Kitty and the Silver Bullet
Page 48
"Yeah, I know."
Ben put his hand on my thigh—a touch of comfort. I hadn't realized how tense I was until I twitched at the pressure. But his touch transmitted calm. Stay calm. This'll work.
We arrived all too quickly. Quicker than I thought we would. No traffic at 2:00 a.m. Maybe that was it.
"We can still change our minds," I said after I shut the engine off.
"You're the alpha," Ben said. "Isn't that what you keep saying? It's not up to us."
"Ben—" It came out as a whine.
"Are you guys married?" Shaun said. "'Cause you sound married."
I leaned my forehead on the steering wheel and groaned. "How did my life turn into this?" I didn't even want to see how Ben was taking the comment.
Shaun quickly said, "No, it's in a good way. Way better than Carl and Meg."
"What do they sound like when they argue?" I said.
"They don't argue. They don't even talk to each other. Compared to them, you guys are Ozzie and Harriet."
Ben patted my arm. "Come on, dear. When this is all over, we can go home and you can make me a martini and fetch my slippers."
We climbed out of the car. "Oh, no. I don't think so."
Ben glanced at Shaun. "See? No Ozzie and Harriet here."
Shaun shook his head, and I had a sneaking suspicion he wanted to laugh.
A ridge of hills and ravines ran north and west from here, leading up to the Flatirons, roughly marking the western edge of Carl's territory. He and his wolves ranged farther into the mountains on occasion. But the foothills and plains along this stretch were their favorite stomping grounds. Kicking the wasp nest. Yeah.
Wolf coiled inside me, like my insides were pacing even though I wasn't. For once, we agreed on something. She was as pissed off at Carl as I was. Carl was breaking trust with his wolves; he'd killed wolves under his protection. He wasn't a good alpha, and we had to do something about that.
I walked up the side of the hill, beginning the trek into wilderness. I sensed rather than saw Ben and Shaun hesitate, then follow. Even if one of them had spoken, had called to me, I didn't think I could answer. Not with human words. I was entering Wolf's world.
First thing was to find a den. I found one where stands of pine trees started growing, up in the hills near Coal Creek Canyon. Trees stood over a sheltered hollow. It couldn't be seen at all from downslope. We could stash our clothes and have a safe place to come and sleep it off. And it was relatively near the car for that fast getaway come morning.
I started stripping, pulling off my shirt. Shaun did the same. Ben watched us.
"This is weird," Ben said. "Doing this in front of a stranger. It's like having sex with the curtains open."
He didn't have any experience with a real pack, where naked wasn't sexual, it was just natural. He'd only ever Changed when it was the two of us. And yeah, curled up together the next morning, sex was usually involved. I couldn't blame him for making the connection. But I did anyway.
"Would you get your mind out of the gutter?"
"Can we trust him?" Suddenly he sounded serious. And he was right. This was war, and there were spies. I only knew Shaun as someone from my old life who didn't like Carl.
"You can trust me," Shaun said, his shirt off, his jeans unzipped, half undressed. "I trust her." He gave me that look that a subordinate gives his alpha. That focused gaze, waiting to be told what to do, when to jump.
I hadn't done anything to earn that trust. Not yet. I didn't deserve it. I hadn't been able to save Jenny. I nodded to him, all the acknowledgment I was able to give.
He finished undressing, and a sheen of sweat covered his skin. His hands were shifting already, thickening, and his back hunched. Ben saw it; he'd clenched his own hands into fists, and his hair was damp. He was close, too.
"Ben." I touched his hand, and it uncurled to grasp mine. I drew close to him. "I need you, okay? I need your help. I can't do this by myself."
"You seem to be doing just fine." His cheek brushed mine. His other hand caressed my back. God, I wanted him. I wanted to ditch this whole thing and run into the woods with him.
We kissed, and the touch was hot, tense, desperate. A last kiss before battle.
"Later," I whispered, hoping he'd been thinking the same thing. He nodded.
Nearby, Shaun gave a grunt—or what had been Shaun gave a grunt. In his place, a dark and silvery wolf shook out his fur and turned to us with gleaming eyes. His tail was low, questioning.
Ben was trembling, holding in his own wolf. I started unbuttoning his shirt. "Come on. It's time."
We got most of his clothes off before he fell, kicking on his pants as he shifted, bones melting and skin sliding, the other form bursting out of him, swallowing him. He didn't make a sound, kept it all in and just let it happen. Flowing like water was how I thought of it. His wolf was rusty gray, turning to cream on his nose and belly. The two wolves approached each other, heads low, sniffing. Ben growled and Shaun ducked, clamping his tail between his legs. That was all it took. Pack order established. Ben was alpha male. Weirdly, I was proud of him.
I looked at my two wolves. When I knelt, they came to me, rubbed against me, smelling me, and I stroked them. "Thank you for believing in me," I said, and maybe they understood and maybe they didn't. But Ben wagged his tail once.
Go go go—
And Wolf was right, I couldn't hold it any longer.
This is war.
This is battle, this is chaos, this is breaking taboos, edging into the territory of another pack. Seeking out this alien scent, letting it surround her—the nearness of danger makes all her hair stand on end, and a growl is ready to break loose in her throat.
And yet, she seeks it out, and the danger thrills her. She knows: We are stronger, we will win, we must.
She has a pack. A small one, but hers, and they follow, her mate and the other at her flanks. With their ground-eating strides—sometimes trotting, sometimes loping—they cover miles of ground on plain and hill. All the while,at junctures and borders, they mark. At the reeking places where the other pack has marked they especially linger.
There is joy in this as well, and she stops her followers to play, leaping at each other, snapping, yipping. Her mate finds a rabbit and they eat. Then they range again, mindful of the battle.
Ben put his hand on my thigh—a touch of comfort. I hadn't realized how tense I was until I twitched at the pressure. But his touch transmitted calm. Stay calm. This'll work.
We arrived all too quickly. Quicker than I thought we would. No traffic at 2:00 a.m. Maybe that was it.
"We can still change our minds," I said after I shut the engine off.
"You're the alpha," Ben said. "Isn't that what you keep saying? It's not up to us."
"Ben—" It came out as a whine.
"Are you guys married?" Shaun said. "'Cause you sound married."
I leaned my forehead on the steering wheel and groaned. "How did my life turn into this?" I didn't even want to see how Ben was taking the comment.
Shaun quickly said, "No, it's in a good way. Way better than Carl and Meg."
"What do they sound like when they argue?" I said.
"They don't argue. They don't even talk to each other. Compared to them, you guys are Ozzie and Harriet."
Ben patted my arm. "Come on, dear. When this is all over, we can go home and you can make me a martini and fetch my slippers."
We climbed out of the car. "Oh, no. I don't think so."
Ben glanced at Shaun. "See? No Ozzie and Harriet here."
Shaun shook his head, and I had a sneaking suspicion he wanted to laugh.
A ridge of hills and ravines ran north and west from here, leading up to the Flatirons, roughly marking the western edge of Carl's territory. He and his wolves ranged farther into the mountains on occasion. But the foothills and plains along this stretch were their favorite stomping grounds. Kicking the wasp nest. Yeah.
Wolf coiled inside me, like my insides were pacing even though I wasn't. For once, we agreed on something. She was as pissed off at Carl as I was. Carl was breaking trust with his wolves; he'd killed wolves under his protection. He wasn't a good alpha, and we had to do something about that.
I walked up the side of the hill, beginning the trek into wilderness. I sensed rather than saw Ben and Shaun hesitate, then follow. Even if one of them had spoken, had called to me, I didn't think I could answer. Not with human words. I was entering Wolf's world.
First thing was to find a den. I found one where stands of pine trees started growing, up in the hills near Coal Creek Canyon. Trees stood over a sheltered hollow. It couldn't be seen at all from downslope. We could stash our clothes and have a safe place to come and sleep it off. And it was relatively near the car for that fast getaway come morning.
I started stripping, pulling off my shirt. Shaun did the same. Ben watched us.
"This is weird," Ben said. "Doing this in front of a stranger. It's like having sex with the curtains open."
He didn't have any experience with a real pack, where naked wasn't sexual, it was just natural. He'd only ever Changed when it was the two of us. And yeah, curled up together the next morning, sex was usually involved. I couldn't blame him for making the connection. But I did anyway.
"Would you get your mind out of the gutter?"
"Can we trust him?" Suddenly he sounded serious. And he was right. This was war, and there were spies. I only knew Shaun as someone from my old life who didn't like Carl.
"You can trust me," Shaun said, his shirt off, his jeans unzipped, half undressed. "I trust her." He gave me that look that a subordinate gives his alpha. That focused gaze, waiting to be told what to do, when to jump.
I hadn't done anything to earn that trust. Not yet. I didn't deserve it. I hadn't been able to save Jenny. I nodded to him, all the acknowledgment I was able to give.
He finished undressing, and a sheen of sweat covered his skin. His hands were shifting already, thickening, and his back hunched. Ben saw it; he'd clenched his own hands into fists, and his hair was damp. He was close, too.
"Ben." I touched his hand, and it uncurled to grasp mine. I drew close to him. "I need you, okay? I need your help. I can't do this by myself."
"You seem to be doing just fine." His cheek brushed mine. His other hand caressed my back. God, I wanted him. I wanted to ditch this whole thing and run into the woods with him.
We kissed, and the touch was hot, tense, desperate. A last kiss before battle.
"Later," I whispered, hoping he'd been thinking the same thing. He nodded.
Nearby, Shaun gave a grunt—or what had been Shaun gave a grunt. In his place, a dark and silvery wolf shook out his fur and turned to us with gleaming eyes. His tail was low, questioning.
Ben was trembling, holding in his own wolf. I started unbuttoning his shirt. "Come on. It's time."
We got most of his clothes off before he fell, kicking on his pants as he shifted, bones melting and skin sliding, the other form bursting out of him, swallowing him. He didn't make a sound, kept it all in and just let it happen. Flowing like water was how I thought of it. His wolf was rusty gray, turning to cream on his nose and belly. The two wolves approached each other, heads low, sniffing. Ben growled and Shaun ducked, clamping his tail between his legs. That was all it took. Pack order established. Ben was alpha male. Weirdly, I was proud of him.
I looked at my two wolves. When I knelt, they came to me, rubbed against me, smelling me, and I stroked them. "Thank you for believing in me," I said, and maybe they understood and maybe they didn't. But Ben wagged his tail once.
Go go go—
And Wolf was right, I couldn't hold it any longer.
This is war.
This is battle, this is chaos, this is breaking taboos, edging into the territory of another pack. Seeking out this alien scent, letting it surround her—the nearness of danger makes all her hair stand on end, and a growl is ready to break loose in her throat.
And yet, she seeks it out, and the danger thrills her. She knows: We are stronger, we will win, we must.
She has a pack. A small one, but hers, and they follow, her mate and the other at her flanks. With their ground-eating strides—sometimes trotting, sometimes loping—they cover miles of ground on plain and hill. All the while,at junctures and borders, they mark. At the reeking places where the other pack has marked they especially linger.
There is joy in this as well, and she stops her followers to play, leaping at each other, snapping, yipping. Her mate finds a rabbit and they eat. Then they range again, mindful of the battle.
