Letting Go
Page 37
Her hands were everywhere—lightly traveling up my stomach and chest, across my shoulders, down my back. This was something I’d dreamed of for years, and never thought I would experience—and for a second, I wondered if I was still sleeping and would wake up and find her on the other side of the bed. Her fingers trailed over my abdomen, and a low groan sounded in my chest when she moved them just inside the top of my jeans.
Sitting back, I took in her flushed cheeks, swollen lips, and hooded eyes, and knew I would never forget the way she looked right then. Dipping my head down to her stomach, I pushed the bottom of her shirt up slowly, my mouth following the movement. Her breathing deepened and her hands moved up to gently grasp the back of my neck as I continued to move upward. I pushed the shirt just past her br**sts, and let my lips linger on them for a moment, then Grey was pulling me up and crushing her mouth to mine. I settled myself between her legs, and had to clench my fists against the comforter when she moved her h*ps against me so I wouldn’t tear off her shorts right then.
“Jag,” she breathed against my mouth, her hands trailing down to the top of my jeans again. “I want . . .” She trailed off.
“Tell me—”
“Jagger?” a female voice called out from below the loft, and Grey and I both froze. “Your car is here, where are you?”
“Charlie,” we whispered at the same time, and Grey’s eyes were no longer hooded or dark with need; she looked terrified, and one hand was quick to grip at Ben’s ring when she realized the position we were in.
I turned my head and pushed myself off her so she wouldn’t see how much that action killed me after the last ten minutes.
“Jag?” Charlie yelled from the hallway.
“Yeah! Be down in a sec.”
I caught sight of Grey just before I pulled my shirt on, and wished I hadn’t. She’d already fixed her shirt and was sitting up on the bed, her eyes wide as she stared straight ahead, not seeing anything.
“Grey.” I waited until she looked up at me, and held my hand out to her. “Come on, let’s go downstairs.”
She nodded and mumbled something too low for me to hear as I pulled her off the bed.
Just before we hit the top of the stairs, I looked back at her and whispered, “I’m sorry.”
Not waiting for a response, I jogged down the stairs and wished I could go back to sleep when I saw my sister’s face. She was staring at Grey with a look close to betrayal, and once again, I was left not understanding my sister at all.
“Hey,” I finally said to break the tension coming from each girl. “I didn’t know you were coming back so soon.”
Charlie finally looked over at me, her voice soft and unsure. “I told you I’d be back tonight.”
“We just woke up. I don’t even know what time it is.”
Charlie didn’t say anything, and Grey finally shook off whatever she’d been wrapped up in to say, “Did you have fun?”
“Um. Yeah, it was—well, I’m glad to be home. But I should leave.”
“Charlie,” I grumbled at the same time Grey said on a laugh, “What? No!”
Charlie took a step back and pointed behind her. “No, really, I should. I should’ve called or something so I wouldn’t interrupt anything.”
“You didn’t,” Grey assured her, and my eyes darted over to her. “Jagger stayed up drawing all night, so we fell asleep after lunch. We just woke up, you weren’t interrupting anything.”
Part of me knew that Grey would’ve said that no matter what. It’s not like I wanted my sister to know what I did with Grey when we were alone, but I couldn’t help but think of the panicked look on Grey’s face when we’d broken apart, and the way she’d been gripping Ben’s ring.
“Um . . . okay,” Charlie mumbled before looking back at me.
“Oh my God, I had no idea it was this late.”
I looked over at the microwave to check the time, but right now the fact that we’d slept until seven wasn’t enough to faze me. My sister still looked hurt and betrayed, and Grey was standing far enough away from me that I couldn’t touch her if I tried.
“Are you hungry? We can order something, or I’ll make dinner.”
Charlie’s head jerked back, her eyes stuck on me before they slowly drifted to Grey. “Do you live here now?”
Grey’s face fell at my sister’s tone, and she scrambled to find something to say. “No . . . I don’t, I just . . .” She trailed off and looked helplessly around. “Jagger doesn’t cook, and I thought you might be—I’m gonna go home.”
I didn’t say anything; I didn’t know what to say in that moment. I was pissed off and so f**king confused. My sister and my girl were trying to leave, both looked uncomfortable, and I had no idea what to do to fix it.
“No, don’t,” Charlie said just as Grey started walking toward the bar to get her purse. “I’m sorry, it’s been a long day and I’m just crabby. I was with those girls in a car for a month and a half, it all got to be too much. We can order something, and I want you to stay, I’ve only seen you once since you moved back.”
Grey turned to look at me, but my eyes were still on Charlie. She sounded and looked like my sister again, but there was still that underlying hurt in her eyes. When I realized they were both looking at me, I cleared my throat and shrugged. “I don’t want either of you to leave. Decide what you want, I’ll call the restaurant.”
Sitting back, I took in her flushed cheeks, swollen lips, and hooded eyes, and knew I would never forget the way she looked right then. Dipping my head down to her stomach, I pushed the bottom of her shirt up slowly, my mouth following the movement. Her breathing deepened and her hands moved up to gently grasp the back of my neck as I continued to move upward. I pushed the shirt just past her br**sts, and let my lips linger on them for a moment, then Grey was pulling me up and crushing her mouth to mine. I settled myself between her legs, and had to clench my fists against the comforter when she moved her h*ps against me so I wouldn’t tear off her shorts right then.
“Jag,” she breathed against my mouth, her hands trailing down to the top of my jeans again. “I want . . .” She trailed off.
“Tell me—”
“Jagger?” a female voice called out from below the loft, and Grey and I both froze. “Your car is here, where are you?”
“Charlie,” we whispered at the same time, and Grey’s eyes were no longer hooded or dark with need; she looked terrified, and one hand was quick to grip at Ben’s ring when she realized the position we were in.
I turned my head and pushed myself off her so she wouldn’t see how much that action killed me after the last ten minutes.
“Jag?” Charlie yelled from the hallway.
“Yeah! Be down in a sec.”
I caught sight of Grey just before I pulled my shirt on, and wished I hadn’t. She’d already fixed her shirt and was sitting up on the bed, her eyes wide as she stared straight ahead, not seeing anything.
“Grey.” I waited until she looked up at me, and held my hand out to her. “Come on, let’s go downstairs.”
She nodded and mumbled something too low for me to hear as I pulled her off the bed.
Just before we hit the top of the stairs, I looked back at her and whispered, “I’m sorry.”
Not waiting for a response, I jogged down the stairs and wished I could go back to sleep when I saw my sister’s face. She was staring at Grey with a look close to betrayal, and once again, I was left not understanding my sister at all.
“Hey,” I finally said to break the tension coming from each girl. “I didn’t know you were coming back so soon.”
Charlie finally looked over at me, her voice soft and unsure. “I told you I’d be back tonight.”
“We just woke up. I don’t even know what time it is.”
Charlie didn’t say anything, and Grey finally shook off whatever she’d been wrapped up in to say, “Did you have fun?”
“Um. Yeah, it was—well, I’m glad to be home. But I should leave.”
“Charlie,” I grumbled at the same time Grey said on a laugh, “What? No!”
Charlie took a step back and pointed behind her. “No, really, I should. I should’ve called or something so I wouldn’t interrupt anything.”
“You didn’t,” Grey assured her, and my eyes darted over to her. “Jagger stayed up drawing all night, so we fell asleep after lunch. We just woke up, you weren’t interrupting anything.”
Part of me knew that Grey would’ve said that no matter what. It’s not like I wanted my sister to know what I did with Grey when we were alone, but I couldn’t help but think of the panicked look on Grey’s face when we’d broken apart, and the way she’d been gripping Ben’s ring.
“Um . . . okay,” Charlie mumbled before looking back at me.
“Oh my God, I had no idea it was this late.”
I looked over at the microwave to check the time, but right now the fact that we’d slept until seven wasn’t enough to faze me. My sister still looked hurt and betrayed, and Grey was standing far enough away from me that I couldn’t touch her if I tried.
“Are you hungry? We can order something, or I’ll make dinner.”
Charlie’s head jerked back, her eyes stuck on me before they slowly drifted to Grey. “Do you live here now?”
Grey’s face fell at my sister’s tone, and she scrambled to find something to say. “No . . . I don’t, I just . . .” She trailed off and looked helplessly around. “Jagger doesn’t cook, and I thought you might be—I’m gonna go home.”
I didn’t say anything; I didn’t know what to say in that moment. I was pissed off and so f**king confused. My sister and my girl were trying to leave, both looked uncomfortable, and I had no idea what to do to fix it.
“No, don’t,” Charlie said just as Grey started walking toward the bar to get her purse. “I’m sorry, it’s been a long day and I’m just crabby. I was with those girls in a car for a month and a half, it all got to be too much. We can order something, and I want you to stay, I’ve only seen you once since you moved back.”
Grey turned to look at me, but my eyes were still on Charlie. She sounded and looked like my sister again, but there was still that underlying hurt in her eyes. When I realized they were both looking at me, I cleared my throat and shrugged. “I don’t want either of you to leave. Decide what you want, I’ll call the restaurant.”
