Only His
Page 21
He drew back. “Go ahead,” he said. “Yell at me.”
A second later, conversation resumed around them. She was sure it was mostly forced, as people tried to listen without listening.
“I don’t yell,” she told him, then walked toward the storeroom.
He followed.
When they were inside, she flipped on the lights then closed the door, giving them a little more privacy. He moved toward her, but she held up her hand to stop him.
“Wait.”
“No.” He sounded firm and his expression was determined. “I’m not going anywhere, Jo. I’m not that kind of guy. I like you. I’m just asking for the chance for you to like me, too.”
He spoke as if he meant it, which was damned unfair. How was she supposed to resist a line like that? Except it wasn’t a line, which made the whole thing worse. And amazing.
“You are going somewhere,” she reminded him. “When the resort is done, you’re leaving.”
He swore under his breath. “Sure. That’s years away. You’ll be tired of me by then. If not, we’ll figure something out. I can learn to deal blackjack.”
His easy discussion of the future floored her. How could he say those things, imply that this was more than just a night of sex?
He stared into her eyes. “I’m not that guy.”
The implication being she was worried about “that guy.” She wondered what he’d heard. Which of the various rumors had been shared with him. There were so many and everyone had his or her favorites.
He thought she was worried about him leaving. That she was afraid of falling in love and being abandoned. If only he knew the truth. His leaving wasn’t her problem. He wasn’t her problem. The trouble went much deeper than that.
“No one hit me,” she told him flatly. “In case that’s what you were thinking.”
His mouth twisted. “Good to know. Now I don’t have to hunt the bastard down and beat the shit out of him.”
She was pretty sure he meant it. That he was the kind of man who protected what was his. A good man. Someone she in no way deserved.
“I don’t want forever,” she told him. “I’m only interested in right now.”
“I can do now.”
Maybe, but he wasn’t looking for a fling, she thought with a certainty she couldn’t explain. He wanted more than a night. She wasn’t sure she could promise that, but she also wasn’t sure she could resist what he offered.
She thought about what it would feel like to be with him, to have him hold her, and she ached. Some of the longing was about sex, but most of it was about connecting in a way she hadn’t allowed herself in years.
“I have a cat,” she told him.
“Everyone has a flaw.”
She smiled. “He’s a pretty cool cat. You’re going to like him.” She pulled her keys out of her jeans pocket and handed them over, then gave him her address. “I’ll be done here in about an hour.”
He took the keys, then leaned in and lightly kissed her.
“You can trust me,” he whispered, before he straightened and walked out.
Trusting him wasn’t the problem, she thought, watching him go. The real question was whether or not he could trust her.
NEVADA WANTED to spend the weekend avoiding Tucker. She wasn’t sure she could explain the logic to him, but it made sense to her, and that was what mattered. Not that it was an issue, because he was nowhere to be seen. That was very annoying. Shouldn’t he have come looking for her? After all, they’d had sex in the trailer. Conventional wisdom required a conversation after that. On a different topic, shouldn’t he want to know how things were going with Cat?
Or was that where he was? With Cat, in her bed, restarting his obsessive relationship with the other woman.
Even though she didn’t want to think about the two of them together, Nevada kept getting herself worked up over the possibility. She tried to put her energy to good use by cleaning her place and taking long walks in town. By Sunday afternoon, she was ready to jump out of her skin.
She was on the verge of going for a long run, a truly desperate measure considering she rarely exercised and never ran anywhere, when someone knocked on her door.
Tucker, she thought in relief. Having him to yell at would make her feel much better. Then he could tell her he was sorry and they could figure out what they were going to do with Cat.
She crossed to her door, pulled it open and stared at the Devil herself.
“Am I interrupting?” Cat asked, strolling inside. “Those boys downstairs are delicious. I met them both.”
“Cody and Ryan?”
“Yes.” Cat walked through the living room. “Oh, this place is wonderful. I want to live here.”
Words to cause Nevada’s insides to turn to ice. She shook that off and dealt with the more pressing problem.
“Cody and Ryan are in college.”
“I know.”
“They both started young because they’re really smart, so even though they’re in graduate programs, I’m not sure they’re more than twenty.”
Cat touched a small glass bowl on a shelf, then ran her hands over several books. “You’re sweet to worry. They’re adults. Let it go.”
Nevada felt vaguely responsible for them. She didn’t want Cat mucking around with their lives, but wasn’t sure what she could do to prevent anything from happening. It wasn’t as if either of the guys would listen. Cat was irresistible.
Even dressed casually in jeans, low boots and a dark purple sweater, she radiated an energy that was difficult to describe and impossible to ignore. There was something about the way she moved, as if she were so new to this world that every part of it was an exciting discovery.
Cat put down the book she’d been holding.
“What are you doing now?” she asked. “Whatever it is, you can do it later. Come on. I want to see your town.” She held out her hand, as if expecting Nevada to take it.
“Um, sure. I can show you around.” Nevada collected keys and her cell phone, then stuck a few dollars in her pocket.
They went out onto the street.
“What would you like to see first?”
“Whatever matters most to you. What places are special?”
Not your typical stroll, Nevada thought, heading for the park.
The day was sunny but cool. Children played by the lake, feeding the ducks. Parents watched from the benches. To the south, several young boys played soccer. To the north, by the trees, couples cuddled on blankets.
“The first known residents of the area were the women of the Máa-zib tribe,” Nevada said.
Cat nodded. “I’ve read about them. A very powerful and artistic group of women. They were known for their intricate work with gold.”
“I didn’t know that,” Nevada said.
“I’ve seen several pieces in different museums.” She linked arms with Nevada. “The Gold Museum, otherwise known as El Museo del Oro in Bogotá, Colombia, has a large exhibit. I could spend hours there. You should come with me to see it.”
“I’m busy with work now, but thanks for asking.”
Cat smiled. “Always so shy. I remember that, too. From what I can tell, life has been kind to you. So why do you resist new experiences?”
Nevada pulled free and stepped back. “That’s not true. I like new things.”
Cat raised her perfect eyebrows. “Do you? Give me an example?”
“I have a new job.”
“In the town where you’ve always lived, working for someone you’ve known for years. You are like a little bird, afraid to leave the nest.”
“You don’t know me well enough to make that kind of judgment.”
“Am I wrong?”
Nevada raised her chin. “Yes. You are.”
She spoke defiantly, but with a worrisome suspicion that Cat might be right. She’d never been especially adventurous. Not that everyone had to be. Maybe she should change that.
“I like my life,” she added. “I like having my family around me and keeping the same friends. You’re always on the go. Are you running to something or from something? What are you afraid you’ll find if you settle in one place?”
Cat leaned back her head and laughed, then linked arms with Nevada again.
“This is what I’ve missed. You stand up to me. No one does that.”
“Because you’re so transcendent?” Nevada asked, only a little sarcastically.
“That and fear.”
“At least you’re honest.”
“I can be when it suits me. What about you? Are you honest?”
“Mostly.”
“Are you with Tucker?”
Of all the questions for Cat to ask, she thought, doing her best to keep her worry from showing. If she said yes, she would not only be overstating what was going on but she might be challenging Cat. Nevada didn’t think that was a competition she could win. If she said no, Cat might decide to go after Tucker again. Either way, Nevada lost.
But if he was so easily persuaded to return to a disastrous relationship, then he wasn’t anyone she wanted to be with.
Cat stopped and faced her. “It wasn’t supposed to be a difficult question.”
“I know. It’s complicated.”
“The best things in life are simple.” Cat stared into her eyes. “Like your love of this town and the lifestyle it gives you. You’re right, I am running all the time. Running to find inspiration. Running because if I stop I don’t know what I’ll find. Running because the going, the back and forth, keeps me from admitting that I’m alone.”
For the first time since meeting Cat ten years ago, Nevada knew the other woman was speaking from the heart.
“I’m sorry,” she whispered.
Cat squeezed her arm. “I’m a world-famous artist who is extremely wealthy. I’ll be fine.”
Nevada smiled, because that was expected. Inside she wondered if Cat had ever been fine or if all the bravado was an act.
“Now,” her friend said, “show me the rest. There must be a town square and I insist on seeing it. Then we’ll go to Starbucks and order a drink that comes with whipped cream.”
Nevada nodded. “That sounds perfect.”
TUCKER HAD ENDURED the incessant whistling for the entire morning. But when Will came back after lunch, still making the noise, Tucker turned on him.
“Enough. You’re happy. We get it.”
Will grinned. “Someone’s not getting any. Too bad. Life is a whole lot nicer when there’s a woman around.”
“Jo?”
Will shrugged. “I’m not the type to kiss and tell.”
“Sure you are. It has to be Jo. Things must be going well.” Not that he begrudged his friend some happiness. If Jo was his type, then good for him. “Just give me a break on the whistling.”
“I’ll do my best.” Will leaned back in his chair and propped his feet on his desk. “I’m starting to really like this town. It’s a nice place to settle down.”
“What would you know about that?”
“More than you. I grew up in one place, at least for the first fifteen years of my life. There were good things about it. Friends.”
Tucker knew enough about Will’s past to guess that the bad had come very close to outweighing anything positive.
“You sure you want to be talking like that after a single weekend with Jo?”
“I’m not making any decisions right now. I’m considering my possibilities.”
“What are the possibilities of you doing work?”
Will laughed and straightened, slamming his boots against the floor of the trailer. “Talk nice to me and they’re pretty decent.”
Tucker went over the timetable for the week. Work-wise, they were right on schedule. With a project this big, there were bound to be delays. They were built into the project costs and projections. His goal was to make sure he didn’t need to use them.
From outside he heard a couple of guys arguing. Before he’d even made it to the door, the sound of a female voice cut through. By the time he got outside, both men were shuffling their feet, looking sheepish.
“I thought so,” Nevada told them. “This isn’t going to happen again, is it?”
The men shook their heads and walked away.
“Want to tell me what happened?” he asked.
Nevada glanced at him. “Nope. All taken care of. That’s why you pay me the big bucks.”
He hadn’t seen her in a few days. Not since Cat had arrived. Or more importantly, not since their wild and satisfying encounter in the trailer.
That she hadn’t wanted to talk about, he realized. Isn’t that what women did? Talk about it after the fact? Endlessly?
“Everything else okay?” he asked, aware there were several guys within earshot.
“Of course.”
“I was gone this weekend. With Josh. We went on a hundred-mile bike ride.” His legs were still protesting the unusual activity. “I probably should have said something.” He cleared his throat. “In case you needed to talk to me about work.”
“Thanks for the news flash.” She seemed amused by his statement. “I stayed in town. With Cat.”
“On purpose?”
“It was fine. She’s different.”
“I’ll say.”
He wanted to tell her that he was over Cat. That she didn’t matter to him, but he still hadn’t been alone with her and couldn’t be completely sure. Even if he was sure, he couldn’t figure out how to get that across in such a public setting. Asking Nevada into the trailer wouldn’t help because Will was in there.
A second later, conversation resumed around them. She was sure it was mostly forced, as people tried to listen without listening.
“I don’t yell,” she told him, then walked toward the storeroom.
He followed.
When they were inside, she flipped on the lights then closed the door, giving them a little more privacy. He moved toward her, but she held up her hand to stop him.
“Wait.”
“No.” He sounded firm and his expression was determined. “I’m not going anywhere, Jo. I’m not that kind of guy. I like you. I’m just asking for the chance for you to like me, too.”
He spoke as if he meant it, which was damned unfair. How was she supposed to resist a line like that? Except it wasn’t a line, which made the whole thing worse. And amazing.
“You are going somewhere,” she reminded him. “When the resort is done, you’re leaving.”
He swore under his breath. “Sure. That’s years away. You’ll be tired of me by then. If not, we’ll figure something out. I can learn to deal blackjack.”
His easy discussion of the future floored her. How could he say those things, imply that this was more than just a night of sex?
He stared into her eyes. “I’m not that guy.”
The implication being she was worried about “that guy.” She wondered what he’d heard. Which of the various rumors had been shared with him. There were so many and everyone had his or her favorites.
He thought she was worried about him leaving. That she was afraid of falling in love and being abandoned. If only he knew the truth. His leaving wasn’t her problem. He wasn’t her problem. The trouble went much deeper than that.
“No one hit me,” she told him flatly. “In case that’s what you were thinking.”
His mouth twisted. “Good to know. Now I don’t have to hunt the bastard down and beat the shit out of him.”
She was pretty sure he meant it. That he was the kind of man who protected what was his. A good man. Someone she in no way deserved.
“I don’t want forever,” she told him. “I’m only interested in right now.”
“I can do now.”
Maybe, but he wasn’t looking for a fling, she thought with a certainty she couldn’t explain. He wanted more than a night. She wasn’t sure she could promise that, but she also wasn’t sure she could resist what he offered.
She thought about what it would feel like to be with him, to have him hold her, and she ached. Some of the longing was about sex, but most of it was about connecting in a way she hadn’t allowed herself in years.
“I have a cat,” she told him.
“Everyone has a flaw.”
She smiled. “He’s a pretty cool cat. You’re going to like him.” She pulled her keys out of her jeans pocket and handed them over, then gave him her address. “I’ll be done here in about an hour.”
He took the keys, then leaned in and lightly kissed her.
“You can trust me,” he whispered, before he straightened and walked out.
Trusting him wasn’t the problem, she thought, watching him go. The real question was whether or not he could trust her.
NEVADA WANTED to spend the weekend avoiding Tucker. She wasn’t sure she could explain the logic to him, but it made sense to her, and that was what mattered. Not that it was an issue, because he was nowhere to be seen. That was very annoying. Shouldn’t he have come looking for her? After all, they’d had sex in the trailer. Conventional wisdom required a conversation after that. On a different topic, shouldn’t he want to know how things were going with Cat?
Or was that where he was? With Cat, in her bed, restarting his obsessive relationship with the other woman.
Even though she didn’t want to think about the two of them together, Nevada kept getting herself worked up over the possibility. She tried to put her energy to good use by cleaning her place and taking long walks in town. By Sunday afternoon, she was ready to jump out of her skin.
She was on the verge of going for a long run, a truly desperate measure considering she rarely exercised and never ran anywhere, when someone knocked on her door.
Tucker, she thought in relief. Having him to yell at would make her feel much better. Then he could tell her he was sorry and they could figure out what they were going to do with Cat.
She crossed to her door, pulled it open and stared at the Devil herself.
“Am I interrupting?” Cat asked, strolling inside. “Those boys downstairs are delicious. I met them both.”
“Cody and Ryan?”
“Yes.” Cat walked through the living room. “Oh, this place is wonderful. I want to live here.”
Words to cause Nevada’s insides to turn to ice. She shook that off and dealt with the more pressing problem.
“Cody and Ryan are in college.”
“I know.”
“They both started young because they’re really smart, so even though they’re in graduate programs, I’m not sure they’re more than twenty.”
Cat touched a small glass bowl on a shelf, then ran her hands over several books. “You’re sweet to worry. They’re adults. Let it go.”
Nevada felt vaguely responsible for them. She didn’t want Cat mucking around with their lives, but wasn’t sure what she could do to prevent anything from happening. It wasn’t as if either of the guys would listen. Cat was irresistible.
Even dressed casually in jeans, low boots and a dark purple sweater, she radiated an energy that was difficult to describe and impossible to ignore. There was something about the way she moved, as if she were so new to this world that every part of it was an exciting discovery.
Cat put down the book she’d been holding.
“What are you doing now?” she asked. “Whatever it is, you can do it later. Come on. I want to see your town.” She held out her hand, as if expecting Nevada to take it.
“Um, sure. I can show you around.” Nevada collected keys and her cell phone, then stuck a few dollars in her pocket.
They went out onto the street.
“What would you like to see first?”
“Whatever matters most to you. What places are special?”
Not your typical stroll, Nevada thought, heading for the park.
The day was sunny but cool. Children played by the lake, feeding the ducks. Parents watched from the benches. To the south, several young boys played soccer. To the north, by the trees, couples cuddled on blankets.
“The first known residents of the area were the women of the Máa-zib tribe,” Nevada said.
Cat nodded. “I’ve read about them. A very powerful and artistic group of women. They were known for their intricate work with gold.”
“I didn’t know that,” Nevada said.
“I’ve seen several pieces in different museums.” She linked arms with Nevada. “The Gold Museum, otherwise known as El Museo del Oro in Bogotá, Colombia, has a large exhibit. I could spend hours there. You should come with me to see it.”
“I’m busy with work now, but thanks for asking.”
Cat smiled. “Always so shy. I remember that, too. From what I can tell, life has been kind to you. So why do you resist new experiences?”
Nevada pulled free and stepped back. “That’s not true. I like new things.”
Cat raised her perfect eyebrows. “Do you? Give me an example?”
“I have a new job.”
“In the town where you’ve always lived, working for someone you’ve known for years. You are like a little bird, afraid to leave the nest.”
“You don’t know me well enough to make that kind of judgment.”
“Am I wrong?”
Nevada raised her chin. “Yes. You are.”
She spoke defiantly, but with a worrisome suspicion that Cat might be right. She’d never been especially adventurous. Not that everyone had to be. Maybe she should change that.
“I like my life,” she added. “I like having my family around me and keeping the same friends. You’re always on the go. Are you running to something or from something? What are you afraid you’ll find if you settle in one place?”
Cat leaned back her head and laughed, then linked arms with Nevada again.
“This is what I’ve missed. You stand up to me. No one does that.”
“Because you’re so transcendent?” Nevada asked, only a little sarcastically.
“That and fear.”
“At least you’re honest.”
“I can be when it suits me. What about you? Are you honest?”
“Mostly.”
“Are you with Tucker?”
Of all the questions for Cat to ask, she thought, doing her best to keep her worry from showing. If she said yes, she would not only be overstating what was going on but she might be challenging Cat. Nevada didn’t think that was a competition she could win. If she said no, Cat might decide to go after Tucker again. Either way, Nevada lost.
But if he was so easily persuaded to return to a disastrous relationship, then he wasn’t anyone she wanted to be with.
Cat stopped and faced her. “It wasn’t supposed to be a difficult question.”
“I know. It’s complicated.”
“The best things in life are simple.” Cat stared into her eyes. “Like your love of this town and the lifestyle it gives you. You’re right, I am running all the time. Running to find inspiration. Running because if I stop I don’t know what I’ll find. Running because the going, the back and forth, keeps me from admitting that I’m alone.”
For the first time since meeting Cat ten years ago, Nevada knew the other woman was speaking from the heart.
“I’m sorry,” she whispered.
Cat squeezed her arm. “I’m a world-famous artist who is extremely wealthy. I’ll be fine.”
Nevada smiled, because that was expected. Inside she wondered if Cat had ever been fine or if all the bravado was an act.
“Now,” her friend said, “show me the rest. There must be a town square and I insist on seeing it. Then we’ll go to Starbucks and order a drink that comes with whipped cream.”
Nevada nodded. “That sounds perfect.”
TUCKER HAD ENDURED the incessant whistling for the entire morning. But when Will came back after lunch, still making the noise, Tucker turned on him.
“Enough. You’re happy. We get it.”
Will grinned. “Someone’s not getting any. Too bad. Life is a whole lot nicer when there’s a woman around.”
“Jo?”
Will shrugged. “I’m not the type to kiss and tell.”
“Sure you are. It has to be Jo. Things must be going well.” Not that he begrudged his friend some happiness. If Jo was his type, then good for him. “Just give me a break on the whistling.”
“I’ll do my best.” Will leaned back in his chair and propped his feet on his desk. “I’m starting to really like this town. It’s a nice place to settle down.”
“What would you know about that?”
“More than you. I grew up in one place, at least for the first fifteen years of my life. There were good things about it. Friends.”
Tucker knew enough about Will’s past to guess that the bad had come very close to outweighing anything positive.
“You sure you want to be talking like that after a single weekend with Jo?”
“I’m not making any decisions right now. I’m considering my possibilities.”
“What are the possibilities of you doing work?”
Will laughed and straightened, slamming his boots against the floor of the trailer. “Talk nice to me and they’re pretty decent.”
Tucker went over the timetable for the week. Work-wise, they were right on schedule. With a project this big, there were bound to be delays. They were built into the project costs and projections. His goal was to make sure he didn’t need to use them.
From outside he heard a couple of guys arguing. Before he’d even made it to the door, the sound of a female voice cut through. By the time he got outside, both men were shuffling their feet, looking sheepish.
“I thought so,” Nevada told them. “This isn’t going to happen again, is it?”
The men shook their heads and walked away.
“Want to tell me what happened?” he asked.
Nevada glanced at him. “Nope. All taken care of. That’s why you pay me the big bucks.”
He hadn’t seen her in a few days. Not since Cat had arrived. Or more importantly, not since their wild and satisfying encounter in the trailer.
That she hadn’t wanted to talk about, he realized. Isn’t that what women did? Talk about it after the fact? Endlessly?
“Everything else okay?” he asked, aware there were several guys within earshot.
“Of course.”
“I was gone this weekend. With Josh. We went on a hundred-mile bike ride.” His legs were still protesting the unusual activity. “I probably should have said something.” He cleared his throat. “In case you needed to talk to me about work.”
“Thanks for the news flash.” She seemed amused by his statement. “I stayed in town. With Cat.”
“On purpose?”
“It was fine. She’s different.”
“I’ll say.”
He wanted to tell her that he was over Cat. That she didn’t matter to him, but he still hadn’t been alone with her and couldn’t be completely sure. Even if he was sure, he couldn’t figure out how to get that across in such a public setting. Asking Nevada into the trailer wouldn’t help because Will was in there.