Leah on the Offbeat
Page 35
I jump. “Jesus, Garrett!”
“So, guess what,” he says.
I narrow my eyes. “What?”
“I’m mad at you.”
“Why?”
He smiles and ruffles his hair. “You disappeared before the game ended. Again. Why do you always do that?”
“Because.” My mind goes blank. I mean, not blank, exactly. But it’s definitely not giving me anything useful to work with.
Because.
Because Abby kissed me. Because she may not be straight. Which means I had to update every single one of my daydreams to reflect this. We’re talking about a massive overhaul, Garrett. I don’t think you realize how many Abby-related fantasies live in this brain.
“This was the most boring spring break ever,” Garrett says. Now he’s walking beside me, matching my pace. “You should have stayed home to entertain me.”
“Entertain you?” I side-eye him.
“Well, Burke, I didn’t mean it like that,” he says, nudging me. “But now that you mention it . . .”
Then he winks at me, so—yeah. We’re done here. “I’ll see you at lunch, Garrett,” I say, patting him once on the arm before veering down a side hall.
“I made dinner reservations!” he calls after me. “For prom!”
I give him a thumbs-up over my shoulder. What a fucking slightly adorable doofus.
I haven’t talked to Abby since I stepped out of her car on Wednesday—and when I realize that, it throws me. It doesn’t feel like it’s been that long. But then again, I’ve thought about her approximately ten billion times a day.
All morning, I feel like I’m quietly buzzing. I don’t have any classes with Abby until the afternoon. But there’s lunch. At noon. In six and a half minutes. I can’t stop staring at the clock.
Bram’s already at the table when I get there, and I take a seat beside him, facing the door. It occurs to me that I have no idea whether Simon talked to him. So, that’s awkward. Hey, Bram—your boyfriend might move to Philly, and he told me first.
And then it actually hits me. Simon told me first. And if I’m being totally honest, I’m sort of gleeful about that. No one ever picks me first. But he did. I feel this sudden wave of affection for Simon. I think he might be the best friend I’ve ever had.
And maybe I should actually come out to him. Tell him I’m bi. I can picture it perfectly. I think he’ll laugh when I tell him. Not in a douchey way. I just think he’ll be happy.
“What are you smiling about?” Bram asks.
I shrug and look away.
And then I see her in the doorway. Understated Abby, goddess of restraint. Jeans and a long cardigan and glasses. I literally just spent two nights with her, and I had no idea she wore glasses. Of course she looks amazing in them.
Then she smiles at me slightly, and I can barely look at her. I literally can’t remember if I’m supposed to be mad at her. She does a come-over-here gesture, and first I whip my head around to see who she’s talking to. Yes, you, she mouths, grinning.
I get up from the table, just as Simon’s sitting down. Abby’s waiting in the hall, outside the doorway.
“Hi,” she says, smiling tentatively.
“Hey.”
“I can’t sit there.”
“Because of Nick?”
She shrugs. “It just seems mean.”
For a moment, neither of us speaks. We just stand against the wall, watching the juniors stream into the cafeteria in clusters. Abby’s foot taps on the molding, and there’s this look in her eyes that I’ve never seen before. I can’t decipher it.
“So, we really need to talk,” Abby says finally.
“You and Nick?”
“No.” She rolls her eyes, smiling. “You and me.”
My heart flips. “Okay.”
“Are you free after school this week?”
“What day?”
“Any day. Want to say Friday?” Abby pauses. “I just need to—”
But then she stops talking abruptly, leaning almost imperceptibly away from me. I look up, and there’s Garrett.
“Hey, ladies.”
The daily cringe, starring Garrett Laughlin. Today’s episode: Garrett missed the memo about not calling women ladies.
“I was just filling everyone in on dinner plans for prom. We have a six o’clock reservation at the American Grill Bistro at North Point Mall. It’s about twenty minutes from the nature center.”
“I love that prom’s at the nature center,” says Abby. “It suits us.”
“Because we’re so naturally awesome?” Garrett asks.
“Because our classmates are literally wildlife,” says Abby.
Garrett actually giggles, and I shake my head, smiling.
“Anyway, I should go,” Abby says quickly, looking from Garrett to me. “But.” She nudges my foot with her toe. “Friday afternoon. I’ll find you.” She flashes a quick smile and drifts back down the hallway. Then she turns a corner and disappears.
25
AND OF COURSE, I’M A hot mess for the rest of the day. I’m so far gone, it’s not even funny. My head is just mush. Actual mush. And it would be one thing if it only happened in Abby’s physical presence, but it’s way beyond that. It’s everything I do and everywhere I go. People try to talk to me, and I don’t even hear them.
Simon intercepts me on my way to the buses. “Come on. I’m driving you home.”
“You don’t have to do that.”
“It’s not a question. Let’s go.” He hooks his arm around my shoulders and turns me toward the parking lot. Then he walks me the whole way there, like I’m a frail, stumbling great-grandmother.
“You’re ridiculous,” I inform him.
He opens the passenger door for me.
“Are you going to click my seat belt for me, too?” I add.
“Very funny.”
“So, where’s Nora?” I ask when he finally slides into the driver’s seat.
“Funny you should ask.”
“Funny how?”
“Well, by funny,” he explains, “I mean not at all funny.”
“Ah.”
He backs slowly out of his parking spot, lips pressed together.
“Is everything okay?” I say after a moment.
“What? Oh yeah. I’m just.” He shakes his head. “Did you know she’s going to prom?”
“Nora?”
Simon nods.
“Oh. With Cal?”
He stops at a light, turning to me incredulously. “You knew about it?”
“No, but they were pretty flirty during the play.”
“No they weren’t! I would have noticed. I always notice this stuff.” I snort out loud, and he narrows his eyes. “What?”
“Nothing.”
“Hmph.”
“So, are they dating?” I ask.
He sighs. “I don’t know.”
“Want me to ask her? I’ll ask. I don’t care.”
“It’s just weird, right?” he says, nodding earnestly. “He liked me.”
“And you have a boyfriend. Which, speaking of—have you talked to Bram yet?”
“No. But I will. And, Leah, God. You know I’m not jealous, right? I’m just saying—it’s weird.”
“I don’t think it’s weird at all. You and Nora look a lot alike.”
Simon smacks the steering wheel. “That’s why it’s weird.”
“The dude has a type.”
“I don’t like it.”
“I think you just don’t like the idea of your little sister hooking up with someone.”
“THEY’RE NOT HOOKING UP.”
I shake my head, smiling.
“But she keeps staying after school with him for yearbook, and now he’s giving her a ride home like every day.”
“Aka, they’re hooking up.”
Simon huffs. “No they’re not.”
He turns onto Roswell Road, and for the next five minutes, we drive in silence. I don’t say a single word until he pulls into my driveway.
“So, guess what,” he says.
I narrow my eyes. “What?”
“I’m mad at you.”
“Why?”
He smiles and ruffles his hair. “You disappeared before the game ended. Again. Why do you always do that?”
“Because.” My mind goes blank. I mean, not blank, exactly. But it’s definitely not giving me anything useful to work with.
Because.
Because Abby kissed me. Because she may not be straight. Which means I had to update every single one of my daydreams to reflect this. We’re talking about a massive overhaul, Garrett. I don’t think you realize how many Abby-related fantasies live in this brain.
“This was the most boring spring break ever,” Garrett says. Now he’s walking beside me, matching my pace. “You should have stayed home to entertain me.”
“Entertain you?” I side-eye him.
“Well, Burke, I didn’t mean it like that,” he says, nudging me. “But now that you mention it . . .”
Then he winks at me, so—yeah. We’re done here. “I’ll see you at lunch, Garrett,” I say, patting him once on the arm before veering down a side hall.
“I made dinner reservations!” he calls after me. “For prom!”
I give him a thumbs-up over my shoulder. What a fucking slightly adorable doofus.
I haven’t talked to Abby since I stepped out of her car on Wednesday—and when I realize that, it throws me. It doesn’t feel like it’s been that long. But then again, I’ve thought about her approximately ten billion times a day.
All morning, I feel like I’m quietly buzzing. I don’t have any classes with Abby until the afternoon. But there’s lunch. At noon. In six and a half minutes. I can’t stop staring at the clock.
Bram’s already at the table when I get there, and I take a seat beside him, facing the door. It occurs to me that I have no idea whether Simon talked to him. So, that’s awkward. Hey, Bram—your boyfriend might move to Philly, and he told me first.
And then it actually hits me. Simon told me first. And if I’m being totally honest, I’m sort of gleeful about that. No one ever picks me first. But he did. I feel this sudden wave of affection for Simon. I think he might be the best friend I’ve ever had.
And maybe I should actually come out to him. Tell him I’m bi. I can picture it perfectly. I think he’ll laugh when I tell him. Not in a douchey way. I just think he’ll be happy.
“What are you smiling about?” Bram asks.
I shrug and look away.
And then I see her in the doorway. Understated Abby, goddess of restraint. Jeans and a long cardigan and glasses. I literally just spent two nights with her, and I had no idea she wore glasses. Of course she looks amazing in them.
Then she smiles at me slightly, and I can barely look at her. I literally can’t remember if I’m supposed to be mad at her. She does a come-over-here gesture, and first I whip my head around to see who she’s talking to. Yes, you, she mouths, grinning.
I get up from the table, just as Simon’s sitting down. Abby’s waiting in the hall, outside the doorway.
“Hi,” she says, smiling tentatively.
“Hey.”
“I can’t sit there.”
“Because of Nick?”
She shrugs. “It just seems mean.”
For a moment, neither of us speaks. We just stand against the wall, watching the juniors stream into the cafeteria in clusters. Abby’s foot taps on the molding, and there’s this look in her eyes that I’ve never seen before. I can’t decipher it.
“So, we really need to talk,” Abby says finally.
“You and Nick?”
“No.” She rolls her eyes, smiling. “You and me.”
My heart flips. “Okay.”
“Are you free after school this week?”
“What day?”
“Any day. Want to say Friday?” Abby pauses. “I just need to—”
But then she stops talking abruptly, leaning almost imperceptibly away from me. I look up, and there’s Garrett.
“Hey, ladies.”
The daily cringe, starring Garrett Laughlin. Today’s episode: Garrett missed the memo about not calling women ladies.
“I was just filling everyone in on dinner plans for prom. We have a six o’clock reservation at the American Grill Bistro at North Point Mall. It’s about twenty minutes from the nature center.”
“I love that prom’s at the nature center,” says Abby. “It suits us.”
“Because we’re so naturally awesome?” Garrett asks.
“Because our classmates are literally wildlife,” says Abby.
Garrett actually giggles, and I shake my head, smiling.
“Anyway, I should go,” Abby says quickly, looking from Garrett to me. “But.” She nudges my foot with her toe. “Friday afternoon. I’ll find you.” She flashes a quick smile and drifts back down the hallway. Then she turns a corner and disappears.
25
AND OF COURSE, I’M A hot mess for the rest of the day. I’m so far gone, it’s not even funny. My head is just mush. Actual mush. And it would be one thing if it only happened in Abby’s physical presence, but it’s way beyond that. It’s everything I do and everywhere I go. People try to talk to me, and I don’t even hear them.
Simon intercepts me on my way to the buses. “Come on. I’m driving you home.”
“You don’t have to do that.”
“It’s not a question. Let’s go.” He hooks his arm around my shoulders and turns me toward the parking lot. Then he walks me the whole way there, like I’m a frail, stumbling great-grandmother.
“You’re ridiculous,” I inform him.
He opens the passenger door for me.
“Are you going to click my seat belt for me, too?” I add.
“Very funny.”
“So, where’s Nora?” I ask when he finally slides into the driver’s seat.
“Funny you should ask.”
“Funny how?”
“Well, by funny,” he explains, “I mean not at all funny.”
“Ah.”
He backs slowly out of his parking spot, lips pressed together.
“Is everything okay?” I say after a moment.
“What? Oh yeah. I’m just.” He shakes his head. “Did you know she’s going to prom?”
“Nora?”
Simon nods.
“Oh. With Cal?”
He stops at a light, turning to me incredulously. “You knew about it?”
“No, but they were pretty flirty during the play.”
“No they weren’t! I would have noticed. I always notice this stuff.” I snort out loud, and he narrows his eyes. “What?”
“Nothing.”
“Hmph.”
“So, are they dating?” I ask.
He sighs. “I don’t know.”
“Want me to ask her? I’ll ask. I don’t care.”
“It’s just weird, right?” he says, nodding earnestly. “He liked me.”
“And you have a boyfriend. Which, speaking of—have you talked to Bram yet?”
“No. But I will. And, Leah, God. You know I’m not jealous, right? I’m just saying—it’s weird.”
“I don’t think it’s weird at all. You and Nora look a lot alike.”
Simon smacks the steering wheel. “That’s why it’s weird.”
“The dude has a type.”
“I don’t like it.”
“I think you just don’t like the idea of your little sister hooking up with someone.”
“THEY’RE NOT HOOKING UP.”
I shake my head, smiling.
“But she keeps staying after school with him for yearbook, and now he’s giving her a ride home like every day.”
“Aka, they’re hooking up.”
Simon huffs. “No they’re not.”
He turns onto Roswell Road, and for the next five minutes, we drive in silence. I don’t say a single word until he pulls into my driveway.
