her as she knew she would not be using it tonight.
Dani shivered, huddling deeper into her thick winter coat as the wind howled over the open expanse of the cemetery. Cassie sighed heavily, stepping away from the tree as pity finally sank in past the hard shell surrounding her. “Let’s go,” she mumbled.
Dani breathed a sigh of relief as she scurried swiftly to her feet. Chris and Melissa looked just as relieved as they hurried to join her. Cassie turned on her heel, not truly acknowledging their presence’s as she made her way swiftly over the snow covered landscape. The snow crunched beneath her boots, but it was hard enough now that she didn’t sink into it.
She was aggravated and frustrated that Julian and Isla had not made an appearance. She needed to draw them out, she needed to get free of her friends, and her guard dog somehow. Cassie glanced at the woods. Though she could not see Devon, she knew that he was out there, keeping pace with them, watching over her.
Anger blazed through her. She turned stiffly away from the woods, not wanting to acknowledge him in any way. She knew that ignoring him would not make him go away, but she didn’t know what else to do. She didn’t know how to make him leave. There was nothing more that she could say, or do, to make him understand that the best thing for both of them was to be apart.
The best thing for her was to get this over with so she could be free of the misery and rage consuming her.
“Cassie?” She turned slowly toward Chris, feeling stiff and wooden. “Are you ok?”
She frowned, nodding as she realized that she had stopped walking. “Fine,” she muttered.
Shoving her hands in her pockets, she kept her head bowed as she hurried toward Chris’s car. She climbed silently inside, her hand twitching back to the stake at her side. She watched unseeingly out the window as Chris made his way swiftly through the cemetery, the center of town, and eventually to her house.
She stared at the quiet house, allowing herself a moment to grieve for the warmth and happiness that used to enshroud the structure. It had none of that now. Now it was cold, lonely, a place that she hated, and that now only served as a constant reminder of all of her mistakes, and all of her failings. And there were so very many of them.
She had failed miserably in all she had set out to do, and her grandmother had been the one to pay for those mistakes.
Cassie shuddered as she slipped from the car, not looking up as she made her way to the door. Flinging the door open, she barely felt the heat on her chilled skin as she flipped on the lights. “How about some food?” Melissa inquired softly.
“Not hungry.”
Cassie tossed her coat into the hall closet and kicked off her boots. She felt drained, exhausted, completely beat, but she knew that she would not get any sleep tonight. She never slept anymore, nightmares plagued her continuously. She moved slowly into the living room and plopped down on the couch. She turned the TV on, but she didn’t watch it as she stared unseeingly at the flashing screen, not absorbing the scenes or sounds.
Chris sat stiffly beside her, folding his hands before him as he leaned his elbows on his knees. “Are you sure you don’t want some food?”
She nodded, absently flipping through the channels, though she was not looking for anything. She had nothing to look for anymore. Nothing to see. She was nothing now.
Cassie curled her legs underneath her and rested her head on the throw pillow. She remained unmoving, barely breathing as crashing waves of rage and absolute misery washed through her. She felt like a wildly swinging pendulum of emotions and she hated it. She wanted off of the rollercoaster that was her life now.
She didn’t know how much longer she could take all of this. She was rapidly falling apart and there was nothing that she could do to stop it. She had to find Julian and Isla soon. She knew that if she could just make them pay for what they had done to her grandmother than everything would be better. Revenge had to make her feel better, mainly because she knew she would not survive the battle, but it would be worth it just to make them pay.
She had to find them soon though, because she was fairly certain that she was not going to survive this agony for much longer. She wasn’t even sure how her body was still running with very little sleep and almost no food, but it would only be a matter of time before it shut down. She just had to find Julian and Isla before she shut down completely, or snapped and lost it.
***
Devon watched from the shadows as Cassie slipped through the halls. She had taken to wearing black sweaters, and hoodies, in an attempt to keep herself hidden from the world. Though she may not draw as much attention from her fellow classmates as she used to, he couldn’t fail to notice her. No matter how hard she tried to make herself invisible, he would always be able to see her.
She kept her head bowed, her golden hair spilled out from under the hood she had pulled over her head. The habitual dark glasses she now wore were firmly in place again, blocking out the startling beauty of her violet blue eyes. Beneath the dark hood her skin was pale; the normal rosiness of her cheeks was gone.
She had lost weight; her clothes were baggy on her, her face thinner. She was lean with an athletic grace, but with the weight loss the muscles in her arms stood out even more, and the bones in her hands were clearly visible as she clutched her books tight to her chest. Her face had thinned out considerably. She had always been beautiful, shockingly so, and she still was but it was a more refined beauty. She appeared older, more mature, as the youthful chubbiness of her cheeks had faded away to reveal the elegant planes of her delicate features.
She didn’t look at anyone as she slid into the girl’s locker room. Moving like a wraith, she obviously didn’t want to be noticed as she disappeared around a corner. “What’s with the sunglasses?” Devon inquired, turning as Chris appeared at his side and leaned against the locker next to Devon.
“She says the light hurts her eyes now.”
Devon glanced at the harsh fluorescents. They were bright against his eyes, but he’d had a lot of practice with adjusting his sensitive vision to them. “You don’t believe her?”