More Than This
Page 34
We only walk a few feet before I hear my name being called. I slowly let go of Kayla and Julie and turn around to see Aunt Jenna and Uncle Jim walking over to us. Julie gives them both a hug, and I shake hands with my uncle and kiss my aunt on the cheek. She steps back and sees Kayla. She notices my taking Kayla’s hand and smiles.
“Aunt Jenna, Uncle Jim . . . This is Mikayla.” I make the introductions.
“Oh!” Aunt Jenna’s eyes widen slightly. “Oh, Mikayla, Nathan’s told me so much about you.” Then to me she says, “I didn’t realize she was your—”
I feel Kayla tense next to me and I interrupt my aunt.
“Yeah, she’s my Mikayla.” I smile, looking at Kayla, and I know I’ve said the right thing because she beams at me. Holding on to my arm, she quietly tells them, “It’s a pleasure to meet you both.”
“They’re the aunt and uncle I stayed with when I came back for six months from Australia. Uncle Jim here is the reason I have so many offers on the table.”
Uncle Jim laughs, shaking his head. “Jesus, kid, you’ve got a big head.”
“I’m kind of a big deal, didn’t you know?” I joke. Kayla laughs next to me. I love hearing her laugh.
After the small talk is over, we say our good-byes. As we’re heading out the exit, Julie gasps, “I have to go to the pharmacy! I need tampons.” I stop in my tracks. “Just kidding, Jacarb!” Julie cries and races outside. Kayla kisses my cheek.
“I’m so ready to get out of this place,” I tell her.
I haven’t been able to get the sexy underwear out of my mind. It’s close to midnight, and it’s all I can think about. As soon as we got home, Kayla holed herself up in her room. She didn’t even come down for dinner, saying she had job applications to fill out and a bunch of research to do.
I climb out my window and knock on hers. She opens the curtains after a few seconds and lifts the window. I pull myself in and sit down on her bed.
She stays in front of the window. “What’s up, Jake?” she asks. It’s dark in the room, so I can’t see her face.
“Nothing . . . I was just thinking about you.”
“Oh.” She hasn’t moved from her spot. She’s as far from me as physically possible.
“Did something happen?” I ask. Something is definitely wrong. She hasn’t been the same since we left the mall.
“No. Why would you say that?”
“Well, normally when I’m around, you’re always right next to me, if not on me . . . Now you’re all the way over there.” I try to sound concerned, but it comes out sounding more pissed off than anything.
“Jesus Christ, Jake. Sorry I’m not jumping your bones 24/7.” She raises her voice.
Something is definitely up, and I have no clue what’s going on. I try to calm down before I open my mouth again, because if I keep talking I’ll say something stupid. I really don’t want to do that.
“Kayla, if something’s going on, you’d tell me, right?” I move to switch on the lamp on her nightstand so I can see her face. Her cheeks are all red, her nose is running, and her eyes are bloodshot.
Before I can stand up, she saunters over to me. She stands between my legs and places her hands on my shoulders. My arms instinctively go to her waist. I look up at her. “I’m okay, Jake,” she says. “I’ve just had a bad evening. I promise. I’m sorry.”
I lean my head on her stomach. I kind of feel like a dick. “Want me to stay tonight? I can come back soon—not like anyone would really care.” I wish I knew how to help her.
She shakes her head.
Something is definitely up.
I leave her alone in her room and hope that tomorrow will be a better day.
TWENTY-FIVE
MIKAYLA
“Micky!”
I drop what I’m holding. It falls to the floor.
I look up to see Logan walking toward me.
He stops in front of me. He looks at my face, the floor, then the shelf I’m standing next to. Then he does it again.
All this happens in about two seconds.
To me, it feels like years.
From the moment I heard my name called, a thousand emotions came over me—panic, regret, sadness, confusion, humiliation, anger, disappointment . . .
The biggest one, though, was fear.
I was scared shitless.
Logan bends over and picks it up. He stares at it for a second or a minute—a hundred fucking years. It doesn’t matter.
It will still be a pregnancy test.
As he puts the item back on the shelf, I feel tears form in my eyes. A sob escapes me, and I fold over. He wraps me in his arms and leads me outside, whispering comforting words. He opens the door of his car for me, and I get in.
Once he’s settled in the driver’s seat, he puts the key in the ignition but doesn’t turn it.
Moments of silence pass.
Then he faces me. “You’re pregnant?”
“I don’t know.” It’s barely a whisper.
“So you haven’t taken the test yet?”
“No.” I start to cry. “Please, Logan. You can’t tell anybody about this. No one—especially Jake. Please.”
“Mikayla, I wouldn’t. It’s not my story to tell.” He tries to smile, but he doesn’t quite follow through.
The car is silent apart from my sobs. I didn’t even think about the possibility—not for a second—until Julie joked about tampons yesterday. James and I were sexually active in the weeks leading up to prom night. I was meticulous about taking the pill. It’s 99 percent effective, but I’m two weeks late. I didn’t even notice. How could I be so stupid? Nothing scares me more than the thought of being a teen mom. What the fuck am I going to do?
“My dad’s a doctor,” Logan finally says. “I can take you to him now, just to be sure. It’d be confidential by law. No one will know, I promise.”
I nod and look out the window. He starts the car and reverses out of the spot.
Dr. Matthews is the complete opposite of Logan. He’s gentle and soft-spoken, with a tiny build, slight comb-over, and glasses. He’s heard about the situation with my family. I see the sympathy in his eyes, and I know it’s genuine.
A urine and blood test later, I’m actually able to breathe again. They took a blood test just to double-check, but all signs point to negative. Apparently, my body just kind of flaked out on me. Dr. Matthews says that skipping cycles or being late is common when the body is under a lot of stress or trauma.
“Aunt Jenna, Uncle Jim . . . This is Mikayla.” I make the introductions.
“Oh!” Aunt Jenna’s eyes widen slightly. “Oh, Mikayla, Nathan’s told me so much about you.” Then to me she says, “I didn’t realize she was your—”
I feel Kayla tense next to me and I interrupt my aunt.
“Yeah, she’s my Mikayla.” I smile, looking at Kayla, and I know I’ve said the right thing because she beams at me. Holding on to my arm, she quietly tells them, “It’s a pleasure to meet you both.”
“They’re the aunt and uncle I stayed with when I came back for six months from Australia. Uncle Jim here is the reason I have so many offers on the table.”
Uncle Jim laughs, shaking his head. “Jesus, kid, you’ve got a big head.”
“I’m kind of a big deal, didn’t you know?” I joke. Kayla laughs next to me. I love hearing her laugh.
After the small talk is over, we say our good-byes. As we’re heading out the exit, Julie gasps, “I have to go to the pharmacy! I need tampons.” I stop in my tracks. “Just kidding, Jacarb!” Julie cries and races outside. Kayla kisses my cheek.
“I’m so ready to get out of this place,” I tell her.
I haven’t been able to get the sexy underwear out of my mind. It’s close to midnight, and it’s all I can think about. As soon as we got home, Kayla holed herself up in her room. She didn’t even come down for dinner, saying she had job applications to fill out and a bunch of research to do.
I climb out my window and knock on hers. She opens the curtains after a few seconds and lifts the window. I pull myself in and sit down on her bed.
She stays in front of the window. “What’s up, Jake?” she asks. It’s dark in the room, so I can’t see her face.
“Nothing . . . I was just thinking about you.”
“Oh.” She hasn’t moved from her spot. She’s as far from me as physically possible.
“Did something happen?” I ask. Something is definitely wrong. She hasn’t been the same since we left the mall.
“No. Why would you say that?”
“Well, normally when I’m around, you’re always right next to me, if not on me . . . Now you’re all the way over there.” I try to sound concerned, but it comes out sounding more pissed off than anything.
“Jesus Christ, Jake. Sorry I’m not jumping your bones 24/7.” She raises her voice.
Something is definitely up, and I have no clue what’s going on. I try to calm down before I open my mouth again, because if I keep talking I’ll say something stupid. I really don’t want to do that.
“Kayla, if something’s going on, you’d tell me, right?” I move to switch on the lamp on her nightstand so I can see her face. Her cheeks are all red, her nose is running, and her eyes are bloodshot.
Before I can stand up, she saunters over to me. She stands between my legs and places her hands on my shoulders. My arms instinctively go to her waist. I look up at her. “I’m okay, Jake,” she says. “I’ve just had a bad evening. I promise. I’m sorry.”
I lean my head on her stomach. I kind of feel like a dick. “Want me to stay tonight? I can come back soon—not like anyone would really care.” I wish I knew how to help her.
She shakes her head.
Something is definitely up.
I leave her alone in her room and hope that tomorrow will be a better day.
TWENTY-FIVE
MIKAYLA
“Micky!”
I drop what I’m holding. It falls to the floor.
I look up to see Logan walking toward me.
He stops in front of me. He looks at my face, the floor, then the shelf I’m standing next to. Then he does it again.
All this happens in about two seconds.
To me, it feels like years.
From the moment I heard my name called, a thousand emotions came over me—panic, regret, sadness, confusion, humiliation, anger, disappointment . . .
The biggest one, though, was fear.
I was scared shitless.
Logan bends over and picks it up. He stares at it for a second or a minute—a hundred fucking years. It doesn’t matter.
It will still be a pregnancy test.
As he puts the item back on the shelf, I feel tears form in my eyes. A sob escapes me, and I fold over. He wraps me in his arms and leads me outside, whispering comforting words. He opens the door of his car for me, and I get in.
Once he’s settled in the driver’s seat, he puts the key in the ignition but doesn’t turn it.
Moments of silence pass.
Then he faces me. “You’re pregnant?”
“I don’t know.” It’s barely a whisper.
“So you haven’t taken the test yet?”
“No.” I start to cry. “Please, Logan. You can’t tell anybody about this. No one—especially Jake. Please.”
“Mikayla, I wouldn’t. It’s not my story to tell.” He tries to smile, but he doesn’t quite follow through.
The car is silent apart from my sobs. I didn’t even think about the possibility—not for a second—until Julie joked about tampons yesterday. James and I were sexually active in the weeks leading up to prom night. I was meticulous about taking the pill. It’s 99 percent effective, but I’m two weeks late. I didn’t even notice. How could I be so stupid? Nothing scares me more than the thought of being a teen mom. What the fuck am I going to do?
“My dad’s a doctor,” Logan finally says. “I can take you to him now, just to be sure. It’d be confidential by law. No one will know, I promise.”
I nod and look out the window. He starts the car and reverses out of the spot.
Dr. Matthews is the complete opposite of Logan. He’s gentle and soft-spoken, with a tiny build, slight comb-over, and glasses. He’s heard about the situation with my family. I see the sympathy in his eyes, and I know it’s genuine.
A urine and blood test later, I’m actually able to breathe again. They took a blood test just to double-check, but all signs point to negative. Apparently, my body just kind of flaked out on me. Dr. Matthews says that skipping cycles or being late is common when the body is under a lot of stress or trauma.
