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“Yeah, but maybe you’ll get married and have some kids?”
Scoffing, he looked down at her as she looked up at him. “I’ll buy it tomorrow if you’ll move in with me.”
She eyed him and then looked away. “We are going on six hours, Jordie. You can’t get me back, have mind-blowing sex, punch my ex, fight with me, and then ask me to move in.”
“I think I asked before the punching of the ex happened,” he corrected her and she shot him a salty look.
“Don’t be so literal. Give us a little time before we jump into something like that.”
“Okay, answer me this—will we be sleeping alone from this point forward?”
Her eyes narrowed. “That’s not fair. I like sleeping with you.”
“Oh, I do too, which is why I won’t be sleeping without you unless I’m on the road. But at least this way, we can do it as loud as we want and anywhere we want.”
She shook her head. “Let me sleep on that,” she decided and he nodded.
“Fine, I don’t sign my contract till Friday.”
“I’ll have an answer by then,” she agreed.
“Good,” he said just as a text message came through, surprising him. It was late, who was texting him? The sound caught Kacey’s attention, her eyes moving to the screen as he clicked on his message.
Mom: Jordie, honey! I haven’t heard from you. Remember I am your mother and you have to call me every once in a while. But anyway, call me tomorrow when you wake up! I have great news.
His stomach twisted in anguish as he deleted the text, shutting off his phone. Silence stretched as Kacey’s fingers tapped against his chest.
“Have you talked to her lately?”
He shook his head, feeling her gaze on him. “No.”
“Does she know about you going to rehab?”
“Nope, I only told your family.”
“Ma and Dad knew?”
“Yeah, your mom even came and brought me cookies a time or two,” he said, hating that his own mother didn’t even think to do something like that or even ask if he was okay. She didn’t care about him. The only time she cared was when it was beneficial to her.
“Are you going to call her?”
“No,” he decided, tossing his phone on the nightstand. “Push play, let’s watch this stupid movie.”
But she didn’t move. Pushing the blankets off them, she climbed on top of him, and instantly his hands came to her ass. “Or we can do this.”
Cupping his face, she let her gaze bore into his. There wasn’t any lust in her eyes, only determination. “Are you okay?”
“No,” he admitted. “She fucks with my head.”
“I know and I’m sorry. Don’t call her, okay? Please?”
“I won’t.”
“Okay, and don’t let it bother you. You have my mom and dad and Karson.”
“And you,” he said, his hands sliding up her back, underneath her shirt, to bring her down to him. “And that’s all I need.”
“I know it hurts though. I know how much you want her love.”
He shrugged. “Can’t miss what you never had though.”
Her eyes turned sad as she dropped her forehead to hers. “I’m gonna make up for the love she doesn’t give you.”
“You already do, Kacey,” he whispered as her nose moved along his. “You love enough for the world.”
She gave him a faint smile before shaking her head. “I’m sorry she sucks.”
“Not everyone has perfect parents like you, Kacey. It’s not your fault, don’t worry about it,” he said, but as soon as he said it, he regretted it. It was something he would have said before, when he’d brush off the hurt his mother caused and pick up the bottle. Kacey knew that though; she knew him and his antics, and soon her eyes narrowed as she held his gaze.
“Don’t push me away.”
“I’m not trying to,” he said sternly. “I just don’t want to talk about someone who doesn’t even love me.”
“Talking about it might make the pain stop,” she suggested and he shook his head.
“It won’t. It just reminds me of the craptastic family life I have,” he said and her mouth turned down. “The fact that my mother doesn’t love me, I have no clue who my dad is, and hey, I have nine stepdads, but still no siblings to be just as fucked up as me.”
As she threaded her fingers into his hair, he closed his eyes, hating that he’d unloaded like that. She didn’t need to hear all that; it showed his weakness. He hated how much pain his mother brought to him with only one text. All his progress felt like nothing. She could honestly drive him to drinking all over again, but as soon as the thought came, Kacey pressed her lips to his. Just as quickly as he’d wanted a drink, he wanted her more. Rolling her over so that he was on top, he pulled away, looking down into her beautiful face.
Her eyes were on him, her chest rising and falling as her eyes searched his. “You’re not trying to have sex with me to replace your cravings are you?”
He could lie. It would be so easy, but he knew he couldn’t. “Yes.”
“Okay,” she said with a nod. “At least you know what you’re doing.”
“But it isn’t okay, is it?” he asked and she shrugged.
“I don’t know,” she admitted. “That’s something you need to ask your therapist. But for now, use me, Jordie, though also know I’m here to talk. That I’ll listen till you can’t talk anymore. I’ll always be here. For whatever you need.”