Only You
Page 54
Mia glanced at me. “What would you wish for?”
I smiled ruefully, dropping my gaze to my boots crunching on the gravel. “Tonight, I think I’d have wished for some sign that I’m not crazy—something to show me that the kind of love I’m looking for is actually possible. Not just a dream.”
Mia put her arm around my shoulders and gave me a squeeze.
We passed a couple guest cottages before she guided me off the main path down a narrower one that led right to the door of an adorable little one-story stone structure that mimicked the look of the winery and their house, right down to the steeply pitched roofline and slate blue shutters. At the front door, she pulled out her phone again. “Well, I don’t have any stars to offer you, but it is eleven-eleven.” She showed me the screen. “You could still make a wish.”
I sighed, feeling a little embarrassed I still believed in that stuff. “Nah, it’s silly. My wishes never come true.”
“You never know,” she said. “Better do it, just in case.”
Sighing, I closed my eyes and made the wish, altering it a little. If you’re out there, love of my life, come find me.
When I opened them, Mia was frantically patting the pockets of her sweater. “Oh my God, you’re not going to believe this. I forgot the key.”
“No worries,” I said. “I do it all the time, and Nate always has to rescue me. I’ll walk back with you.”
“No sense in both of us going. Your boots have heels, I’m in flats. Be right back.” Without another word, she took off up the gravel path, leaving me alone in the dark.
It wasn’t even twenty seconds later, I heard footsteps again—but they weren’t hers. These were heavier, slower. I squinted at the figure coming toward me, someone taller and bigger and broader than Mia. Before I even had time to get nervous, I heard his voice.
“Heard you were locked out.”
“Nate?” I blinked as he got closer, but he didn’t disappear. He wore a suit and tie like he’d just come from work, and my heart was pounding at the sight of him. “What are you doing here?”
“Well, it was the craziest thing. I looked at the clock and noticed it was eleven-eleven, so I made a wish.”
I could hardly breathe. “What did you wish for?”
He was right in front of me now. “I wished for another chance to tell the most beautiful girl in the world that I love her, that I’m sorry, and that even though I don’t deserve her, I hope she’ll believe me when I tell her she’s the only one for me, and I never should have let her go.”
Chills shimmied up my spine. “So here’s your chance. Tell me.”
He rested his forehead on mine and lowered his voice. “Only you, Emme. And always you.”
I wanted to believe him, but I was scared. Placing my hands on his chest, I pressed back. “What’s changed, Nate? How can I trust that you won’t break my heart again?”
He slipped his hands around my waist and drew me flush against him, solid and secure. “What’s changed is that I realized how wrong I was to think I could control my feelings for you. I thought it made me a stronger man, a better man, if I never loved anyone, because I saw love as a weakness. Something to be feared. I always thought I’d be happier alone, but I wasn’t. Part of the reason I told myself never to touch you was because deep inside, I wanted it too much. It scared me.”
“I wanted you, too,” I confessed, “but more than that, I wanted to be special to you. I didn’t want to be like those girls leaving your apartment Sunday mornings.”
He grimaced, his eyes closing briefly. “You were never going to be that. I was struggling with what I felt for you when Paisley came along. You were there for me the whole time, every step of the way. I’d have been so lost without you.”
“You had it in you to be a good dad, I knew you did. You just needed confidence.”
“I needed you. I’m so much better because of you. I get it now, Emme, what you said about alpha males acting the way they do because they have someone they want to protect. For too long, all I cared about protecting was myself. Now, all I care about is you and Paisley, and there is nothing I wouldn’t do for you. Nothing. And I’m not afraid to show it.”
“Or accept it?” I challenged him. “I love big, Nate. I can’t help it. And I don’t want to hold back.”
“I want it all, everything you have to give.” He squeezed me. “Tell me it’s not too late.”
“It’s not too—”
He crushed his mouth to mine, lifting me right off the ground. His body bowed back, and mine curved along his. “I’m going to make you happy, Emme. I promise. For as long as you’ll let me.”
Maybe I shouldn’t have believed it, but I did.
He set me on my feet and pulled a key from his pocket. “Here’s the key to your cottage. If you want to spend the night with me, I’ll stay. If you ask me to go, I’ll go.”
“The only thing I’m going to ask you is how you got this key in the first place.” I took it from him, and opened the cottage door. “But that conversation can wait.”
He grinned. “I’m so glad to hear you say that.”
With the door barely closed behind us, we came together, clinging and clutching, desperate to make up for lost time and prove to one another we’d meant what we said. I could feel in Nate’s kiss, in his touch, in his body that he loved me without reservation, that he’d broken free of whatever chains had been holding him back. He’d always been a powerful, aggressive lover, but there was something different this time. He was more passionate, more uninhibited, more unguarded than he’d ever been before—especially with words.
Over and over again, he told me he loved me.
Whispered it against my lips as we tore the clothes from each other’s bodies. Murmured it between kisses across my breasts, down my stomach, along every limb. Spoke the words as he carried me to the far end of the cottage where the king-size bed awaited. I realized he must have gone in ahead of time, because dozens of lit candles were scattered around the room, flickering softly in the dark.
He laid me on the bed and covered my body with his, and I opened everything to him—my arms, my lips, my legs, my heart. I, too, held nothing back. I rolled with all my might, forcing him onto his back so I could rain kisses over his face and chest, run my hands along the hard lines of his body, look him in the eye as I lowered myself upon him, his cock gliding slowly inside me.
“I wished for you,” I told him when he was buried to the hilt. “For this, for us.”
“I did too.” He sat up so we were chest to chest, mouth to mouth, arms wrapped around each other. “The very first night when you told me to make a wish, I wished that the next man you fell in love with would love you back the way you deserved. And he does.” We began to move together, our bodies a perfect fit, our rhythm in perfect synch. “I swear to God, he does.”
Eventually, he took over, tipping me onto my back and driving into me harder and faster and deeper—so deep I gasped for air and cried out in shock and arched up desperately beneath him, my body craving both the pleasure and pain he wrought.
But mostly, I craved that elongated moment of shared bliss, the final seconds of the dizzying ascent, the agonizing hover on the edge of the peak, the feverish breath as we took each other over, the exquisite spiral of the pulsing free fall, our bodies entwined, inseparable, one.
“Tell me again,” I whispered breathlessly as our hearts refused to calm down, even after his body and mine were sapped and his chest was heavy on mine.
He picked his head up and looked down at me. Brushed the hair from my face. “I love you. Only you. Always you.”
I smiled. “Told you wishes come true.”
“I can’t believe it,” I said, shaking my head. “So it was Stella who convinced you?” We were lying in bed late Friday morning, Nate on his back, me propped on an elbow on his chest. We’d gotten very little sleep, but I felt energized and refreshed. Alive.
“Kind of. I mean, I knew I was miserable without you and that I’d fucked things up, but if I hadn’t seen her at the grocery store near that house I told you about, I don’t know that we’d be where we are right now.” He tucked my hair behind my ear. “You were right about her. She gets underneath the surface fast.”
I smiled ruefully, dropping my gaze to my boots crunching on the gravel. “Tonight, I think I’d have wished for some sign that I’m not crazy—something to show me that the kind of love I’m looking for is actually possible. Not just a dream.”
Mia put her arm around my shoulders and gave me a squeeze.
We passed a couple guest cottages before she guided me off the main path down a narrower one that led right to the door of an adorable little one-story stone structure that mimicked the look of the winery and their house, right down to the steeply pitched roofline and slate blue shutters. At the front door, she pulled out her phone again. “Well, I don’t have any stars to offer you, but it is eleven-eleven.” She showed me the screen. “You could still make a wish.”
I sighed, feeling a little embarrassed I still believed in that stuff. “Nah, it’s silly. My wishes never come true.”
“You never know,” she said. “Better do it, just in case.”
Sighing, I closed my eyes and made the wish, altering it a little. If you’re out there, love of my life, come find me.
When I opened them, Mia was frantically patting the pockets of her sweater. “Oh my God, you’re not going to believe this. I forgot the key.”
“No worries,” I said. “I do it all the time, and Nate always has to rescue me. I’ll walk back with you.”
“No sense in both of us going. Your boots have heels, I’m in flats. Be right back.” Without another word, she took off up the gravel path, leaving me alone in the dark.
It wasn’t even twenty seconds later, I heard footsteps again—but they weren’t hers. These were heavier, slower. I squinted at the figure coming toward me, someone taller and bigger and broader than Mia. Before I even had time to get nervous, I heard his voice.
“Heard you were locked out.”
“Nate?” I blinked as he got closer, but he didn’t disappear. He wore a suit and tie like he’d just come from work, and my heart was pounding at the sight of him. “What are you doing here?”
“Well, it was the craziest thing. I looked at the clock and noticed it was eleven-eleven, so I made a wish.”
I could hardly breathe. “What did you wish for?”
He was right in front of me now. “I wished for another chance to tell the most beautiful girl in the world that I love her, that I’m sorry, and that even though I don’t deserve her, I hope she’ll believe me when I tell her she’s the only one for me, and I never should have let her go.”
Chills shimmied up my spine. “So here’s your chance. Tell me.”
He rested his forehead on mine and lowered his voice. “Only you, Emme. And always you.”
I wanted to believe him, but I was scared. Placing my hands on his chest, I pressed back. “What’s changed, Nate? How can I trust that you won’t break my heart again?”
He slipped his hands around my waist and drew me flush against him, solid and secure. “What’s changed is that I realized how wrong I was to think I could control my feelings for you. I thought it made me a stronger man, a better man, if I never loved anyone, because I saw love as a weakness. Something to be feared. I always thought I’d be happier alone, but I wasn’t. Part of the reason I told myself never to touch you was because deep inside, I wanted it too much. It scared me.”
“I wanted you, too,” I confessed, “but more than that, I wanted to be special to you. I didn’t want to be like those girls leaving your apartment Sunday mornings.”
He grimaced, his eyes closing briefly. “You were never going to be that. I was struggling with what I felt for you when Paisley came along. You were there for me the whole time, every step of the way. I’d have been so lost without you.”
“You had it in you to be a good dad, I knew you did. You just needed confidence.”
“I needed you. I’m so much better because of you. I get it now, Emme, what you said about alpha males acting the way they do because they have someone they want to protect. For too long, all I cared about protecting was myself. Now, all I care about is you and Paisley, and there is nothing I wouldn’t do for you. Nothing. And I’m not afraid to show it.”
“Or accept it?” I challenged him. “I love big, Nate. I can’t help it. And I don’t want to hold back.”
“I want it all, everything you have to give.” He squeezed me. “Tell me it’s not too late.”
“It’s not too—”
He crushed his mouth to mine, lifting me right off the ground. His body bowed back, and mine curved along his. “I’m going to make you happy, Emme. I promise. For as long as you’ll let me.”
Maybe I shouldn’t have believed it, but I did.
He set me on my feet and pulled a key from his pocket. “Here’s the key to your cottage. If you want to spend the night with me, I’ll stay. If you ask me to go, I’ll go.”
“The only thing I’m going to ask you is how you got this key in the first place.” I took it from him, and opened the cottage door. “But that conversation can wait.”
He grinned. “I’m so glad to hear you say that.”
With the door barely closed behind us, we came together, clinging and clutching, desperate to make up for lost time and prove to one another we’d meant what we said. I could feel in Nate’s kiss, in his touch, in his body that he loved me without reservation, that he’d broken free of whatever chains had been holding him back. He’d always been a powerful, aggressive lover, but there was something different this time. He was more passionate, more uninhibited, more unguarded than he’d ever been before—especially with words.
Over and over again, he told me he loved me.
Whispered it against my lips as we tore the clothes from each other’s bodies. Murmured it between kisses across my breasts, down my stomach, along every limb. Spoke the words as he carried me to the far end of the cottage where the king-size bed awaited. I realized he must have gone in ahead of time, because dozens of lit candles were scattered around the room, flickering softly in the dark.
He laid me on the bed and covered my body with his, and I opened everything to him—my arms, my lips, my legs, my heart. I, too, held nothing back. I rolled with all my might, forcing him onto his back so I could rain kisses over his face and chest, run my hands along the hard lines of his body, look him in the eye as I lowered myself upon him, his cock gliding slowly inside me.
“I wished for you,” I told him when he was buried to the hilt. “For this, for us.”
“I did too.” He sat up so we were chest to chest, mouth to mouth, arms wrapped around each other. “The very first night when you told me to make a wish, I wished that the next man you fell in love with would love you back the way you deserved. And he does.” We began to move together, our bodies a perfect fit, our rhythm in perfect synch. “I swear to God, he does.”
Eventually, he took over, tipping me onto my back and driving into me harder and faster and deeper—so deep I gasped for air and cried out in shock and arched up desperately beneath him, my body craving both the pleasure and pain he wrought.
But mostly, I craved that elongated moment of shared bliss, the final seconds of the dizzying ascent, the agonizing hover on the edge of the peak, the feverish breath as we took each other over, the exquisite spiral of the pulsing free fall, our bodies entwined, inseparable, one.
“Tell me again,” I whispered breathlessly as our hearts refused to calm down, even after his body and mine were sapped and his chest was heavy on mine.
He picked his head up and looked down at me. Brushed the hair from my face. “I love you. Only you. Always you.”
I smiled. “Told you wishes come true.”
“I can’t believe it,” I said, shaking my head. “So it was Stella who convinced you?” We were lying in bed late Friday morning, Nate on his back, me propped on an elbow on his chest. We’d gotten very little sleep, but I felt energized and refreshed. Alive.
“Kind of. I mean, I knew I was miserable without you and that I’d fucked things up, but if I hadn’t seen her at the grocery store near that house I told you about, I don’t know that we’d be where we are right now.” He tucked my hair behind my ear. “You were right about her. She gets underneath the surface fast.”
