Mind Game

Page 39

Nicolas zipped up his jeans and retrieved hers, carefully shaking them out, slapping at the material to remove the dirt. “This role reversal has to stop. I’m the man and you’re the woman. Women love to hear the L-word. It’s been that way for centuries. Don’t muck up the proper order of things.”
“Is there some sort of guidebook for relationships?” she asked curiously. “I’ve never seen an actual relationship. Jesse never mentioned a girlfriend, and Milly and Bernadette never talked about men. I think they thought if they did it would upset me.”
“Why would that be?” Nicolas watched her shimmy into her jeans. There was something very feminine about the way she put on her clothes. He could watch her dress and undress forever.
“Because I’d never have a boyfriend, of course.”
“I’ve always thought that was such a stupid word. Boyfriend. Aren’t we adults? And that sounds so insipid. I’m much more than your boyfriend.”
“You are?”
He caught her hand and dragged her close to him. “You know damn well I am.” He caught the glint of humor in her eyes and laughed with her. It felt good. The last of the energy dispersed, lifting the weight from Dahlia’s shoulders.
“Just how far do you plan to take this whole relationship thing, Nicolas? Because if you’re thinking of going much further, I definitely need a manual of some kind.”
“I’m taking it all the way. You won’t need a manual, because I can supply all the answers.” He grinned at her as he started back along the path to the cabin.
Dahlia sent him a quick smile and concentrated on the sensations of what they’d just shared together. She knew how draining it was living every day with the surging energy. It could come at the most unexpected and unwanted times, simply by a brief spurt of anger or melancholy as she was feeling now. When she was with Nicolas, reality seemed to slip away, and for a few brief moments she could believe that they would be together, that she could live a seminormal life. The moment the real world intruded, truth hit her hard. Already apprehension at facing all of the men was growing with each step she took toward the cabin. She knew Nicolas thought her undisciplined, but to marshal one’s thoughts and emotions every waking minute was nearly impossible.
“How do you keep your emotions so under control, Nicolas? Even when you’re doing things that have to bother you?” She glanced up at him to make certain her question hadn’t upset him.
“I don’t do anything unless I believe it is necessary. If it’s necessary then there’s no reason for me to be bothered by it. The universe has a natural order. I do my best to flow with it and not try to control things outside of myself. The truth is, control is a myth. You can’t control another person or even an event. You can only control yourself. So that’s what I do. If it becomes necessary to go out on a mission and a job has to be done, I do it. There’s no reason to complicate it with unnecessary emotion.”
“And you can do that?” Some of what he said made sense, but she had to admit some of it bothered her. “If you’d been sent here to kill me would you have done it?”
“I wouldn’t have come unless someone gave me a damned good reason, Dahlia. You’ve never done anything to warrant a death sentence.”
She rubbed at her forehead where the aftermath of her headache still lingered. “I’m glad I don’t have to make those decisions. I suppose there’s a sort of safety in having the psychic abilities I have. I can’t deliberately cause harm to someone without severe, immediate retribution. I know they wanted to train me as a weapon, but I couldn’t do all of the things necessary. For all the problems mine might cause, I guess it saved me from having to make decisions I might not want to make.”
“Did you enjoy learning martial arts?”
“Yes.” Dahlia could hear the sound of hammers and saws ringing through the bayou as they got closer to the cabin. Her stomach tightened. She drew a deep, steadying breath and continued walking with him as if she didn’t hear a thing.
“Good. I have a beautiful dojo in my home. You’ll enjoy it.”
“For some reason, I had the impression all of you stayed with Lily at her house.”
“We do temporarily. She was generous enough to open her home. Whitney added special walls to help keep out sound and better protect Lily. We train there, conducting exercises to strengthen the barriers in order to permit us to stay out in the world without anchors for longer periods of time. We all have our own homes. Mine is in California up in the mountains. I have several acres, and the gardens are beautiful. I have a crew maintaining the property while I’m gone.”
She heard the pride in his voice. He cared about his home. “Tell me about the house.”
“It’s a mixture of East and West. The Japanese design is very open and gives it a sense of tranquility. I feel peace when I’m there. I enjoy working with plants, and fortunately, the weather is mild enough that the gardens stay green nearly year round. You can hear the sound of water running in the creek, and we incorporated a small natural waterfall and pool into the gardens. I have beds of herbs and healing plants as well.” He sent her a quick grin. “I was optimistic I’d learn to heal.”
They were close enough to the cabin that Dahlia could hear the sounds of the men’s voices as they good-naturedly ribbed one another back and forth. She stopped on the worn trail to look up at Nicolas. The sun cast streaks of light through the midnight black hair and kissed his skin with bronze so that he seemed almost glowing to her. “I can picture you working in your garden. Funny that I never even considered it before. You told me about both of your grandfathers, but I think I was only seeing parts of you, not putting you together as a whole.” She slipped her arms around his waist and tilted her head up to his. “I want you to kiss me again so I’m thinking about that when we see the others instead of the humiliation of setting Gator’s house on fire.”
Nicolas didn’t hesitate. He caught the back of her head in the palm of his hand and lowered his mouth to hers. Each time he kissed her the way she tasted, the melting of their bodies, always moved him so unexpectedly. He doubted if he would ever get used to the feel and taste of her. She had crawled inside of him and there was no way to get her out. He started out kissing her gently, tenderly, but in the end he was a starving man, craving more, kissing her over and over.
“Hey!” Gator’s voice drew them apart. “Nico, you get your hands off cha d’bebe and mind your manners.”
Dahlia drew away, her face coloring in spite of her resolve not to let them embarrass her further. She was definitely not Gator’s sweet baby. The man could curl a woman’s toes just with his smooth voice. And he knew it too.
“I think your bebe made the first move,” Sam called from the corner of the house. He had a saw in his hands and was grinning at them.
Gator’s hand went to his heart. “Say it’s not true, ma cher cherie. You have not allowed this corrupter of women to tempt you, have you?”
Dahlia raised her eyebrow and looked up at Nicolas. Nothing seemed to affect him, not being caught kissing her and certainly not their teasing. He looked as inscrutable and as composed as ever. “Do you corrupt women?”
“That’s Gator’s department. The ladies always go for him. He has that bad boy look and the Cajun accent, and he speaks French and they all go wild.”
Dahlia leaned back against Nicolas, accepting the protection his body offered, not because she needed it, but because she sensed he did. Nicolas had no more experience in relationships than she did, and he was uncomfortable with the easy camaraderie the other GhostWalkers were attempting to establish with her. She realized he wasn’t nearly as sure of himself and of her as he let on. “I can see that about Gator. He’s smooth when he dishes out the bull, you know what I mean?” She winked up at Nicolas.
Nicolas felt his heart do a curious somersault. Dahlia created an intimacy with him, a bond, and he knew she did it for him, not for her. He thought there was something remarkable about small, unexpected things when someone did them for him. He had been young when he lost his Lakota grandfather, and his Japanese grandfather had rarely been demonstrative, but Nicolas remembered the impact when he would do some small thing to show affection.
He cleared his throat. “I know exactly what you mean.”
Gator threw back his head and laughed. “She’s a good one, that woman. You hang onto her, Nico.”
“I intend to,” Nicolas answered.
“Gator,” Dahlia gestured toward the cabin. “I’m sorry I set your house on fire. Things like that happen a lot around me.”
“A little fire is nothing to worry about, ’tite soeur. We fixed it right up.” His grin turned mischievous. “I saw sparks in the air over by the old pond. I was most worried the two of you were having a bit of fight, but now I think it was something altogether different.”
Dahlia couldn’t help but laugh. It wasn’t just his outrageous behavior, but his easygoing attitude and charming accent. And he had referred to her as little sister. Part of her wanted to bask in that.
Nicolas was obviously reading her thoughts. Gator is anything but easygoing in a fight, Dahlia. He’s one of the best we have. All of them are. Never underestimate him.
I wasn’t worried. I just think he’s . . . she hesitated, substituted, cute.
Cute? You think he’s cute? What’s cute about him?
She loved the teasing note in his voice. Nicolas was so much more relaxed around her now. They were actually reaching a point where they seemed to fit with one another. He could tease her about another man and the earlier jealousy didn’t flare up. Well, yes. He’s got that smile, that really bad boy smile, and a great backside.
On page eighty of the relationship manual, it clearly states you cannot look at another man’s backside, especially if you think it’s great.
Her laughter floated out over the bayou. Great tall herons flapped their wings and continued walking on their stilt-like legs through the reeds. Several frogs croaked, and both Kaden and Ian stuck their heads around the corner.
Kaden gave her a little salute. “I’m glad to see you’re feeling much better.”
“Much, thank you, although I’m a bit embarrassed that I set Gator’s house on fire.”
“I told you there was no need to be upset, ma cher,” Gator said. “We wouldn’t want the men to be getting bored. I put them to work.”
“Still, I hate the loss of control,” Dahlia said, determined to try to fit in with the GhostWalkers. If she was the same as they were, and they could understand the complications facing her and maybe find a way to make her life better, she was going to give it her all. “I’ve worked very hard for as long as I can remember and yet I’m still making childish mistakes. Part of it is my own temper.”
Nicolas ruffled her hair, wishing he could find the right words to say to comfort her. “You’re too hard on yourself. We’re all learning about this. Did you ever think one of the other missing girls might be out there somewhere alone, not knowing what happened to her? Maybe thinking she’s insane? The more we find out what you can and can’t do, the better it is for all of us. Experiments are risky and there are mistakes made, but they’re necessary. You have to think of being around the GhostWalkers as an experiment. None of us would ever condemn a mistake.”
The men gaped at Nicolas. “That’s the most I’ve heard him say in three years,” Sam said. He turned to the others. “You ever hear him talk that much?”
“I wasn’t sure he could talk,” Tucker Addison replied straight-faced.
“He talks,” Dahlia said defensively.
“Beggin your pardon, ma’am, but he’s just plain antisocial,” Sam pointed out. “Always has been, always will be.”