Second Chance Girl
Page 61
“This dinner isn’t about you. It’s about Del and Maya.”
She was right, but that didn’t make walking away from her any easier.
At three minutes to six, Mathias drove the short distance to his house. For reasons not clear to him, the family had decided to eat in. Maya and Elaine were going to cook and then they would all gather around the large table in his dining room. He walked in to find Nick and Ceallach standing toe to toe in the living room.
“You could have been great,” Ceallach yelled. “Instead you work with wood. It’s ridiculous. Do you know I found out you help out at that wedding place? What’s wrong with you?”
Mathias stood in the doorway. It would be so easy to back out, to pretend he’d forgotten about the meal. Then he remembered what Carol had told him—this was about Del and Maya. He had to do his best to keep the peace.
“Hey, Dad,” he called.
His father glanced at him, then turned back to Nick. “Even your brother still works with glass.”
Nick’s expression hardened. “Even, Dad? You always have to put down Mathias. You think we’re fooled, but we’re not. We all know who’s better and it’s not you.”
Ceallach’s face reddened. “He makes dishes.”
“Because of what you did. You couldn’t stand he’s more talented so you destroyed his work. You’re a hell of a father.”
Mathias moved to Nick’s side. “It’s okay,” he said quietly. “I’m done fighting that battle.”
Ceallach turned on him. “You never tried. You never took me on. You’re nowhere near as good as me, but you could have been something. Instead you gave up.”
Mathias glared at him. “You’re saying that it was a test? You did what you did as some perverse test of my character?”
Ronan walked into the living room. “Elaine said to stop yelling.”
“Yeah, that’s gonna work,” Nick muttered. He looked at Mathias. “He’s just saying that. You know he’s still messing with you.”
Mathias did know. He might not fully understand his father or the damage he’d done, but he could grasp the broad strokes of what had happened. He would have sworn that after all this time, he would be better at handling it, but his father still had the ability to get to him.
“You three have disappointed me,” Ceallach said. “I expected more of my sons.”
“Not nearly as much as we expected of you,” Nick shot back.
“You have two other sons,” Mathias added. “They’re good men with great characters. You know what, Dad, I think the reason you don’t want to deal with them is that you know you had nothing to do with who they are. At the end of the day, you’re still an asshole and they’re still good guys and you can’t stand that.”
His father started for him. “You dare to speak to me that way?”
Mathias had never been one to fight, but right now he was more than willing to take on his father. “I dare a whole lot more than that.”
Ceallach raised his fist. Nick got between them. Mathias had no idea where this was going but before he could find out, Ronan grabbed his arm and dragged him back.
“There’s no win in this,” his brother told him. “Not for you.”
Because Mathias had never been the fighter in the family. That job was Nick’s. Maybe it was time for things to change.
“We all need this to end,” he growled.
“Maybe, but not this way. The only person you’re going to hurt is yourself.”
Elaine walked into the living room, her eyes filled with tears. “Stop it!” she demanded. “Stop fighting. This is supposed to be a happy dinner. Del and Maya are getting married tomorrow. You have to stop fighting all the time. We’re a family. We should be nice to each other.”
“Kids learn from their fathers,” Nick said as he glared at his father. “Tell him to quit ignoring his two oldest sons and quit browbeating the rest of us.”
“Stop being a girl,” Ceallach said disdainfully.
Nick lunged for him. Both Ronan and Mathias pulled him back. Aidan and Del appeared and got in front of their father.
“I won’t have this,” Elaine shouted. “Stop it. Do you hear me? Stop it!”
“She’s right,” Mathias told Nick. “There’s no point. You’ll never win. You won’t break even. Worse, she’ll side with him and you’ll be the bad guy. Don’t bother. That’s the advantage of growing up, bro. We don’t have to care about him anymore.”
Their mother hurried forward. “Don’t say that,” she told Mathias. “He’s your father. He can’t help who he is.”
“You believe that, Mom?” he asked. “Do you actually believe the mighty Ceallach Mitchell can’t change his behavior?”
She looked from her husband to her son. “I just want us all to get along.”
Mathias felt the flood of emotions. He took a couple of deep breaths, then let the feelings wash over him. Regret, he supposed. That was the biggest one. Not so much for what had been lost but for what could have been. Imagine if they’d been a family, if he and his brothers had grown up supported by their artist father. They could have been great together. Instead each of them had been forced to make his way alone.
No, he corrected. Not each of them. Until a few years ago, he and Ronan had had each other. They’d been a team. The twins.
He looked at his mother. She was getting older. She’d battled breast cancer a couple of years ago and had beaten the disease. That took courage. But she’d never been able to stand up to her husband. Not for herself and not for her sons.
“What?” his mother demanded, glaring at him. “What are you thinking?”
“Nothing.”
“Tell me.” Her lower lip trembled. “You think this is my fault, don’t you? You think I should have stood between each of you and your father. You think I betrayed you.” She raised her head. “I didn’t. I made sure you were all right. I was a good mother, but at the end of the day, Ceallach is my husband.”
And that matters more.
She didn’t say the words, but then she didn’t have to. They all knew what she was thinking. Worse, the sentiment wasn’t a surprise. Each of them had known it all their lives. Dad came first, even when that meant the back of a hand across the face...or shattered glass on the floor.
“Leave her alone,” Ceallach growled before Mathias could respond. “She’s done more than enough.”
“It only took thirty-five years for you to defend her, Dad. Impressive.” Nick’s voice was thick with sarcasm.
Ceallach lunged for him. Mathias pulled his brother back. He was exhausted—from not sleeping, from dealing with his family, from the fight that never seemed to end.
“Let it go,” he told Nick. “He’s not worth it. That’s what we never saw. He’s not worth it and he never was.”
“Mathias.” His mother’s expression turned pleading. “Don’t say that.”
Mathias ignored her. He waited until Nick nodded slightly, then glanced at Aidan and Del. They both nodded their agreement. Finally he looked at Ronan.
“I don’t have a dog in this fight,” Ronan said lightly.
Fury built up inside of Mathias. Fury born of too many questions and too much uncertainty.
She was right, but that didn’t make walking away from her any easier.
At three minutes to six, Mathias drove the short distance to his house. For reasons not clear to him, the family had decided to eat in. Maya and Elaine were going to cook and then they would all gather around the large table in his dining room. He walked in to find Nick and Ceallach standing toe to toe in the living room.
“You could have been great,” Ceallach yelled. “Instead you work with wood. It’s ridiculous. Do you know I found out you help out at that wedding place? What’s wrong with you?”
Mathias stood in the doorway. It would be so easy to back out, to pretend he’d forgotten about the meal. Then he remembered what Carol had told him—this was about Del and Maya. He had to do his best to keep the peace.
“Hey, Dad,” he called.
His father glanced at him, then turned back to Nick. “Even your brother still works with glass.”
Nick’s expression hardened. “Even, Dad? You always have to put down Mathias. You think we’re fooled, but we’re not. We all know who’s better and it’s not you.”
Ceallach’s face reddened. “He makes dishes.”
“Because of what you did. You couldn’t stand he’s more talented so you destroyed his work. You’re a hell of a father.”
Mathias moved to Nick’s side. “It’s okay,” he said quietly. “I’m done fighting that battle.”
Ceallach turned on him. “You never tried. You never took me on. You’re nowhere near as good as me, but you could have been something. Instead you gave up.”
Mathias glared at him. “You’re saying that it was a test? You did what you did as some perverse test of my character?”
Ronan walked into the living room. “Elaine said to stop yelling.”
“Yeah, that’s gonna work,” Nick muttered. He looked at Mathias. “He’s just saying that. You know he’s still messing with you.”
Mathias did know. He might not fully understand his father or the damage he’d done, but he could grasp the broad strokes of what had happened. He would have sworn that after all this time, he would be better at handling it, but his father still had the ability to get to him.
“You three have disappointed me,” Ceallach said. “I expected more of my sons.”
“Not nearly as much as we expected of you,” Nick shot back.
“You have two other sons,” Mathias added. “They’re good men with great characters. You know what, Dad, I think the reason you don’t want to deal with them is that you know you had nothing to do with who they are. At the end of the day, you’re still an asshole and they’re still good guys and you can’t stand that.”
His father started for him. “You dare to speak to me that way?”
Mathias had never been one to fight, but right now he was more than willing to take on his father. “I dare a whole lot more than that.”
Ceallach raised his fist. Nick got between them. Mathias had no idea where this was going but before he could find out, Ronan grabbed his arm and dragged him back.
“There’s no win in this,” his brother told him. “Not for you.”
Because Mathias had never been the fighter in the family. That job was Nick’s. Maybe it was time for things to change.
“We all need this to end,” he growled.
“Maybe, but not this way. The only person you’re going to hurt is yourself.”
Elaine walked into the living room, her eyes filled with tears. “Stop it!” she demanded. “Stop fighting. This is supposed to be a happy dinner. Del and Maya are getting married tomorrow. You have to stop fighting all the time. We’re a family. We should be nice to each other.”
“Kids learn from their fathers,” Nick said as he glared at his father. “Tell him to quit ignoring his two oldest sons and quit browbeating the rest of us.”
“Stop being a girl,” Ceallach said disdainfully.
Nick lunged for him. Both Ronan and Mathias pulled him back. Aidan and Del appeared and got in front of their father.
“I won’t have this,” Elaine shouted. “Stop it. Do you hear me? Stop it!”
“She’s right,” Mathias told Nick. “There’s no point. You’ll never win. You won’t break even. Worse, she’ll side with him and you’ll be the bad guy. Don’t bother. That’s the advantage of growing up, bro. We don’t have to care about him anymore.”
Their mother hurried forward. “Don’t say that,” she told Mathias. “He’s your father. He can’t help who he is.”
“You believe that, Mom?” he asked. “Do you actually believe the mighty Ceallach Mitchell can’t change his behavior?”
She looked from her husband to her son. “I just want us all to get along.”
Mathias felt the flood of emotions. He took a couple of deep breaths, then let the feelings wash over him. Regret, he supposed. That was the biggest one. Not so much for what had been lost but for what could have been. Imagine if they’d been a family, if he and his brothers had grown up supported by their artist father. They could have been great together. Instead each of them had been forced to make his way alone.
No, he corrected. Not each of them. Until a few years ago, he and Ronan had had each other. They’d been a team. The twins.
He looked at his mother. She was getting older. She’d battled breast cancer a couple of years ago and had beaten the disease. That took courage. But she’d never been able to stand up to her husband. Not for herself and not for her sons.
“What?” his mother demanded, glaring at him. “What are you thinking?”
“Nothing.”
“Tell me.” Her lower lip trembled. “You think this is my fault, don’t you? You think I should have stood between each of you and your father. You think I betrayed you.” She raised her head. “I didn’t. I made sure you were all right. I was a good mother, but at the end of the day, Ceallach is my husband.”
And that matters more.
She didn’t say the words, but then she didn’t have to. They all knew what she was thinking. Worse, the sentiment wasn’t a surprise. Each of them had known it all their lives. Dad came first, even when that meant the back of a hand across the face...or shattered glass on the floor.
“Leave her alone,” Ceallach growled before Mathias could respond. “She’s done more than enough.”
“It only took thirty-five years for you to defend her, Dad. Impressive.” Nick’s voice was thick with sarcasm.
Ceallach lunged for him. Mathias pulled his brother back. He was exhausted—from not sleeping, from dealing with his family, from the fight that never seemed to end.
“Let it go,” he told Nick. “He’s not worth it. That’s what we never saw. He’s not worth it and he never was.”
“Mathias.” His mother’s expression turned pleading. “Don’t say that.”
Mathias ignored her. He waited until Nick nodded slightly, then glanced at Aidan and Del. They both nodded their agreement. Finally he looked at Ronan.
“I don’t have a dog in this fight,” Ronan said lightly.
Fury built up inside of Mathias. Fury born of too many questions and too much uncertainty.
