Nothing Left to Lose
Page 1
Chapter One
Sweet sixteen is a day that every girl should remember as special in their lives. In some cultures, it’s even considered to be the start of passage into womanhood. My sixteenth was anything but sweet; it was more like the passage into hell on earth. March 12 was the day my dreams died and my life was sent into a downward spiral of pain, grief and terror. My sixteenth birthday left an irrevocable scar on me, and was the beginning of events that I would see repeatedly in my nightmares.
Right now I was standing in the cold of the night, queuing for admittance outside club Ozone – unknowingly waiting for my traumatic ordeal to begin. The balls of my feet were already aching, a product of the ridiculously high heels that I wore. The cool wind whipped around me, making the little black dress that I was wearing billow around my thighs. My perfect boyfriend, Jack Roberts, was rubbing my arms, trying to warm me up. We’d been standing in line for the club for almost an hour, and finally were quite near the front.
“Jack, I’m not sure this is gonna work. Maybe we should just go watch a movie or something?” I whispered, eyeing the doorman, who was looking at the line suspiciously.
“Anna, it’ll work. You asked me to take you to a club for your birthday, so I’m doing exactly that,” he replied, cupping his chilly hands around my face.
I looked at him and my heart stuttered. I loved this boy with everything I had in me. He was kind, loving, caring, generous, thoughtful, and not to mention handsome. With his short blond hair and sparkling blue eyes, he was every girl’s dream. Literally. Every girl I knew was in love with my boyfriend, but he had only ever had eyes for me. We’d met when we were five years old. He’d asked me to be his girlfriend the first time I saw him, and we’d been together ever since. He was my everything, and we would be together forever. We already had everything planned – finish school, then college, then Jack would become a doctor like he’d always wanted to be, and I would become an artist. Eventually, we would get married and have kids. Perfect.
Three months ago, Jack had asked me what I wanted to do to celebrate my birthday; he said that I could choose anything in the world and we would do it. So I decided to go out to a club, and then I wanted to stay at a hotel, where we would have sex for the first time. After three months of planning and scheming, we had finally convinced our parents to let us stay out. Jack had gotten us both a fake ID card, and I was so excited that I could barely contain myself.
Now that we were here though, in the cold, surrounded by half-drunken people, all I wanted to do was go back to the hotel and have him run his hands all over my body to warm me up, and then we would finally be together physically.
I smiled up at him, my stomach clenching in anticipation. He smiled back and bent his head to kiss me. I melted against him. When Jack kissed me, I felt amazing, like my heart was flying, and like I was the luckiest girl in the world. His hands slipped down to my ass, squeezing gently, causing a small smile to tug at the corners of my mouth.
When he broke the kiss, he pulled back, grinning at me. His eyes sparkled in the dim street lights. “I love you, Anna.”
My heart throbbed again as my whole body broke out in goosebumps. I loved the sound of those three words coming out of his mouth; I still wasn’t used to hearing them even after all these years.
“I love you too,” I replied, and I did. I loved him more than anything. He kissed me again, pulling my body closer to his.
A gentle tap on my shoulder made me jump and break the kiss.
“Hi,” a male voice said from behind me.
I turned around to see a man who was probably in his mid-twenties. He wasn’t in the line of people waiting to enter the club; he stood the other side of the ropes. He was quite good-looking, with nicely styled, dark brown hair and brown eyes. A sleek, black, button down shirt covered his broad shoulders, and he’d paired it with black pants and extremely expensive-looking shoes. He was looking me over slowly.
“Er, hi,” I replied, smiling sweetly, trying to be friendly in case he worked here. He wasn’t on his own; two other guys stood behind him.
“I’m Carter,” the brown haired guy said, holding out his hand for me to shake.
“Anna.” I put my hand in his, shaking it politely. He didn’t let go, instead he pulled me towards him, away from Jack.
“I can get you in if you want, saves you waiting in the cold,” he offered, smiling. My insides bubbled with excitement at the thought of getting into the club. I looked back at Jack, who was frowning angrily and glaring at my hand that the guy still held.
“Yeah? That’d be great! It’s freezing out here,” I chirped happily, trying not to jump up and down on the spot from excitement.
Carter laughed. “Come on then, Anna.” He nodded to one of the people that he was with, and they immediately unclipped the rope so I could step out of the line.
I reached back and grabbed Jack’s hand, grinning ecstatically.
“Er, Princess, your boy’s not invited,” Carter said, sneering at Jack as if he was something he’d just stepped in.
Confusion settled over me. “What? I thought you said you could get us in.”
He finally let go of my hand and stepped back. “I said I could get you in. We don’t need any spectators.” He jerked his chin towards Jack as his eyebrows furrowed in annoyance.
I frowned angrily. What a jerk! He’d interrupted me and Jack making out, but thought I’d go into the club with him and leave Jack outside? “Right, well no thanks, I’m with my boyfriend. I thought you meant both of us. Sorry.” I took the rope back out of the other guy’s hand and clipped it back to the ring, then wrapped my arms around the love of my life, glaring at Carter.
Sweet sixteen is a day that every girl should remember as special in their lives. In some cultures, it’s even considered to be the start of passage into womanhood. My sixteenth was anything but sweet; it was more like the passage into hell on earth. March 12 was the day my dreams died and my life was sent into a downward spiral of pain, grief and terror. My sixteenth birthday left an irrevocable scar on me, and was the beginning of events that I would see repeatedly in my nightmares.
Right now I was standing in the cold of the night, queuing for admittance outside club Ozone – unknowingly waiting for my traumatic ordeal to begin. The balls of my feet were already aching, a product of the ridiculously high heels that I wore. The cool wind whipped around me, making the little black dress that I was wearing billow around my thighs. My perfect boyfriend, Jack Roberts, was rubbing my arms, trying to warm me up. We’d been standing in line for the club for almost an hour, and finally were quite near the front.
“Jack, I’m not sure this is gonna work. Maybe we should just go watch a movie or something?” I whispered, eyeing the doorman, who was looking at the line suspiciously.
“Anna, it’ll work. You asked me to take you to a club for your birthday, so I’m doing exactly that,” he replied, cupping his chilly hands around my face.
I looked at him and my heart stuttered. I loved this boy with everything I had in me. He was kind, loving, caring, generous, thoughtful, and not to mention handsome. With his short blond hair and sparkling blue eyes, he was every girl’s dream. Literally. Every girl I knew was in love with my boyfriend, but he had only ever had eyes for me. We’d met when we were five years old. He’d asked me to be his girlfriend the first time I saw him, and we’d been together ever since. He was my everything, and we would be together forever. We already had everything planned – finish school, then college, then Jack would become a doctor like he’d always wanted to be, and I would become an artist. Eventually, we would get married and have kids. Perfect.
Three months ago, Jack had asked me what I wanted to do to celebrate my birthday; he said that I could choose anything in the world and we would do it. So I decided to go out to a club, and then I wanted to stay at a hotel, where we would have sex for the first time. After three months of planning and scheming, we had finally convinced our parents to let us stay out. Jack had gotten us both a fake ID card, and I was so excited that I could barely contain myself.
Now that we were here though, in the cold, surrounded by half-drunken people, all I wanted to do was go back to the hotel and have him run his hands all over my body to warm me up, and then we would finally be together physically.
I smiled up at him, my stomach clenching in anticipation. He smiled back and bent his head to kiss me. I melted against him. When Jack kissed me, I felt amazing, like my heart was flying, and like I was the luckiest girl in the world. His hands slipped down to my ass, squeezing gently, causing a small smile to tug at the corners of my mouth.
When he broke the kiss, he pulled back, grinning at me. His eyes sparkled in the dim street lights. “I love you, Anna.”
My heart throbbed again as my whole body broke out in goosebumps. I loved the sound of those three words coming out of his mouth; I still wasn’t used to hearing them even after all these years.
“I love you too,” I replied, and I did. I loved him more than anything. He kissed me again, pulling my body closer to his.
A gentle tap on my shoulder made me jump and break the kiss.
“Hi,” a male voice said from behind me.
I turned around to see a man who was probably in his mid-twenties. He wasn’t in the line of people waiting to enter the club; he stood the other side of the ropes. He was quite good-looking, with nicely styled, dark brown hair and brown eyes. A sleek, black, button down shirt covered his broad shoulders, and he’d paired it with black pants and extremely expensive-looking shoes. He was looking me over slowly.
“Er, hi,” I replied, smiling sweetly, trying to be friendly in case he worked here. He wasn’t on his own; two other guys stood behind him.
“I’m Carter,” the brown haired guy said, holding out his hand for me to shake.
“Anna.” I put my hand in his, shaking it politely. He didn’t let go, instead he pulled me towards him, away from Jack.
“I can get you in if you want, saves you waiting in the cold,” he offered, smiling. My insides bubbled with excitement at the thought of getting into the club. I looked back at Jack, who was frowning angrily and glaring at my hand that the guy still held.
“Yeah? That’d be great! It’s freezing out here,” I chirped happily, trying not to jump up and down on the spot from excitement.
Carter laughed. “Come on then, Anna.” He nodded to one of the people that he was with, and they immediately unclipped the rope so I could step out of the line.
I reached back and grabbed Jack’s hand, grinning ecstatically.
“Er, Princess, your boy’s not invited,” Carter said, sneering at Jack as if he was something he’d just stepped in.
Confusion settled over me. “What? I thought you said you could get us in.”
He finally let go of my hand and stepped back. “I said I could get you in. We don’t need any spectators.” He jerked his chin towards Jack as his eyebrows furrowed in annoyance.
I frowned angrily. What a jerk! He’d interrupted me and Jack making out, but thought I’d go into the club with him and leave Jack outside? “Right, well no thanks, I’m with my boyfriend. I thought you meant both of us. Sorry.” I took the rope back out of the other guy’s hand and clipped it back to the ring, then wrapped my arms around the love of my life, glaring at Carter.
