Lord of the Fading Lands
Page 65
"But why would this `Eye of Truth' send you to find me?”
He took his hand from her face. Her cheek felt cold and bereft at the sudden absence of his warmth. "You are my shei'tani. My truemate.”
"Is that what the Eye does? Sends Fey warriors to find their truemates?"
"Nei, but you are no ordinary truemate, if there is such a thing.”
"What do you mean?”
"I am the Feyreisen, the Tairen Soul, and yet you are my truemate. No Tairen Soul before me has ever had a shei'tani."
"What about Lady Sariel?”
He shook his head. "We loved as children. She knew I would never have a shei'tani and loved me enough to join her life with mine, giving up her desire for a shei'tan of her own.”
"I don't understand.”
"She was e'tani, the mate of my heart. We chose the bond. You are shei'tani, the mate of my soul, my truemate. A Fey doesn't choose the truemate bond. It chooses the Fey. For me there will never be another, whether you accept the bond or not.”
"And for me?”
His eyes held an odd combination of remorse and satisfaction. "Nei. You would not be my truemate were I not also yours. If you do not accept our bond, perhaps one day there might be a man with whom you could find some measure of happiness, but there will be no other mate who can reach your soul.”
Why didn't the prospect of never loving any man but him fill her with dread? It should have frightened her, or at the very least made her cry out against the unfairness of it all. And yet she could not help feeling an answering surge of satisfaction as her soul rose up to recognize and thrill in the bond between them.
She knew the instant her feelings reached him. His eyes flared. Magic wrapped around her with sudden electric warmth. But the warmth changed in an instant as a powerful primitive force invaded her mind, calling to her, roaring with triumph and searing hunger, battering at the privacy of her soul. She felt something inside her start to give way, and fear rose hard and fast. With a cry, she flung herself out of Rain's arms. Rain groaned aloud, a raw hoarse sound. His hands fisted and he closed his eyes. Sparks flashed around him like fireflies.
"Sieks'ta," he apologized tightly. "Do not be frightened. It is the tairen in me that frightens you, but I can control it. I will control it, shei'tani. I promise you. Please, do not shrink from me." Even as he spoke, the sparks began to fade.
"The tairen?" Her heart was pounding, her breath coming in shallow gasps.
"The tairen lives in all Fey warriors," he replied, opening his eyes. Relief flooded her as she saw that his control was back. His magic no longer sparkled around him, the glow in his eyes was dimming. "In most it is dormant, but when a Fey is born with full strength in all the Fey magics, the tairen awakens. These Fey become Tairen Souls. The tairen is conscious within them, leashed by their will, but always driving the Fey with the same instincts of a true tairen.”
"It-it attacked me.”
"Nei. It did not attack, it tried to claim." His hand reached out, but stopped shy of touching her face. He pulled his hand back, thrust his fingers through his hair, and sighed. "Mating and the claiming of a mate is the fiercest of any tairen instinct. I have recognized you as my shei'tani. A moment ago your soul reached out, willingly, to mine. I felt it. The tairen in me responded as any tairen would to its mate. I should have been prepared. I was not." His eyelids lowered. "For this, I apologize. I have dishonored myself.”
Even though she was still frightened, her heart could not bear to see him humbled. He was the Tairen Soul, the hero of her life's dreams. And for some strange reason, some joke of the gods she could not hope to fathom, he had claimed her as his mate. She bit her lip in indecision, then dragged a deep breath into her lungs and stepped forward to clasp his hands.
At her touch, his eyes flew open and fixed on hers. "Shei'tani?”
"I'm the one who should be sorry," she told him. "You asked me not to fear you, to understand that you would never hurt me, but at the first test, I let myself be terrified. I'm afraid I'm not going to be a very good truemate for a Tairen Soul. I'm a coward at heart.”
"You are all that a truemate should be," he told her firmly. "Never think otherwise." The harsh line of his mouth softened. "Come," he said. "The afternoon is ours to enjoy. What would you like to do?”
She bit her lip. "Actually, I have another appointment with the queen's dressmaker to review fabric samples for my wedding dress.”
"This does not appear to please you.”
"No," she admitted. She wasn't looking forward to yet another half day of sneering dislike from the cold, haughty tradesmen recommended by Queen Annoura. She'd particularly hated standing in the presence of Maestra Binchi, the queen's dressmaker, this morning, being measured—both physically and figuratively—by a woman who obviously found Ellie lacking. "But she's making a special effort to fit me into her schedule. Besides, I have an appointment at the palace with the queen's Master of Graces after that.”
Rain glanced at Bel for a moment and his face grew still. A hint of anger entered his eyes, and Ellie realized Belliard had just related the morning's events. Rain's next words confirmed her suspicions. "Bel has told me of this dressmaker. You are the Feyreisa. She will attend your pleasure, not the other way around. As will the queen's Master of Graces.”
He took his hand from her face. Her cheek felt cold and bereft at the sudden absence of his warmth. "You are my shei'tani. My truemate.”
"Is that what the Eye does? Sends Fey warriors to find their truemates?"
"Nei, but you are no ordinary truemate, if there is such a thing.”
"What do you mean?”
"I am the Feyreisen, the Tairen Soul, and yet you are my truemate. No Tairen Soul before me has ever had a shei'tani."
"What about Lady Sariel?”
He shook his head. "We loved as children. She knew I would never have a shei'tani and loved me enough to join her life with mine, giving up her desire for a shei'tan of her own.”
"I don't understand.”
"She was e'tani, the mate of my heart. We chose the bond. You are shei'tani, the mate of my soul, my truemate. A Fey doesn't choose the truemate bond. It chooses the Fey. For me there will never be another, whether you accept the bond or not.”
"And for me?”
His eyes held an odd combination of remorse and satisfaction. "Nei. You would not be my truemate were I not also yours. If you do not accept our bond, perhaps one day there might be a man with whom you could find some measure of happiness, but there will be no other mate who can reach your soul.”
Why didn't the prospect of never loving any man but him fill her with dread? It should have frightened her, or at the very least made her cry out against the unfairness of it all. And yet she could not help feeling an answering surge of satisfaction as her soul rose up to recognize and thrill in the bond between them.
She knew the instant her feelings reached him. His eyes flared. Magic wrapped around her with sudden electric warmth. But the warmth changed in an instant as a powerful primitive force invaded her mind, calling to her, roaring with triumph and searing hunger, battering at the privacy of her soul. She felt something inside her start to give way, and fear rose hard and fast. With a cry, she flung herself out of Rain's arms. Rain groaned aloud, a raw hoarse sound. His hands fisted and he closed his eyes. Sparks flashed around him like fireflies.
"Sieks'ta," he apologized tightly. "Do not be frightened. It is the tairen in me that frightens you, but I can control it. I will control it, shei'tani. I promise you. Please, do not shrink from me." Even as he spoke, the sparks began to fade.
"The tairen?" Her heart was pounding, her breath coming in shallow gasps.
"The tairen lives in all Fey warriors," he replied, opening his eyes. Relief flooded her as she saw that his control was back. His magic no longer sparkled around him, the glow in his eyes was dimming. "In most it is dormant, but when a Fey is born with full strength in all the Fey magics, the tairen awakens. These Fey become Tairen Souls. The tairen is conscious within them, leashed by their will, but always driving the Fey with the same instincts of a true tairen.”
"It-it attacked me.”
"Nei. It did not attack, it tried to claim." His hand reached out, but stopped shy of touching her face. He pulled his hand back, thrust his fingers through his hair, and sighed. "Mating and the claiming of a mate is the fiercest of any tairen instinct. I have recognized you as my shei'tani. A moment ago your soul reached out, willingly, to mine. I felt it. The tairen in me responded as any tairen would to its mate. I should have been prepared. I was not." His eyelids lowered. "For this, I apologize. I have dishonored myself.”
Even though she was still frightened, her heart could not bear to see him humbled. He was the Tairen Soul, the hero of her life's dreams. And for some strange reason, some joke of the gods she could not hope to fathom, he had claimed her as his mate. She bit her lip in indecision, then dragged a deep breath into her lungs and stepped forward to clasp his hands.
At her touch, his eyes flew open and fixed on hers. "Shei'tani?”
"I'm the one who should be sorry," she told him. "You asked me not to fear you, to understand that you would never hurt me, but at the first test, I let myself be terrified. I'm afraid I'm not going to be a very good truemate for a Tairen Soul. I'm a coward at heart.”
"You are all that a truemate should be," he told her firmly. "Never think otherwise." The harsh line of his mouth softened. "Come," he said. "The afternoon is ours to enjoy. What would you like to do?”
She bit her lip. "Actually, I have another appointment with the queen's dressmaker to review fabric samples for my wedding dress.”
"This does not appear to please you.”
"No," she admitted. She wasn't looking forward to yet another half day of sneering dislike from the cold, haughty tradesmen recommended by Queen Annoura. She'd particularly hated standing in the presence of Maestra Binchi, the queen's dressmaker, this morning, being measured—both physically and figuratively—by a woman who obviously found Ellie lacking. "But she's making a special effort to fit me into her schedule. Besides, I have an appointment at the palace with the queen's Master of Graces after that.”
Rain glanced at Bel for a moment and his face grew still. A hint of anger entered his eyes, and Ellie realized Belliard had just related the morning's events. Rain's next words confirmed her suspicions. "Bel has told me of this dressmaker. You are the Feyreisa. She will attend your pleasure, not the other way around. As will the queen's Master of Graces.”