Laid Bare
Page 64
“You didn’t fail. I just . . . I lost part of myself for a very long time. By the time I started to surface we’d fallen apart and I was different. I couldn’t love anyone anymore and I didn’t for four years. I failed. I failed her, I failed you. I failed a lot of people. But I’m working my way back to being human again. I’m happy. In love. It’s good.”
He smiled and shook his head. “Erin, you didn’t fail and I guess I didn’t either. It just wasn’t meant to be, I suppose. I want you to be happy and that you’re doing these shows just proves to me this guy is part of you coming back to live the life you were meant to. You were born to play live. I’m glad you’re doing it. I brought some contractual shit I need you to sign and then I’m going to go back home. I just had to know. I had to know if there was even a small chance for us. I can see now the truth of it.”
They hugged and she felt, for the first time in a very long time, that things were okay between them.
They went back inside and Erin tried not to smile at the way Ben scowled at Jeremy.
She signed papers and Jeremy gave her some forms showing the deposit of royalties into her account. She’d need to deal with her accountant now and she’d have to hire another part-time person to sub for Ella for the next several months at least. Erin had already assured Ella’s mother she’d pay her insurance contribution and not to worry.
There was no way Erin would simply leave Ella to sink or swim. Her music and songwriting made her very comfortable, and it wouldn’t hurt at all to continue to pay Ella a salary until she could come back. When she did come back, Erin wanted her on full-time so she could have days off.
“Okay, thanks. I’ll get you copies of all this stuff. It was good to see you.” He turned to Todd and Ben. “It was nice to meet you, Todd. Take care of her. I’ll have the security guy at the label contact you in a month or so.”
She hugged him.
“I’m just going to go now. See if I can’t get on the next flight back.”
“Stay, Jeremy. Don’t rush off on my account.” Erin didn’t want him to feel chased off or kicked out.
“I need to get back. This was a spur-of-the-moment thing and I have work to do back home. I need to call you soon anyway. I’ve received several offers I think you may be interested in.”
Adrian grabbed her wrist as she started to leave, to stay her. “I’ll walk you out, Jeremy.”
“Come on, you guys want to see the studio?” she asked Ben and Todd. Ben’s eyes lit up as he nodded.
She led them down the spiral staircase and through the doors into what she considered the heart of the house. She’d slept on the couch in the corner more times than she could count.
“Is everything all right?” Todd asked quietly.
“Yeah. It was hard for him, but he needed to see it. He’ll be all right.”
“This is amazing!” Ben looked around.
“It is, isn’t it? We’ve done the last two CDs here. There’s some postproduction stuff we’ve had to go down to LA to do a time or two, but I’d way rather record here. Once we recorded in New Orleans, which was awesome. But the studio was destroyed by Katrina. The new space is nice, I hear.”
“It’s not haunted though,” Adrian said as he joined them. “The old one was magical. I was down in the new space to do some work with Mia Long, it’s not the same. Ben, I don’t think we’ve officially met, although we’ve seen each other in passing.” Adrian offered a hand and Ben took it. “You two want to hear a track or two? Top secret and stuff?”
“No, it’s okay! They don’t need to.” Erin wasn’t sure why she was so nervous, but Todd and Ben were important to her.
“They want to.” Ben rolled his eyes. “We’d love to,” he said to Adrian, and Todd put his arm around her shoulders.
Todd listened to the tracks and fell for her all over again. Adrian did the singing—it was his CD after all—but she did backing vo cals. He recognized the lyrics, knowing she’d written them a few months back.
He hadn’t much liked the way Jeremy had looked at her, but he’d liked the way she’d looked back. Like a woman who cared about the guy but not at all the way she looked at Todd.
She blushed as she stood in his arms.
“This is amazing. This CD is going to fly off the shelves,” Ben said to Adrian. “And you, that’s some top-notch songwriting.” He had turned to Erin and she grinned.
“I totally agree. I can’t wait to hear this stuff live. The Gorge in the spring will be great,” Adrian said.
“Long as it doesn’t rain and shock me over and over. I hate that.” Adrian laughed, and Todd and Ben listened as the siblings began to trade stories about touring and recording. Todd liked their connection. Brody’s connection to her was more paternal than brotherly. He had a way of taking her in hand that would have seemed dangerous coming from anyone else. But she and Adrian were friends as well as siblings.
Adrian had voiced his concerns to Todd some weeks before. Had laid it out that Erin needed stability and a man who loved her and would protect her while understanding she didn’t need managing. He saw Todd as a man who would protect her but worried that Todd would try to control her, even if it was done for her own good.
That sort of honesty was refreshing and Todd had reassured Adrian he respected Erin as a whole person and understood she’d never allow anyone to manage her anyway.
He smiled and shook his head. “Erin, you didn’t fail and I guess I didn’t either. It just wasn’t meant to be, I suppose. I want you to be happy and that you’re doing these shows just proves to me this guy is part of you coming back to live the life you were meant to. You were born to play live. I’m glad you’re doing it. I brought some contractual shit I need you to sign and then I’m going to go back home. I just had to know. I had to know if there was even a small chance for us. I can see now the truth of it.”
They hugged and she felt, for the first time in a very long time, that things were okay between them.
They went back inside and Erin tried not to smile at the way Ben scowled at Jeremy.
She signed papers and Jeremy gave her some forms showing the deposit of royalties into her account. She’d need to deal with her accountant now and she’d have to hire another part-time person to sub for Ella for the next several months at least. Erin had already assured Ella’s mother she’d pay her insurance contribution and not to worry.
There was no way Erin would simply leave Ella to sink or swim. Her music and songwriting made her very comfortable, and it wouldn’t hurt at all to continue to pay Ella a salary until she could come back. When she did come back, Erin wanted her on full-time so she could have days off.
“Okay, thanks. I’ll get you copies of all this stuff. It was good to see you.” He turned to Todd and Ben. “It was nice to meet you, Todd. Take care of her. I’ll have the security guy at the label contact you in a month or so.”
She hugged him.
“I’m just going to go now. See if I can’t get on the next flight back.”
“Stay, Jeremy. Don’t rush off on my account.” Erin didn’t want him to feel chased off or kicked out.
“I need to get back. This was a spur-of-the-moment thing and I have work to do back home. I need to call you soon anyway. I’ve received several offers I think you may be interested in.”
Adrian grabbed her wrist as she started to leave, to stay her. “I’ll walk you out, Jeremy.”
“Come on, you guys want to see the studio?” she asked Ben and Todd. Ben’s eyes lit up as he nodded.
She led them down the spiral staircase and through the doors into what she considered the heart of the house. She’d slept on the couch in the corner more times than she could count.
“Is everything all right?” Todd asked quietly.
“Yeah. It was hard for him, but he needed to see it. He’ll be all right.”
“This is amazing!” Ben looked around.
“It is, isn’t it? We’ve done the last two CDs here. There’s some postproduction stuff we’ve had to go down to LA to do a time or two, but I’d way rather record here. Once we recorded in New Orleans, which was awesome. But the studio was destroyed by Katrina. The new space is nice, I hear.”
“It’s not haunted though,” Adrian said as he joined them. “The old one was magical. I was down in the new space to do some work with Mia Long, it’s not the same. Ben, I don’t think we’ve officially met, although we’ve seen each other in passing.” Adrian offered a hand and Ben took it. “You two want to hear a track or two? Top secret and stuff?”
“No, it’s okay! They don’t need to.” Erin wasn’t sure why she was so nervous, but Todd and Ben were important to her.
“They want to.” Ben rolled his eyes. “We’d love to,” he said to Adrian, and Todd put his arm around her shoulders.
Todd listened to the tracks and fell for her all over again. Adrian did the singing—it was his CD after all—but she did backing vo cals. He recognized the lyrics, knowing she’d written them a few months back.
He hadn’t much liked the way Jeremy had looked at her, but he’d liked the way she’d looked back. Like a woman who cared about the guy but not at all the way she looked at Todd.
She blushed as she stood in his arms.
“This is amazing. This CD is going to fly off the shelves,” Ben said to Adrian. “And you, that’s some top-notch songwriting.” He had turned to Erin and she grinned.
“I totally agree. I can’t wait to hear this stuff live. The Gorge in the spring will be great,” Adrian said.
“Long as it doesn’t rain and shock me over and over. I hate that.” Adrian laughed, and Todd and Ben listened as the siblings began to trade stories about touring and recording. Todd liked their connection. Brody’s connection to her was more paternal than brotherly. He had a way of taking her in hand that would have seemed dangerous coming from anyone else. But she and Adrian were friends as well as siblings.
Adrian had voiced his concerns to Todd some weeks before. Had laid it out that Erin needed stability and a man who loved her and would protect her while understanding she didn’t need managing. He saw Todd as a man who would protect her but worried that Todd would try to control her, even if it was done for her own good.
That sort of honesty was refreshing and Todd had reassured Adrian he respected Erin as a whole person and understood she’d never allow anyone to manage her anyway.
