Luring A Lady
Page 35
"Of course not. It was beautiful." She had to sit down, really had to. It felt as though she'd jumped off a cliff and landed on her head. But he was looking at her in such a way that made her realize she'd better stay on her feet.
"The sex was good." He picked up his glass. Though he was tempted to fling it off the balcony, he only sipped. "Good sex is necessary for the body and for the state of mind. But it isn't enough for the heart. The heart needs love, and there was love last night. For both of us."
Her arms fell uselessly to her sides. "I don't know. I've never had good sex before."
He considered her over the rim of his glass. ''You were not a virgin. You were married before."
"Yes, I was married before." And the taste of that was still bitter on her tongue. "I don't want to talk-about that, Mikhail. Isn't it enough that we're good together, that I feel for you something I've never felt before? I don't want to analyze it. I just can't yet."
"You don't want to know what you feel?" That baffled him. "How can you live without knowing what's inside you?"
"It's different for me. I haven't had what you've had or done what you've done. And your emotions—they're always right there. You can see them in the way you move, the way you talk, in your eyes, in your work. Mine are… mine aren't as volatile. I need time." ,
He nearly smiled. "Do you think I'm a patient man?"
"No," she said, with feeling.
"Good. Then you'll understand that your time will be very short." He began to gather dishes. "Did this husband of yours hurt you?"
"A failed marriage hurts. Please, don't push me on that now."
"For tonight I won't." With the sky just beginning to deepen at his back, he looked at her. "Because tonight I want you only to think of me." He walked through the door, leaving her to gather the rest of the meal.
He loved her. The words swam in Sydney's mind as she picked up the basket and the flower. It wasn't possible to doubt it. She'd come to understand he was a man who said no more than he meant, and rarely less. But she couldn't know what love meant to him.
To her, it was something sweet and colorful and lasting that happened to other people. Her father had cared for her, in his erratic way. But they had only spent snatches of time together in her early childhood. After the divorce, when she'd been six, they had rarely seen each other.
And her mother. She didn't doubt her mother's affection. But she always realized it ran no deeper than any of Margerite's interests.
There had been Peter, and that had been strong and true and important. Until they had tried to love as husband and wife.
But it wasn't the love of a friend that Mikhail was offering her. Knowing it, feeling it, she was torn by twin forces of giddy happiness and utter terror.
With her mind still whirling, she walked into the kitchen to find him elbow deep in soapsuds. She set basket and bottle aside to pick up a dish towel.
"Are you angry with me?" she ventured after a moment.
"Some. More I'm puzzled by you." And hurt, but he didn't want her guilt or pity. "To be loved should make you happy, warm."
"Part of me is. The other half is afraid of moving too fast and risking spoiling what we've begun." He needed honesty, she thought. Deserved it. She tried to give him what she had. "All day today I looked forward to being here with you, being able to talk to you, to be able to share with you what had happened. To listen to you. I knew you'd make me laugh, that my heart would speed up when you kissed me." She set a dry bowl aside. "Why are you looking at me like that?"
He only shook his head. "You don't even know you're in love with me. But it's all right," he decided, and offered her the next bowl. "You will."
"You're so arrogant," she said, only half-annoyed. "I'm never sure if I admire or detest that."
"You like it very much because it makes you want to fight back."
"I suppose you think I should be flattered because you love me."
"Of course." He grinned at her. "Are you?"
Thinking it over, she stacked the second bowl in the first, then took the skillet. "I suppose. It's human nature. And you're…"
"I'm what?"
She looked up at him again, the cocky grin, the dark amused eyes, the tumble of wild hair. "You're so gorgeous."
His grin vanished when his mouth dropped open. When he managed to close it again, he pulled his hands out of the water and began to mutter.
"Are you swearing at me?" Instead of answering her, he yanked the dishcloth away from her to dry his hands. "I think I embarrassed you." Delighted, she laughed and cupped his face in her hands. "Yes, I did."
"Stop." Thoroughly frazzled, he pushed her hands away. "I can't think of the word for what I am."
"But you are gorgeous." Before he could shake her off, she wound her arms around his neck. "When I first saw you, I thought you looked like a pirate, all dark and dashing."
This time he swore in English and she only smiled.
"Maybe it's the hair," she considered, combing her fingers through it. "I used to imagine what it would be like to get my hands in it. Or the eyes. So moody, so dangerous."
His hands lowered to her hips. "I'm beginning to feel dangerous."
"Hmm. Or the mouth. It just might be the mouth." She touched hers to it, then slowly, her eyes on his, outlined its shape with her tongue. "I can't imagine there's a woman still breathing who could resist it."
"You're trying to seduce me."
She let her hands slide down, her fingers toying with his buttons. "Somebody has to." She only hoped she could do it right. "Then, of course, there's this wonderful body. The first time I saw you without a shirt, I nearly swallowed my tongue." She parted his shirt to let her hands roam over his chest. His knees nearly buckled. "Your skin was wet and glistening, and there were all these muscles." She forgot the game, seducing herself as completely as him. "So hard, and the skin so smooth. I wanted to touch, like this."
Her breath shuddered out as she pressed her ringers into his shoulders, kneading her way down his arms. When her eyes focused on his again, she saw that they were fiercely intense. Beneath her fingers, his arms were taut as steel. The words dried up in her mouth.
"The sex was good." He picked up his glass. Though he was tempted to fling it off the balcony, he only sipped. "Good sex is necessary for the body and for the state of mind. But it isn't enough for the heart. The heart needs love, and there was love last night. For both of us."
Her arms fell uselessly to her sides. "I don't know. I've never had good sex before."
He considered her over the rim of his glass. ''You were not a virgin. You were married before."
"Yes, I was married before." And the taste of that was still bitter on her tongue. "I don't want to talk-about that, Mikhail. Isn't it enough that we're good together, that I feel for you something I've never felt before? I don't want to analyze it. I just can't yet."
"You don't want to know what you feel?" That baffled him. "How can you live without knowing what's inside you?"
"It's different for me. I haven't had what you've had or done what you've done. And your emotions—they're always right there. You can see them in the way you move, the way you talk, in your eyes, in your work. Mine are… mine aren't as volatile. I need time." ,
He nearly smiled. "Do you think I'm a patient man?"
"No," she said, with feeling.
"Good. Then you'll understand that your time will be very short." He began to gather dishes. "Did this husband of yours hurt you?"
"A failed marriage hurts. Please, don't push me on that now."
"For tonight I won't." With the sky just beginning to deepen at his back, he looked at her. "Because tonight I want you only to think of me." He walked through the door, leaving her to gather the rest of the meal.
He loved her. The words swam in Sydney's mind as she picked up the basket and the flower. It wasn't possible to doubt it. She'd come to understand he was a man who said no more than he meant, and rarely less. But she couldn't know what love meant to him.
To her, it was something sweet and colorful and lasting that happened to other people. Her father had cared for her, in his erratic way. But they had only spent snatches of time together in her early childhood. After the divorce, when she'd been six, they had rarely seen each other.
And her mother. She didn't doubt her mother's affection. But she always realized it ran no deeper than any of Margerite's interests.
There had been Peter, and that had been strong and true and important. Until they had tried to love as husband and wife.
But it wasn't the love of a friend that Mikhail was offering her. Knowing it, feeling it, she was torn by twin forces of giddy happiness and utter terror.
With her mind still whirling, she walked into the kitchen to find him elbow deep in soapsuds. She set basket and bottle aside to pick up a dish towel.
"Are you angry with me?" she ventured after a moment.
"Some. More I'm puzzled by you." And hurt, but he didn't want her guilt or pity. "To be loved should make you happy, warm."
"Part of me is. The other half is afraid of moving too fast and risking spoiling what we've begun." He needed honesty, she thought. Deserved it. She tried to give him what she had. "All day today I looked forward to being here with you, being able to talk to you, to be able to share with you what had happened. To listen to you. I knew you'd make me laugh, that my heart would speed up when you kissed me." She set a dry bowl aside. "Why are you looking at me like that?"
He only shook his head. "You don't even know you're in love with me. But it's all right," he decided, and offered her the next bowl. "You will."
"You're so arrogant," she said, only half-annoyed. "I'm never sure if I admire or detest that."
"You like it very much because it makes you want to fight back."
"I suppose you think I should be flattered because you love me."
"Of course." He grinned at her. "Are you?"
Thinking it over, she stacked the second bowl in the first, then took the skillet. "I suppose. It's human nature. And you're…"
"I'm what?"
She looked up at him again, the cocky grin, the dark amused eyes, the tumble of wild hair. "You're so gorgeous."
His grin vanished when his mouth dropped open. When he managed to close it again, he pulled his hands out of the water and began to mutter.
"Are you swearing at me?" Instead of answering her, he yanked the dishcloth away from her to dry his hands. "I think I embarrassed you." Delighted, she laughed and cupped his face in her hands. "Yes, I did."
"Stop." Thoroughly frazzled, he pushed her hands away. "I can't think of the word for what I am."
"But you are gorgeous." Before he could shake her off, she wound her arms around his neck. "When I first saw you, I thought you looked like a pirate, all dark and dashing."
This time he swore in English and she only smiled.
"Maybe it's the hair," she considered, combing her fingers through it. "I used to imagine what it would be like to get my hands in it. Or the eyes. So moody, so dangerous."
His hands lowered to her hips. "I'm beginning to feel dangerous."
"Hmm. Or the mouth. It just might be the mouth." She touched hers to it, then slowly, her eyes on his, outlined its shape with her tongue. "I can't imagine there's a woman still breathing who could resist it."
"You're trying to seduce me."
She let her hands slide down, her fingers toying with his buttons. "Somebody has to." She only hoped she could do it right. "Then, of course, there's this wonderful body. The first time I saw you without a shirt, I nearly swallowed my tongue." She parted his shirt to let her hands roam over his chest. His knees nearly buckled. "Your skin was wet and glistening, and there were all these muscles." She forgot the game, seducing herself as completely as him. "So hard, and the skin so smooth. I wanted to touch, like this."
Her breath shuddered out as she pressed her ringers into his shoulders, kneading her way down his arms. When her eyes focused on his again, she saw that they were fiercely intense. Beneath her fingers, his arms were taut as steel. The words dried up in her mouth.
