Much Ado About Vampires

Chapter Seventeen

"You ever have one of those days when everything just keeps getting worse?" I asked Pia from where we stood huddled together behind the solid wall made up of two large, angry vampires.
"I think I'm having one now," she answered, casting a worried look over to the table where Sally sat with composed grace, her eyes bright with excitement as she watched Brother Ailwin and about twenty men in monk outfits pour into the room.
"How come Brother Ailwin gets to wear modern clothes while they have to wear the brown robes? " I asked Pia in a whisper.
"Dunno. But they have swords and he doesn't, so that balances things out, don't you think?"
"Hmm." I slid a glance to the side. The two vamps from the Moravian Council stood leaning against the wall, watching everything, but making no attempt to grab either Alec or me.
"At last I have found where you cower and attempt to hide from me," Brother Ailwin announced in a bossy voice as he marched into the room, trailed by two lines of sword-bearing monks. "The two Dark Ones will not keep me from you this time, Tool."
"I really hate being called that," I said to no one in particular.
"You will be mine, and with you, I will - " Brother Ailwin's eyes, which had been on me, widened as he glanced toward Sally. Both Ulfur and Diamond were next to her, and I knew the moment he realized that they were the other two Tools. His jaw dropped down a good couple of inches for the count of ten; then he gave a triumphant crow and pointed at them. "The three Tools of Bael! Together! God has indeed cast his blessings upon me, for with the three Tools, I will rule the mortal and immortal worlds! Brothers, you are witnessing an historic event! With the joining of the three Tools of Bael, I will become the most powerful being to ever exist! A new age is dawning, the age of the lich, and as its leader - "
"Christ, don't you ever shut up?" Alec interrupted, and, to my utter amazement, pulled out a gun and shot Brother Ailwin.
Alec! I yelled.
Hmm?
You shot him!
Brother Ailwin looked down at his chest in surprise. As he was clad in a navy suit and pale blue shirt, the dark red stain that blossomed across his middle was clearly visible. He touched a hand to it, his expression full of disbelief as he examined the red on his fingers. "I've been shot."
Yes, I did.
My mind spun around like a hamster wheel for a few seconds. Oh. Well done. Although where did you get the gun?
Kristoff gave it to me. He thought we might need it.
"That is a gun. I've been shot. With a bullet," Brother Ailwin said, turning to show the blood on his fingers to his mini-army. The monks looked back at him in confusion. "The Dark One shot me."
"Liches," Sally said in an aside to Diamond.
"They always state the obvious," Diamond added, and nodded.
How come you didn't shoot the vamps?
It wouldn't have done anything but make them angry.
Brother Ailwin evidently got over his stupefaction, for he straightened up and glared at Alec. "You will die for that - "
Alec shot him again, this time in the leg. Brother Ailwin lurched to the side, his leg buckling.
"You can't kill a lichmaster, can you? " I asked, watching as Brother Ailwin stared for a moment at his leg.
"No, but I can put him out of commission for a bit," Alec answered, his mind filled with grim determination to keep me safe. "Kristoff?"
Love swelled within me. I couldn't deny it any longer - it was love that I felt for him, this bloodsucking fiend, this nightwalker, this utterly adorable, sexier-than-sin man who I knew would literally give up his life to keep me safe.
With a sigh, Kristoff pulled out a small gun.
"This is intolerable!" Brother Ailwin yelled. "I will not be - "
Kristoff shot him in the other leg.
"Stop that!" Ailwin screamed as he fell to the ground. "Stop shooting me! I will not be treated in this manner! I am a powerful lichmaster, and the wielder of the three Tools of Bael, and - oh, bloody hell, I've lost the feeling in my left leg. Brother Anton, assist me to a chair so that I might destroy those two Dark Ones."
"This is almost as good as watching the Black Knight scene from Monty Python and the Holy Grail, but I think we should probably not wait around until he's nothing but a torso," I suggested with a wary look at the two vampires lounging against the wall, watching the scene with identical expressions of polite interest.
"'Tis but a flesh wound," Pia quoted, nodding.
"Get them!" Brother Ailwin said, waving toward us as one of the monks hefted him up and set him less than gently down on a mangled remains of what was once probably a quite pretty dining chair.
The other nineteen monks started toward us, but paused when Alec and Kristoff leveled their guns. "We have enough bullets to shatter the bones in all your legs," Alec told the monk army. "You won't make it ten feet."
The monks looked at the two vampires holding guns, down at their swords, then over to Brother Ailwin before turning back to our little group.
Alec smiled.
The monks, as a group, turned and in perfect formation marched out of the door.
"Wait!" Brother Ailwin screeched, glaring furiously at them. "I did not order - you cannot leave now, not when I'm about to claim the greatest victory known to lichkind! I demand that you come back here! I demand that you destroy the Dark Ones! What's a few shattered thighbones when it comes to . . . damnation! You cowards! Come back here! "
"I told you that a lich army was a bad idea, if you recall," Sally said, getting to her feet as two women burst into the room. "They just have no backbone, any of them, and collectively, they're sponges. But I'm sure you see the wisdom of my advice now, don't you, Ailwin? Oh dear, your blood is going to stain the floor if it keeps up like that. You really should stanch the flow of it. Jane, my dear, how lovely to see you again. Is that the new T-shirt design? You must send me a gross or two, and I'll order my minions to wear them."
"You!" Brother Ailwin spit, glaring up at Jane as she stopped next to him, giving him a confused look. "I might have known you'd find out about the Tools. No, no, Brother Anton, not that leg, you fool, this one. The one that's bleeding all over the place. Wrap it tight so I can stand up long enough to wield the Tools."
"What . . . the Tools?" Jane looked even more confused as she glanced around the room. "Hello, everyone. Er . . . is this a Dark One convention or something? "
"Tools as in plural?" asked Eleanor, who stood with Jane in matching Liches rule, others drool, especially revenants T-shirts. She frowned at me for a moment before narrowing her eyes on Sally. "I could swear I know you."
Sally batted her lashes and gave a little smile and shrug, but said nothing.
Great, just what we need, Brother Ailwin clueing in Jane as to what we are, and how to use us. Can you shoot him again? I asked Alec.
I would gladly, but it would serve no purpose. I simply wanted to frighten away his monks and disable him, albeit temporarily. Jane, I believe, will pose us no threat.
I caught the whisper of a thought that Eleanor might be an entirely different subject, but wasn't sure if that was just my inner devil being snarky, or something he was truly worried about.
"You have the Tools of Bael?" Jane asked Brother Ailwin.
He looked furious with himself, and shoved away the poor monk who was trying to bind up his left leg. "I do. You may bow down before me now, before the rush to curry my favor."
"Oh, for the love of - no one has the Tools," I couldn't help but say, moving around to Alec's side.
Beloved, please stand behind me, so that I can protect you.
Pfft. I'm a frickin' Tool. I can protect you, I answered with bravado.
He sighed into his mind, and pulled me up against him, which I had to admit was what I wanted all along. Just the feel of him, so warm and solid, and bristling with indignation, made my inner self sigh with happiness.
Dammit, Alec, I've gone and fallen in love with you, I told him.
He almost fell over. You what?
You heard me.
His eyes glittered with a combination of ire and desire, so green they almost glowed. "And you pick now to tell me? This exact moment?" He waved his gun toward the liches. "You couldn't wait until we were alone?"
"Tell you what?" Pia asked.
Kristoff shot her a look.
"Oh. That." She giggled and gave me a thumbs-up. "I'm so happy for you both. You'll have to invite us to the wedding. Kristoff didn't want to marry me, because he said it was a human thing, and meaningless to Dark Ones, but in the end, he gave in, because my family would have gutted him if he didn't."
Kristoff rolled his eyes, and murmured something in her ear. She giggled again.
I eyed Alec.
"I will be happy to marry you in a mortal ceremony," he answered the look.
"In a church? " I asked. "My family is like Pia's - they're big on weddings."
"In a church," he agreed solemnly, but his lips twitched.
"A wedding!" Sally said, clapping her hands excitedly. "Oh, I love weddings! You have to let me do your hair and makeup, though. When May - she's a doppelganger and the sweetest wyvern's mate you ever did meet - when she was becoming the consort to a demon lord, which really is the same thing as a wedding, you know, I did her makeup and hair, and she looked absolutely gorgeous. Well, except for the little nothing that Magoth made her wear as a wedding outfit, but you know how men are - if a few leather straps and bit of fur covering the naughty bits aren't included in the ceremony, they just lose interest."
If you even think of asking me to wear -
Don't worry, my tastes are quite different from those of a demon lord, he answered, adding after a moment's thought, Although if you wanted to wear a little nothing made up of leather straps and fur, I wouldn't object.
I pinched his hand and twined my fingers through his.
"I'm so confused," Jane told Eleanor.
"I'm not, unfortunately," the latter answered, shooting both Alec and me a testy look. "Although I don't understand why all of the Tools have been brought together. That seems foolhardy to me."
Jane leaned to the side and whispered in her ear. Eleanor shrugged her off with a harsh word.
"I demand that you leave this instant!" Brother Ailwin shouted. "They are my Tools, and I don't intend to have any upstart lichmaster get her grubby hands on them! Brother Anton, smite the two women, and then bring the Tools to me."
The poor monk glanced hesitantly at Jane. "Er . . ."
"Must I do everything?" Brother Ailwin looked mean enough to do as he threatened.
Maybe you should shoot him a few more times. He looks like he's recovering.
That's not a bad idea, Alec answered, raising the gun.
"Really, you know, you're such a disturbing force here, I just can't take it any longer," Sally said wearily. "Normally I like disturbing, but now . . . no. It's intolerable. Sable, please return them to the mortal world."
At the name, a thickly muscled man appeared out of nothing, obviously one of Sally's minions. He had absolutely no neck, and muscles on his muscles, all clearly evident because he was clad only in a leopard-print G-string.
We all gawked as Sable picked up a now-swearing Brother Ailwin under one beefy arm, and Brother Anton under the other, before he did that fabric-ofbeing tearing thing, and stepped through the tear, taking the two men with him.
"Ailwin can be delightfully entertaining sometimes, but other times . . . well, I'm sure no one here will complain at him being removed. Now, where were we? Oh, yes. As delightful as it is to chat with all of you - and, Cora, I'm quite, quite serious about my offer to do your hair and makeup for your wedding - I do have other things to attend to, and would like to wrap up this business now. So if you don't mind, please join the other two Tools of Bael, and we'll be out of here in a few minutes."
I stared at Sally in abject disbelief. "You have got to be out of your ever-lovin' mind!"
"Not really, no, although sometimes I admit it's a tempting thought. Come here, Cora," she answered with a little gesture.
"There is no way in hell that I'm going to let you use me after what you did!"
She gave me a look that was filled with disappointment.
"No!" I said again, pressing into Alec. "And that's an 'over my dead body' sort of no!"
"Really? That's an awfully definite statement."
"Yes, it is. I'm definite that I'm not going to let you use me to destroy everyone."
"Oh, I won't destroy everyone," she said with an airy wave of her hand. "Just the people who annoy me most."
I clung to Alec's arm. "I don't think so! Diamond, you really should move away from Sally. She's clearly a nutball."
Sally sighed. "Such abuse from you, when really I'm just trying to help."
"Yeah, but the question is, who are you trying to help?" I snarled. "It's certainly not us!"
"Beloved, this is not doing any good. Cease baiting Sally," Alec said with a little squeeze. "The seneschal promised us that she would assist us with our plans, and despite the recent events, I expect she will do so."
Sally giggled. "Well, as for that - "
"Right. I think I've had just about enough of this," Eleanor interrupted as she strolled forward to Sally. "I know I've had enough of your inane comments, and as for you . . ." She turned to face Alec and me, her eyes narrowed slits. "I've definitely had all I intend to take from you two. Wedding, indeed. Not with my Dark One, you don't. It sounds cliche to say this, but I'm going to nonetheless: If I can't have him, no one will."
I screamed as Alec shoved me away from him, not so much because of the fact that I stumbled over a bit of twisted floor tile and ended up careening into the tangled legs of a piano that lay upside down, but because Eleanor grabbed Diamond and, holding her in front of her, directed a massive blast of black-edged light from Diamond directly at Alec.
"Nooo!" I shrieked as Alec was thrown backward a good forty feet, blood flying in an arc, splattering against the wall as he hit it before sliding down to slump into a pile on the floor. My heart stopped dead in my chest as I stared at Alec, the dark power channeled by Diamond having torn open his chest and shoulder, and ripped away half his throat.
Kristoff and Pia ran to him as I slowly turned to look at Eleanor, my heart, my blood, everything in me, frozen in horror as I realized she had just killed the man I loved.
I started toward her, my movements at first jerky, but by the time I took three steps, I was running, bent on nothing more than her utter and complete destruction. She killed Alec! My Alec!
Kristoff ripped off a strip of his shirt and bound it around the remains of Alec's neck. It would do no good, I knew. Alec couldn't possibly survive such devastating damage. He was dead, and with him had died my heart.
"Vengeance, you know, can be either a satisfying thing or one that lacks satisfaction," Sally said absently, polishing one of the rings she wore.
I stopped as Eleanor, who had been watching Kristoff look up and shake his head at Pia, smiled.
"Diamond," I said softly.
She glanced at me, her face ashen as she watched Kristoff bow his head over his friend. Pia dropped to her knees, sobbing. The two other vampires moved over to examine Alec's body.
Rage filled me, consumed me, gave me strength when I wanted to do nothing more than scream the agony that I knew was just on the edge of my awareness, waiting to suffocate me.
Alec was dead, and I would destroy Eleanor if it was the last thing I did.
"Go to Sally," I said, my gaze on Eleanor.
Diamond moved quickly, sliding out of Eleanor's reach to stand on Ulfur's far side.
"Um . . ." Jane backed up a couple of steps. "I think maybe we should go."
"I'm not going anywhere," Eleanor said, a brittle smile on her lips as she eyed Sally. "I have five hundred years of revenge to dole out, and I intend to enjoy every moment of it. I don't know who you are, missy, but I do know that you have annoyed me, and I don't intend to put up with anyone annoying me ever again. First you'll go, then I'll use that blond strumpet to take down the one who stole my soul, and then I may just clean up the room before I head out to bring order to the chaos that is the world. You, Jane, you may live, but you're no longer in charge - I am."
Sally, oddly enough, wasn't paying Eleanor any attention. Her gaze was on me, speculation evident in her eyes, and just the merest hint of a smile softening her mouth. "Do I take it you've had a change of heart?"
I met her gaze, allowing her to see the full measure of my fury. "I have no heart left."
"Very well." Sally inclined her head in acknowledgment, turning to face Eleanor as I moved over the few yards to Sally's side.
This would be my last act, I knew. I would go out in a blaze of righteousness, though, claiming vengeance for Alec's death.... A sob caught in my throat, threatening to choke me. I swallowed it down, fighting to focus on the woman before me. There was no time to grieve for Alec, to mourn the loss of our future; there was only time for me to do what needed to be done, and then I would allow Bael's power to consume me.
"Just what do you think you're going to do? " Eleanor asked suspiciously, shooting a nervous glance at Jane as the lichmaster began to back up toward the door. "You don't . . . no, you couldn't. Jane, she doesn't have the power to use the woman, does she?"
Sally's smile grew.
"She's a demon lord," Jane almost stammered - the words tumbled out so fast. "She can do anything she wants. I think I hear some members calling. I'd better go see what they want - "
She was out of the door before Eleanor could do so much as blink.
"Such a smart woman, Jane. I've always liked her. Caring, too. And so good with the liches," Sally told me. "She has endless patience with their fussy ways."
"A demon lord? Oh . . ." Eleanor's demeanor changed from aggressive to subservient. "I . . . uh . . . I didn't mean any offense, if you took it. It's just that she took both my soul and my Dark One." Eleanor pointed at me.
Sally considered me with newfound interest. "Mercy. I had no idea you had all that in you. Did you threaten her with untold torments, as well?"
I stared at Eleanor, my throat tight with pain. I couldn't speak, so great was the agony that threatened to claim me. Tears burned in my eyes, but I blinked them away, wanting to see Eleanor's face when she realized that I would give up my life to ensure she was utterly and completely destroyed.
Sally touched my shoulder. "I can see we'd better begin before emotions run too high. If you three would join hands, please."
Eleanor's eyes widened as she, too, started to back up. "I'm sure Jane needs me. I promised to help her.... What the devil?"
Sally made a gesture at Eleanor, evidently one of those binding things that she'd mentioned earlier. "Ward," I think, was the word. I started to reach out to Alec's mind to ask him if that was the correct term, my inner devil collapsing in anguish when I realized that I would never again feel the brush of his mind against mine.
Never is such a very long time, came the softest of whispers.
"Look, I know I said a few things that probably were unwise, but really, I think they're perfectly understandable given the situation," Eleanor said, struggling to make her feet move. "What on earth did you do to me?"
Diamond took my hand as I half turned to the side to look at Alec's body.
"Oh, dear, and you looked like you had so much potential, too," Sally said, tsking at Eleanor. "But you don't even know about a common, ordinary binding ward.... Such a shame. You could have gone places."
I ignored Sally, peering intently at the scene on the other side of the ballroom. Kristoff was holding a weeping Pia to his chest, his head bent to hers. Beyond them, the two vampires stood in consultation. Alec's body remained where it had slumped, his head at an unnatural angle, blood everywhere, soaking his shirt and jacket, seeping out to form a thick pool around him.
Alec? I asked, half-convinced I had conjured up his voice out of desperation.
"All right, I'm willing to admit I made some mistakes, just a couple of tiny ones, and assuming you were all show was one of them," Eleanor told Sally. "But that doesn't mean you have to do anything rash. Why don't you unbind me, and we can talk about this like civilized people."
Silence answered my mental plea.
"Ah, but who ever told you I was civilized? " Sally asked with one of her toothy smiles. She placed two fingers on my shoulder, and two on Ulfur's, standing behind the three of us now locked together by Diamond's firm grip. "Besides, I think you'll want to stay for this. It should be very exciting."
Hope, which had lifted up its head, curled up into a ball and withered away again. There was no hope. Without Alec, there could be nothing.
You've come a long way from wanting to stake me every chance that presented itself.
Alec, you are alive ! My heart, formerly shattered into a million pieces, miraculously re-formed itself, my skin tingling with electricity as Sally started chanting.
Barely. What happened?
Eleanor used Diamond against you. Oh my god, Alec, you're alive! I thought you were dead. I was going to destroy Eleanor for killing you, then die, myself.
The tingling ramped up to that familiar sense of power flowing through me, but my heart and mind were concerned with one thing only - Alec.
As flattering as it is to know you'd kill yourself because I was dead, such a thing doesn't please me at all. You could survive me, Beloved. I would want you to continue to live, to find happiness should I be destroyed.
Alec?
Yes?
Shut up and heal yourself. . . . Jesus wept! The power flowing through and around me suddenly turned back on itself, moving from an explosion of power to an inversion . . . straight through me to Sally.
Her chanting stopped abruptly as she said in a loud, clear voice, "Bael, lord of Abaddon, ruler of seven hundred legions, by that which makes thee, I summon thee to my hand."
What is it?
Sally!
I tried to stop the flow of power going straight to her, but it was no use and I knew it - I was merely a Tool, a channel through which the power moved.
What about her?
She's gone rogue! "What the hell, Sally? You're supposed to be destroying Eleanor, not summoning Bael!"
"I thought that was the plan?" Diamond asked, her voice breathy as she, too, obviously felt the effects of the power now pouring into Sally. "Aren't we supposed to destroy Bael?"
That makes no sense, love. She's here to help us.
You poor, deluded man. You just don't understand - she's not one of us, she's a bad guy. Very bad!
"That's what Corazon said she wanted," Sally said, and began the summoning again. "Bael, lord of Abaddon, ruler of seven hundred legions - "
"Yes, but she won't do it!" I told Diamond. "We can't trust her to actually do away with him. She'll just bring him here and wipe us all out! Don't you see? They're buddies!"
Diamond shot me an astonished look. Beyond her, Ulfur looked confused, and distressed. His horse bore a similar expression. "Sally is what?" Diamond asked.
"Bael's friend, and I use that word with air quotes around it."
"His friend?"
"Air-quotes friend," I corrected. "More like she was rubbing herself all over him in the hotel room, and sold us out to him."
"I did no such thing," Sally interrupted a third repetition of her summons to protest. "I never sell out. I may opt to do things that perhaps are open to differing interpretations than that of which I'd prefer, but sell out? Pfft. There's no material object I desire enough to do that."
"I notice you didn't dispute the rubbing-yourself-allover-him statement," I snapped.
She smiled demurely. "Well, some of his mortal forms are really quite handsome, and you know, I've always had a passion for bad boys. You don't get badder than Bael. There were times when it was just too delicious an opportunity to let pass by."
"See?" I told Diamond. "She's turned on by Satan. Only someone extremely evil would get the hots around Bael."
"Cora, my dear, you're wrong. You don't understand about Sally - "
Sally giggled and cut her off with another summons. "Bael, lord of Abaddon, ruler of seven hundred legions, by that which makes thee, I summon thee to my hand."
I heard Pia cry out Alec's name, and glanced toward them to see Alec attempting - but failing - to pull himself up into a sitting position. You try to move before I get there to see how badly you're hurt, and you'll be one hurtin' cowpoke. Er . . . more hurtin' than you are.
"Bael, lord of Abaddon, ruler of seven hundred legions, by that which makes thee, I summon thee to my hand."
I love you too, Corazon.
Happiness filled me at the gentle brush of his mind against mine. Even if Sally didn't sell us down the river, I knew the future wasn't going to be easy, but somehow, none of that mattered anymore. Stay still, Alec. I'll be right there, and then we'll find you a doctor.
A doctor wouldn't know what to make of me. Kristoff will find a healer, I'm sure, but it's you I really need.
"Cora!" Pia called, gesturing to me. "Alec's alive! He's alive!"
"I'll be there in a second," I yelled back, then turned to pin back Sally with a look that should have scared her witless.
She was watching me, which startled me right out of my antagonism. "Well?" she said.
"Well? "
"Shall we do this, or not?"
"Do which - take out Bael, or grind Eleanor into lich dust?"
"I beg your pardon!" Eleanor said in an outraged tone.
We ignored her.
Sally's eyebrows rose. "Which would you prefer?"
I glanced at Eleanor. She was my past self, a previous version of me. It wasn't her fault that she'd been killed, or brought back after our soul was in use by me.
But she almost killed Alec. Willfully, deliberately, and with more malice than I could understand. "Will you do what I want?" I asked Sally, hesitating to commit myself.
She thought for a moment, then nodded. "Yes. I will agree to abide by your desires."
"You've been summoning Bael. He doesn't seem to be here," I pointed out.
"Hey!" Eleanor said, waving her hands to get Sally's attention. "She's got a chip on her shoulder about me. She also has my soul and my man, although I don't quite understand how he survived when he should have been blown to kingdom come. I think if there is any grinding into dust to be done, it should be her and not me who's destroyed."
"The summons hasn't worked because you have not allowed it to do so," Sally told me.
"I can do that?"
Sally nodded.
"How come I couldn't stop the power when Brother Ailwin used me?" I asked, exasperated.
She gave a little shrug. "He does not have the ability to truly master the Tools. In the hands of amateurs, your control will lessen just as theirs will. But I am different."
"Yes," I said slowly, eyeing her before turning my attention to Alec. Kristoff was wrapping torn bits of his shirt around Alec's neck while Pia was doing likewise to what remained of his shoulder. Once again I was overcome by the sight of so much blood, and the destruction that Eleanor had wrought. Are you going to be all right? I asked.
He smiled into my brain. Yes. The damage is too extensive for me to fully repair by myself, but I am not dead. That is something.
It's not something; it's everything to me. We'll get you a healer to fix you up.
Kristoff has already called for one. Finish with Sally, Beloved. Only then will you truly be safe.
He was talking about Bael, I knew, but the same thing could be said of Eleanor. I eyed her. Will you rest now? You sound tired.
I will rest, he agreed, and just the fact that he did so told me how much it was costing him to remain in contact with me.
"What if I want both?" I asked Sally. "What if I want both Bael and Eleanor pounded into pulp? Would you do that?"
"Of course," she said promptly, taking me by surprise for some reason. I guess it was because I was expecting her to hinder me every step of the way. Heaven knew she'd done a good job of doing that ever since she popped onto the scene.
"I protest this wanton abuse of power," Eleanor shouted. "She has an agenda concerning me."
"Oh, please." I may have snorted a little as I curled a lip at her. The two vampires from the vamp council headed toward me with a look in their eyes that did not bode well.
"I don't think I like you," Diamond told Eleanor, who just looked shocked in response.
"How about them?" I asked, pointing at the two approaching men. "Can I wipe out them, too?"
"I just love someone who thinks like I do!" Sally said, clapping her hands with pleasure. "Is there anyone else you'd like destroyed?"
The two vamps froze, their eyes big as they looked from me to Sally.
Beloved . . .
I know, I know. It's no answer to our problems. But awfully darned tempting, you have to admit. Go back to sleep, or whatever it is you're doing to fix the fact that half of your neck is missing.
"I suppose I shouldn't," I said with a sigh, giving the two vampires a meaningful look.
Sally shook her head. "You just have no followthrough. You'd never make a demon lord if you can't follow through with such interesting ideas."
"I don't want to be a demon lord," I protested as the vampires started toward me again, and added in a rush, "But I don't want them here, either. Can you zap them away? "
"Of course," Sally said, and with a blinding smile at them called for Sable again.
"Now, wait - " one of the vamps started to say as Sable appeared and bowed to Sally, obviously waiting for her orders. "We have no quarrel with you, Beloved. Our business is with the Dark One."
"Cora?" Sally asked, nodding toward the vampires. "Death or just a little relocation, and please don't say the latter because that always makes Sable pout."
I hesitated for just a second. "Just get them out of here."
"You do not know who we are - " the first one said, strangling to a stop when the demon grabbed him by the throat. The second vampire squawked as Sable hauled them both through the opening torn into the fabric of space, presumably out of Abaddon itself.
"Nicely done, although it's not you who will have to put up with a petulant wrath demon," Sally said. "I've always said that having the least amount of witnesses possible when you are conducting heinous acts is the best policy. Now, as to your former self . . ." She inclined her head in question toward Eleanor. "Kill, dismiss, or banish? "
"That's it!" Eleanor snapped, struggling to free herself from the binding ward. "I'm done being nice! Release me this instant so that I can go back to the caves and Jane!"
"Can she get back to the Underworld? " I asked Sally.
"Of course. Mind you, it would mean having a Summoner, and we don't have one, so the only other way will be to kill her, and I, naturally, couldn't do such a thing. I'm a very hands-on sort of person, and it would completely ruin my manicure were I to do so, but you could."
"What?" Eleanor screamed. "Don't encourage her!"
Alec?
No, mi corazon. You do not wish to stain your soul with her death.
I sighed again. "Then I guess it's back to the cave with her. Jane can deal with her."
"I protest this high-handed . . . wait, you're sending me back to Jane?"
"Do you agree to be bound to her union? " Sally asked.
"Yes!" Eleanor said quickly, blinking a couple of times as Sally snapped out a command, Sable appearing out of nothing for the third time. "You're not going to punish me for killing Alec?"
"Oh, I haven't forgotten what you did, or the intention behind it," I told her, and hoped she accurately read the depth of my fury visible in my eyes. "But we'll settle our differences later, once we've taken care of more pressing issues."
Eleanor started to smile, but was yanked through the tear before she could do more than say, "I can't believe you're so - "
"I just hope the word that follows that is 'generous' and not 'gullible,' but I get a feeling it isn't," I said softly.
"Possibly not," Diamond agreed, then looked over her shoulder at Sally. "Are we going to continue? I really should get back to my husband, and my great-grandma is sure to be demanding I see her to explain everything that's been going on."
"That's up to Cora," Sally said, nodding toward me, one eyebrow cocked in question.
I glanced over to where Kristoff and Pia worked at binding Alec's wounds. You hanging in there?
I am mending myself as quickly as possible, but am somewhat hindered by loss of blood.
Help is forthcoming - just let me take care of this and I'll open up the diner. "Let's do this," I said, taking a deep breath.
"At last," Sally said with a slow, satisfied smile. "Now we begin."