Rapture
Page 52
Cushs eyes narrowed. Hold up, is this really about you not wanting to force yourself on me or is this about the fact that you dont want to be with me? You just said its not fair for you. Do you feel like Im forcing this on you? She could see the hurt in his eyes and she should correct him. She should tell him the truth, but she saw this as her chance to push him away, a chance to make sure that he didnt get stuck with her.
Look, I realize that you are the other half to my soul. I understand that without you I wont ever be whole. But, Cush, thats just not enough for me to give up my life and it shouldnt be enough for you either. She turned away from him and had to bite her tongue to keep from crying because she knew at any moment he was going to tell her she was right. Any moment he was going to tell her to have a nice life and it was going to break her heart. She didnt want him to see her if and when he finally did it.
Youre right, he said after several heartbeats.
Elora felt her heart begin to shatter into a million tiny pieces. She squeezed her hands into fists and welcomed the pain of her fingernails digging into her palms. He had said it; he agreed with her. Now she just had to be strong enough to let him walk away.
If all there was between us was the soul mate connection, it wouldnt be enough, he continued and she was barely listening because really all she wanted was for him to leave so she could curl up in a ball and cry like the girl she never claimed to be. If the only thing that made us what we are to each other was the Chosen bond then I wouldnt ask you to walk away from your life, but thats not all there is and you know it. LOOK AT ME! he yelled suddenly and Elora jumped.
She turned slowly and her eyes landed on a very angry light-elf warrior. His eyes nearly glowed and his chest rose and fell quickly with his short breaths.
Tell me. Look me in the eyes, Elora, and tell me that you dont love me.
What? she nearly shrieked at him.
He took a step closer and another and another until he was less than a foot away from her. She had to tilt her head back to look up at his face and see his incredible beauty so close to her, only a breath away.
Tell me, he whispered, that you dont love me. Tell me that the only thing between us is the link because you are my Chosen.
The words were on the tip of her tongue. She could lie; she reasoned with herself. It would be for his own good, after all, and it would be only a little lie. She nearly laughed out loud at that though because truthfully it would be the mother of all lies. She loved Cush. She loved everything that made him who he was right down to the stubborn tilt of his chin and the possessive flare that flipped his bitch switch.
And if youre going to lieto me, please at least try to make it convincing, he spoke up just as she took a breath to speak.
She snapped her lips shut and glared at him. He shrugged his huge shoulders and then folded his arms across his broad chest, waiting.
Elora wanted to stomp her feet and have a two year old moment, but she imagined herself having to tell Cassie all about it and decided that she wouldnt give her best friend the pleasure of such a story. Instead she took a deep breath and considered her options. She could lie and try to be convincing, or she could tell him the truth and hope that he didnt laugh at her. She cocked her head to the side and looked around his hulking frame to the door behind him. Or I could make a run for it, she thought. I could totally survive in Mexico on a beach somewhere. They make black bathing suits after all. Cush stepped to the side, effectively blocking her view of the door. Truth be told she couldnt outrun him; hed tackle her and then his amazing body would be on top of hers and one thing would lead to another. Her pulse picked up and she nearly grinned as she thought, okay, so running had its possibilities.
Little Raven, Cushs deep voice brought her back to the present, are you going to answer me?
I dont, she started and almost took a step back when his eyes narrowed dangerously. She cleared her throat. I dont have to lie.
Youre saying you dont love me? he asked incredulously.
No, Im saying that how I feel about you has never been in question. I said it shouldnt be enough for you to just stay with me because Im your Chosen, she reminded him.
His lips quirked up in that infuriating half smile as he spoke. So you do love me?
Dammit, Cush, Elora finally growled in frustration. I havent really said anything, you big ox. Other than, I didnt think we should be together just because we were predestined. What are you saying? What do you want? The last part came out much whinier than she wanted.
I told you that I wanted you. His arms uncrossed and he reached for her, cupping her face in his large hands. You are mine. Your soul belongs to me and mine belongs to you. You,
Thats not,
Hush, he told her when she interrupted. I wasnt finished. You have captivated me with your fierce loyalty and incredible bravery. You dazzle me with your beauty and you humble me with your trust and Iloveyou.
Elora swore that if his hands had not been on her face and his body so close to hers she would have fainted. He had said it.
What? she breathed. So maybe she wanted to hear it again; sue her.
Look, I realize that you are the other half to my soul. I understand that without you I wont ever be whole. But, Cush, thats just not enough for me to give up my life and it shouldnt be enough for you either. She turned away from him and had to bite her tongue to keep from crying because she knew at any moment he was going to tell her she was right. Any moment he was going to tell her to have a nice life and it was going to break her heart. She didnt want him to see her if and when he finally did it.
Youre right, he said after several heartbeats.
Elora felt her heart begin to shatter into a million tiny pieces. She squeezed her hands into fists and welcomed the pain of her fingernails digging into her palms. He had said it; he agreed with her. Now she just had to be strong enough to let him walk away.
If all there was between us was the soul mate connection, it wouldnt be enough, he continued and she was barely listening because really all she wanted was for him to leave so she could curl up in a ball and cry like the girl she never claimed to be. If the only thing that made us what we are to each other was the Chosen bond then I wouldnt ask you to walk away from your life, but thats not all there is and you know it. LOOK AT ME! he yelled suddenly and Elora jumped.
She turned slowly and her eyes landed on a very angry light-elf warrior. His eyes nearly glowed and his chest rose and fell quickly with his short breaths.
Tell me. Look me in the eyes, Elora, and tell me that you dont love me.
What? she nearly shrieked at him.
He took a step closer and another and another until he was less than a foot away from her. She had to tilt her head back to look up at his face and see his incredible beauty so close to her, only a breath away.
Tell me, he whispered, that you dont love me. Tell me that the only thing between us is the link because you are my Chosen.
The words were on the tip of her tongue. She could lie; she reasoned with herself. It would be for his own good, after all, and it would be only a little lie. She nearly laughed out loud at that though because truthfully it would be the mother of all lies. She loved Cush. She loved everything that made him who he was right down to the stubborn tilt of his chin and the possessive flare that flipped his bitch switch.
And if youre going to lieto me, please at least try to make it convincing, he spoke up just as she took a breath to speak.
She snapped her lips shut and glared at him. He shrugged his huge shoulders and then folded his arms across his broad chest, waiting.
Elora wanted to stomp her feet and have a two year old moment, but she imagined herself having to tell Cassie all about it and decided that she wouldnt give her best friend the pleasure of such a story. Instead she took a deep breath and considered her options. She could lie and try to be convincing, or she could tell him the truth and hope that he didnt laugh at her. She cocked her head to the side and looked around his hulking frame to the door behind him. Or I could make a run for it, she thought. I could totally survive in Mexico on a beach somewhere. They make black bathing suits after all. Cush stepped to the side, effectively blocking her view of the door. Truth be told she couldnt outrun him; hed tackle her and then his amazing body would be on top of hers and one thing would lead to another. Her pulse picked up and she nearly grinned as she thought, okay, so running had its possibilities.
Little Raven, Cushs deep voice brought her back to the present, are you going to answer me?
I dont, she started and almost took a step back when his eyes narrowed dangerously. She cleared her throat. I dont have to lie.
Youre saying you dont love me? he asked incredulously.
No, Im saying that how I feel about you has never been in question. I said it shouldnt be enough for you to just stay with me because Im your Chosen, she reminded him.
His lips quirked up in that infuriating half smile as he spoke. So you do love me?
Dammit, Cush, Elora finally growled in frustration. I havent really said anything, you big ox. Other than, I didnt think we should be together just because we were predestined. What are you saying? What do you want? The last part came out much whinier than she wanted.
I told you that I wanted you. His arms uncrossed and he reached for her, cupping her face in his large hands. You are mine. Your soul belongs to me and mine belongs to you. You,
Thats not,
Hush, he told her when she interrupted. I wasnt finished. You have captivated me with your fierce loyalty and incredible bravery. You dazzle me with your beauty and you humble me with your trust and Iloveyou.
Elora swore that if his hands had not been on her face and his body so close to hers she would have fainted. He had said it.
What? she breathed. So maybe she wanted to hear it again; sue her.
