Rock Chick Regret
Page 53
Then he leaned forward and down, grabbed my ankle, lifted my foot between his legs, slid off my shoe and threw it to the side. His head came up, eyes on mine as one hand held my ankle firmly, his other hand trailed up the back of my calf, moving only to his fingertips as they swept behind my knee then kept going partially up the back of my thigh before his touch fell away.
Oh… my.
He put my foot down and repeated this move with my other leg.
Before I could do a thing (like, say, tear off my clothes and throw myself at him), he stood in front of me so close our bodies brushed, the tingles had started to spread again, this time far more frantic and he pulled off his t-shirt. At our proximity, this maneuver meant his t-shirt caught under my br**sts and slid over them. I sucked in breath and reached out quickly to grab his waist and hold on because I was pretty certain sure my legs were about to give out.
He tossed his t-shirt toward my shoes and my hands tensed at his waist when I saw his chest. It was smooth, well-defined and he had a small, broken heart inked in blood red, outlined in barbed-wire black, tattooed on his inside, left pectoral.
Like someone else (an even newer New Sadie) had taken over my body, I leaned forward and put my mouth to his incredibly cool tattoo. Then I put my tongue there too.
I liked the taste of his skin. I liked it so much I slid my tongue to his nipple and that was that.
His hands came to my shirt, he whipped it over my head, dislodging my mouth from his chest and he tossed that aside. His arms locked around me, my head went back, his head bent and he kissed me.
This kiss, I could feel right away, was not under his control. It was even hotter, deeper and so urgent, I felt it stirring in me. My body responding wildly, I shoved my hands under his arms and wrapped them around him as tight as I could.
Still kissing me, his hands slid down my bottom, pressing me deeper into him so I could feel his hardness against my belly and at the feel of it, a thrill raced through my entire system.
When his hands moved back up, his fingers found the skirt’s zipper and tugged it down then he shoved my skirt over my h*ps until it fell to my feet.
His arms went around me then, he fell back to the bed, me on top of him, he rolled me to the side so I was on my back, his mouth on me everywhere, my neck, behind my ears, down my throat, across my chest. It felt good, it felt tremendous. I thought there was nothing better in the whole world until his lips closed over the dove-gray satin of my bra right where my nipple was.
I felt his tongue through the satin then he sucked deep.
Waves of pure goodness shot from my nipple to between my legs and my hands slid in his hair.
“Oh my God,” I breathed. “Do that again.”
He did as I asked, it felt even better than before and I arched into him, wanting more. His hand slid down my belly, into my panties, between my legs, I felt his fingers on me, sliding through the wetness…
And I froze.
Unbidden, unwanted ice water filled my veins. I clamped my legs shut and my fingers fisted in his hair.
The desire knotting in my belly vanished, it was panic in my belly now, sheer and mad, and my only crazed thought was escape.
His hand froze, his body stilled and his head came up but I didn’t look at him.
I let him go, rolled, dislodging him and his hand and put a knee to the bed to launch myself away. I got about a foot before he tagged me and dragged me backward into the heat of his body.
“Let go!” I screamed in a voice so shrill, so full of terror, it hurt my own ears.
“Sadie, calm down,” he whispered into the back of my neck as his arms wrapped tight around me, one at my stomach, one at my chest, pulling me into his hard body. “You’re safe. We’ll stop.”
“I have to go,” I demanded.
I felt his gentle, “Sh,” at my neck and I saw his hand reach out, nab a blanket at the end of the bed and pull it over my body.
I was trembling head-to-foot regardless of his heat and the blanket. Trembling so violently I could swear I felt the bed shaking with it.
The humiliation was excruciating, crippling and I felt tears clog my throat.
“I have to go,” I repeated, my voice sounding funny.
“Quiet, mi corazón,” he said gently.
I stayed quiet but I went on trembling, staring unseeing across his bed to his wall. He went on holding me tightly, his face in my hair, his warm breath on my neck. After long moments, his heat penetrated the cold in my veins and the tremors stopped.
It was then I realized I did it to him again. I came onto him and took him somewhere I didn’t intend to go. I didn’t know I didn’t intend to go there but that was the way it ended all the same.
“I’m sorry,” I whispered.
He gave me a squeeze. “Why?” he asked.
“I did it to you again,” I told him honestly. It cost me but he deserved honesty and not the cold bitch I treated him to the last time I walked away from him.
He rolled me to face him, arranged the blanket so it was covering me again and slid his hand through the side of my hair, pulling it away from my face. His hand went down my back until his arm was locked around me again.
I looked into his eyes. They were warm and gentle not hard and angry.
Well, thank God for that.
Finally, he said, “Don’t worry about it.”
“I didn’t intend –”
“I know you didn’t.”
“I feel like an idiot.”
“Don’t,” he said firmly.
I pulled in my lips, nodded (even though I still felt like an idiot, I mean, this was embarrassing) then dropped my gaze to his throat.
“Put your arms around me, mamita,” he ordered.
I didn’t want to but I did and, for some reason, this made me feel better.
“Can I ask a favor?”
I nodded again.
“Stay here tonight.”
My body went tight.
“No, Sadie.” His fingers came to my chin and lifted my face to look at him. When my eyes were on his he leaned in and touched his mouth to mine. He pulled away a couple of inches and said, “I just want you beside me. That’s it.”
“Buddy and Ralphie –” I began, using my one and only easy (but good) excuse.
“I’ll call Buddy and Ralphie.”
Darn.
If Hector called Ralphie and Buddy and Ralphie answered he’d probably leap for joy. I figured Buddy’s reaction would be far less dramatic but along the same vein.
I chewed my lip. Oh heck, what could I say?
First off, I’d already slept with him twice. It was on a couch but still. Secondly, I could hardly say no after this latest episode. Lastly, I wanted to stay with him, he made me feel snug, warm and safe.
Oh… my.
He put my foot down and repeated this move with my other leg.
Before I could do a thing (like, say, tear off my clothes and throw myself at him), he stood in front of me so close our bodies brushed, the tingles had started to spread again, this time far more frantic and he pulled off his t-shirt. At our proximity, this maneuver meant his t-shirt caught under my br**sts and slid over them. I sucked in breath and reached out quickly to grab his waist and hold on because I was pretty certain sure my legs were about to give out.
He tossed his t-shirt toward my shoes and my hands tensed at his waist when I saw his chest. It was smooth, well-defined and he had a small, broken heart inked in blood red, outlined in barbed-wire black, tattooed on his inside, left pectoral.
Like someone else (an even newer New Sadie) had taken over my body, I leaned forward and put my mouth to his incredibly cool tattoo. Then I put my tongue there too.
I liked the taste of his skin. I liked it so much I slid my tongue to his nipple and that was that.
His hands came to my shirt, he whipped it over my head, dislodging my mouth from his chest and he tossed that aside. His arms locked around me, my head went back, his head bent and he kissed me.
This kiss, I could feel right away, was not under his control. It was even hotter, deeper and so urgent, I felt it stirring in me. My body responding wildly, I shoved my hands under his arms and wrapped them around him as tight as I could.
Still kissing me, his hands slid down my bottom, pressing me deeper into him so I could feel his hardness against my belly and at the feel of it, a thrill raced through my entire system.
When his hands moved back up, his fingers found the skirt’s zipper and tugged it down then he shoved my skirt over my h*ps until it fell to my feet.
His arms went around me then, he fell back to the bed, me on top of him, he rolled me to the side so I was on my back, his mouth on me everywhere, my neck, behind my ears, down my throat, across my chest. It felt good, it felt tremendous. I thought there was nothing better in the whole world until his lips closed over the dove-gray satin of my bra right where my nipple was.
I felt his tongue through the satin then he sucked deep.
Waves of pure goodness shot from my nipple to between my legs and my hands slid in his hair.
“Oh my God,” I breathed. “Do that again.”
He did as I asked, it felt even better than before and I arched into him, wanting more. His hand slid down my belly, into my panties, between my legs, I felt his fingers on me, sliding through the wetness…
And I froze.
Unbidden, unwanted ice water filled my veins. I clamped my legs shut and my fingers fisted in his hair.
The desire knotting in my belly vanished, it was panic in my belly now, sheer and mad, and my only crazed thought was escape.
His hand froze, his body stilled and his head came up but I didn’t look at him.
I let him go, rolled, dislodging him and his hand and put a knee to the bed to launch myself away. I got about a foot before he tagged me and dragged me backward into the heat of his body.
“Let go!” I screamed in a voice so shrill, so full of terror, it hurt my own ears.
“Sadie, calm down,” he whispered into the back of my neck as his arms wrapped tight around me, one at my stomach, one at my chest, pulling me into his hard body. “You’re safe. We’ll stop.”
“I have to go,” I demanded.
I felt his gentle, “Sh,” at my neck and I saw his hand reach out, nab a blanket at the end of the bed and pull it over my body.
I was trembling head-to-foot regardless of his heat and the blanket. Trembling so violently I could swear I felt the bed shaking with it.
The humiliation was excruciating, crippling and I felt tears clog my throat.
“I have to go,” I repeated, my voice sounding funny.
“Quiet, mi corazón,” he said gently.
I stayed quiet but I went on trembling, staring unseeing across his bed to his wall. He went on holding me tightly, his face in my hair, his warm breath on my neck. After long moments, his heat penetrated the cold in my veins and the tremors stopped.
It was then I realized I did it to him again. I came onto him and took him somewhere I didn’t intend to go. I didn’t know I didn’t intend to go there but that was the way it ended all the same.
“I’m sorry,” I whispered.
He gave me a squeeze. “Why?” he asked.
“I did it to you again,” I told him honestly. It cost me but he deserved honesty and not the cold bitch I treated him to the last time I walked away from him.
He rolled me to face him, arranged the blanket so it was covering me again and slid his hand through the side of my hair, pulling it away from my face. His hand went down my back until his arm was locked around me again.
I looked into his eyes. They were warm and gentle not hard and angry.
Well, thank God for that.
Finally, he said, “Don’t worry about it.”
“I didn’t intend –”
“I know you didn’t.”
“I feel like an idiot.”
“Don’t,” he said firmly.
I pulled in my lips, nodded (even though I still felt like an idiot, I mean, this was embarrassing) then dropped my gaze to his throat.
“Put your arms around me, mamita,” he ordered.
I didn’t want to but I did and, for some reason, this made me feel better.
“Can I ask a favor?”
I nodded again.
“Stay here tonight.”
My body went tight.
“No, Sadie.” His fingers came to my chin and lifted my face to look at him. When my eyes were on his he leaned in and touched his mouth to mine. He pulled away a couple of inches and said, “I just want you beside me. That’s it.”
“Buddy and Ralphie –” I began, using my one and only easy (but good) excuse.
“I’ll call Buddy and Ralphie.”
Darn.
If Hector called Ralphie and Buddy and Ralphie answered he’d probably leap for joy. I figured Buddy’s reaction would be far less dramatic but along the same vein.
I chewed my lip. Oh heck, what could I say?
First off, I’d already slept with him twice. It was on a couch but still. Secondly, I could hardly say no after this latest episode. Lastly, I wanted to stay with him, he made me feel snug, warm and safe.
