Not Quite Over You
Page 56
He kissed her. “You have no idea.”
* * *
JASPER PACED THE length of his office. Sometimes the writing was easy and sometimes it was hard. Today it was being just plain mean.
He thought about throwing his computer out the window, but that would only create more problems. He’d have to replace the damn thing, download his work in progress from the cloud and he’d still have pages to write.
He swore under his breath, stalked back to his desk and sat down, determined to write at least two more pages. That should get him to the end of the scene, then he’d eat lunch and maybe go for a walk. With his head clear, he would come back and finish out the day’s quota.
Twenty agonizing minutes later, he saved his work and practically sprinted out of the room. He’d barely made it into the kitchen when he heard a car pull up. He looked out the front window and saw Wynn walking up the path. As far as he knew, they didn’t have any plans to get together, but he wasn’t about to say no to whatever she was offering.
He was smiling when he opened the front door, but that smile faded when he caught sight of the anger in her eyes.
“What’s going on?” he asked.
She stepped into his foyer and pointed her finger at him. “You broke the rules. We were clear and you broke them. You’ve been lying to me for months, Jasper. How could you?”
Before he could tell her he had no idea what she was talking about, she shook her head and continued.
“Don’t you dare look like you’re confused. You know what you’ve done. You made friends with Hunter. And don’t bother denying it. He told me. He said you two hang out together a lot. You play video games and you’ve taught him some fighting techniques with your stupid sticks. You’re friends.”
He thought about suggesting they go into the living room to talk, but he didn’t think Wynn was in the mood to do anything but blame him for everything wrong.
“You’re right,” he told her calmly. “I’m friends with Hunter. For what it’s worth, he approached me. We do hang out. We talk about guy stuff. I helped him with his throw in baseball. Sometimes I’ve helped him with his English homework. You sure do have every right to be pissed. I’m such an asshole.”
“You may think because of what you do for a living that you’re more verbal than the rest of us, but you’re wrong. And sarcasm isn’t going to help you out of this. We had a deal.”
The last four words came out in a scream.
“We had a deal,” she repeated, just as loud. “You weren’t to go near him.”
“Your son needs a man in his life, Wynn. I’m sorry you don’t like that, but it’s true. If you don’t want it to be me, then fine, but it needs to be someone.”
“He is doing just fine without a man in his life. He’s a good boy.”
“He needs to learn how to be a good man. You’re a terrific mother, but your skill set is only going to get you so far.”
“You don’t get to say,” she told him, her voice thick with rage.
Her fury was so out of proportion with what had happened that he just couldn’t wrap his mind around the problem. “Is it me or all men?”
“I don’t want him knowing about my personal life. I told you that.”
“Yes, you did. So I have a question. How is he supposed to know how relationships work if he never sees one up close? How is he supposed to learn how couples navigate things if that never happens in his house? He’s never seen a fight or an apology or watched as someone other than you figured out a budget or a Christmas list. What are you so afraid of?”
“You will not distract me from my point. I told you the rules and you violated them. We’re finished.”
He’d had a feeling that if she found out about him and Hunter, she would do as she’d always said she would. Wynn was a woman of her word. Now, as what she’d said sank in, he waited to feel crushed by the news. Or at least experience a strong sense of loss. But there seemed to be only some sadness and the knowledge that this moment had been inevitable from their very first night together.
“Just like that?” he asked.
“The rules exist for a reason.”
“Which is?”
“That’s not your business.”
“You’re breaking up with me, which makes it my business, but that’s okay. Here’s the thing. What I want to know is who hurt you so badly that you have to be this scared? There’s something in your past that makes you act like this. I know you could do a lot better than me, but let’s ignore that. On the surface, I’m a pretty decent guy. I’ve always treated you well. I don’t cheat, I don’t lie and I’m sure not after your money. As for Hunter, you’re right. I broke the rules, but you know what? I’m not sorry. Because however much you love him, it’s not enough. Hunter can’t grow up in your little bubble. He needs more, and when you keep him from that, you’re only hurting him.”
For a second he thought he’d gotten through to her. Her mouth twisted and she looked like she was going to cry. But before he could say anything, her anger returned. Her whole body stiffened and she glared at him again.
“Stay away from me and stay away from Hunter,” she said loudly. “We are done. I don’t want to hear from you ever again. Is that clear?”
“I’m sorry, Wynn. Not about the breakup. We’ll both get over it quicker than we should, but about whatever you went through. I wish I could have convinced you not to be scared. I hope you find whatever it is you need to be whole.”
One tear slipped down her cheek. She brushed it away angrily. “Go to hell.”
“You’re upset. Be careful driving back to town.”
She stalked off without saying anything. Jasper watched until she disappeared down the driveway, then he closed the door and leaned against it.
His gut churned, but not because he missed her. He would, and then he would get over it. What got him was the realization that there were so many times he thought he was the only one in pain, the only one with ghosts. He had to keep reminding himself that everyone out there had a story. Some were great, with love and laughter and all things good. And some sucked.
He walked toward his office, the end of his scene suddenly clear. He hoped Wynn could figure out what was wrong and how to fix it because hiding never worked. He knew that for sure.
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
THE BOXING WORKOUTS were always challenging, but Drew had a feeling there was something else driving Jasper. His friend went after the bag like it was the enemy and only he could defeat it. The punch combinations were lightning fast, and hard enough to break bone.
Cade watched him, a worried frown drawing his brows together. “I’m not sparring with him,” he muttered. “Bethany would kill me if I came home with a black eye or split lip this close to the party.”
Drew had no reason to worry about his face, but he wasn’t eager to spar with Jasper, either.
Jasper stayed on the bag another five minutes, his blows sounding like machine gunfire. He finally stepped back and dropped his arms to his sides.
He was dripping sweat and barely able to catch his breath. There was a look in his eyes Drew had never seen before—something bleak and lost. No, not lost—gone forever.
“Want to talk about it?” Cade asked.
Jasper unfastened his gloves and pulled them off, then he walked to the refrigerator and pulled out three bottles of water. After tossing them each one, he said, “Wynn found out I was friends with Hunter and she ended things.”
* * *
JASPER PACED THE length of his office. Sometimes the writing was easy and sometimes it was hard. Today it was being just plain mean.
He thought about throwing his computer out the window, but that would only create more problems. He’d have to replace the damn thing, download his work in progress from the cloud and he’d still have pages to write.
He swore under his breath, stalked back to his desk and sat down, determined to write at least two more pages. That should get him to the end of the scene, then he’d eat lunch and maybe go for a walk. With his head clear, he would come back and finish out the day’s quota.
Twenty agonizing minutes later, he saved his work and practically sprinted out of the room. He’d barely made it into the kitchen when he heard a car pull up. He looked out the front window and saw Wynn walking up the path. As far as he knew, they didn’t have any plans to get together, but he wasn’t about to say no to whatever she was offering.
He was smiling when he opened the front door, but that smile faded when he caught sight of the anger in her eyes.
“What’s going on?” he asked.
She stepped into his foyer and pointed her finger at him. “You broke the rules. We were clear and you broke them. You’ve been lying to me for months, Jasper. How could you?”
Before he could tell her he had no idea what she was talking about, she shook her head and continued.
“Don’t you dare look like you’re confused. You know what you’ve done. You made friends with Hunter. And don’t bother denying it. He told me. He said you two hang out together a lot. You play video games and you’ve taught him some fighting techniques with your stupid sticks. You’re friends.”
He thought about suggesting they go into the living room to talk, but he didn’t think Wynn was in the mood to do anything but blame him for everything wrong.
“You’re right,” he told her calmly. “I’m friends with Hunter. For what it’s worth, he approached me. We do hang out. We talk about guy stuff. I helped him with his throw in baseball. Sometimes I’ve helped him with his English homework. You sure do have every right to be pissed. I’m such an asshole.”
“You may think because of what you do for a living that you’re more verbal than the rest of us, but you’re wrong. And sarcasm isn’t going to help you out of this. We had a deal.”
The last four words came out in a scream.
“We had a deal,” she repeated, just as loud. “You weren’t to go near him.”
“Your son needs a man in his life, Wynn. I’m sorry you don’t like that, but it’s true. If you don’t want it to be me, then fine, but it needs to be someone.”
“He is doing just fine without a man in his life. He’s a good boy.”
“He needs to learn how to be a good man. You’re a terrific mother, but your skill set is only going to get you so far.”
“You don’t get to say,” she told him, her voice thick with rage.
Her fury was so out of proportion with what had happened that he just couldn’t wrap his mind around the problem. “Is it me or all men?”
“I don’t want him knowing about my personal life. I told you that.”
“Yes, you did. So I have a question. How is he supposed to know how relationships work if he never sees one up close? How is he supposed to learn how couples navigate things if that never happens in his house? He’s never seen a fight or an apology or watched as someone other than you figured out a budget or a Christmas list. What are you so afraid of?”
“You will not distract me from my point. I told you the rules and you violated them. We’re finished.”
He’d had a feeling that if she found out about him and Hunter, she would do as she’d always said she would. Wynn was a woman of her word. Now, as what she’d said sank in, he waited to feel crushed by the news. Or at least experience a strong sense of loss. But there seemed to be only some sadness and the knowledge that this moment had been inevitable from their very first night together.
“Just like that?” he asked.
“The rules exist for a reason.”
“Which is?”
“That’s not your business.”
“You’re breaking up with me, which makes it my business, but that’s okay. Here’s the thing. What I want to know is who hurt you so badly that you have to be this scared? There’s something in your past that makes you act like this. I know you could do a lot better than me, but let’s ignore that. On the surface, I’m a pretty decent guy. I’ve always treated you well. I don’t cheat, I don’t lie and I’m sure not after your money. As for Hunter, you’re right. I broke the rules, but you know what? I’m not sorry. Because however much you love him, it’s not enough. Hunter can’t grow up in your little bubble. He needs more, and when you keep him from that, you’re only hurting him.”
For a second he thought he’d gotten through to her. Her mouth twisted and she looked like she was going to cry. But before he could say anything, her anger returned. Her whole body stiffened and she glared at him again.
“Stay away from me and stay away from Hunter,” she said loudly. “We are done. I don’t want to hear from you ever again. Is that clear?”
“I’m sorry, Wynn. Not about the breakup. We’ll both get over it quicker than we should, but about whatever you went through. I wish I could have convinced you not to be scared. I hope you find whatever it is you need to be whole.”
One tear slipped down her cheek. She brushed it away angrily. “Go to hell.”
“You’re upset. Be careful driving back to town.”
She stalked off without saying anything. Jasper watched until she disappeared down the driveway, then he closed the door and leaned against it.
His gut churned, but not because he missed her. He would, and then he would get over it. What got him was the realization that there were so many times he thought he was the only one in pain, the only one with ghosts. He had to keep reminding himself that everyone out there had a story. Some were great, with love and laughter and all things good. And some sucked.
He walked toward his office, the end of his scene suddenly clear. He hoped Wynn could figure out what was wrong and how to fix it because hiding never worked. He knew that for sure.
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
THE BOXING WORKOUTS were always challenging, but Drew had a feeling there was something else driving Jasper. His friend went after the bag like it was the enemy and only he could defeat it. The punch combinations were lightning fast, and hard enough to break bone.
Cade watched him, a worried frown drawing his brows together. “I’m not sparring with him,” he muttered. “Bethany would kill me if I came home with a black eye or split lip this close to the party.”
Drew had no reason to worry about his face, but he wasn’t eager to spar with Jasper, either.
Jasper stayed on the bag another five minutes, his blows sounding like machine gunfire. He finally stepped back and dropped his arms to his sides.
He was dripping sweat and barely able to catch his breath. There was a look in his eyes Drew had never seen before—something bleak and lost. No, not lost—gone forever.
“Want to talk about it?” Cade asked.
Jasper unfastened his gloves and pulled them off, then he walked to the refrigerator and pulled out three bottles of water. After tossing them each one, he said, “Wynn found out I was friends with Hunter and she ended things.”
