Souls Unfractured
Page 95
“Yeah, AK explained. Flame, he told me everything about you. I kept asking about you, so he sat me down and told me. I just want to know you more. And you never really came out of your cabin, or even talked to me.” He paused, then added, “But I know you can’t be touched. AK was real clear about that.”
“Right,” was all I could say in response.
Asher looked behind him, and then back to me. “But Maddie can touch you.” I froze. Holding my breath I nodded my head. “It's all good,” he quickly replied. Turning a deep shade of red, he said, “She’s real pretty. And… and I’m glad she can touch you. I’m glad you have her.”
Maddie’s face flashed into my head, and I stated, “She’s fucking beautiful. She’s everything to me.”
“Yeah,” Asher said, then his face flushed redder still. “And Flame? Will you call me Little Ash? It’s what I’ve been getting called by all the brothers. Viking said it was my road name… and… and I like it. It feels new, different, like I’m someone else. Just, Asher reminds me of—”
“I get it,” I said, cutting him off, knowing I hated the fucking name Josiah just as much, if not more, as he hated Asher.
“Thanks,” Little Ash replied, and we returned to our silence. Just as I was about to get up, not knowing what the fuck else to say, Little Ash said, “I really like all the bikes round here.”
I sat back down to the grass, and said, “I’m good with bikes. Harley’s and Choppers especially.”
Little Ash smiled up at me and said, “AK told me you can build them from scratch.”
“Yeah.”
Little Ash dipped his head, then lifted his head, a new expression on his face. “Would you build me one, Flame? Vike said he’d teach me how to ride, but that I needed a bike. He said to talk to you about it.”
“Yeah, I could build you one,” I said.
“A black and chrome Fat Boy? Like yours, with Flames on the side? AK showed me how to use the net. I’ve been reading all about them and how they’re built. I wanted to understand how you built them in your work shop. Then AK told me you could customize the paintwork as well. He told me you’d done your Harley.” He turned his head away and said, “I went and had a look one night when I couldn’t sleep. And I loved it. I loved the flames and skulls on the side. It looks amazing, Flame. So if I could, I’d like one just like it. Just like yours.”
A warm feeling spread within my chest, and I said roughly, “Whatever you want.”
“Good,” Little Ash replied, a smile on his lips.
I frowned at why he was smiling, then he asked, “And can I watch you build it? In that workshop you got out back?”
I wondered why he’d want to fucking do that. But I shrugged and said, “Yeah. Never had anyone watch before, but… yeah, okay.”
“Good,” Little Ash said, his voice stronger. He went back to pulling up the grass, then asked, “And Flame?”
“Yeah?”
“I like living with AK. I get that you ain’t good with people being around you too much, except Maddie. I know you need space, but, do you think, that maybe, I could come round your place sometime? Just to, you know, hang around with you some?”
My chest tightened, imagining having my brother in my house. My brother. “Yeah.”
Little Ash breathed out a long breath, then sitting back said, “I think… I think I’m gonna like it here, Flame. I think I’m… I think I’m gonna like having a big brother.”
My heart fucking pounded, and not knowing what the fuck else to say, I just said, “Yeah.”
*****
Maddie
I had watched Flame call Asher over to sit with him. And I had watched as his back had tensed, and he muddled through a conversation. As I watched, my heart swelled with happiness.
“I like this look on you, Maddie.” I glanced to my left and looked up to Mae. Her blue eyes were shining as I took hold of her hand.
“For once, in my whole life, I like being me.”
“Because of Flame?” Mae asked.
I thought about her question. “Mostly, yes. He has brought me to life. But through him, I feel more at peace with myself. Does that make sense?”
Mae’s hands spread over her slightly rounded stomach, and she replied, “I know exactly what you mean.”
I tipped my head up at the sky, and embracing its vastness, said, “I never thought of myself as a strong person. But it is amazing how much strength you discover you have deep inside, when someone you love depends on you to be their rock, when they find themselves weak. How much courage you can muster, when the one you love relies on you to keep him from falling to the ground. And how much happiness can be harbored within your soul, when you allow someone into your heart.”
“Maddie,” Mae hushed, “I understand completely.”
I smiled at my sister. “You will make a fantastic mother, Mae.”
Mae’s smile faltered, and her head dropped slightly. “Do you think so?” she asked nervously. “We never had one, Maddie. How am I to know how to be a good mother?”
I squeezed Mae’s hand. “You may not have had a mother, but I have.”
Mae frowned. “You did not, Maddie. You were like me, and Bella. We never knew our parents.”
“I did,” I countered. Mae shook her head in protest. But I cut in and pronounced, “I had you.”
“Right,” was all I could say in response.
Asher looked behind him, and then back to me. “But Maddie can touch you.” I froze. Holding my breath I nodded my head. “It's all good,” he quickly replied. Turning a deep shade of red, he said, “She’s real pretty. And… and I’m glad she can touch you. I’m glad you have her.”
Maddie’s face flashed into my head, and I stated, “She’s fucking beautiful. She’s everything to me.”
“Yeah,” Asher said, then his face flushed redder still. “And Flame? Will you call me Little Ash? It’s what I’ve been getting called by all the brothers. Viking said it was my road name… and… and I like it. It feels new, different, like I’m someone else. Just, Asher reminds me of—”
“I get it,” I said, cutting him off, knowing I hated the fucking name Josiah just as much, if not more, as he hated Asher.
“Thanks,” Little Ash replied, and we returned to our silence. Just as I was about to get up, not knowing what the fuck else to say, Little Ash said, “I really like all the bikes round here.”
I sat back down to the grass, and said, “I’m good with bikes. Harley’s and Choppers especially.”
Little Ash smiled up at me and said, “AK told me you can build them from scratch.”
“Yeah.”
Little Ash dipped his head, then lifted his head, a new expression on his face. “Would you build me one, Flame? Vike said he’d teach me how to ride, but that I needed a bike. He said to talk to you about it.”
“Yeah, I could build you one,” I said.
“A black and chrome Fat Boy? Like yours, with Flames on the side? AK showed me how to use the net. I’ve been reading all about them and how they’re built. I wanted to understand how you built them in your work shop. Then AK told me you could customize the paintwork as well. He told me you’d done your Harley.” He turned his head away and said, “I went and had a look one night when I couldn’t sleep. And I loved it. I loved the flames and skulls on the side. It looks amazing, Flame. So if I could, I’d like one just like it. Just like yours.”
A warm feeling spread within my chest, and I said roughly, “Whatever you want.”
“Good,” Little Ash replied, a smile on his lips.
I frowned at why he was smiling, then he asked, “And can I watch you build it? In that workshop you got out back?”
I wondered why he’d want to fucking do that. But I shrugged and said, “Yeah. Never had anyone watch before, but… yeah, okay.”
“Good,” Little Ash said, his voice stronger. He went back to pulling up the grass, then asked, “And Flame?”
“Yeah?”
“I like living with AK. I get that you ain’t good with people being around you too much, except Maddie. I know you need space, but, do you think, that maybe, I could come round your place sometime? Just to, you know, hang around with you some?”
My chest tightened, imagining having my brother in my house. My brother. “Yeah.”
Little Ash breathed out a long breath, then sitting back said, “I think… I think I’m gonna like it here, Flame. I think I’m… I think I’m gonna like having a big brother.”
My heart fucking pounded, and not knowing what the fuck else to say, I just said, “Yeah.”
*****
Maddie
I had watched Flame call Asher over to sit with him. And I had watched as his back had tensed, and he muddled through a conversation. As I watched, my heart swelled with happiness.
“I like this look on you, Maddie.” I glanced to my left and looked up to Mae. Her blue eyes were shining as I took hold of her hand.
“For once, in my whole life, I like being me.”
“Because of Flame?” Mae asked.
I thought about her question. “Mostly, yes. He has brought me to life. But through him, I feel more at peace with myself. Does that make sense?”
Mae’s hands spread over her slightly rounded stomach, and she replied, “I know exactly what you mean.”
I tipped my head up at the sky, and embracing its vastness, said, “I never thought of myself as a strong person. But it is amazing how much strength you discover you have deep inside, when someone you love depends on you to be their rock, when they find themselves weak. How much courage you can muster, when the one you love relies on you to keep him from falling to the ground. And how much happiness can be harbored within your soul, when you allow someone into your heart.”
“Maddie,” Mae hushed, “I understand completely.”
I smiled at my sister. “You will make a fantastic mother, Mae.”
Mae’s smile faltered, and her head dropped slightly. “Do you think so?” she asked nervously. “We never had one, Maddie. How am I to know how to be a good mother?”
I squeezed Mae’s hand. “You may not have had a mother, but I have.”
Mae frowned. “You did not, Maddie. You were like me, and Bella. We never knew our parents.”
“I did,” I countered. Mae shook her head in protest. But I cut in and pronounced, “I had you.”
