Seductive Chaos
Page 67
“I couldn’t stand it if you hated me the way the rest of them do. Not you. Never you,” he whispered and I had to lean in close to hear him.
His fingers squeezed mine and I could feel the erratic beat of his heart beneath my skin.
“I don’t hate you, Cole,” I told him honestly and the naked relief on his face left me speechless.
We stood like that for a while, with Cole’s hand clutching mine, pressed to his chest, while I looked up at this sad and broken man who had always seemed so untouchable. I had never thought I’d see the day where anything wrecked him.
But that day had come.
“Vivian. We need to go,” Theo said, snapping me out of my Cole induced stupor. I pulled my hand from Cole’s and backed away, all too aware of how this must look to Theo, who looked anything but happy. He was staring at Cole, who had dropped his head, his chin colliding with his chest.
I didn’t want to leave Cole like this. Despite everything, I just couldn’t.
“This is why you didn’t want to go on a date with me. You’re still hung up on this guy,” Theo said, as though he couldn’t understand what I was thinking.
“No. That had nothing to do with it,” I lied.
“Look, I’d rather know this now then get into something with you and have my heart broken. If you’re still in love with this guy, then just say so.”
Whoa! Who had said anything about love?
Oh that’s right. I had at dinner. Way to go, Vivian!
“It has nothing to do with me not being over him. I just can’t leave him when he’s like this,” I countered.
Theo shook his head and reached out to take ahold of Cole’s arm. Cole tried to pull back and almost lost his footing again.
“Let go of me, jackass!” Cole seethed.
“We’re going to get you home. Chill out,” Theo said with annoyance.
I blinked in surprise. Theo looked back at me nonplussed. “You coming?” he asked.
I nodded and followed Theo as he pulled a barely walking Cole out to his car.
The ride to Cole’s apartment was tense, even after Cole had passed out and started to snore.
A few minutes later, we were parked and I was struggling with something to say.
If there was anything I could take away from this date gone wrong, is that Theo deserved more than a woman who would never be able to give him her heart. Not when it foolishly belonged to someone else. Someone who most likely would never give his in return.
“It’s okay, Vivian,” Theo murmured, picking up on my internal tirade.
“I don’t know why I can’t get over him. I mean, look at him!” I despaired, indicating Cole in the backseat, sprawled out and drooling all over the upholstery.
Theo gave me a wry smile. “We can’t help who want,” he responded sagely.
Truer words have never been spoken.
The two of us struggled to get Cole out of the car and up the stairs to his apartment. And while I rooted around in his pockets for his keys, I blushed when Cole stirred long enough to tell me to tug on his junk a bit.
Finally we got Cole into his apartment and deposited him on the couch. Theo stood awkwardly by the door as I pulled off Cole’s shoes and covered him with a blanket.
“I should probably stay. You know, to make sure he doesn’t choke on his vomit or anything,” I said, following Theo out into the hallway.
“How will you get back to your place? Do you need me to stay with you?” he asked. He really was such a nice guy. I wanted to slap myself silly for not jumping at the chance to be with him. It was time to start questioning my sanity.
But Theo was right. You can’t help who you want. The heart is a senseless bitch.
“That’s okay, thank you though. I’ll call a cab,” I said, wrapping my arms around my body. It was freezing in the hallway.
Theo dug into his pocket and pulled out some cash pushing it into my hand. “For the cab,” he said and I tried to give it back to him.
“I can’t take this,” I insisted but Theo wouldn’t hear of it.
“Please, for me,” he urged and I clutched the money in my hand.
“Thank you, Theo. For everything. And I’m so sorry this was such an epic failure,” I said, trying to smile but finding the muscles wouldn’t work. I felt like such a jerk.
“It wasn’t so bad. It’ll definitely prove a conversation starter down the road. The world’s worst first date,” he quipped and this time I found that I could smile. He was making all of this so easy.
He held out his hand for me to shake. “Friends?” he asked, though I saw it pained him to say it.
I shook his hand firmly. “Most definitely,” I promised. He held my hand a beat longer than necessary.
When he finally let go, I felt a little better and thought that maybe I hadn’t ruined everything after all.
Cole started moaning from the apartment and I knew I should get back inside.
“Good luck with all that. If you need anything, you know how to reach me,” Theo said. I nodded and watched him walk down the hallway before going back inside.
Cole was trying to sit up but wasn’t very successful. “I need to piss,” he muttered, starting to unzip himself.
Oh hell no!
I hurried over to him, kicking off my heels and hoisted him to his feet.
He was practically dead weight and I sagged underneath him, both of us careening into the couch.
“Whoopsie daisy,” Cole laughed as I tried to get us upright.
His fingers squeezed mine and I could feel the erratic beat of his heart beneath my skin.
“I don’t hate you, Cole,” I told him honestly and the naked relief on his face left me speechless.
We stood like that for a while, with Cole’s hand clutching mine, pressed to his chest, while I looked up at this sad and broken man who had always seemed so untouchable. I had never thought I’d see the day where anything wrecked him.
But that day had come.
“Vivian. We need to go,” Theo said, snapping me out of my Cole induced stupor. I pulled my hand from Cole’s and backed away, all too aware of how this must look to Theo, who looked anything but happy. He was staring at Cole, who had dropped his head, his chin colliding with his chest.
I didn’t want to leave Cole like this. Despite everything, I just couldn’t.
“This is why you didn’t want to go on a date with me. You’re still hung up on this guy,” Theo said, as though he couldn’t understand what I was thinking.
“No. That had nothing to do with it,” I lied.
“Look, I’d rather know this now then get into something with you and have my heart broken. If you’re still in love with this guy, then just say so.”
Whoa! Who had said anything about love?
Oh that’s right. I had at dinner. Way to go, Vivian!
“It has nothing to do with me not being over him. I just can’t leave him when he’s like this,” I countered.
Theo shook his head and reached out to take ahold of Cole’s arm. Cole tried to pull back and almost lost his footing again.
“Let go of me, jackass!” Cole seethed.
“We’re going to get you home. Chill out,” Theo said with annoyance.
I blinked in surprise. Theo looked back at me nonplussed. “You coming?” he asked.
I nodded and followed Theo as he pulled a barely walking Cole out to his car.
The ride to Cole’s apartment was tense, even after Cole had passed out and started to snore.
A few minutes later, we were parked and I was struggling with something to say.
If there was anything I could take away from this date gone wrong, is that Theo deserved more than a woman who would never be able to give him her heart. Not when it foolishly belonged to someone else. Someone who most likely would never give his in return.
“It’s okay, Vivian,” Theo murmured, picking up on my internal tirade.
“I don’t know why I can’t get over him. I mean, look at him!” I despaired, indicating Cole in the backseat, sprawled out and drooling all over the upholstery.
Theo gave me a wry smile. “We can’t help who want,” he responded sagely.
Truer words have never been spoken.
The two of us struggled to get Cole out of the car and up the stairs to his apartment. And while I rooted around in his pockets for his keys, I blushed when Cole stirred long enough to tell me to tug on his junk a bit.
Finally we got Cole into his apartment and deposited him on the couch. Theo stood awkwardly by the door as I pulled off Cole’s shoes and covered him with a blanket.
“I should probably stay. You know, to make sure he doesn’t choke on his vomit or anything,” I said, following Theo out into the hallway.
“How will you get back to your place? Do you need me to stay with you?” he asked. He really was such a nice guy. I wanted to slap myself silly for not jumping at the chance to be with him. It was time to start questioning my sanity.
But Theo was right. You can’t help who you want. The heart is a senseless bitch.
“That’s okay, thank you though. I’ll call a cab,” I said, wrapping my arms around my body. It was freezing in the hallway.
Theo dug into his pocket and pulled out some cash pushing it into my hand. “For the cab,” he said and I tried to give it back to him.
“I can’t take this,” I insisted but Theo wouldn’t hear of it.
“Please, for me,” he urged and I clutched the money in my hand.
“Thank you, Theo. For everything. And I’m so sorry this was such an epic failure,” I said, trying to smile but finding the muscles wouldn’t work. I felt like such a jerk.
“It wasn’t so bad. It’ll definitely prove a conversation starter down the road. The world’s worst first date,” he quipped and this time I found that I could smile. He was making all of this so easy.
He held out his hand for me to shake. “Friends?” he asked, though I saw it pained him to say it.
I shook his hand firmly. “Most definitely,” I promised. He held my hand a beat longer than necessary.
When he finally let go, I felt a little better and thought that maybe I hadn’t ruined everything after all.
Cole started moaning from the apartment and I knew I should get back inside.
“Good luck with all that. If you need anything, you know how to reach me,” Theo said. I nodded and watched him walk down the hallway before going back inside.
Cole was trying to sit up but wasn’t very successful. “I need to piss,” he muttered, starting to unzip himself.
Oh hell no!
I hurried over to him, kicking off my heels and hoisted him to his feet.
He was practically dead weight and I sagged underneath him, both of us careening into the couch.
“Whoopsie daisy,” Cole laughed as I tried to get us upright.
