Shadows in the Silence
Page 109
Will and Marcus made their way back to me through the debris. Marcus offered me an encouraging and triumphant smile that still couldn’t hide his sadness. His clothes were torn, filthy, and bloodied, and his skin was marred by still-healing wounds.
“We’ve won,” Marcus said. “Ellie, you did it.”
“No,” I replied. “We all did it.”
His gaze seemed to search for the injuries bringing me down, but he would find none. “The angels are helping our forces kill the last of the enemy. The demonic reapers who fought with Cadan are spared but the ones loyal to Hell are destroyed. There may be pockets of them somewhere in the world, but there’s no way they can replenish their ranks before we find the last of them and wipe them out. The war is finished.”
I felt a rush of relief and joy, and I smiled. “I never thought this day would come.”
“Did our friends make it?” Will asked.
“Ava is dead,” Marcus said, his voice grave. “She was taken down by a demonic vir. Cadan is helping the others look for survivors.”
Will looked toward the now-quiet battlefield. “My mother?”
“Madeleine was injured badly, but she’ll live. Evolet is with her now, making sure she heals.”
“You’ve done so well, Marcus,” I told him. “If you find Azrael, please thank him for me. And give Kate my love.”
He hesitated before leaving, but then he yanked me into him and gave me a strong hug, burying his face in my hair. The hallowed glaive slipped from my fingers and clattered to the ground as I wrapped my arms around him with the last of my strength. “You’re the one who has done well,” he whispered. “I’ll be seeing you soon.”
He pulled away, and I was sad to watch him leave. I wanted to follow him, to help Cadan find the survivors, to keep on going, but I was so tired. My breathing became even more ragged and I closed my eyes, feeling the wind on my skin, savoring it. My wings vanished back into my shoulders, unable to hold their form any longer. I was falling before I realized it, but strong arms looped around me, and I sensed him all over, took in his scent, felt his rough cheek against mine.
“I’ve got you,” Will whispered, his voice so weak I wanted to cling to him and comfort him. He knew as well as I that I was finished. The endless power of the hallowed glaive would take one more life tonight.
He picked me up and carried me to a soft patch of grass at the top of Armageddon, and this was the place where I would die. The clouds had gone and the night sky had opened up with a cascade of bright stars. The air was cool on my skin and where Will touched me, I was warm. It wasn’t so hard to breathe now that I was lying down, but breaths came slower and shorter. My heartbeat wasn’t so fierce now, but it was pumping a sense of serenity through me that I didn’t fear. For the first time in many, many lifetimes, I wasn’t afraid to die.
But when I looked up into Will’s face, everything changed. The sorrow in his green eyes was so terrible and so beautiful that I was overcome by it. I’d only seen his tears a handful of times in five hundred years, but still they shattered me every time.
“I can’t do this,” he said, trembling. “I can’t say good-bye to you forever.”
I offered him a smile as sweet and as big as I could summon, but I was so fragile. “It’s all right. This was meant to be.”
He bit his lip and said, “So were we.”
Tears rolled over my cheeks and slipped into my hair as I gazed up at him. “I am so sorry. I love you. Please know that. It’s the only thing that matters now.”
He shook his head. “You can’t leave me alone.”
“But you’re not alone,” I told him. “You have your mother and your brother and your friends.”
He touched my cheek and traced my lips. “I’m nothing without you.”
“Do you remember the night you kissed me for the first time, when I told you that I wanted to live?”
He exhaled, the breath stolen from him, and he nodded. “Yes. oh, God, Ell…”
I smiled at him. “I have. I have lived. Thank you.”
He said nothing, but a tear fell from his eye and hit my cheek.
Time had passed, but I couldn’t tell how much. Will held me in his arms and I curled my body into him, feeling the rise and fall of his chest as he breathed, listening to his heartbeat. My own heart slowed and I grew weaker as my body broke down, but I wouldn’t untangle my fingers from around his shirt. I memorized him, his scent, the feel of him holding me, every contour of muscle beneath his skin, every rip and tear in his clothes from battle…. I wanted this moment to burn itself into my mind, into my soul, so that wherever I went once I closed my eyes this last time, I wouldn’t forget him.
“Ellie,” he whispered, breaking the silence between us.
I tightened my fingers around the cloth of his shirt. “Yes?” My voice was tiny, soft, barely anything more than beating butterfly wings.
His chest shuddered and I felt a warm drop of tear fall onto my hand. “You were quiet. I thought you’d gone.”
“No,” I told him. “But I’m so tired.”
“Stay here, please,” he whispered. “I’m begging you.”
“I’ll try to come back,” I promised. “I’ll find a way. Will you wait for me?”
“I’ll wait forever.” His lips pressed against my hair and he tilted my face up. “I swear to you that I will still be here. Even if you never come back, I’ll keep waiting for you.”
“We’ve won,” Marcus said. “Ellie, you did it.”
“No,” I replied. “We all did it.”
His gaze seemed to search for the injuries bringing me down, but he would find none. “The angels are helping our forces kill the last of the enemy. The demonic reapers who fought with Cadan are spared but the ones loyal to Hell are destroyed. There may be pockets of them somewhere in the world, but there’s no way they can replenish their ranks before we find the last of them and wipe them out. The war is finished.”
I felt a rush of relief and joy, and I smiled. “I never thought this day would come.”
“Did our friends make it?” Will asked.
“Ava is dead,” Marcus said, his voice grave. “She was taken down by a demonic vir. Cadan is helping the others look for survivors.”
Will looked toward the now-quiet battlefield. “My mother?”
“Madeleine was injured badly, but she’ll live. Evolet is with her now, making sure she heals.”
“You’ve done so well, Marcus,” I told him. “If you find Azrael, please thank him for me. And give Kate my love.”
He hesitated before leaving, but then he yanked me into him and gave me a strong hug, burying his face in my hair. The hallowed glaive slipped from my fingers and clattered to the ground as I wrapped my arms around him with the last of my strength. “You’re the one who has done well,” he whispered. “I’ll be seeing you soon.”
He pulled away, and I was sad to watch him leave. I wanted to follow him, to help Cadan find the survivors, to keep on going, but I was so tired. My breathing became even more ragged and I closed my eyes, feeling the wind on my skin, savoring it. My wings vanished back into my shoulders, unable to hold their form any longer. I was falling before I realized it, but strong arms looped around me, and I sensed him all over, took in his scent, felt his rough cheek against mine.
“I’ve got you,” Will whispered, his voice so weak I wanted to cling to him and comfort him. He knew as well as I that I was finished. The endless power of the hallowed glaive would take one more life tonight.
He picked me up and carried me to a soft patch of grass at the top of Armageddon, and this was the place where I would die. The clouds had gone and the night sky had opened up with a cascade of bright stars. The air was cool on my skin and where Will touched me, I was warm. It wasn’t so hard to breathe now that I was lying down, but breaths came slower and shorter. My heartbeat wasn’t so fierce now, but it was pumping a sense of serenity through me that I didn’t fear. For the first time in many, many lifetimes, I wasn’t afraid to die.
But when I looked up into Will’s face, everything changed. The sorrow in his green eyes was so terrible and so beautiful that I was overcome by it. I’d only seen his tears a handful of times in five hundred years, but still they shattered me every time.
“I can’t do this,” he said, trembling. “I can’t say good-bye to you forever.”
I offered him a smile as sweet and as big as I could summon, but I was so fragile. “It’s all right. This was meant to be.”
He bit his lip and said, “So were we.”
Tears rolled over my cheeks and slipped into my hair as I gazed up at him. “I am so sorry. I love you. Please know that. It’s the only thing that matters now.”
He shook his head. “You can’t leave me alone.”
“But you’re not alone,” I told him. “You have your mother and your brother and your friends.”
He touched my cheek and traced my lips. “I’m nothing without you.”
“Do you remember the night you kissed me for the first time, when I told you that I wanted to live?”
He exhaled, the breath stolen from him, and he nodded. “Yes. oh, God, Ell…”
I smiled at him. “I have. I have lived. Thank you.”
He said nothing, but a tear fell from his eye and hit my cheek.
Time had passed, but I couldn’t tell how much. Will held me in his arms and I curled my body into him, feeling the rise and fall of his chest as he breathed, listening to his heartbeat. My own heart slowed and I grew weaker as my body broke down, but I wouldn’t untangle my fingers from around his shirt. I memorized him, his scent, the feel of him holding me, every contour of muscle beneath his skin, every rip and tear in his clothes from battle…. I wanted this moment to burn itself into my mind, into my soul, so that wherever I went once I closed my eyes this last time, I wouldn’t forget him.
“Ellie,” he whispered, breaking the silence between us.
I tightened my fingers around the cloth of his shirt. “Yes?” My voice was tiny, soft, barely anything more than beating butterfly wings.
His chest shuddered and I felt a warm drop of tear fall onto my hand. “You were quiet. I thought you’d gone.”
“No,” I told him. “But I’m so tired.”
“Stay here, please,” he whispered. “I’m begging you.”
“I’ll try to come back,” I promised. “I’ll find a way. Will you wait for me?”
“I’ll wait forever.” His lips pressed against my hair and he tilted my face up. “I swear to you that I will still be here. Even if you never come back, I’ll keep waiting for you.”
