Shade's Fall
Page 25
She had texted Beth that she was fine and that she would see her in a few weeks, but she needed time. Beth had texted back, asking Lily to talk to her. She hadn’t replied to her texts or calls, though. She had slept practically that whole weekend, barely managing with her migraine to go to the local discount store to buy her some clothes and toiletries before coming back to her bed.
Lily felt so alone; she didn’t know how she could make it without Beth. It was a constant struggle not to call and talk to her; however, Lily couldn’t bring herself to break her silence.
She hadn’t cared that Beth had become involved in what she considered a sex club. She wasn’t so naïve that she hadn’t heard of them before, even if she and Beth had never talked about sex. Lily believed that it was her sister’s choice to make, just like it was Kaley’s.
What hurt Lily and what she couldn’t understand were the lies Beth had used to conceal her other life. Lily had thought they had confided everything to each other, and yet, she had become a part of a lifestyle that condoned free sex with every member and hadn’t told her, and had actually taken devious measures to keep it hidden from her.
Beth had obviously picked The Last Riders over her. With them, she could be herself while with Lily she had felt compelled to hide her deepening relationships with them. Beth had pulled away from her; it was as simple as that.
The one person she had trusted in the whole world had lied to her on numerous occasions to protect The Last Riders’ code of secrecy.
Lily blinked the tears from her eyes, brushing her hair back from her face.
She rose from the bench, continuing on to her dorm. She had to pass the parking lot in front of her dorm where the sun glinted off the parked chrome motorcycles. Lily paused, wishing she had noticed them sooner. She could have turned around before they’d seen her.
Lily kept walking, seeing Beth standing by the doors to her dorm.
“Hello, Lily.” Her sister’s anxious face watched for her reaction.
“Beth.”
Beth took a step forward, but Lily took a step back, her face twisting into a painful mask.
“Please talk to me, Lily. I can’t bear this silence from you,” Beth pleaded.
Lily nodded her head. She didn’t want to take Beth to her room, yet she didn’t want to stay where the passersby could overhear. Lily pointed to a shaded bench under a large tree.
“Are you doing okay?” Beth asked once they were seated.
“I’m doing fine. Classes are pretty much the same,” Lily said, shrugging.
“Lily, I’d like to explain what you saw that night.”
She winced at her sister’s words. “What I saw was self-explanatory.”
“Yes, it was.” Beth took a deep breath. “But it’s not ugly the way Kaley said. We all care about each other, Lily. We’re friends that—”
“Have sex with each other,” Lily finished, looking down at her clenched hands, determined not to snap the red band in front of her sister.
“Yes—no. I don’t have sex with the other members,” Beth explained.
“Kaley said to become a member you have to have sex with the original members.” This time her hand snapped the band, despite her promise to herself.
“Yes, but I didn’t. I became a member because several of them felt they owed me a marker or wanted Razer’s vote in the future. Viper gave me his vote when you were hurt in the accident because I didn’t freak out on Ton. Some gave me theirs because I helped solve Gavin’s murder.”
“So you got all your votes that way?” Lily asked.
“No,” her sister admitted quietly.
Lily twisted the band on her wrist tighter. “I don’t need to hear this, Beth.”
“Lily, I just didn’t feel comfortable discussing this with you.”
“I understand.” And Lily did; it was something she was uncomfortable discussing in detail. “It’s hard to talk to someone who freaks out over every little thing.”
“You don’t, sweetheart.” Beth tried to touch her hand, but Lily pulled away.
Lily stared straight ahead, focusing on a tree to her left, not letting her eyes go to the men sitting on their bikes, watching them intently.
“Who are the original members that Kaley was talking about?” Lily asked the question she knew was going to hurt the most.
Beth hesitated, however she answered her low question. “Viper, Cash, Rider, Train, Lucky, Knox, Razer and Shade.”
Unconsciously, Lily’s hand went to the skin over her heart, rubbing the flesh.
“Your husband is one of the men who gives sexual votes to women who enter the club?” Lily couldn’t hide her disbelief that Beth would let Razer have sex with other women.
“He doesn’t vote anymore. He hasn’t since we broke up three years ago.”
“That’s why you broke up?”
“No, we broke up because I thought he had cheated on me with Bliss. He hadn’t.”
“I see. Do Sex Piston and her crew know about The Last Riders?”
“Yes.”
“So, everyone you're close to knew, except me,” Lily stated. “Me, you didn’t tell.”
“No. I didn’t know if you would be able to handle the life I have with Razer. I didn’t want you to think less of me,” Beth confessed.
“Instead, you just shut me out.” Lily gave her sister a sad smile. “I would never have judged you on your sex life, Beth. Because I have hang-ups doesn’t make me believe others should. What hurt me was the deception. You lied to conceal what was going on.” Lily felt tears slide down her cheeks. No, the details didn’t matter, but the lies definitely did. “I’ve never lied to you, ever, and I didn’t think you had to me, either. I’m hurt, but I’ll get over it probably in a few days. You know I never could stay mad for long.” Lily looked at her sister’s pained expression. She didn’t know what else to say, though. It was like her feelings toward Beth were encased in ice. She couldn’t mend her sister’s broken heart when her own was broken.
“All right. Will you at least quit ignoring my texts and calls?”
“Yes.” Lily got to her feet, picking up her backpack.
“Do you want to go get a bite to eat before you go inside?” Beth’s hopeful expression didn’t sway Lily. She didn’t want to be near Shade ever again.
“No, thanks.”
“How about I drive down this weekend and bring your suitcases here? You have to need clothes.”
“I already bought some new ones. You can box up what’s in my room and give them to the church. I have a test on Monday, so this weekend isn’t a good time. I’ll see you for Thanksgiving.”
Without another word, Lily went inside the building, not letting her gaze return to the parking lot. She wanted to run back into her sister’s arms, but she knew she couldn’t. She didn’t trust her anymore.
* * *
Beth watched her sister walk through the doors before she couldn’t hold it back any longer. She buried her face in her hands, heartbroken at the devastation she had caused with her secrecy. Lily was never going to forgive her. She had broken Lily’s faith in her. She could see it in her delicate, pale face.
Lily felt so alone; she didn’t know how she could make it without Beth. It was a constant struggle not to call and talk to her; however, Lily couldn’t bring herself to break her silence.
She hadn’t cared that Beth had become involved in what she considered a sex club. She wasn’t so naïve that she hadn’t heard of them before, even if she and Beth had never talked about sex. Lily believed that it was her sister’s choice to make, just like it was Kaley’s.
What hurt Lily and what she couldn’t understand were the lies Beth had used to conceal her other life. Lily had thought they had confided everything to each other, and yet, she had become a part of a lifestyle that condoned free sex with every member and hadn’t told her, and had actually taken devious measures to keep it hidden from her.
Beth had obviously picked The Last Riders over her. With them, she could be herself while with Lily she had felt compelled to hide her deepening relationships with them. Beth had pulled away from her; it was as simple as that.
The one person she had trusted in the whole world had lied to her on numerous occasions to protect The Last Riders’ code of secrecy.
Lily blinked the tears from her eyes, brushing her hair back from her face.
She rose from the bench, continuing on to her dorm. She had to pass the parking lot in front of her dorm where the sun glinted off the parked chrome motorcycles. Lily paused, wishing she had noticed them sooner. She could have turned around before they’d seen her.
Lily kept walking, seeing Beth standing by the doors to her dorm.
“Hello, Lily.” Her sister’s anxious face watched for her reaction.
“Beth.”
Beth took a step forward, but Lily took a step back, her face twisting into a painful mask.
“Please talk to me, Lily. I can’t bear this silence from you,” Beth pleaded.
Lily nodded her head. She didn’t want to take Beth to her room, yet she didn’t want to stay where the passersby could overhear. Lily pointed to a shaded bench under a large tree.
“Are you doing okay?” Beth asked once they were seated.
“I’m doing fine. Classes are pretty much the same,” Lily said, shrugging.
“Lily, I’d like to explain what you saw that night.”
She winced at her sister’s words. “What I saw was self-explanatory.”
“Yes, it was.” Beth took a deep breath. “But it’s not ugly the way Kaley said. We all care about each other, Lily. We’re friends that—”
“Have sex with each other,” Lily finished, looking down at her clenched hands, determined not to snap the red band in front of her sister.
“Yes—no. I don’t have sex with the other members,” Beth explained.
“Kaley said to become a member you have to have sex with the original members.” This time her hand snapped the band, despite her promise to herself.
“Yes, but I didn’t. I became a member because several of them felt they owed me a marker or wanted Razer’s vote in the future. Viper gave me his vote when you were hurt in the accident because I didn’t freak out on Ton. Some gave me theirs because I helped solve Gavin’s murder.”
“So you got all your votes that way?” Lily asked.
“No,” her sister admitted quietly.
Lily twisted the band on her wrist tighter. “I don’t need to hear this, Beth.”
“Lily, I just didn’t feel comfortable discussing this with you.”
“I understand.” And Lily did; it was something she was uncomfortable discussing in detail. “It’s hard to talk to someone who freaks out over every little thing.”
“You don’t, sweetheart.” Beth tried to touch her hand, but Lily pulled away.
Lily stared straight ahead, focusing on a tree to her left, not letting her eyes go to the men sitting on their bikes, watching them intently.
“Who are the original members that Kaley was talking about?” Lily asked the question she knew was going to hurt the most.
Beth hesitated, however she answered her low question. “Viper, Cash, Rider, Train, Lucky, Knox, Razer and Shade.”
Unconsciously, Lily’s hand went to the skin over her heart, rubbing the flesh.
“Your husband is one of the men who gives sexual votes to women who enter the club?” Lily couldn’t hide her disbelief that Beth would let Razer have sex with other women.
“He doesn’t vote anymore. He hasn’t since we broke up three years ago.”
“That’s why you broke up?”
“No, we broke up because I thought he had cheated on me with Bliss. He hadn’t.”
“I see. Do Sex Piston and her crew know about The Last Riders?”
“Yes.”
“So, everyone you're close to knew, except me,” Lily stated. “Me, you didn’t tell.”
“No. I didn’t know if you would be able to handle the life I have with Razer. I didn’t want you to think less of me,” Beth confessed.
“Instead, you just shut me out.” Lily gave her sister a sad smile. “I would never have judged you on your sex life, Beth. Because I have hang-ups doesn’t make me believe others should. What hurt me was the deception. You lied to conceal what was going on.” Lily felt tears slide down her cheeks. No, the details didn’t matter, but the lies definitely did. “I’ve never lied to you, ever, and I didn’t think you had to me, either. I’m hurt, but I’ll get over it probably in a few days. You know I never could stay mad for long.” Lily looked at her sister’s pained expression. She didn’t know what else to say, though. It was like her feelings toward Beth were encased in ice. She couldn’t mend her sister’s broken heart when her own was broken.
“All right. Will you at least quit ignoring my texts and calls?”
“Yes.” Lily got to her feet, picking up her backpack.
“Do you want to go get a bite to eat before you go inside?” Beth’s hopeful expression didn’t sway Lily. She didn’t want to be near Shade ever again.
“No, thanks.”
“How about I drive down this weekend and bring your suitcases here? You have to need clothes.”
“I already bought some new ones. You can box up what’s in my room and give them to the church. I have a test on Monday, so this weekend isn’t a good time. I’ll see you for Thanksgiving.”
Without another word, Lily went inside the building, not letting her gaze return to the parking lot. She wanted to run back into her sister’s arms, but she knew she couldn’t. She didn’t trust her anymore.
* * *
Beth watched her sister walk through the doors before she couldn’t hold it back any longer. She buried her face in her hands, heartbroken at the devastation she had caused with her secrecy. Lily was never going to forgive her. She had broken Lily’s faith in her. She could see it in her delicate, pale face.
