Mine to Have
Page 50
“Jane?”
He frowned at the note of concern he heard in Ryan’s voice. Alerac glanced back and saw Jane being cradled in her brother’s arms.
Jane’s eyes were closed, her long lashes dark against her pale cheeks.
“I think she fainted,” Ryan muttered. He shook her gently. “Jane?”
“Vampires faint?” Zoe asked. “Here I thought blood-suckers were tougher than that.” But a thread of concern had entered her voice, too.
Fear uncurled within Alerac. Fear, when he’d forced that emotion away for so long. But Jane seemed to be unlocking all of his emotions. The good and the bad. Helpless, he went back to her.
Had Jane fainted because she realized she was bound to a monster? To a man with a heart just as dark as Lorcan’s?
He took her from Ryan. “Jane?”
She didn’t stir.
She had blood on her clothes. On her skin.
“I’ll take care of her,” he said. He would. Always.
He cast a hard stare around the area. The witch was dead. Dammit, he’d needed her. He’d had plans for her. Now she was gone. Maybe I can find another witch. But her kind wasn’t exactly thick on the ground, especially the powerful witches. “Take care of her,” he ordered his men as he inclined his head toward the woman’s still body.
Ryan glanced over at her bloody form. “She had no magic to help us.”
“She didn’t deserve to die!” From Zoe. Her cheeks were flushed. “She thought she was just getting to live, then Liam took that all away! She had hope, and he destroyed it.”
Liam had taken much away from them.
No more.
Alerac turned and began to carry his precious burden up the stairs.
“What about Lorcan?” Ryan shouted after him.
Alerac paused. Until he found a way to break the link between Jane and Lorcan, there was nothing that could be done. “He lives.” That was all he could say. “No one goes after him without my express command.” Because any attack would hurt Jane, and that he could not allow. “If anyone catches his scent on our land, alert me immediately.”
He left the others and carried Jane into the bathroom upstairs. The shower there was huge, easily big enough to accommodate them both.
“Jane?” Why hadn’t her eyes opened?
He held her with one arm, positioning her against the glass door of the shower. He stripped her, wanting that blood-stained clothing away from her delicate skin.
Her lashes began to flutter.
He stilled at once. “I’m just taking care of you.” Her fear was the last thing he wanted.
Jane’s eyes opened fully. “He was crazy.”
Alerac shook his head.
“I-I saw it. In his memories. The more blood he took, the more darkness ate away at him. Liam tried to hold on to his sanity, for so long, but he knew he was losing the battle.”
“He never said…” Alerac began.
“His father went mad, didn’t he?”
Alerac nodded. Some werewolves could turn feral. The most dangerous of their kind.
“He saw it happen,” Jane whispered. Her hands rose and curled around Alerac’s shoulders. “He saw it, and so did I. He knew the same fate was happening to him, and he thought that if he could just become immortal, like you, he’d have a different fate.”
The drumming of Alerac’s heart seemed to echo in his ears. “He drank vampire blood for me. To help me search for you. To avenge our pack.” From the vampire attack that had nearly wiped them out so long ago. Lorcan’s attack.
“No.” Jane shook her head as her fingers tightened around his shoulders. “He did it for himself. Because he thought the blood would make him strong enough to fight the urges he had, but, after a while, it just made everything worse.”
If Liam had been sick, Alerac should have known.
“He loved you,” Jane whispered. “And he hated you.”
His jaw locked. “You only had a few sips of his blood. You can’t know all of this.” She couldn’t know it. Jane hadn’t even gotten Alerac’s memories until she’d slept.
A faint line was between her brows. “I think I’m stronger. Your blood made me stronger. Because I could see everything. From the first drop of blood that hit my tongue, I could see.”
He wasn’t sure why, but Alerac felt like those words were a warning. “Then maybe you should drink from me again. That way, you can fully see the monster before you.” What the hell was he saying? He didn’t want her to see him that way.
Did he?
Alerac stepped away from her. He’d stripped her down to her bra and underwear. He tried not to notice the delicate temptation of her body. Failed.
He leaned into the shower and yanked on the water. Then he stripped without looking at her.
He put his hands on the shower’s glass door. “Why did you faint?” Because of what I am?
“His memories were too much. I couldn’t shut them out any other way, so I guess I just shut down.”
Alerac nodded. But he knew her words weren’t the total truth. “You were afraid of me.”
“Alerac…”
With a twisted smile, he glanced over at her. “You still are.”
He climbed into the shower, and the rushing water poured over him.
The blood washed away. If only it were so easy to wash all the sins from his soul.
Then Jane was there. Naked, entering the shower with him. The water slickened her skin. Steam floated in the air around them.
“I am afraid of you,” Jane confessed.
She was trying to break him.
“And I’m afraid of myself. Since I’ve met you, I’ve changed.” Her body brushed against him.
If the woman was so scared, she needed to be stepping back. Not getting closer. Because in another few seconds, he’d be grabbing her.
He didn’t plan to let go.
“I’m not the same woman you found in that bar. I-I still don’t remember Keira, not really. But I’ve seen her, through your eyes.” Her lips pressed together. “It’s more than that, though. I’m stronger than I realized. You make me strong.”
That was bullshit. She’d always been strong. Someone weak didn’t trade her life for another’s.
“I know that I’m going to keep changing. I’m not going to be fully Jane, not fully Keira, but something in the middle. That scares me.” Then she made a mistake.
He frowned at the note of concern he heard in Ryan’s voice. Alerac glanced back and saw Jane being cradled in her brother’s arms.
Jane’s eyes were closed, her long lashes dark against her pale cheeks.
“I think she fainted,” Ryan muttered. He shook her gently. “Jane?”
“Vampires faint?” Zoe asked. “Here I thought blood-suckers were tougher than that.” But a thread of concern had entered her voice, too.
Fear uncurled within Alerac. Fear, when he’d forced that emotion away for so long. But Jane seemed to be unlocking all of his emotions. The good and the bad. Helpless, he went back to her.
Had Jane fainted because she realized she was bound to a monster? To a man with a heart just as dark as Lorcan’s?
He took her from Ryan. “Jane?”
She didn’t stir.
She had blood on her clothes. On her skin.
“I’ll take care of her,” he said. He would. Always.
He cast a hard stare around the area. The witch was dead. Dammit, he’d needed her. He’d had plans for her. Now she was gone. Maybe I can find another witch. But her kind wasn’t exactly thick on the ground, especially the powerful witches. “Take care of her,” he ordered his men as he inclined his head toward the woman’s still body.
Ryan glanced over at her bloody form. “She had no magic to help us.”
“She didn’t deserve to die!” From Zoe. Her cheeks were flushed. “She thought she was just getting to live, then Liam took that all away! She had hope, and he destroyed it.”
Liam had taken much away from them.
No more.
Alerac turned and began to carry his precious burden up the stairs.
“What about Lorcan?” Ryan shouted after him.
Alerac paused. Until he found a way to break the link between Jane and Lorcan, there was nothing that could be done. “He lives.” That was all he could say. “No one goes after him without my express command.” Because any attack would hurt Jane, and that he could not allow. “If anyone catches his scent on our land, alert me immediately.”
He left the others and carried Jane into the bathroom upstairs. The shower there was huge, easily big enough to accommodate them both.
“Jane?” Why hadn’t her eyes opened?
He held her with one arm, positioning her against the glass door of the shower. He stripped her, wanting that blood-stained clothing away from her delicate skin.
Her lashes began to flutter.
He stilled at once. “I’m just taking care of you.” Her fear was the last thing he wanted.
Jane’s eyes opened fully. “He was crazy.”
Alerac shook his head.
“I-I saw it. In his memories. The more blood he took, the more darkness ate away at him. Liam tried to hold on to his sanity, for so long, but he knew he was losing the battle.”
“He never said…” Alerac began.
“His father went mad, didn’t he?”
Alerac nodded. Some werewolves could turn feral. The most dangerous of their kind.
“He saw it happen,” Jane whispered. Her hands rose and curled around Alerac’s shoulders. “He saw it, and so did I. He knew the same fate was happening to him, and he thought that if he could just become immortal, like you, he’d have a different fate.”
The drumming of Alerac’s heart seemed to echo in his ears. “He drank vampire blood for me. To help me search for you. To avenge our pack.” From the vampire attack that had nearly wiped them out so long ago. Lorcan’s attack.
“No.” Jane shook her head as her fingers tightened around his shoulders. “He did it for himself. Because he thought the blood would make him strong enough to fight the urges he had, but, after a while, it just made everything worse.”
If Liam had been sick, Alerac should have known.
“He loved you,” Jane whispered. “And he hated you.”
His jaw locked. “You only had a few sips of his blood. You can’t know all of this.” She couldn’t know it. Jane hadn’t even gotten Alerac’s memories until she’d slept.
A faint line was between her brows. “I think I’m stronger. Your blood made me stronger. Because I could see everything. From the first drop of blood that hit my tongue, I could see.”
He wasn’t sure why, but Alerac felt like those words were a warning. “Then maybe you should drink from me again. That way, you can fully see the monster before you.” What the hell was he saying? He didn’t want her to see him that way.
Did he?
Alerac stepped away from her. He’d stripped her down to her bra and underwear. He tried not to notice the delicate temptation of her body. Failed.
He leaned into the shower and yanked on the water. Then he stripped without looking at her.
He put his hands on the shower’s glass door. “Why did you faint?” Because of what I am?
“His memories were too much. I couldn’t shut them out any other way, so I guess I just shut down.”
Alerac nodded. But he knew her words weren’t the total truth. “You were afraid of me.”
“Alerac…”
With a twisted smile, he glanced over at her. “You still are.”
He climbed into the shower, and the rushing water poured over him.
The blood washed away. If only it were so easy to wash all the sins from his soul.
Then Jane was there. Naked, entering the shower with him. The water slickened her skin. Steam floated in the air around them.
“I am afraid of you,” Jane confessed.
She was trying to break him.
“And I’m afraid of myself. Since I’ve met you, I’ve changed.” Her body brushed against him.
If the woman was so scared, she needed to be stepping back. Not getting closer. Because in another few seconds, he’d be grabbing her.
He didn’t plan to let go.
“I’m not the same woman you found in that bar. I-I still don’t remember Keira, not really. But I’ve seen her, through your eyes.” Her lips pressed together. “It’s more than that, though. I’m stronger than I realized. You make me strong.”
That was bullshit. She’d always been strong. Someone weak didn’t trade her life for another’s.
“I know that I’m going to keep changing. I’m not going to be fully Jane, not fully Keira, but something in the middle. That scares me.” Then she made a mistake.
