Loving Cara
Page 71
“If you try to run from me right now, Cara, so help me . . .”
“I’m just getting dressed! I can’t fight with you naked!” Satisfied that I’m now covered, I quickly pull my hair up into a knot to keep it out of my way.
“I’m not a part of your family. I get it. But the way you spoke to me before you got in that ambulance—”
“I did not tell you that you aren’t a part of my family!” His voice rises as he stands and paces around the room. “Jesus, Cara, I asked you to move in with me. If I didn’t think of you as a part of my family, I never would have done that.”
“You were cold and heartless, and not the man I’d fallen in love with. I saw a side to you that scared the fuck out of me, Josh.”
He stops before the window, staring outside, and braces his hands on his hips.
“I’m sorry,” he murmurs, and then turns to look at me again. “I’m very sorry for that. I’m excellent in dealing with emergencies when it comes to the animals on the ranch, but seeing Seth hurt, and that rushing water, knowing you could have both been killed, it just destroyed me, and then . . .”
His hands shake as he pushes them through his hair. “I couldn’t find you.” He swallows, his voice quiet and rough. “I’ve never been that scared in my life. I didn’t know if something had happened to you. I couldn’t find you.”
His voice catches and he stops talking, swallows again, and shakes his head in disbelief as he leans his hips against the windowsill, and in this moment, my resolve disappears and I’ll do anything to make this right.
“I couldn’t find you. You own me, Carolina. Body and soul. I promise this will never happen again.”
I stay still, watching him carefully, taking in the handsome man who possesses my heart.
“I’m sorry too. I shouldn’t have handled it like that.”
“I need to know that you’re not going to run again. If you get scared, come to me, baby.”
“And I need to know that when we’re in a crisis again that I can depend on you to be the strong man that took care of me when the tree fell through my roof.”
“Who the fuck is Adam?” he suddenly asks.
“What?” I’m struck dumb, frowning at him. “I don’t know an Adam.”
He pulls his phone out of his pocket, wakes it up and brings up my text messages, and holds the phone out, showing them to me.
Cara: Meat me above.
Cara: Go Adam.
“Fucking autocorrect,” I mutter, and then start to giggle. I clap my hand over my mouth, my eyes wide and glued to his phone, and then I can’t stand it anymore, the dam bursts, and I begin laughing and laughing, holding my belly and falling back on the bed.
I let out a most unladylike snort, and that makes me laugh even harder.
“I don’t even remember,” I gasp, “what the fuck I was trying to say.”
The laughter begins to calm and I sit up and push my hair off my face, panting and wiping the tears from my eyes. When I glance at Josh, he’s grinning at me, his eyes soft and loving, and I think the storm is almost over.
He tosses the phone on the nearby dresser, pins me in his gaze, and sighs. “Come here, Cara.”
Staying where I am, I slowly shake my head back and forth and take a long, deep breath.
“No?” he asks quietly, and again I shake my head. He crosses his arms over his chest and narrows his eyes. “Come. Here.”
“Why?”
He raises his eyebrows and doesn’t answer, the dimple in his cheek still winking at me, waiting for me to do as he asks.
Finally, I stand, walk around the bed, and stop a few feet in front of him. “Now what?”
His eyes travel leisurely down my body and back up again, taking in my hair and eyes. No part of me goes untouched by his eyes.
“I can’t stay mad at you when you laugh like that,” he murmurs. “I love it when you laugh.”
“Josh?”
“Yes.”
“I love you.”
He doesn’t move.
“I really need . . .” I hate how my voice quivers as my emotions surge to the surface.
“What?”
“I really need you to hug me.”
He watches me for a long moment, then closes his eyes and exhales deeply and folds me into his arms, holding me hard and close, and I begin to cry in earnest, relieved that he’s here.
“I love you too, Cara,” he whispers in my ear.
“I’m so sorry,” I cry.
“Me too.” He kisses my head and runs his hands up and down my back.
“I thought you didn’t want me.”
“Cara, how could you think that?” His arms tighten more, as though he’s afraid I’ll run again. “After everything we’ve been though?”
“I know it’s stupid now, but it just sounded so horrible and I didn’t think to ask you who you were talking about.”
He swoops down and lifts my dress over my head and me into his arms, lays me gently against the soft sheets, and then stands up.
“You’re entirely overdressed,” I inform him with a shaky smile.
He yanks his shirt out of his jeans and strips out of it, giving me an awesome view of his muscular torso. He unfastens his belt buckle and jeans and hastily shoves them down his legs, along with his shorts, and comes back to me, completely naked.
“That’s better.”
“I’m just getting dressed! I can’t fight with you naked!” Satisfied that I’m now covered, I quickly pull my hair up into a knot to keep it out of my way.
“I’m not a part of your family. I get it. But the way you spoke to me before you got in that ambulance—”
“I did not tell you that you aren’t a part of my family!” His voice rises as he stands and paces around the room. “Jesus, Cara, I asked you to move in with me. If I didn’t think of you as a part of my family, I never would have done that.”
“You were cold and heartless, and not the man I’d fallen in love with. I saw a side to you that scared the fuck out of me, Josh.”
He stops before the window, staring outside, and braces his hands on his hips.
“I’m sorry,” he murmurs, and then turns to look at me again. “I’m very sorry for that. I’m excellent in dealing with emergencies when it comes to the animals on the ranch, but seeing Seth hurt, and that rushing water, knowing you could have both been killed, it just destroyed me, and then . . .”
His hands shake as he pushes them through his hair. “I couldn’t find you.” He swallows, his voice quiet and rough. “I’ve never been that scared in my life. I didn’t know if something had happened to you. I couldn’t find you.”
His voice catches and he stops talking, swallows again, and shakes his head in disbelief as he leans his hips against the windowsill, and in this moment, my resolve disappears and I’ll do anything to make this right.
“I couldn’t find you. You own me, Carolina. Body and soul. I promise this will never happen again.”
I stay still, watching him carefully, taking in the handsome man who possesses my heart.
“I’m sorry too. I shouldn’t have handled it like that.”
“I need to know that you’re not going to run again. If you get scared, come to me, baby.”
“And I need to know that when we’re in a crisis again that I can depend on you to be the strong man that took care of me when the tree fell through my roof.”
“Who the fuck is Adam?” he suddenly asks.
“What?” I’m struck dumb, frowning at him. “I don’t know an Adam.”
He pulls his phone out of his pocket, wakes it up and brings up my text messages, and holds the phone out, showing them to me.
Cara: Meat me above.
Cara: Go Adam.
“Fucking autocorrect,” I mutter, and then start to giggle. I clap my hand over my mouth, my eyes wide and glued to his phone, and then I can’t stand it anymore, the dam bursts, and I begin laughing and laughing, holding my belly and falling back on the bed.
I let out a most unladylike snort, and that makes me laugh even harder.
“I don’t even remember,” I gasp, “what the fuck I was trying to say.”
The laughter begins to calm and I sit up and push my hair off my face, panting and wiping the tears from my eyes. When I glance at Josh, he’s grinning at me, his eyes soft and loving, and I think the storm is almost over.
He tosses the phone on the nearby dresser, pins me in his gaze, and sighs. “Come here, Cara.”
Staying where I am, I slowly shake my head back and forth and take a long, deep breath.
“No?” he asks quietly, and again I shake my head. He crosses his arms over his chest and narrows his eyes. “Come. Here.”
“Why?”
He raises his eyebrows and doesn’t answer, the dimple in his cheek still winking at me, waiting for me to do as he asks.
Finally, I stand, walk around the bed, and stop a few feet in front of him. “Now what?”
His eyes travel leisurely down my body and back up again, taking in my hair and eyes. No part of me goes untouched by his eyes.
“I can’t stay mad at you when you laugh like that,” he murmurs. “I love it when you laugh.”
“Josh?”
“Yes.”
“I love you.”
He doesn’t move.
“I really need . . .” I hate how my voice quivers as my emotions surge to the surface.
“What?”
“I really need you to hug me.”
He watches me for a long moment, then closes his eyes and exhales deeply and folds me into his arms, holding me hard and close, and I begin to cry in earnest, relieved that he’s here.
“I love you too, Cara,” he whispers in my ear.
“I’m so sorry,” I cry.
“Me too.” He kisses my head and runs his hands up and down my back.
“I thought you didn’t want me.”
“Cara, how could you think that?” His arms tighten more, as though he’s afraid I’ll run again. “After everything we’ve been though?”
“I know it’s stupid now, but it just sounded so horrible and I didn’t think to ask you who you were talking about.”
He swoops down and lifts my dress over my head and me into his arms, lays me gently against the soft sheets, and then stands up.
“You’re entirely overdressed,” I inform him with a shaky smile.
He yanks his shirt out of his jeans and strips out of it, giving me an awesome view of his muscular torso. He unfastens his belt buckle and jeans and hastily shoves them down his legs, along with his shorts, and comes back to me, completely naked.
“That’s better.”
