Nowhere But Here
Page 113
Except for Eli, the room’s empty. Emily’s dad took her out to lunch. Mom herded Olivia to an appointment. Razor closes the door and, with the click of a button, Eli turns off the TV.
He’s lying on top of the covers in a pair of jeans. Because Eli’s a tough son of a bitch, he was placed in a regular room a few days ago. He’s shirtless and there’s a bandage over his chest where the bullet went clean through. “You don’t agree?”
Incapable of bullshitting. It’s what I like about Eli. What I also like? He knows what’s going on without anyone telling him.
“No. Emily doesn’t lie and I’m not going to ask her to.”
Eli rubs at the spot above his wound. “I don’t want her involved in this, nor do I want her name on some police report, and I wouldn’t think you’d want her to relive what happened. I especially don’t want her to say anything that’s going to cause problems for her. Think about it. There is nothing you or Emily can add. You didn’t see what happened. You were outside.”
He’s right. It’s the conversation Emily and I have had with the club’s lawyer again and again. We never heard the Riot threaten Eli.
I assess the man in front of me. He’s the person I’ve longed to be. He was always larger than life. The complete badass who I thought had it all. “You gave Emily up so she could have a better life, right? So she wouldn’t be scared?”
Eli nods like I explained my concerns away. “Exactly.”
“Do you know what Emily taught me?”
“What?”
That I don’t want to be the man who people second-guess. I want to be known for my integrity. “That I’m good with kids, especially ones like Brian.”
Good enough that maybe my future isn’t as set as I thought it was. Good enough that I’m willing to do this for Emily and myself. It’s time that I do what Dad has been waiting for me to do: become my own man.
Eli’s cut hangs on the chair across the room. The skull with the fire blazing out of it stares at me. “Emily definitely had a different life than she would’ve had if she and Meg stayed in Snowflake. She has options now that she never would have if she had grown up here, but you and Meg were wrong.”
Eli studies me from toe to head. “How’s that?”
“You and Meg hurt a lot of people along the way in the name of protecting Emily. Told a ton of lies to cover your tracks and Emily still grew up scared. Whether she was raised in Florida or here in Snowflake, the result turned out to be the same. The lies—they were for nothing.”
I slip the cut off my back and slide my thumb over my name: Oz. All I desired was to be part of the whole, to be part of the club. It’s still important to me, but it’s not important enough to ruin any more lives.
With a sensation close to being punched in the gut, I lay my cut on Eli’s bed. “I’m not lying and I won’t ask Emily to, either.”
My footsteps fill the room as I head for the door and when I place my hand on the knob, Eli calls out to me, “Oz.”
I glance over my shoulder. Eli gingerly swings his legs off the bed. A grimace mars his face as he pierces me with his black eyes. “Get your ass over here and help me get to the bathroom. I’m not going to fall and give them a reason to keep me here any longer and if my daughter is going to be in the room when I meet with the police, I’d prefer to do it with a shirt on.”
“What did you say?”
Eli’s slow as he gathers himself to his feet. “You fucking heard me, and get your cut back on. If you ever lay your cut at my feet again, I’m going to cut your balls off regardless of club rules, you got me?”
Even though he’s asking for my help, Eli’s moving fine toward the bathroom. “I said, do you got me?”
My brain whirls as I understand what’s happening: Eli’s changing his mind. “Yeah, I got you.”
Emily
THE POLICE OFFICER shuffles his feet and glances at the door again while I swat at the tears forming at the corners of my eye. We’re in Eli’s hospital room, but I’m the one cross-legged on his bed. He’s fully dressed and sitting in the chair next to the desk. The club’s lawyer is in the chair next to me. My father hovers off to the side and Oz leans against the wall.
I meet Oz’s eyes again and he offers me a soft smile of encouragement. It’s frustrating. So frustrating. I tear the tissue in my hand in half and sigh. I didn’t see anything or hear anything and I don’t understand how that’s possible.
I scowl in Eli’s direction. “An accident? What happened to you was an accident?”
Eli shrugs. “I don’t remember. We have to take your grandparents’ word for it.”
My eyes slam shut. I told the truth, Oz told the truth and the doctor told the police officer that with trauma like Eli’s it isn’t unusual that he’d forget the moments leading up to the event.
The detective shuts his notebook and asks again, “Did they actually threaten Eli or you? Not how you felt, did they say specific words?”
I swallow the lump in my throat. “No.”
“You left before the incident happened.”
“Yes.”
The officer addresses the lawyer. “We’ll let you know if we need anything else.”
And he leaves. Just like that. Goes. Another tear slips down my face.
“Jeff and I would appreciate a few minutes alone with Emily,” Eli states.
He’s lying on top of the covers in a pair of jeans. Because Eli’s a tough son of a bitch, he was placed in a regular room a few days ago. He’s shirtless and there’s a bandage over his chest where the bullet went clean through. “You don’t agree?”
Incapable of bullshitting. It’s what I like about Eli. What I also like? He knows what’s going on without anyone telling him.
“No. Emily doesn’t lie and I’m not going to ask her to.”
Eli rubs at the spot above his wound. “I don’t want her involved in this, nor do I want her name on some police report, and I wouldn’t think you’d want her to relive what happened. I especially don’t want her to say anything that’s going to cause problems for her. Think about it. There is nothing you or Emily can add. You didn’t see what happened. You were outside.”
He’s right. It’s the conversation Emily and I have had with the club’s lawyer again and again. We never heard the Riot threaten Eli.
I assess the man in front of me. He’s the person I’ve longed to be. He was always larger than life. The complete badass who I thought had it all. “You gave Emily up so she could have a better life, right? So she wouldn’t be scared?”
Eli nods like I explained my concerns away. “Exactly.”
“Do you know what Emily taught me?”
“What?”
That I don’t want to be the man who people second-guess. I want to be known for my integrity. “That I’m good with kids, especially ones like Brian.”
Good enough that maybe my future isn’t as set as I thought it was. Good enough that I’m willing to do this for Emily and myself. It’s time that I do what Dad has been waiting for me to do: become my own man.
Eli’s cut hangs on the chair across the room. The skull with the fire blazing out of it stares at me. “Emily definitely had a different life than she would’ve had if she and Meg stayed in Snowflake. She has options now that she never would have if she had grown up here, but you and Meg were wrong.”
Eli studies me from toe to head. “How’s that?”
“You and Meg hurt a lot of people along the way in the name of protecting Emily. Told a ton of lies to cover your tracks and Emily still grew up scared. Whether she was raised in Florida or here in Snowflake, the result turned out to be the same. The lies—they were for nothing.”
I slip the cut off my back and slide my thumb over my name: Oz. All I desired was to be part of the whole, to be part of the club. It’s still important to me, but it’s not important enough to ruin any more lives.
With a sensation close to being punched in the gut, I lay my cut on Eli’s bed. “I’m not lying and I won’t ask Emily to, either.”
My footsteps fill the room as I head for the door and when I place my hand on the knob, Eli calls out to me, “Oz.”
I glance over my shoulder. Eli gingerly swings his legs off the bed. A grimace mars his face as he pierces me with his black eyes. “Get your ass over here and help me get to the bathroom. I’m not going to fall and give them a reason to keep me here any longer and if my daughter is going to be in the room when I meet with the police, I’d prefer to do it with a shirt on.”
“What did you say?”
Eli’s slow as he gathers himself to his feet. “You fucking heard me, and get your cut back on. If you ever lay your cut at my feet again, I’m going to cut your balls off regardless of club rules, you got me?”
Even though he’s asking for my help, Eli’s moving fine toward the bathroom. “I said, do you got me?”
My brain whirls as I understand what’s happening: Eli’s changing his mind. “Yeah, I got you.”
Emily
THE POLICE OFFICER shuffles his feet and glances at the door again while I swat at the tears forming at the corners of my eye. We’re in Eli’s hospital room, but I’m the one cross-legged on his bed. He’s fully dressed and sitting in the chair next to the desk. The club’s lawyer is in the chair next to me. My father hovers off to the side and Oz leans against the wall.
I meet Oz’s eyes again and he offers me a soft smile of encouragement. It’s frustrating. So frustrating. I tear the tissue in my hand in half and sigh. I didn’t see anything or hear anything and I don’t understand how that’s possible.
I scowl in Eli’s direction. “An accident? What happened to you was an accident?”
Eli shrugs. “I don’t remember. We have to take your grandparents’ word for it.”
My eyes slam shut. I told the truth, Oz told the truth and the doctor told the police officer that with trauma like Eli’s it isn’t unusual that he’d forget the moments leading up to the event.
The detective shuts his notebook and asks again, “Did they actually threaten Eli or you? Not how you felt, did they say specific words?”
I swallow the lump in my throat. “No.”
“You left before the incident happened.”
“Yes.”
The officer addresses the lawyer. “We’ll let you know if we need anything else.”
And he leaves. Just like that. Goes. Another tear slips down my face.
“Jeff and I would appreciate a few minutes alone with Emily,” Eli states.
