Life After Theft
Page 64
She forced a smile, but fakeness radiated from her so brightly I couldn’t believe I’d ever been fooled. “I stole her skirt and shoes. I already admitted I shouldn’t have done that.”
“Don’t give me that!”
“What?”
“This I’m-just-a-poor-demented-klepto crap. Stealing was the least of your problems, Kimberlee. And I should have realized it a long time ago.”
Something must have changed in my voice, because Kimberlee stared silently up at me for a long time. “I wasn’t very nice to her. We talked about this already.”
“No, it was more than that. You did everything you could to sabotage her. You can’t stand to hear me talk about her. You hate her. Why?”
“I just do. Some people rub you the wrong way and—”
“Why!” I shouted.
Her lips pressed into a straight line and her hands found her hips as if pulled by a magnet. “Because some people just need to be brought down a peg,” Kimberlee said, sneering. “She thinks she’s so good, so above everyone else. I heard her bragging one day how she was stoned the day she tried out for cheer. And she still made it. That’s how superior she thinks she is. And she believes it so much, everyone else started believing it, too! Even you. But I know what she did. I know who she really is. She let someone die, Jeff!” Kimberlee laughed, a short, scoffing breath. “And she can blame it on drugs all she wants, but it’s an act. Everything, everyone in this town is acting. And you’re fooled by all of them. You think everyone’s so genuine. But it’s all just fake. Everyone is cold and bitter and fake! Just like me,” she finished in a whisper.
But I was already shaking my head. “No, that’s why you hate yourself. Maybe she was like that once, but she’s changed. She learned how to be better and you can’t accept that. You want her to be like you.”
“She is like me,” Kimberlee shouted. “You just can’t see it. Nobody just changes like that. Not really. She’s still a messed-up druggie on the inside. I hate her, she’s a bitch, end of story.”
“So what’s the beginning of the story?”
“What the hell are you talking about?”
“Why her? Of all the cheerful little freshmen you could decide to warp—why her?”
Her eyes darted away and I knew I’d hit it. “She bugged me—do I need a reason?”
“Why!”
“Shut up!”
“Why!” I yelled so loudly, I was sure our neighbors were going to call the cops soon.
“He adored her the way he would never adore me, okay?” Kimberlee shouted. She sat back on the bed. “After Preston left, what did Khail do? Started hanging out with his sister twenty-four seven,” she said, scoffing. “And I saw how nice he could be—how careful he was with her. Defended her, protected her, and I hated that I would never have that.”
“She’s his sister, Kimberlee. It’s what brothers do.”
“Not all brothers. Her brother. She gets everything she wants in life. Waltzed right onto the cheer squad, got off easy when her friend died—rehab? Please. On top of that, after years of stealing, she’s still the only person who ever caught me. What is she, Superwoman? It’s not fair. She needed to be dropped down a few notches and I took care of it.”
“Took care of it? You beat her up. You made her life hell. You chopped off her hair—after Khail asked you to leave her alone. Put his secret on the line to get you to stop. That’s not bringing her down—that’s stomping her into the ground for your own amusement. What is wrong with you?”
“What is wrong with you? What, did she finally let you screw her? That’s the only thing that makes guys act like this.”
I looked straight into her eyes, refusing to yield. “No, Kimberlee, it’s not. I don’t need that from her to see who she is. A girl who’s decent and kind and works hard for what she wants in life. Who doesn’t manipulate anyone she thinks can help her, or sabotage whoever gets in her way. A girl I may have lost because I fell for your act.”
“Oh, come on. You think she didn’t sleep around? Let’s just put it this way; I would need to take my shoes off to count how many guys she slept with her freshman year. That’s what really gets you. You’ve made Sera out to be this paradigm of perfection, but in the end, she’s just like me.”
“She’s nothing like you,” I said through gritted teeth as the twisted truth of her words rocked through me. “Not anymore. She let that life go. She moved on, Kimberlee. Something you obviously can’t do. Not alive or dead. And maybe, even if you can’t see it, that’s why you hate her.” I turned away before I could start yelling again, and headed toward the door. My hand was on the knob when I realized something and looked over my shoulder at Kimberlee. “You’re not stuck here because of the stuff you stole. You’re here because nothing and no one in the universe wants you.”
Thirty
I GAVE THE WOODEN STAKE one more good pound and stood to survey my work. My arms and back hurt from swinging the hammer, but I’d finished early enough to beat the sun going down. I looked up at the dark gray clouds and hoped they would wait just a few more minutes before dumping on me. After two deep, calming breaths I grabbed the last poster, holding it against my chest as I dialed Sera’s number on my cell phone.
“I don’t want to talk to you, Jeff.” Beep.
“Don’t give me that!”
“What?”
“This I’m-just-a-poor-demented-klepto crap. Stealing was the least of your problems, Kimberlee. And I should have realized it a long time ago.”
Something must have changed in my voice, because Kimberlee stared silently up at me for a long time. “I wasn’t very nice to her. We talked about this already.”
“No, it was more than that. You did everything you could to sabotage her. You can’t stand to hear me talk about her. You hate her. Why?”
“I just do. Some people rub you the wrong way and—”
“Why!” I shouted.
Her lips pressed into a straight line and her hands found her hips as if pulled by a magnet. “Because some people just need to be brought down a peg,” Kimberlee said, sneering. “She thinks she’s so good, so above everyone else. I heard her bragging one day how she was stoned the day she tried out for cheer. And she still made it. That’s how superior she thinks she is. And she believes it so much, everyone else started believing it, too! Even you. But I know what she did. I know who she really is. She let someone die, Jeff!” Kimberlee laughed, a short, scoffing breath. “And she can blame it on drugs all she wants, but it’s an act. Everything, everyone in this town is acting. And you’re fooled by all of them. You think everyone’s so genuine. But it’s all just fake. Everyone is cold and bitter and fake! Just like me,” she finished in a whisper.
But I was already shaking my head. “No, that’s why you hate yourself. Maybe she was like that once, but she’s changed. She learned how to be better and you can’t accept that. You want her to be like you.”
“She is like me,” Kimberlee shouted. “You just can’t see it. Nobody just changes like that. Not really. She’s still a messed-up druggie on the inside. I hate her, she’s a bitch, end of story.”
“So what’s the beginning of the story?”
“What the hell are you talking about?”
“Why her? Of all the cheerful little freshmen you could decide to warp—why her?”
Her eyes darted away and I knew I’d hit it. “She bugged me—do I need a reason?”
“Why!”
“Shut up!”
“Why!” I yelled so loudly, I was sure our neighbors were going to call the cops soon.
“He adored her the way he would never adore me, okay?” Kimberlee shouted. She sat back on the bed. “After Preston left, what did Khail do? Started hanging out with his sister twenty-four seven,” she said, scoffing. “And I saw how nice he could be—how careful he was with her. Defended her, protected her, and I hated that I would never have that.”
“She’s his sister, Kimberlee. It’s what brothers do.”
“Not all brothers. Her brother. She gets everything she wants in life. Waltzed right onto the cheer squad, got off easy when her friend died—rehab? Please. On top of that, after years of stealing, she’s still the only person who ever caught me. What is she, Superwoman? It’s not fair. She needed to be dropped down a few notches and I took care of it.”
“Took care of it? You beat her up. You made her life hell. You chopped off her hair—after Khail asked you to leave her alone. Put his secret on the line to get you to stop. That’s not bringing her down—that’s stomping her into the ground for your own amusement. What is wrong with you?”
“What is wrong with you? What, did she finally let you screw her? That’s the only thing that makes guys act like this.”
I looked straight into her eyes, refusing to yield. “No, Kimberlee, it’s not. I don’t need that from her to see who she is. A girl who’s decent and kind and works hard for what she wants in life. Who doesn’t manipulate anyone she thinks can help her, or sabotage whoever gets in her way. A girl I may have lost because I fell for your act.”
“Oh, come on. You think she didn’t sleep around? Let’s just put it this way; I would need to take my shoes off to count how many guys she slept with her freshman year. That’s what really gets you. You’ve made Sera out to be this paradigm of perfection, but in the end, she’s just like me.”
“She’s nothing like you,” I said through gritted teeth as the twisted truth of her words rocked through me. “Not anymore. She let that life go. She moved on, Kimberlee. Something you obviously can’t do. Not alive or dead. And maybe, even if you can’t see it, that’s why you hate her.” I turned away before I could start yelling again, and headed toward the door. My hand was on the knob when I realized something and looked over my shoulder at Kimberlee. “You’re not stuck here because of the stuff you stole. You’re here because nothing and no one in the universe wants you.”
Thirty
I GAVE THE WOODEN STAKE one more good pound and stood to survey my work. My arms and back hurt from swinging the hammer, but I’d finished early enough to beat the sun going down. I looked up at the dark gray clouds and hoped they would wait just a few more minutes before dumping on me. After two deep, calming breaths I grabbed the last poster, holding it against my chest as I dialed Sera’s number on my cell phone.
“I don’t want to talk to you, Jeff.” Beep.
