My Soul to Take
Page 34
Nash kissed me, one hand gripping the curve of my left hip, and the rest of my sentence was lost forever. When he finally pulled away, he left me breathing hard and craving things I could barely conceptualize. His gaze met mine from inches away, and I noticed that his irises were still swirling in the soft yellow light overhead. Or maybe they were swirling again.
Suddenly his eyes didnt seem so strange. And neither did my fascination with them. Soyour eyes? I whispered when I could speak again, making no move to step back. Is that part of what male bean sidhes do?
My eyes? He frowned and blinked. The colors are swirling, arent they?
Yeah. I leaned closer for a better look, and since I was so close, anyway, I kissed him back, sucking lightly on his lower lip, then delving deeper. Exhilaration shot through me when he groaned and gripped my waist with both hands. His hands started to slide lower, and I only stepped back when I got scared by the realization that I didnt want him to stop.
Um I cleared my throat and shoved my hands in my pockets, then finally looked up to find him watching me. Your eyes are beautiful, I said, desperate to bring the conversation back on track. But dont they kind of clue people in? That yourenot human?
Nah. He brushed a chunk of dark hair from his forehead and grinned. It only happens when Im experiencing somethingumreally intense. I felt myself flush, but he continued as if he hadnt noticed. A bean sidhes eyes are like a mood ring you cant take off. But you cant read your own, and humans cant see it at all. Just other bean sidhes. His held my gaze with an intense look of his own. Yours are doing it too. More shades of blue than the ocean, swirling like a Caribbean whirlpool.
Oh, lovely. My flush deepened until I thought my cheeks would combust. He could see what I was thinkingwhat I wantedin my eyes. But I could see what he wanted too.
Tell me the rest of it. I turned toward the park with my hands still in my pockets. I wanted to know everythingbut mostly I wanted to change the subject.
Nash stepped over a parking bumper and caught up with me in two strides. Human lore says that when a bean sidhe wails, shes mourning the dead, or the soon-to-be dead, but thats not the whole story. He glanced up to study my profile. Ive seen you hold back your wail twice. What do you remember about the time you let it go?
I flinched at the memory, reluctant to revisit the event that landed me in the hospital. It was horrible. Once I let it go, I couldnt pull it back. And I couldnt think about anything else. There was this feeling of total despair, then this awful noise thatfelt like it just erupted from my throat. I stepped over a landscape timber, then onto the thick bed of wood chips carpeting the playground, and Nash followed. The scream was in control of me, rather than the other way around. People were staring, and dropping purses and shopping bags to cover their ears. This little girl started crying and clinging to her mom, but I couldnt make it stop. It was the worst day of my life. Seriously.
My mom says the first times always rough. Though it doesnt usually get you locked up.
Thats right; his mother was a bean sidhe too. No wonder shed stared at me. She probably knew I had no idea what I was.
When we got to the heart of the playgrounda massive wooden castle full of towers, and tunnels, and slidesNash stepped beneath a piece of equipment and reached up for the first monkey bar beam. Were you watching the pre-departed when he actuallydeparted?
I raised an eyebrow in dark amusement, trying not to stare at the triceps clearly displayed beneath the snug, short sleeves of his tee. Pre-departed?
He grinned. Its a technical term.
Aah. No, I wasnt looking at anything. I sank onto a low tire swing held up by three chains, rocking back and forth slowly, trying to forget the words even as I spoke them. I was trying to make the screeching stop. Mall Security called my aunt and uncle, and when I couldnt stop crying, they took me to the hospital.
Nash let go of the bar and settled onto the rubber-coated steps of a nearby slide, watching me from a couple of feet away. Well, if youd looked at the other guy, you would have seen the deceaseds soul. Hovering.
Hovering?
Yeah. Souls are fundamentally attracted to a bean sidhes wail, and as long as it lasts, they cant move on. They just kind of hang there, suspended. You remember sirens in mythology? How their song could draw a sailor to his death?
Yeah? And that image did nothing to ease the apprehension now swelling inside me like heartburn.
Its like that. Except the people are already dead. And they arent usually sailors.
Wow. I put my feet down to stop the tire from rocking. Im like flypaper for the soul. Thatsweird. Why would anyone want to do that? Suspend some poor guys soul?
Nash shrugged and stood to pull me up. Lots of reasons. A bean sidhe who knows what shes doing can hold on to a soul long enough for him to prepare for the afterlife. Let him make his peace.
I frowned, unable to picture it. Okay, but how peaceful can it possibly be, with me screaming bloody murder?
Suddenly his eyes didnt seem so strange. And neither did my fascination with them. Soyour eyes? I whispered when I could speak again, making no move to step back. Is that part of what male bean sidhes do?
My eyes? He frowned and blinked. The colors are swirling, arent they?
Yeah. I leaned closer for a better look, and since I was so close, anyway, I kissed him back, sucking lightly on his lower lip, then delving deeper. Exhilaration shot through me when he groaned and gripped my waist with both hands. His hands started to slide lower, and I only stepped back when I got scared by the realization that I didnt want him to stop.
Um I cleared my throat and shoved my hands in my pockets, then finally looked up to find him watching me. Your eyes are beautiful, I said, desperate to bring the conversation back on track. But dont they kind of clue people in? That yourenot human?
Nah. He brushed a chunk of dark hair from his forehead and grinned. It only happens when Im experiencing somethingumreally intense. I felt myself flush, but he continued as if he hadnt noticed. A bean sidhes eyes are like a mood ring you cant take off. But you cant read your own, and humans cant see it at all. Just other bean sidhes. His held my gaze with an intense look of his own. Yours are doing it too. More shades of blue than the ocean, swirling like a Caribbean whirlpool.
Oh, lovely. My flush deepened until I thought my cheeks would combust. He could see what I was thinkingwhat I wantedin my eyes. But I could see what he wanted too.
Tell me the rest of it. I turned toward the park with my hands still in my pockets. I wanted to know everythingbut mostly I wanted to change the subject.
Nash stepped over a parking bumper and caught up with me in two strides. Human lore says that when a bean sidhe wails, shes mourning the dead, or the soon-to-be dead, but thats not the whole story. He glanced up to study my profile. Ive seen you hold back your wail twice. What do you remember about the time you let it go?
I flinched at the memory, reluctant to revisit the event that landed me in the hospital. It was horrible. Once I let it go, I couldnt pull it back. And I couldnt think about anything else. There was this feeling of total despair, then this awful noise thatfelt like it just erupted from my throat. I stepped over a landscape timber, then onto the thick bed of wood chips carpeting the playground, and Nash followed. The scream was in control of me, rather than the other way around. People were staring, and dropping purses and shopping bags to cover their ears. This little girl started crying and clinging to her mom, but I couldnt make it stop. It was the worst day of my life. Seriously.
My mom says the first times always rough. Though it doesnt usually get you locked up.
Thats right; his mother was a bean sidhe too. No wonder shed stared at me. She probably knew I had no idea what I was.
When we got to the heart of the playgrounda massive wooden castle full of towers, and tunnels, and slidesNash stepped beneath a piece of equipment and reached up for the first monkey bar beam. Were you watching the pre-departed when he actuallydeparted?
I raised an eyebrow in dark amusement, trying not to stare at the triceps clearly displayed beneath the snug, short sleeves of his tee. Pre-departed?
He grinned. Its a technical term.
Aah. No, I wasnt looking at anything. I sank onto a low tire swing held up by three chains, rocking back and forth slowly, trying to forget the words even as I spoke them. I was trying to make the screeching stop. Mall Security called my aunt and uncle, and when I couldnt stop crying, they took me to the hospital.
Nash let go of the bar and settled onto the rubber-coated steps of a nearby slide, watching me from a couple of feet away. Well, if youd looked at the other guy, you would have seen the deceaseds soul. Hovering.
Hovering?
Yeah. Souls are fundamentally attracted to a bean sidhes wail, and as long as it lasts, they cant move on. They just kind of hang there, suspended. You remember sirens in mythology? How their song could draw a sailor to his death?
Yeah? And that image did nothing to ease the apprehension now swelling inside me like heartburn.
Its like that. Except the people are already dead. And they arent usually sailors.
Wow. I put my feet down to stop the tire from rocking. Im like flypaper for the soul. Thatsweird. Why would anyone want to do that? Suspend some poor guys soul?
Nash shrugged and stood to pull me up. Lots of reasons. A bean sidhe who knows what shes doing can hold on to a soul long enough for him to prepare for the afterlife. Let him make his peace.
I frowned, unable to picture it. Okay, but how peaceful can it possibly be, with me screaming bloody murder?
