Legally Wed
Page 21
“Not for another four weeks at least,” she answered. “I’ll be happy either way, though. This should be good practice for you two.” She winked. Hannah was no fool. She saw through our sudden interest in babysitting.
“Yeah,” I said nervously. “I don’t have any experience with kids myself and my mom was always working, so I don’t really have any good role models other than maybe some of the better babysitters.”
“I’m sure that’s exactly what she wants to hear before leaving her child in your care,” Adam said.
“I’m not worried,” Hannah said reassuringly. “If you can handle Adam you can handle Josh. And I have good instincts about people. I think you’ll be a natural, Lily. Just remember, though, we all figure it out when we need to.” Adam turned and lifted his eyebrows at me in a silent “I told you so.”
“Okay, well, you guys should get going on your romantic getaway,” I said.
“Yeah, I don’t know when we’ll get another one. Enjoy your private time while you can. Once you have kids it gets much more complicated.”
Nate took their bags out to the car and then he and Hannah said goodbye to Josh. My heart ached watching it. They would just be gone for the night, but I could see that both Hannah and Josh were trying to be brave.
She promised him that he would have fun with Uncle Adam and Aunt Lily and that Mommy and Daddy would be back the next day. Josh nodded and hugged her hard. I almost had an emotional breakdown right there in the driveway. When they left, we held little hands and went back into the house. I had a feeling it was Elmo time.
Two hours later, with the theme to Elmo’s World permanently burned into my brain, it occurred to me that it was noon and Josh was probably getting hungry.
“Josh, it’s time for lunch,” I said brightly. “How about a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and some milk?”
“I want mac and cheese please,” he said gazing up at me with huge brown eyes that looked a whole lot like Adam’s. I melted. The kid owned me.
“Well, okay, but just for lunch, not for dinner too.”
“Hang on a minute,” Adam interrupted. “Okay, you want mac and cheese you’re going to have to have some carrot sticks too.”
“I don’t want carrot sticks. Celery with peanut butter is okay.”
“Alright but then you also drink some apple juice.”
“Okay.”
“So, mac and cheese, celery sticks with peanut butter and apple juice. You’ve got a deal.” Adam walked over and shook his hand. “Now go wash up and we’ll meet you in the kitchen.” Josh marched off toward the bathroom and I turned to Adam.
“That was very impressive.”
“It’s just a matter of negotiation, Lilith. Don’t ever accept the first offer.” He came over and put his arms around me, grabbing my bottom. “So, you think this kid naps?”
“Maybe we can drug him,” I suggested and Adam laughed.
Josh wasn’t a napper. In fact, he seemed to have boundless stores of energy. He was up for multiple rounds of hide and seek, tag, and chase Lily with a squirt bottle. Sparky liked that one too. To say Sparky was high-strung would be understatement.
“I think they should have named that dog Shaky,” Adam said, looking at Sparky and furrowing his brows.
“I think he’s actually vibrating,” I answered. “He seems pretty tense.”
“He’s a purebred pointer and he’s still got his balls. They probably only mate him on a certain schedule. I would be tense too.”
“Speaking of tense, you wouldn’t let me touch you when we were at your parents’ place but you had sex in their basement with Abby’s college roommate?”
“I was seventeen. I was more hard-up than Shaky over there.” At that moment, Sparky was busy humping a sofa pillow.
“So, because you’re not hard-up now, does that mean that you won’t want to have sex tonight because we’re in your sister’s house?”
“Who says I’m not hard-up? It’s been a whole week. If I don’t get some tonight I might wind up like him.” Sparky had ended his relationship with the pillow and moved on to a rubber tree plant. “He’s probably humped everything in this room. Maybe when I walk him later I’ll look the other way when we pass a cute girl dog.”
Chapter Fifteen
The rest of the day went pretty smoothly. Josh played. We entertained him. Adam made a decent dinner and I assisted. Afterward, I cleaned up while he took Sparky for his walk. It was longer than twenty minutes and I suspected that Adam really had set out to get Sparky laid. When they got back Sparky seemed much calmer and suspiciously happy looking.
“You found that dog some tail didn’t you?” I asked as I put the last of the dishes in the dishwasher while Josh played in the living-room with his toy cars.
“Let’s just say that there might me some poodle pointer puppies in a few months.”
“A poodle? Oh please,” I said rolling my eyes.
“Hey, she was available and willing.”
“You guys all stick together.”
“So, am I going to get some tail later?” he asked coming up behind me and pushing his hips against me.
“I might be available and willing,” I answered rubbing my bottom against him.
“God, I’m horny,” he whispered in my ear.
“Mmm. Me too,” I replied, as he ran his hands all over me.
“Are you tickling Aunt Lily?” Josh asked from the doorway and we flew to opposite sides of the kitchen like a bomb had gone off between us.
“It’s almost time for a bath,” Adam announced a little too cheerfully.
“Can I bring my dump truck?”
“No dump truck, but we can play with other stuff,” Adam told him. “Aunt Lily will get your pajamas while I get you in the tub.”
I went off to Josh’s room to find his jammies and a book to read while Adam took him off to bathroom. By the time I had laid out everything for him he was happily splashing around in his bath. Adam was kneeling beside the tub with his sleeves rolled up, wiping Josh down with a wash cloth. It was so sweet that I got a lump in my throat.
“I have a penis,” Josh announced out of the blue, pointing down into the water.
“That’s because you’re a boy,” I explained sagely.
“Does Uncle Adam have a penis?”
“Oh yeah,” I said with a smile. Adam looked up at me and tried not to laugh.
“Yeah,” I said nervously. “I don’t have any experience with kids myself and my mom was always working, so I don’t really have any good role models other than maybe some of the better babysitters.”
“I’m sure that’s exactly what she wants to hear before leaving her child in your care,” Adam said.
“I’m not worried,” Hannah said reassuringly. “If you can handle Adam you can handle Josh. And I have good instincts about people. I think you’ll be a natural, Lily. Just remember, though, we all figure it out when we need to.” Adam turned and lifted his eyebrows at me in a silent “I told you so.”
“Okay, well, you guys should get going on your romantic getaway,” I said.
“Yeah, I don’t know when we’ll get another one. Enjoy your private time while you can. Once you have kids it gets much more complicated.”
Nate took their bags out to the car and then he and Hannah said goodbye to Josh. My heart ached watching it. They would just be gone for the night, but I could see that both Hannah and Josh were trying to be brave.
She promised him that he would have fun with Uncle Adam and Aunt Lily and that Mommy and Daddy would be back the next day. Josh nodded and hugged her hard. I almost had an emotional breakdown right there in the driveway. When they left, we held little hands and went back into the house. I had a feeling it was Elmo time.
Two hours later, with the theme to Elmo’s World permanently burned into my brain, it occurred to me that it was noon and Josh was probably getting hungry.
“Josh, it’s time for lunch,” I said brightly. “How about a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and some milk?”
“I want mac and cheese please,” he said gazing up at me with huge brown eyes that looked a whole lot like Adam’s. I melted. The kid owned me.
“Well, okay, but just for lunch, not for dinner too.”
“Hang on a minute,” Adam interrupted. “Okay, you want mac and cheese you’re going to have to have some carrot sticks too.”
“I don’t want carrot sticks. Celery with peanut butter is okay.”
“Alright but then you also drink some apple juice.”
“Okay.”
“So, mac and cheese, celery sticks with peanut butter and apple juice. You’ve got a deal.” Adam walked over and shook his hand. “Now go wash up and we’ll meet you in the kitchen.” Josh marched off toward the bathroom and I turned to Adam.
“That was very impressive.”
“It’s just a matter of negotiation, Lilith. Don’t ever accept the first offer.” He came over and put his arms around me, grabbing my bottom. “So, you think this kid naps?”
“Maybe we can drug him,” I suggested and Adam laughed.
Josh wasn’t a napper. In fact, he seemed to have boundless stores of energy. He was up for multiple rounds of hide and seek, tag, and chase Lily with a squirt bottle. Sparky liked that one too. To say Sparky was high-strung would be understatement.
“I think they should have named that dog Shaky,” Adam said, looking at Sparky and furrowing his brows.
“I think he’s actually vibrating,” I answered. “He seems pretty tense.”
“He’s a purebred pointer and he’s still got his balls. They probably only mate him on a certain schedule. I would be tense too.”
“Speaking of tense, you wouldn’t let me touch you when we were at your parents’ place but you had sex in their basement with Abby’s college roommate?”
“I was seventeen. I was more hard-up than Shaky over there.” At that moment, Sparky was busy humping a sofa pillow.
“So, because you’re not hard-up now, does that mean that you won’t want to have sex tonight because we’re in your sister’s house?”
“Who says I’m not hard-up? It’s been a whole week. If I don’t get some tonight I might wind up like him.” Sparky had ended his relationship with the pillow and moved on to a rubber tree plant. “He’s probably humped everything in this room. Maybe when I walk him later I’ll look the other way when we pass a cute girl dog.”
Chapter Fifteen
The rest of the day went pretty smoothly. Josh played. We entertained him. Adam made a decent dinner and I assisted. Afterward, I cleaned up while he took Sparky for his walk. It was longer than twenty minutes and I suspected that Adam really had set out to get Sparky laid. When they got back Sparky seemed much calmer and suspiciously happy looking.
“You found that dog some tail didn’t you?” I asked as I put the last of the dishes in the dishwasher while Josh played in the living-room with his toy cars.
“Let’s just say that there might me some poodle pointer puppies in a few months.”
“A poodle? Oh please,” I said rolling my eyes.
“Hey, she was available and willing.”
“You guys all stick together.”
“So, am I going to get some tail later?” he asked coming up behind me and pushing his hips against me.
“I might be available and willing,” I answered rubbing my bottom against him.
“God, I’m horny,” he whispered in my ear.
“Mmm. Me too,” I replied, as he ran his hands all over me.
“Are you tickling Aunt Lily?” Josh asked from the doorway and we flew to opposite sides of the kitchen like a bomb had gone off between us.
“It’s almost time for a bath,” Adam announced a little too cheerfully.
“Can I bring my dump truck?”
“No dump truck, but we can play with other stuff,” Adam told him. “Aunt Lily will get your pajamas while I get you in the tub.”
I went off to Josh’s room to find his jammies and a book to read while Adam took him off to bathroom. By the time I had laid out everything for him he was happily splashing around in his bath. Adam was kneeling beside the tub with his sleeves rolled up, wiping Josh down with a wash cloth. It was so sweet that I got a lump in my throat.
“I have a penis,” Josh announced out of the blue, pointing down into the water.
“That’s because you’re a boy,” I explained sagely.
“Does Uncle Adam have a penis?”
“Oh yeah,” I said with a smile. Adam looked up at me and tried not to laugh.
