Queen of Song and Souls
Page 100
"Why didn't you tell me this before I touched the mirror?"
I had not believed it necessary, but you are much stronger than I Saw. He sounded slightly embarrassed and not quite as sure of himself as he had seemed at their meeting. And much brighter.
Ellysetta wasn't sure if he was telling the truth, but as she stopped fighting to free herself, the blinding whiteness around her began to dim. Not much, but once again she could make out the faint shadows of her truemate and her quintet standing nearby.
Her head drooped in relief. Her hands remained touching the cool, motionless surface of the pool, but she was afraid to look again, afraid of what else it would show. "You told us there was still hope, yet every future the mirror has shown me so far is evil. I saw Rain murdered—and I was the one wielding the blade."
Bayas, but you looked into the mirror with fear, and so the mirror reflected the thing you fear most. I looked with a different heart, and I saw other paths . . . several not so bleak. The Elfs voice softened with compassion. Hope remains, faint though it may be. Look again, child. But this time, let love, not fear, guide your Song.
If only it were so easy. "I don't think I know how to stop being afraid. It's been such a part of me my whole life."
There are some fears, young Ellysetta, that can never be conquered. Sometimes, all you can do is acknowledge your fear, then act in spite of it. Look again, Ellysetta, but fill your mind with hope.
Hope. The word made her want to weep. When had she ever truly known hope? Her nightmares, her seizures, the fears of demon possession: Evil had haunted her all her life, tainted every happiness with shadow. Most of the few people she'd allowed herself to love had died or been lost because of her: Selianne, Mama, Papa, and the twins. She loved Rain, but all she'd brought him was banishment from the Fading Lands and the threat of certain death.
Somewhere deep inside, some part of her knew their truemate bond would never be complete. Rain would die because of her. Whether battling the Eld or from bond madness, it made no difference. In the end, she would kill him as surely as she killed him in her nightmares. As surely as she had caused the death of Mama and Selianne.
"He'll die because of me," she wept.
He will most certainty die if you do nothing. But more than that, all the Light of this world will die as well. Is that what you want, Ellysetta?
"No, of course not!"
Then look in the mirror, child. The gods sent you to fight the Dark, Ellysetta Erimea. Do not fear what you were born to do.
If it were only her life at stake, she could not have made herself look in the mirror again to see what other horrors would be revealed. But hers was not the only life at risk.
She knew the face of evil. She'd seen it in her dreams, and too often, lately, it had worn her own features. It must be stopped. There was no other option. Because, as Rain had once told her, when evil came calling, you couldn't reason with it. You couldn't bargain with it or strike terms of peace. You couldn't hide behind a locked door and hope that it would go away. Evil had no mercy. Evil didn't value life. It nursed its children on blood and hate. It celebrated death and hailed murder in the name of its Dark God.
She could not fail. No matter the cost to herself. For reasons she would never understand, the gods had apparently chosen her, Ellysetta Baristani, to be the hinge on which the fate of the world turned. And if there was anything in Hawksheart's mirror that would help her defeat the Shadow threatening all she held dear, she needed to find it.
Ellysetta lifted her head and looked back into the mirror.
chapter. eighteen
My love, my mate, my shei’tani
My life in this cage of pain, my soul’s other half
I am not free to touch her, to protect her
Though we are one
My love, my child, my daughter
My gift to the world, my gift from the gods
I am not free to hold her, to know her
Though she is the one to save my people
To end my torment
The Torment of Lord Death,
by Shannisorran v'En Celay
"What's wrong?” Rain frowned at Ellysetta as she rose to her feet and stepped away from the blue phosphorescent glow of the mirror pool. "Have you changed your mind about trying to See your Song in the pool after all?"
She stopped in surprise, "But... I already did." She looked to Hawksheart, then back at Rain. "We've been at it for bells."
Rain's brows shot up to his hairline. "Nei, you knelt at the water's edge, touched the surface for no more than a moment or two, and stood up again." Behind him, her quintet nodded in agreement.
All eyes turned to Hawksheart.
The Elf spread his hands. "You both are correct. Your truemate and I did, in fact, journey long and far, through a thousand different variations of her Song, though to you, our travels would have passed in the blink of an eye."
"I don't understand."
"The mirror is Elvish magic. Like the Faering Mists, what happens within the mirror exists outside of time. The only difference is that with the mirror, the Seer's body remains in this world and only the Seer's soul takes the journey."
Rain bristled instantly. "You said nothing about Ellysetta's soul leaving her body when she touched the mirror." He knew that was what happened when she entered the Well of Souls to save a life. But he also knew she needed to anchor herself before attempting such a thing, and she had not anchored herself before touching the mirror.
"She was in no danger. I was with her."
I had not believed it necessary, but you are much stronger than I Saw. He sounded slightly embarrassed and not quite as sure of himself as he had seemed at their meeting. And much brighter.
Ellysetta wasn't sure if he was telling the truth, but as she stopped fighting to free herself, the blinding whiteness around her began to dim. Not much, but once again she could make out the faint shadows of her truemate and her quintet standing nearby.
Her head drooped in relief. Her hands remained touching the cool, motionless surface of the pool, but she was afraid to look again, afraid of what else it would show. "You told us there was still hope, yet every future the mirror has shown me so far is evil. I saw Rain murdered—and I was the one wielding the blade."
Bayas, but you looked into the mirror with fear, and so the mirror reflected the thing you fear most. I looked with a different heart, and I saw other paths . . . several not so bleak. The Elfs voice softened with compassion. Hope remains, faint though it may be. Look again, child. But this time, let love, not fear, guide your Song.
If only it were so easy. "I don't think I know how to stop being afraid. It's been such a part of me my whole life."
There are some fears, young Ellysetta, that can never be conquered. Sometimes, all you can do is acknowledge your fear, then act in spite of it. Look again, Ellysetta, but fill your mind with hope.
Hope. The word made her want to weep. When had she ever truly known hope? Her nightmares, her seizures, the fears of demon possession: Evil had haunted her all her life, tainted every happiness with shadow. Most of the few people she'd allowed herself to love had died or been lost because of her: Selianne, Mama, Papa, and the twins. She loved Rain, but all she'd brought him was banishment from the Fading Lands and the threat of certain death.
Somewhere deep inside, some part of her knew their truemate bond would never be complete. Rain would die because of her. Whether battling the Eld or from bond madness, it made no difference. In the end, she would kill him as surely as she killed him in her nightmares. As surely as she had caused the death of Mama and Selianne.
"He'll die because of me," she wept.
He will most certainty die if you do nothing. But more than that, all the Light of this world will die as well. Is that what you want, Ellysetta?
"No, of course not!"
Then look in the mirror, child. The gods sent you to fight the Dark, Ellysetta Erimea. Do not fear what you were born to do.
If it were only her life at stake, she could not have made herself look in the mirror again to see what other horrors would be revealed. But hers was not the only life at risk.
She knew the face of evil. She'd seen it in her dreams, and too often, lately, it had worn her own features. It must be stopped. There was no other option. Because, as Rain had once told her, when evil came calling, you couldn't reason with it. You couldn't bargain with it or strike terms of peace. You couldn't hide behind a locked door and hope that it would go away. Evil had no mercy. Evil didn't value life. It nursed its children on blood and hate. It celebrated death and hailed murder in the name of its Dark God.
She could not fail. No matter the cost to herself. For reasons she would never understand, the gods had apparently chosen her, Ellysetta Baristani, to be the hinge on which the fate of the world turned. And if there was anything in Hawksheart's mirror that would help her defeat the Shadow threatening all she held dear, she needed to find it.
Ellysetta lifted her head and looked back into the mirror.
chapter. eighteen
My love, my mate, my shei’tani
My life in this cage of pain, my soul’s other half
I am not free to touch her, to protect her
Though we are one
My love, my child, my daughter
My gift to the world, my gift from the gods
I am not free to hold her, to know her
Though she is the one to save my people
To end my torment
The Torment of Lord Death,
by Shannisorran v'En Celay
"What's wrong?” Rain frowned at Ellysetta as she rose to her feet and stepped away from the blue phosphorescent glow of the mirror pool. "Have you changed your mind about trying to See your Song in the pool after all?"
She stopped in surprise, "But... I already did." She looked to Hawksheart, then back at Rain. "We've been at it for bells."
Rain's brows shot up to his hairline. "Nei, you knelt at the water's edge, touched the surface for no more than a moment or two, and stood up again." Behind him, her quintet nodded in agreement.
All eyes turned to Hawksheart.
The Elf spread his hands. "You both are correct. Your truemate and I did, in fact, journey long and far, through a thousand different variations of her Song, though to you, our travels would have passed in the blink of an eye."
"I don't understand."
"The mirror is Elvish magic. Like the Faering Mists, what happens within the mirror exists outside of time. The only difference is that with the mirror, the Seer's body remains in this world and only the Seer's soul takes the journey."
Rain bristled instantly. "You said nothing about Ellysetta's soul leaving her body when she touched the mirror." He knew that was what happened when she entered the Well of Souls to save a life. But he also knew she needed to anchor herself before attempting such a thing, and she had not anchored herself before touching the mirror.
"She was in no danger. I was with her."
