Midnight Pleasures

Part Four CHAPTER 5

An hour later, Elise still sat inside of Sterling's wagon, staring down into the basket. He was touched in the head if he thought that she would dress in nothing but transparent scarves and dance around in public. She was an adventurer, not a woman of loose moral standards.
Sterling had left, saying he had chores to attend to. Elise mopped the perspiration from her brow and glanced toward the closed wagon door. During the daylight hours, the wagon certainly heated up. There wasn't much room, although it was tall, built in similar fashion to the brightly colored caravan wagons of the Gypsies.
There was the cot, a trunk where Sterling kept his clothing. A sturdy washbasin and pitcher, which he wrapped and put away when the wagon moved, and a couple of lanterns. She wondered what else his chest held besides clothing. She would snoop if she weren't so blasted hot.
Elise smoothed her hair, rose, and brushed the wrinkles from her frock. She decided that she wouldn't hide herself away in Sterling's wagon but venture outside. A bustle of activity took place around the camp. No one took time to stop and stare as they had earlier. In the process of skinning a rabbit, Sarah Dobbs nodded to her. The woman's smelly husband worked on a wagon wheel. Elise saw Mora in the distance gathering wood.
The hustle and bustle surprised Elise. She'd heard that people like these were lazy and that that was why they preferred their roaming ways. She didn't see Sterling but noticed Dawn, the small couple's daughter, carrying a heavy bucket of water in each hand. The girl struggled with her burdens. Elise decided she would help as well. At least until she figured out her next plan of action.
She joined the girl. "Let me help you."
Dawn didn't protest. She merely shrugged and offered the bucket in her left hand. Elise took it, surprised at how heavy it was, and plodded along behind the girl. They reached a large pot and Dawn dumped her bucket.
"We'll be doing wash as soon as we get the pot filled and Mora gets a flame beneath it," Dawn said. "We may be beggars, but we're not dirty beggars, as my mother says."
Elise smiled. "Your mother seems like a very nice person."
Again the girl shrugged. "She's a dwarf, as some call them. So is my father. But as you can see, I'm not like them."
"You have the look of your mother."
Dawn glanced away. "I need to fetch more water." She left.
Elise went after her, reclaiming the empty bucket the girl had taken from her. "Since I'm at a loss as to what to do, maybe you won't mind if I follow along."
"If you wish."
They walked in silence. She felt Dawn's regard.
"I suppose your parents are normal?"
Her first instinct was to answer to the affirmative... but then, that wasn't completely true. "No. Not by society's standards, anyway. My father came from a grand family, and my mother's family was a modest one at best. My father saw her in the market at Liverpool one day, and he fell in love with her on sight. She fell in love with him that very day, as well. They married in secret, and when my father's family found out that he had wed beneath him, they disowned him."
"What does it mean to disown someone?"
"My father's family refused to acknowledge him as one of their own," Elise explained.
"Can a person do that?" Dawn's eyes widened. "Just up and disown their family?"
Elise didn't care for the intrigue she read in Dawn's expression; she liked it less when she caught sight of the girl's mother picking berries. The woman smiled fondly at her daughter, then resumed her work.
"I think it's a horrible practice," Elise said. "Love between families should be unconditional. I wasn't much younger than you are when I lost both my parents to an accident. I still miss them terribly."
They reached a small stream and Dawn dipped her bucket into the water. "At least your parents didn't look different from everyone else. When we stop to perform and I get a chance to play with other children, they laugh and tease me once they realize who my parents are."
Elise squatted beside Dawn and dipped her bucket into the water. She had reacted to the sight of Dawn's parents in a way that made her feel ashamed now. She'd seen the love shining in Iris's eyes a moment ago when the woman had looked at her daughter.
"It's the other children who should be embarrassed... to be so shallow that they only judge a person by what they first see. On the inside, your parents aren't any different from other parents. Even though I've only just met them, it is obvious to me that they love you very much."
"They do," Dawn agreed, then stood, struggling with her full bucket. "But sometimes love is not enough."
Elise glanced up at the girl. "Love is everything," she said, and realized she truly meant her words. How she longed to be loved and cherished by someone. When her uncle had agreed to Stoneham's offer for her, Elise had realized that he truly did not care about her. She felt certain that Dawn's parents would never give her in marriage to a monster solely for the sake of gold.
The girl moved away, lugging the heavy bucket toward camp. Elise stared down at her own reflection in the water. Another image appeared.
"Do you really believe that?"
Sterling gave her a start. She hadn't seen or heard his approach. "What?" she breathed, glancing at him.
"Do you really believe that love is everything?"
How long had he been listening to her conversation with Dawn? "I suppose I do," she admitted. "Don't you?"
He reached down and retrieved her bucket from the water. "Love is a curse for most. Just look at Iris and her husband, Nathan, their big hearts full of love for a girl who cannot forgive their small bodies. Few people possess the ability to love unconditionally. Nowhere on earth can you learn that lesson as well as here."
"Dawn will see what is most important," Elise insisted, rising from her crouched position next to the water. "She's young and hasn't yet learned the value of love."
He reached forward and brushed a curl from her forehead. "You are the innocent. Even an animal will turn on one of its own if it senses a weakness, something different."
Flustered by his closeness, Elise said, "People are not animals."
His silver eyes stared into hers. "There is a thin line, I think."
Since he now held her bucket, Elise started back toward camp. "Maybe you spend too much time with your wild beasts and not enough time with people. I didn't notice you working among the others."
"I took the cats out for exercise."
Elise drew up short. "You let them out?"
He laughed. "They are not as dangerous as you might believe. Both have been raised by humans. Leena is fairly harmless. Raja takes more caution. He has his moods."
A shudder skidded up her spine. "My uncle wouldn't allow me to have so much as a hound for a pet. I'm not certain I like animals... or that they would like me."
"Why don't we see?"
A hint of teasing glinted within his silver eyes. Elise couldn't very well call herself an adventurer if she backed down in the face of every challenge he issued. "All right," she agreed. "Show me your cats."
Sterling wanted to do more than show her the cats. He wanted to taste her full lips again - wanted to introduce her to the darker side of lust. She affected him strangely, had from the moment he first saw her. She was beautiful, but there was more to her than met the eye.
He'd heard her earlier conversation with Dawn. Elise had touched his heart with her innocence, with her sweetness. Something inside of him had stirred. Something so far dormant. This slip of a girl from London might be more dangerous than his cats.
They entered camp and he dumped the water he carried into the washing pot. He took Elise's hand and led her toward the animal wagon. She only allowed the contact for a moment before she snatched her hand from his.
"I cannot wear the costumes," she said as they walked. "I think you knew that when you fetched them for me."
"It's just as well. You don't belong here."
She drew up. "I don't belong with my uncle or the horrid man he would have me marry, either." Her green eyes flashed with fire. "I'm searching to find my place, and you are doing everything in your power to dissuade me."
Sterling's resolve weakened. He could talk to Philip, reason with him to let Elise come along without having to earn her way... but would that be fair to the young woman? The life she had chosen would not be easy. She might as well learn that from the beginning.
"A man, or a woman, born to the common lot has to make their place in life," he said, resuming their walk. "Life is hard, and it's unfair, and sometimes people have to do what they don't want to do. That's a lesson you're better off learning sooner rather than later if you truly plan to leave your uncle. You won't be having everything handed to you on a silver platter."
Her chin lifted. "I don't care about being wealthy, or having fine things. All I want... all I want is to be happy," she finished bravely.
Again, something stirred inside of him. He swore he heard the sound of ice cracking - the protective barrier that surrounded his heart. He stopped, staring down at her. "Even happiness has a price. That is something you'll have to fight for as well. Do you have the courage?"
"Do you?"
The question unsettled him. As innocent as she appeared, he feared Elise might see down to his dark soul when she looked at him. Happiness? How could he be happy when a curse followed him? A curse linked to his very name.
He didn't answer but turned and walked the short distance to the animal wagons. Raja greeted him with a growl. Leena merely yawned.
"They are beautiful."
Elise had been brave enough to follow but not brave enough to stand close. Which showed she had common sense, if nothing else about her seemed common.
"Yes, they are beautiful," he agreed. "But even beautiful things are not always all they appear to be on the surface. Beneath the skin, these animals are still wild." Raja rubbed against the bars of the cage and Sterling reached inside to scratch behind the tiger's ears. "I must always remember that however docile they might appear, they could turn on me at any moment. I must respect them."
"C-Could I touch one?" Elise stammered. "Pet one, the way you are doing?"
He motioned her forward. "Best to let them catch your scent first and see how they react."
She stepped up beside him. Raja sniffed at her. The tiger didn't growl, as Sterling expected, but rubbed himself against the bars. Leena, the panther, found the guest interesting enough to rise from her lounging position and join Raja in vying for attention.
"Odd," Sterling mused. "They don't usually take to strangers. Give me your hand." She slid her hand into his and Sterling guided her fingers to the tiger's fur.
"He's very soft," she whispered. "It saddens me that he must be locked inside of a cage. I wonder if he ever dreams of running free?"
"Raja cannot miss what he has never known," Sterling said, baffled that she would wonder such a thing. All the snooty misses he recalled from his youth never thought of anything, or anyone, other than themselves. "He and Leena both have lived most of their lives behind bars. Neither could survive if they were set free."
Elise pulled her hand from the cage. "I'm glad that they have you to look after them. To love them."
Sterling ruffled Leena's fur so she wouldn't feel slighted. "A person cannot love a wild animal."
A distraction suddenly drew his attention. Philip came charging into camp, riding one of the wagon horses. "Gather round!" he shouted. "The coach inn up the road has given us permission to perform for their patrons. Make ready!"