Only Yours
Page 6
They came to a stop at the corner. Montana walked over to push the Walk button, then returned to Simon’s side. “Where were you before you came to Fool’s Gold? I heard you travel around a lot.”
The pedestrian signal changed and she and Simon started across the street. As they reached the other side, he stepped around her.
“I was in India.”
“That counts as travel,” she admitted. “You go all around the world?”
“I go where I’m needed. I operate on whomever needs my help the most. Mostly children. But adults as well. After I leave here, I’m set to go to Peru.”
That sounded very altruistic. “So you’re a giver?”
“No.”
She waited, but he didn’t say anything else. There was no sign of the smile and she wondered if she’d annoyed him, or crossed some invisible line.
“Burns are my specialty,” he said.
“You must get lonely, always being in a different place. What about family?”
“I have my work. That’s enough.”
It couldn’t possibly be enough, she thought. He was a difficult man to understand. Obviously he was very gifted. His work was demanding and, from what she had seen, he was relentless when it came to taking care of his patients. But who took care of him?
No, no. Don’t go there, she told herself. No rescuing. Simon was perfectly capable of taking care of himself. He’d been all over the world, doing amazing things. He didn’t need her and she didn’t need to make this assignment more than it was.
She’d had three serious boyfriends in her life. A guy back in high school, one in college and one shortly after. All three of them had ended things after making it clear she wasn’t good enough. She hadn’t been pretty enough or smart enough or ambitious enough. Was she really looking for an instant replay on emotional pain?
“Do you have a home base anywhere?” she asked.
“Los Angeles.”
She wrinkled her nose. “I lived there for a while.” With guy number three.
Simon glanced at her. “You don’t sound as if you liked it very much.”
“I didn’t. I couldn’t fit in—my boyfriend was a disaster.” She stopped in front of the Fox and Hound restaurant and faced Simon. “He was a doctor, too. Or he was going to be. He was still in medical school.”
“What happened?”
A reasonable question. She’d set it up herself, so she had no one to blame. Thinking before speaking was an excellent characteristic, she reminded herself. One she was going to have to take up.
“We didn’t want the same things.”
Which was sort of true. The more important issue, which she wouldn’t talk about, was that he’d destroyed what little self-confidence she’d had left. She believed no one could take that away without her permission, so she knew she was also at fault. “His loss.”
The words surprised her.
“Thank you.” She tilted her head. “You’re different from how you were before.”
“Less stick-up-the-ass?”
She winced. “I’m sorry I said that. It was mean. You weren’t out of line. Fluffy really could have done some damage.”
“But she didn’t. Sometimes I get a little intense.”
Montana bit the inside of her mouth to keep from smiling. “I hadn’t noticed. Thank you for understanding about Fluffy. It wasn’t her fault, it was mine. Max warned me. He said she wouldn’t make it as a therapy dog, but I was determined.”
“To fulfill her therapy-dog destiny?”
Humor sparkled in Simon’s eyes. She felt herself getting a little breathless. The man could be devastating when he tried.
“I can’t save the world, so my passion is a little smaller than yours.”
“Not smaller. Different.”
There was something about the way he stared at her. As if he was hungry. She shook her head. Talk about delusions of grandeur. Simon hungry for her? On what planet? He wasn’t looking at her mouth. She must have a smudge or something.
As casually as she could, she rubbed her chin.
“Max is kind of an intriguing guy,” she said. Because her boss seemed a safer topic. “A little mysterious. No one knows where he’s from. He obviously has money. You’ve seen the facility—that doesn’t come cheap. And it’s not like the therapy-dog business pays very much. And there’s a weird coincidence with my mother. She has a tattoo on her hip. Max. My sisters and I don’t think it’s the same Max, though. That would be too strange.”
She sighed. “Too much information, right?”
“Perhaps.”
She started walking. He fell into step beside her.
“It was the tattoo. I shouldn’t have mentioned my mother has a tattoo.” She wasn’t asking a question.
But instead of answering, Simon shifted to her other side. And then it clicked.
He always made sure he kept his good side to her. However they turned or moved, she was on his right.
Her throat got tight. She willed herself not to show any emotion at all. He wouldn’t want that. She would guess he didn’t even know he was doing it. That keeping his good side to people had started when he was much younger and was now unconscious.
Once again she wondered what had happened to him. How had he been hurt and why hadn’t he taken steps to repair the damage? She didn’t know that much about reconstructive surgery, but she couldn’t help wondering if the scars could be made less noticeable.
Not that she was going to ask. Their time together today had gone well enough. She had done her duty and could now return to her regularly scheduled life. Only she didn’t want to. She’d enjoyed her afternoon with Simon much more than she’d expected. Of course, she’d done most of the talking. The only new thing she’d learned was that he had a home base in Los Angeles.
Well, crap. She’d gone on and on about an assortment of topics that had probably bored him. She wasn’t interesting enough for someone like him. No doubt he was used to women who—
They’d reached the park again. She came to a stop on the grass, close to a grove of trees, and mentally stomped her foot. No! She wasn’t going to put herself down. She wasn’t going to assume she was boring. There was nothing wrong with her, not physically or mentally or emotionally.
“Are you all right?”
She sighed. “Sorry. I was having a little discussion with myself. I’m done now.”
“Did you win the argument?”
“I wasn’t arguing.”
“You looked serious about something.”
Only her lack of self-confidence. Why were her sisters so much more secure than her? They were supposed to be identical. She should have the same genes, the same attitudes. But she didn’t.
None of which was Simon’s problem.
“I’ve kept you long enough,” she said. “You probably have a ton of things you would rather be doing this afternoon.”
He faced her, his gaze locked with hers. “Is that what you think?”
Before she could answer, before she could form words or draw breath, she found herself moving toward him. But she wasn’t making it happen. Strong hands had settled on her waist, pulling her forward.
She was caught completely off guard, barely able to process what was happening. Which was why she didn’t stop it. There wasn’t time. One second she was at a safe, socially correct distance and the next she was touching him everywhere.
Her br**sts nestled against his surprisingly well-muscled chest. Her thighs brushed his. Heat surrounded her, which was also unexpected, but nothing when compared to his mouth lowering to hers.
Shock immobilized her. Kissing? Simon was kissing her?
But it had to be happening, because she had proof. The feel of his lips on hers. The hard pressure of his mouth as he claimed her in a kiss that was forceful and demanding, yet not in the least bit scary.
He moved his mouth against hers as if discovering her. As if…desperate. Starving for whatever she offered. One of his hands tangled in her hair, his fingers warm against her scalp. The other moved up and down her back, stroking her as if she were a cat.
Shock faded and she told herself to push him away. She barely knew him. Only she didn’t want any more distance between them. Not when liquid warmth poured through her, making her feel alive and sexy and feminine.
She lightly rested her fingers on his broad shoulders, then gave herself over to the kiss. He must have sensed her surrender, as he shifted even closer and brushed his tongue against her bottom lip.
She parted her lips, wanting to know what his intimate kiss would be like. He plunged inside immediately, tasting and teasing. Shivers raced up and down her spine, following the path of his fingers. Her br**sts began to ache and she felt that telltale swelling between her legs.
She kissed him back, liking the way he responded. His body tensed and his arms tightened around her. His kiss grew more hungry, more intense. His reaction fed her own. The heat intensified until she wondered if it was possible for them to get so lost in the moment they would never be found. She’d never been the type to have sex with a stranger, but for the first time in her life she was thinking it might not be the worst idea in the world.
But before she could decide if she wanted to make the offer, Simon abruptly stepped back.
They stood a couple of feet from each other, both breathing hard. She had a feeling her eyes were just as bright with passion as his were. Her lips felt well kissed and slightly swollen. She touched her fingertips to her sensitive skin.
“Did I hurt you?” he demanded, his expression hardening.
“What? No.”
He half turned away, then faced her again. He didn’t look happy.
“I’m sorry.” The words were abrupt. “I shouldn’t have done that.”
She thought about asking why not, but thought that might send them down a road she didn’t want to travel.
“I don’t usually…” He cleared his throat. “I’m generally in control. You’ll have to take my word on that.”
“Not to worry. I believe you.” She was pleased she could speak without her voice shaking.
“There’s something about you. An attraction I can’t shake. I—” He sounded frustrated and embarrassed. “I’m sorry.”
Sure she must have heard him wrong, she held her hands up in the shape of a T. “At the risk of having you break out in hysterical laughter, are you saying you were overcome by passion and had to kiss me?”
She braced herself for mockery. Instead Simon nodded.
“I can’t explain it,” he admitted. “It’s one of those chemical things.” He looked away. “I don’t usually have this kind of reaction to a woman.”
She wanted to bask in the moment. No one had ever admitted unbridled passion for her before. Part of the reason could be that no one used the word unbridled anymore, but still.
“Why don’t you usually feel this way about a woman? Please tell me you’re not gay?”
A muscle twitched in his jaw. “No, I’m not. However, I can generally control myself sexually.”
The tone was practically ice, but the words were hot enough to make her thighs tremble.
“Not around me?”
He sighed. “No.”
Montana had no idea what to say to that. Part of her wanted to invite him back to her place. If a guy felt that strongly, she thought she should at least say thank you. Although her mother would probably tell her that a card was plenty. Part of her wondered if this was just a game. Except Simon was proud, and she doubted he would be willing to humiliate himself just to score points.
He took the decision out of her hands. “I’ve taken up enough of your time,” he said. “Thank you for showing me the town. As for the kiss, it won’t happen again. You have my word.”
With that disappointing last statement, he turned and walked away.
SIMON FOUND REFUGE in his work at the hospital. As always, dealing with his patients, planning surgery, examining healing burns kept him occupied, both physically and mentally. But every now and then, and more often than he wanted, he remembered how he’d acted with Montana.
Now, sitting in the small office he’d been given for his three-month stay, he found himself thinking about the scent of her and the feel of her in his arms. He was distracted by the remembrance of her silky hair in his hands, the sound of her laughter and the way she looked when she smiled.
Heat and need threatened to overwhelm him. Dammit all to hell, he thought grimly. Why now? Why her?
There wouldn’t be an answer. Fate was nothing if not mysterious. He simply had to accept that when he was around Montana he was going to act like an idiot. If he didn’t watch himself, he would slide past idiot status and into something more dangerous.
Now, as he stared at the chart but saw her face instead, he knew he had to find a solution. Bad enough to be stupid, but worse to be pathetic. He’d made the mistake of telling her why he’d kissed her. No doubt she felt sorry for him and was eager to stay away from him.
Normally he didn’t care what people thought of him, but for some reason, Montana’s opinion mattered. He wanted to impress her. Between his reaction to Fluffy exploding onto the ward and the kiss, he couldn’t be further off the mark.
His cell phone rang.
Simon glanced at the screen before answering, then pushed the button. “What trouble are you in now?” he asked, smiling.
“The usual,” the caller said. “Be impressed. I have cell service in Nepal.”
“I am. How’s it going, Alistair?”
The pedestrian signal changed and she and Simon started across the street. As they reached the other side, he stepped around her.
“I was in India.”
“That counts as travel,” she admitted. “You go all around the world?”
“I go where I’m needed. I operate on whomever needs my help the most. Mostly children. But adults as well. After I leave here, I’m set to go to Peru.”
That sounded very altruistic. “So you’re a giver?”
“No.”
She waited, but he didn’t say anything else. There was no sign of the smile and she wondered if she’d annoyed him, or crossed some invisible line.
“Burns are my specialty,” he said.
“You must get lonely, always being in a different place. What about family?”
“I have my work. That’s enough.”
It couldn’t possibly be enough, she thought. He was a difficult man to understand. Obviously he was very gifted. His work was demanding and, from what she had seen, he was relentless when it came to taking care of his patients. But who took care of him?
No, no. Don’t go there, she told herself. No rescuing. Simon was perfectly capable of taking care of himself. He’d been all over the world, doing amazing things. He didn’t need her and she didn’t need to make this assignment more than it was.
She’d had three serious boyfriends in her life. A guy back in high school, one in college and one shortly after. All three of them had ended things after making it clear she wasn’t good enough. She hadn’t been pretty enough or smart enough or ambitious enough. Was she really looking for an instant replay on emotional pain?
“Do you have a home base anywhere?” she asked.
“Los Angeles.”
She wrinkled her nose. “I lived there for a while.” With guy number three.
Simon glanced at her. “You don’t sound as if you liked it very much.”
“I didn’t. I couldn’t fit in—my boyfriend was a disaster.” She stopped in front of the Fox and Hound restaurant and faced Simon. “He was a doctor, too. Or he was going to be. He was still in medical school.”
“What happened?”
A reasonable question. She’d set it up herself, so she had no one to blame. Thinking before speaking was an excellent characteristic, she reminded herself. One she was going to have to take up.
“We didn’t want the same things.”
Which was sort of true. The more important issue, which she wouldn’t talk about, was that he’d destroyed what little self-confidence she’d had left. She believed no one could take that away without her permission, so she knew she was also at fault. “His loss.”
The words surprised her.
“Thank you.” She tilted her head. “You’re different from how you were before.”
“Less stick-up-the-ass?”
She winced. “I’m sorry I said that. It was mean. You weren’t out of line. Fluffy really could have done some damage.”
“But she didn’t. Sometimes I get a little intense.”
Montana bit the inside of her mouth to keep from smiling. “I hadn’t noticed. Thank you for understanding about Fluffy. It wasn’t her fault, it was mine. Max warned me. He said she wouldn’t make it as a therapy dog, but I was determined.”
“To fulfill her therapy-dog destiny?”
Humor sparkled in Simon’s eyes. She felt herself getting a little breathless. The man could be devastating when he tried.
“I can’t save the world, so my passion is a little smaller than yours.”
“Not smaller. Different.”
There was something about the way he stared at her. As if he was hungry. She shook her head. Talk about delusions of grandeur. Simon hungry for her? On what planet? He wasn’t looking at her mouth. She must have a smudge or something.
As casually as she could, she rubbed her chin.
“Max is kind of an intriguing guy,” she said. Because her boss seemed a safer topic. “A little mysterious. No one knows where he’s from. He obviously has money. You’ve seen the facility—that doesn’t come cheap. And it’s not like the therapy-dog business pays very much. And there’s a weird coincidence with my mother. She has a tattoo on her hip. Max. My sisters and I don’t think it’s the same Max, though. That would be too strange.”
She sighed. “Too much information, right?”
“Perhaps.”
She started walking. He fell into step beside her.
“It was the tattoo. I shouldn’t have mentioned my mother has a tattoo.” She wasn’t asking a question.
But instead of answering, Simon shifted to her other side. And then it clicked.
He always made sure he kept his good side to her. However they turned or moved, she was on his right.
Her throat got tight. She willed herself not to show any emotion at all. He wouldn’t want that. She would guess he didn’t even know he was doing it. That keeping his good side to people had started when he was much younger and was now unconscious.
Once again she wondered what had happened to him. How had he been hurt and why hadn’t he taken steps to repair the damage? She didn’t know that much about reconstructive surgery, but she couldn’t help wondering if the scars could be made less noticeable.
Not that she was going to ask. Their time together today had gone well enough. She had done her duty and could now return to her regularly scheduled life. Only she didn’t want to. She’d enjoyed her afternoon with Simon much more than she’d expected. Of course, she’d done most of the talking. The only new thing she’d learned was that he had a home base in Los Angeles.
Well, crap. She’d gone on and on about an assortment of topics that had probably bored him. She wasn’t interesting enough for someone like him. No doubt he was used to women who—
They’d reached the park again. She came to a stop on the grass, close to a grove of trees, and mentally stomped her foot. No! She wasn’t going to put herself down. She wasn’t going to assume she was boring. There was nothing wrong with her, not physically or mentally or emotionally.
“Are you all right?”
She sighed. “Sorry. I was having a little discussion with myself. I’m done now.”
“Did you win the argument?”
“I wasn’t arguing.”
“You looked serious about something.”
Only her lack of self-confidence. Why were her sisters so much more secure than her? They were supposed to be identical. She should have the same genes, the same attitudes. But she didn’t.
None of which was Simon’s problem.
“I’ve kept you long enough,” she said. “You probably have a ton of things you would rather be doing this afternoon.”
He faced her, his gaze locked with hers. “Is that what you think?”
Before she could answer, before she could form words or draw breath, she found herself moving toward him. But she wasn’t making it happen. Strong hands had settled on her waist, pulling her forward.
She was caught completely off guard, barely able to process what was happening. Which was why she didn’t stop it. There wasn’t time. One second she was at a safe, socially correct distance and the next she was touching him everywhere.
Her br**sts nestled against his surprisingly well-muscled chest. Her thighs brushed his. Heat surrounded her, which was also unexpected, but nothing when compared to his mouth lowering to hers.
Shock immobilized her. Kissing? Simon was kissing her?
But it had to be happening, because she had proof. The feel of his lips on hers. The hard pressure of his mouth as he claimed her in a kiss that was forceful and demanding, yet not in the least bit scary.
He moved his mouth against hers as if discovering her. As if…desperate. Starving for whatever she offered. One of his hands tangled in her hair, his fingers warm against her scalp. The other moved up and down her back, stroking her as if she were a cat.
Shock faded and she told herself to push him away. She barely knew him. Only she didn’t want any more distance between them. Not when liquid warmth poured through her, making her feel alive and sexy and feminine.
She lightly rested her fingers on his broad shoulders, then gave herself over to the kiss. He must have sensed her surrender, as he shifted even closer and brushed his tongue against her bottom lip.
She parted her lips, wanting to know what his intimate kiss would be like. He plunged inside immediately, tasting and teasing. Shivers raced up and down her spine, following the path of his fingers. Her br**sts began to ache and she felt that telltale swelling between her legs.
She kissed him back, liking the way he responded. His body tensed and his arms tightened around her. His kiss grew more hungry, more intense. His reaction fed her own. The heat intensified until she wondered if it was possible for them to get so lost in the moment they would never be found. She’d never been the type to have sex with a stranger, but for the first time in her life she was thinking it might not be the worst idea in the world.
But before she could decide if she wanted to make the offer, Simon abruptly stepped back.
They stood a couple of feet from each other, both breathing hard. She had a feeling her eyes were just as bright with passion as his were. Her lips felt well kissed and slightly swollen. She touched her fingertips to her sensitive skin.
“Did I hurt you?” he demanded, his expression hardening.
“What? No.”
He half turned away, then faced her again. He didn’t look happy.
“I’m sorry.” The words were abrupt. “I shouldn’t have done that.”
She thought about asking why not, but thought that might send them down a road she didn’t want to travel.
“I don’t usually…” He cleared his throat. “I’m generally in control. You’ll have to take my word on that.”
“Not to worry. I believe you.” She was pleased she could speak without her voice shaking.
“There’s something about you. An attraction I can’t shake. I—” He sounded frustrated and embarrassed. “I’m sorry.”
Sure she must have heard him wrong, she held her hands up in the shape of a T. “At the risk of having you break out in hysterical laughter, are you saying you were overcome by passion and had to kiss me?”
She braced herself for mockery. Instead Simon nodded.
“I can’t explain it,” he admitted. “It’s one of those chemical things.” He looked away. “I don’t usually have this kind of reaction to a woman.”
She wanted to bask in the moment. No one had ever admitted unbridled passion for her before. Part of the reason could be that no one used the word unbridled anymore, but still.
“Why don’t you usually feel this way about a woman? Please tell me you’re not gay?”
A muscle twitched in his jaw. “No, I’m not. However, I can generally control myself sexually.”
The tone was practically ice, but the words were hot enough to make her thighs tremble.
“Not around me?”
He sighed. “No.”
Montana had no idea what to say to that. Part of her wanted to invite him back to her place. If a guy felt that strongly, she thought she should at least say thank you. Although her mother would probably tell her that a card was plenty. Part of her wondered if this was just a game. Except Simon was proud, and she doubted he would be willing to humiliate himself just to score points.
He took the decision out of her hands. “I’ve taken up enough of your time,” he said. “Thank you for showing me the town. As for the kiss, it won’t happen again. You have my word.”
With that disappointing last statement, he turned and walked away.
SIMON FOUND REFUGE in his work at the hospital. As always, dealing with his patients, planning surgery, examining healing burns kept him occupied, both physically and mentally. But every now and then, and more often than he wanted, he remembered how he’d acted with Montana.
Now, sitting in the small office he’d been given for his three-month stay, he found himself thinking about the scent of her and the feel of her in his arms. He was distracted by the remembrance of her silky hair in his hands, the sound of her laughter and the way she looked when she smiled.
Heat and need threatened to overwhelm him. Dammit all to hell, he thought grimly. Why now? Why her?
There wouldn’t be an answer. Fate was nothing if not mysterious. He simply had to accept that when he was around Montana he was going to act like an idiot. If he didn’t watch himself, he would slide past idiot status and into something more dangerous.
Now, as he stared at the chart but saw her face instead, he knew he had to find a solution. Bad enough to be stupid, but worse to be pathetic. He’d made the mistake of telling her why he’d kissed her. No doubt she felt sorry for him and was eager to stay away from him.
Normally he didn’t care what people thought of him, but for some reason, Montana’s opinion mattered. He wanted to impress her. Between his reaction to Fluffy exploding onto the ward and the kiss, he couldn’t be further off the mark.
His cell phone rang.
Simon glanced at the screen before answering, then pushed the button. “What trouble are you in now?” he asked, smiling.
“The usual,” the caller said. “Be impressed. I have cell service in Nepal.”
“I am. How’s it going, Alistair?”