Shadows in the Silence
Page 81
“I didn’t mean that in a bad way,” Cadan said, interrupting my thoughts. “I’m sorry if I upset you.”
“No, I’m not upset,” I told him. “I was just thinking what a terrible idea it would be to tell Will what you just told me.”
“I have no plans to repeat that to him. Ever. And if you tell him what I said, before he kills me I’ll tell everyone how you snore.”
“I don’t snore!” I laughed. “Will would know if I snored.”
The air immediately grew thick with tension. I knew how Cadan felt about me, and what I just said was like rubbing Will and me right in his face. Why did I never stop to think before I opened my huge mouth? Cadan had sacrificed so much to help me and it had to be unbearably challenging for him to be around us all the time.
“He’s too polite to say anything,” Cadan said to break the awkwardness between us, but his voice was small and fragile.
I went along with it, trying to sound as if nothing had just happened. “My friend Kate isn’t, though, and after the million slumber parties we’ve had, she definitely would’ve told me—and kicked me awake to shut me up.”
“I’d have done the same,” he said with a grin.
I narrowed my gaze playfully at him. “So you’re admitting that you just lied. Slander’s illegal, you know.”
He scoffed and messed up my hair with his hand. “I’m a reaper. I live above the law. Human law, anyway.”
The door opened and Madeleine appeared, her green eyes fixed with interest on Cadan and me. Cadan took his arm back from around my shoulder slowly, almost cautiously. “I don’t mean to interrupt,” she said in a low, slow tone.
“I hope you don’t mind that I came up here.” As awkward as I felt, she still scared the hell out of me. This was Will’s mother. I wasn’t sure if I’d ever get used to it.
“Of course not, Ellie,” Madeleine said. “Everyone needs to retreat sometimes.”
Cadan stood and the space next to me felt cold suddenly. “I’d better get back and make myself useful.” He gave me a reassuring look, but mine in return was pleading and desperate for him to stay. His mouth tightened apologetically. It was clear he was just as scared of Madeleine as I was, but for different reasons.
As he left the room, Madeleine sat down next to me. Being alone with Will’s mother before I really knew anything about her was really quite terrifying. I’d always considered myself a sociable, chatty person, but that all flew out the window with Madeleine, who was obviously one of the biggest badasses on the planet. For five hundred years, she’d been the guardian of the relic I’d made to be so powerful it could summon any demon. I’d seen only a glimpse of her prowess in battle, but it was enough to know I’d want to have her on my side in any fight.
This was Will’s mother. Those two words kept spinning over and over in my head. She was impossibly beautiful. Her green-fire eyes and sweeping dark hair were the same as Will’s, and she was also nearly as tall as he was. Though her body was lithe, she had strength and a groundedness in her curves that showed how unbreakable she was.
“I have a glaive-like weapon,” she said, her lilting English accent breaking the harsh silence between us, “if you would like to train with one before you accept Azrael’s blade.”
“That would be excellent,” I replied with a small smile. “Thank you.”
“I could help you learn to use it.”
I nodded. “I’m so used to using two small swords that this will be a big change. I can manage if I have help.”
“Of course,” Madeleine said. “And I apologize if I chased Cadan away. He left in quite a hurry.”
I offered her a sympathetic look. “If you’re worried that he’s avoiding you, I think that he’s still in a bit of a shock.”
“We both are,” she agreed. “He and I will be able to work things out on our own time. I wondered if I’d run in to him or Bastian again eventually, but to be honest, I’m much more shocked to have seen him with you and Will. That was a curious sight.”
“Oh,” I said. “You want to know how we became friends?”
“If you don’t mind.”
I sat there, looking back, and the image of seeing Cadan’s face for the first time at that Halloween party flashed in my mind—after Will had punched the Phantom of the opera mask off, that is. “There isn’t much to it, I guess. He offered to help me. It took a while for me to trust him, but I’m glad I did. He’s saved my life many times now. He’s earned my trust.”
“And Will trusts him as well?”
“It took a lot longer for Will to come around,” I said honestly. I told her about Cadan risking his life to keep me informed of Bastian’s plans and saving me from Ivar. I talked about his kindness and comforting me when I was at my lowest. I told her the story of what happened the night Sammael was awakened, about Cadan protecting us from Bastian and then killing him. I even told Madeleine about Cadan taking me to the Rocky Mountains to retrieve the root that cured Will from Antares. She listened in silence, and I caught the ghost of a smile on her face when I had finished my story. “I don’t know what he was like when you knew him, but the Cadan I know now is a wonderful, good person and he means a lot to me.”
“I’m proud of him,” Madeleine said. “Cadan was much younger when I knew him, and he was desperate for his father’s approval. Beneath it all, he was good…and he was even my friend. He was there for me when Bastian was at his worst. I know Cadan only did the things he did to please his father, and his sins still seem to haunt him.”
“No, I’m not upset,” I told him. “I was just thinking what a terrible idea it would be to tell Will what you just told me.”
“I have no plans to repeat that to him. Ever. And if you tell him what I said, before he kills me I’ll tell everyone how you snore.”
“I don’t snore!” I laughed. “Will would know if I snored.”
The air immediately grew thick with tension. I knew how Cadan felt about me, and what I just said was like rubbing Will and me right in his face. Why did I never stop to think before I opened my huge mouth? Cadan had sacrificed so much to help me and it had to be unbearably challenging for him to be around us all the time.
“He’s too polite to say anything,” Cadan said to break the awkwardness between us, but his voice was small and fragile.
I went along with it, trying to sound as if nothing had just happened. “My friend Kate isn’t, though, and after the million slumber parties we’ve had, she definitely would’ve told me—and kicked me awake to shut me up.”
“I’d have done the same,” he said with a grin.
I narrowed my gaze playfully at him. “So you’re admitting that you just lied. Slander’s illegal, you know.”
He scoffed and messed up my hair with his hand. “I’m a reaper. I live above the law. Human law, anyway.”
The door opened and Madeleine appeared, her green eyes fixed with interest on Cadan and me. Cadan took his arm back from around my shoulder slowly, almost cautiously. “I don’t mean to interrupt,” she said in a low, slow tone.
“I hope you don’t mind that I came up here.” As awkward as I felt, she still scared the hell out of me. This was Will’s mother. I wasn’t sure if I’d ever get used to it.
“Of course not, Ellie,” Madeleine said. “Everyone needs to retreat sometimes.”
Cadan stood and the space next to me felt cold suddenly. “I’d better get back and make myself useful.” He gave me a reassuring look, but mine in return was pleading and desperate for him to stay. His mouth tightened apologetically. It was clear he was just as scared of Madeleine as I was, but for different reasons.
As he left the room, Madeleine sat down next to me. Being alone with Will’s mother before I really knew anything about her was really quite terrifying. I’d always considered myself a sociable, chatty person, but that all flew out the window with Madeleine, who was obviously one of the biggest badasses on the planet. For five hundred years, she’d been the guardian of the relic I’d made to be so powerful it could summon any demon. I’d seen only a glimpse of her prowess in battle, but it was enough to know I’d want to have her on my side in any fight.
This was Will’s mother. Those two words kept spinning over and over in my head. She was impossibly beautiful. Her green-fire eyes and sweeping dark hair were the same as Will’s, and she was also nearly as tall as he was. Though her body was lithe, she had strength and a groundedness in her curves that showed how unbreakable she was.
“I have a glaive-like weapon,” she said, her lilting English accent breaking the harsh silence between us, “if you would like to train with one before you accept Azrael’s blade.”
“That would be excellent,” I replied with a small smile. “Thank you.”
“I could help you learn to use it.”
I nodded. “I’m so used to using two small swords that this will be a big change. I can manage if I have help.”
“Of course,” Madeleine said. “And I apologize if I chased Cadan away. He left in quite a hurry.”
I offered her a sympathetic look. “If you’re worried that he’s avoiding you, I think that he’s still in a bit of a shock.”
“We both are,” she agreed. “He and I will be able to work things out on our own time. I wondered if I’d run in to him or Bastian again eventually, but to be honest, I’m much more shocked to have seen him with you and Will. That was a curious sight.”
“Oh,” I said. “You want to know how we became friends?”
“If you don’t mind.”
I sat there, looking back, and the image of seeing Cadan’s face for the first time at that Halloween party flashed in my mind—after Will had punched the Phantom of the opera mask off, that is. “There isn’t much to it, I guess. He offered to help me. It took a while for me to trust him, but I’m glad I did. He’s saved my life many times now. He’s earned my trust.”
“And Will trusts him as well?”
“It took a lot longer for Will to come around,” I said honestly. I told her about Cadan risking his life to keep me informed of Bastian’s plans and saving me from Ivar. I talked about his kindness and comforting me when I was at my lowest. I told her the story of what happened the night Sammael was awakened, about Cadan protecting us from Bastian and then killing him. I even told Madeleine about Cadan taking me to the Rocky Mountains to retrieve the root that cured Will from Antares. She listened in silence, and I caught the ghost of a smile on her face when I had finished my story. “I don’t know what he was like when you knew him, but the Cadan I know now is a wonderful, good person and he means a lot to me.”
“I’m proud of him,” Madeleine said. “Cadan was much younger when I knew him, and he was desperate for his father’s approval. Beneath it all, he was good…and he was even my friend. He was there for me when Bastian was at his worst. I know Cadan only did the things he did to please his father, and his sins still seem to haunt him.”
