Stupid Boy
Page 45
“Maybe I should call a meeting? Discuss cancelling the Dare?”
A sly grin pulled at her mouth. “I second that motion, Ms. Belle. Well done.”
The rest of the day flew by, and I’d felt somewhat lighter than I had in a long time. Just knowing the whole Dare thing was going to come to an end eased my mind. Truly, it hadn’t set right with me for some time—even before I’d kinda started falling for Kane. I’d just been so angry about the Kappas’ latest Dare victim, what they’d done to Olivia, that I hadn’t given much thought to what it truly meant. Despite the secrets I kept, I still had pride in the Deltas and what we stood for.
I’d let my anger lead me to an action that was irrational, and that made me little better than the Kappas.
I still wanted to keep a low profile with Kane—mainly because of his dealings with gambling. I’d wished I could try and convince him that there had to be something else he could do for income. He was intelligent—anyone could tell that just by talking to him. He was well-versed in so many subjects. Yet anytime I brought it up, he’d strategically shift gears. Change topics.
And, Kane had a way about him. A certain way that made me forget all about things like illegal gambling and betting on football games and taking money. The way he touched me with his eyes; how he held me in his arms? The way that profound stare never actually would leave mine?
It made me feel something I’d never, ever felt. In my life.
Cherished.
I hardly knew what to do about it.
The Christmas Bake Sale had gone well. We’d raised nearly a thousand dollars, which we split between the local Toys-for-Tots Christmas organization and the local soup kitchen for holiday dinners. Brax, although not completely convinced Kane should pursue me, had eased up on his brother and he and Kane had both helped pass out toys, and had worn red and white striped elf caps with bells on the end. Olivia and I had laughed, and for the first time in my life, everything seemed…real. Part of something other than a nightmare. And the more Kane was in my life, the more faded the ugly part of my past became.
My phone buzzed in my purse on my way out of Psych, and I stopped beneath the magnolia tree in the quad to answer it.
KANE: I HAVE A SURPRISE. DRESS WARM. DOUBLE WARM. MEET ME AT BRAX’S AT 6.
My mind flashed. I’d decided to call a meeting tonight, to disclose my reservations about the Dare. To bring it to an end. I suppose it could wait one more day.
ME: HINT? :-)
KANE: NICE TRY. SEE YA THEN.
When I got to Delta house, Murphy was just leaving. Friday night, she was no doubt heading to meet up with Josh. “Hey, can I borrow those fleece leggings again?” I asked.
She smiled and waved. “Second drawer, love. Right next to me knickers. And grab that black wooly jumper in the closet, too. It’ll look scrummy on you.”
“Thanks.” I shook my head, ran inside, and hurried through a shower. Pulling on the olive fleece leggings, I matched my Nordic winter boot socks, and a black turtle neck. I searched through Murphy’s closet. I knew a jumper was a sweater, only because she’d informed me of that British adjective not that long ago. It was baggy, hanging to my mid-thighs, but comfy and warm. Quickly, I dried my hair, applied a little make-up, pulled one of Murphy’s winter beanies over my head and zipped up my boots. Grabbing my bag, I headed out the door.
To Brax’s.
For some unknown surprise that left butterflies tickling my stomach.
“Why, bro? I don’t fuckin’ understand you, man!”
I stared calmly at Brax. He paced back and forth in his living room like a caged big cat. He’d stop. Rub his head. Put his hands on his hips, stare at the ceiling a moment. Swear. Pace more. I just waited.
“After everything we’ve been through, since we were kids,” Brax continued. “I don’t get why you have to do this.” He stopped and squatted down in front of where I sat on his sofa. “You’re better than this. I know you are. If I can escape it, brother, so can you.”
Brax didn’t know just how deep into the numbers I was.
How, no matter even if I did want out, I couldn’t get out. Not now. I looked at him, those crazy blue eyes pleading with me. I studied the scars he bore, and I remembered when they were fresh. Raw.
“I’ll be gone soon,” was all I could manage to say. “I won’t bring anything down on you, Brax—”
“Jesus, man, it’s not about that!” he growled. “You can’t keep up this life, Kane. The boys at the frat house might not be dangerous,” he pointed at me. “But I know you. You’re not playing with college boys. You’re using them as cover for the big boys.”
I eyed him quietly. Yeah, he knew me pretty well. “I’m not you, Brax,” I said. “I don’t have a golden arm. All I have is my perception and a way with numbers.” I gave him a stern look. “Let this go.”
“And let you what? Leave tread marks on Harper as you skid out of town?” he said harshly. “That ain’t you, either.”
He was definitely right about that. “I won’t hurt Harper,” I said.
“How can you make that promise when you know good and fuck well you’ll leave here. Leave her. You don’t think that’s hurting her?” He rubbed his head and stood. “She’s not like most girls here, man. There’s something about her. Something that reminds me of us.” He returned a hot glare at me. “I don’t think she’s the one you want to fuck over.”
A sly grin pulled at her mouth. “I second that motion, Ms. Belle. Well done.”
The rest of the day flew by, and I’d felt somewhat lighter than I had in a long time. Just knowing the whole Dare thing was going to come to an end eased my mind. Truly, it hadn’t set right with me for some time—even before I’d kinda started falling for Kane. I’d just been so angry about the Kappas’ latest Dare victim, what they’d done to Olivia, that I hadn’t given much thought to what it truly meant. Despite the secrets I kept, I still had pride in the Deltas and what we stood for.
I’d let my anger lead me to an action that was irrational, and that made me little better than the Kappas.
I still wanted to keep a low profile with Kane—mainly because of his dealings with gambling. I’d wished I could try and convince him that there had to be something else he could do for income. He was intelligent—anyone could tell that just by talking to him. He was well-versed in so many subjects. Yet anytime I brought it up, he’d strategically shift gears. Change topics.
And, Kane had a way about him. A certain way that made me forget all about things like illegal gambling and betting on football games and taking money. The way he touched me with his eyes; how he held me in his arms? The way that profound stare never actually would leave mine?
It made me feel something I’d never, ever felt. In my life.
Cherished.
I hardly knew what to do about it.
The Christmas Bake Sale had gone well. We’d raised nearly a thousand dollars, which we split between the local Toys-for-Tots Christmas organization and the local soup kitchen for holiday dinners. Brax, although not completely convinced Kane should pursue me, had eased up on his brother and he and Kane had both helped pass out toys, and had worn red and white striped elf caps with bells on the end. Olivia and I had laughed, and for the first time in my life, everything seemed…real. Part of something other than a nightmare. And the more Kane was in my life, the more faded the ugly part of my past became.
My phone buzzed in my purse on my way out of Psych, and I stopped beneath the magnolia tree in the quad to answer it.
KANE: I HAVE A SURPRISE. DRESS WARM. DOUBLE WARM. MEET ME AT BRAX’S AT 6.
My mind flashed. I’d decided to call a meeting tonight, to disclose my reservations about the Dare. To bring it to an end. I suppose it could wait one more day.
ME: HINT? :-)
KANE: NICE TRY. SEE YA THEN.
When I got to Delta house, Murphy was just leaving. Friday night, she was no doubt heading to meet up with Josh. “Hey, can I borrow those fleece leggings again?” I asked.
She smiled and waved. “Second drawer, love. Right next to me knickers. And grab that black wooly jumper in the closet, too. It’ll look scrummy on you.”
“Thanks.” I shook my head, ran inside, and hurried through a shower. Pulling on the olive fleece leggings, I matched my Nordic winter boot socks, and a black turtle neck. I searched through Murphy’s closet. I knew a jumper was a sweater, only because she’d informed me of that British adjective not that long ago. It was baggy, hanging to my mid-thighs, but comfy and warm. Quickly, I dried my hair, applied a little make-up, pulled one of Murphy’s winter beanies over my head and zipped up my boots. Grabbing my bag, I headed out the door.
To Brax’s.
For some unknown surprise that left butterflies tickling my stomach.
“Why, bro? I don’t fuckin’ understand you, man!”
I stared calmly at Brax. He paced back and forth in his living room like a caged big cat. He’d stop. Rub his head. Put his hands on his hips, stare at the ceiling a moment. Swear. Pace more. I just waited.
“After everything we’ve been through, since we were kids,” Brax continued. “I don’t get why you have to do this.” He stopped and squatted down in front of where I sat on his sofa. “You’re better than this. I know you are. If I can escape it, brother, so can you.”
Brax didn’t know just how deep into the numbers I was.
How, no matter even if I did want out, I couldn’t get out. Not now. I looked at him, those crazy blue eyes pleading with me. I studied the scars he bore, and I remembered when they were fresh. Raw.
“I’ll be gone soon,” was all I could manage to say. “I won’t bring anything down on you, Brax—”
“Jesus, man, it’s not about that!” he growled. “You can’t keep up this life, Kane. The boys at the frat house might not be dangerous,” he pointed at me. “But I know you. You’re not playing with college boys. You’re using them as cover for the big boys.”
I eyed him quietly. Yeah, he knew me pretty well. “I’m not you, Brax,” I said. “I don’t have a golden arm. All I have is my perception and a way with numbers.” I gave him a stern look. “Let this go.”
“And let you what? Leave tread marks on Harper as you skid out of town?” he said harshly. “That ain’t you, either.”
He was definitely right about that. “I won’t hurt Harper,” I said.
“How can you make that promise when you know good and fuck well you’ll leave here. Leave her. You don’t think that’s hurting her?” He rubbed his head and stood. “She’s not like most girls here, man. There’s something about her. Something that reminds me of us.” He returned a hot glare at me. “I don’t think she’s the one you want to fuck over.”
