Revealed: The Missing Years
Page 23
Really? In love with Anthony Rawlings?
Emily did her best to dissuade Claire and convince her to stay in California, reminding her of the things Anthony had done in the past. Truly, with their history, John and Emily were amazed that Rawlings had permitted Claire to travel to their home. It seemed like the perfect opportunity to persuade her to escape.
Claire assured them that it wasn’t like it had been before—that this time was different. John remembered a conversation:
“Claire, look at you. You’re starting to show,” Emily said as she feigned excitement for her sister.
Claire’s hand fluttered over her midsection. “I know. It’s amazing. I’m starting to feel our baby move.” With each word, she glowed—not only her green eyes, which reminded John of his wife’s, but also her entire expression.
That glow faded as Emily retorted, “Really? Must you use the word our? You know this is 2013. There’s nothing wrong with raising this baby on your own. You made a mistake. It’s all right. Get away while you can. I mean, fine, if you want to take his money or child support or whatever, do it. But why, oh why, would you want to subject yourself and your child to a man like him?”
“I’m not having this conversation with you,” Claire replied matter-of-factly.
“Why?” Emily asked, “Because he’ll find out? That Clay-guy will tell him, won’t he?”
John didn’t try to hide his feelings regarding Anthony Rawlings. In his eyes, the man had ruined his career and sent him to prison. If it weren’t for Amber McCoy and SiJo, the life he and Emily lived wouldn’t be possible. Thankfully, the New York Bar Association had found new evidence and revisited the case. His license was in the process of reinstatement. Despite all of that, John was a litigator and as such tried to see both sides of the story, no matter how difficult. Therefore, when Claire stood and walked to the window of their Palo Alto home, John touched his wife’s hand, shook his head, and whispered, “Do you want to push her away?”
Knowing how much Claire meant to his wife and how much she had looked forward to her visit, Emily’s teary stare burned a hole in his heart. “Claire,” John said, “you know we love you. We always have. You have to understand where we’re coming from. He ruined your life. He ruined our lives. We’re just now making a recovery.”
Expecting to see sadness, Claire turned with a vengeance. “I’m not going to subject our child to this negativity regarding his or her father. Honestly John…and Emily,” she added, “I’m looking out on a pristine tree-lined street in one of the most affluent areas of the country. Emily, you say you’re taking a break from teaching. Why? I’ll tell you why. It’s because you can afford to do it. For the first time, you can afford it. You say Tony ruined your lives. I’m not saying he didn’t do things that are regrettable. I’m not downplaying the hell you or I went through. I’m saying we came out the other side and you know what? You don’t look too worse for wear. And I’m tired of hearing about Clay’s presence. Do you know why he’s here? Because both Tony and I knew that Tony wouldn’t be welcome. Clay isn’t spying on me: he’s protecting me. Did you all forget about Patrick Chester? My laptop still hasn’t been found. And, yes, Tony has money. That makes me a target for crazy people. I’d rather have Clay nearby than live in fear.”
“But if you weren’t with him, you wouldn’t be a target,” Emily tried.
“Our child would be. No matter what you say, or what you want me to do, this is my life, and I choose to live it with Anthony Rawlings. We’ve taken a long and unconventional road to get to where we are. But let me tell you: where we are is a good place. I want to have the two of you in our lives and the life of our child. That choice is yours. My child will not pay the price for the sins of his father, from you or from anyone else.”
Emily stood shell-shocked. “I’d h-hoped…” her words trailed away.
“What, Emily? You’d hoped I would come to California and decide to stay?”
Emily shook her head and then shrugged her shoulders. “I’d hoped that when John decided to take the job at SiJo we’d be together again, the three of us. Like it used to be.”
Though Emily’s cheeks were damp, Claire had yet to shed a tear as she spoke each word with conviction, “I’m not the little sister who needs you to tell me what to do. I’ll admit that I’ve lived through hell, but so has Tony. You don’t know the half of it, and frankly, it’s none of your business. But we’ve come out stronger. I’m stronger, and I want our child to have both parents. It’s more than that: even without our child, I want to marry Tony again.”
“It seemed like you and Harr—”
“Stop,” John interrupted. “Claire’s made her point. She didn’t come here to escape. She came to tell us about her engagement. We don’t have to like it, but I don’t believe Claire came to Palo Alto for our permission.”
Emily exhaled. “How can you take her side? We’ve discussed this. Think of everythin—”
John cupped his wife’s cheeks. “I’m not taking her side. I’ve always been on your side and I always will be. Don’t you see? So will Claire. She’ll always choose Anthony, just like I’ll always choose you. Isn’t that how it’s supposed to be? We can also be on Claire’s side and the side of our niece or nephew.” He turned to Claire. “That’s the best I can offer you right now. I admit that I have a lot of resentment. I’m not as ready to forgive as you. Maybe that makes you a better person. I’ve always thought you were pretty special.”
Emily did her best to dissuade Claire and convince her to stay in California, reminding her of the things Anthony had done in the past. Truly, with their history, John and Emily were amazed that Rawlings had permitted Claire to travel to their home. It seemed like the perfect opportunity to persuade her to escape.
Claire assured them that it wasn’t like it had been before—that this time was different. John remembered a conversation:
“Claire, look at you. You’re starting to show,” Emily said as she feigned excitement for her sister.
Claire’s hand fluttered over her midsection. “I know. It’s amazing. I’m starting to feel our baby move.” With each word, she glowed—not only her green eyes, which reminded John of his wife’s, but also her entire expression.
That glow faded as Emily retorted, “Really? Must you use the word our? You know this is 2013. There’s nothing wrong with raising this baby on your own. You made a mistake. It’s all right. Get away while you can. I mean, fine, if you want to take his money or child support or whatever, do it. But why, oh why, would you want to subject yourself and your child to a man like him?”
“I’m not having this conversation with you,” Claire replied matter-of-factly.
“Why?” Emily asked, “Because he’ll find out? That Clay-guy will tell him, won’t he?”
John didn’t try to hide his feelings regarding Anthony Rawlings. In his eyes, the man had ruined his career and sent him to prison. If it weren’t for Amber McCoy and SiJo, the life he and Emily lived wouldn’t be possible. Thankfully, the New York Bar Association had found new evidence and revisited the case. His license was in the process of reinstatement. Despite all of that, John was a litigator and as such tried to see both sides of the story, no matter how difficult. Therefore, when Claire stood and walked to the window of their Palo Alto home, John touched his wife’s hand, shook his head, and whispered, “Do you want to push her away?”
Knowing how much Claire meant to his wife and how much she had looked forward to her visit, Emily’s teary stare burned a hole in his heart. “Claire,” John said, “you know we love you. We always have. You have to understand where we’re coming from. He ruined your life. He ruined our lives. We’re just now making a recovery.”
Expecting to see sadness, Claire turned with a vengeance. “I’m not going to subject our child to this negativity regarding his or her father. Honestly John…and Emily,” she added, “I’m looking out on a pristine tree-lined street in one of the most affluent areas of the country. Emily, you say you’re taking a break from teaching. Why? I’ll tell you why. It’s because you can afford to do it. For the first time, you can afford it. You say Tony ruined your lives. I’m not saying he didn’t do things that are regrettable. I’m not downplaying the hell you or I went through. I’m saying we came out the other side and you know what? You don’t look too worse for wear. And I’m tired of hearing about Clay’s presence. Do you know why he’s here? Because both Tony and I knew that Tony wouldn’t be welcome. Clay isn’t spying on me: he’s protecting me. Did you all forget about Patrick Chester? My laptop still hasn’t been found. And, yes, Tony has money. That makes me a target for crazy people. I’d rather have Clay nearby than live in fear.”
“But if you weren’t with him, you wouldn’t be a target,” Emily tried.
“Our child would be. No matter what you say, or what you want me to do, this is my life, and I choose to live it with Anthony Rawlings. We’ve taken a long and unconventional road to get to where we are. But let me tell you: where we are is a good place. I want to have the two of you in our lives and the life of our child. That choice is yours. My child will not pay the price for the sins of his father, from you or from anyone else.”
Emily stood shell-shocked. “I’d h-hoped…” her words trailed away.
“What, Emily? You’d hoped I would come to California and decide to stay?”
Emily shook her head and then shrugged her shoulders. “I’d hoped that when John decided to take the job at SiJo we’d be together again, the three of us. Like it used to be.”
Though Emily’s cheeks were damp, Claire had yet to shed a tear as she spoke each word with conviction, “I’m not the little sister who needs you to tell me what to do. I’ll admit that I’ve lived through hell, but so has Tony. You don’t know the half of it, and frankly, it’s none of your business. But we’ve come out stronger. I’m stronger, and I want our child to have both parents. It’s more than that: even without our child, I want to marry Tony again.”
“It seemed like you and Harr—”
“Stop,” John interrupted. “Claire’s made her point. She didn’t come here to escape. She came to tell us about her engagement. We don’t have to like it, but I don’t believe Claire came to Palo Alto for our permission.”
Emily exhaled. “How can you take her side? We’ve discussed this. Think of everythin—”
John cupped his wife’s cheeks. “I’m not taking her side. I’ve always been on your side and I always will be. Don’t you see? So will Claire. She’ll always choose Anthony, just like I’ll always choose you. Isn’t that how it’s supposed to be? We can also be on Claire’s side and the side of our niece or nephew.” He turned to Claire. “That’s the best I can offer you right now. I admit that I have a lot of resentment. I’m not as ready to forgive as you. Maybe that makes you a better person. I’ve always thought you were pretty special.”
