Surrender to Me

Page 44

Desperation tightened every muscle in his body. He was leaving her for all the right reasons. She’d submitted beautifully tonight . . . but she insisted that she wasn’t built for this in the long run. After meeting Gordon, Hunter knew why she thought so; he just didn’t agree. And he couldn’t force her to conquer all her fears for him. As much as he hated the way his parents had split up, the Colonel was right. Hunter couldn’t hold Kata against her will. She had to want to stay. She had to want to conquer her own fears.
They were fucking doomed.
He glanced at the clock. Almost three a.m. He could measure the time they had left together in seconds, and it was ripping him apart. What the hell was he going to do with the enormous void she’d leave in his heart? No one was ever going to fill it. The best Hunter could hope for was that, someday, she’d be happy.
On the bedside table, his cell phone vibrated. Quickly, he snatched it up. Jack’s name popped up on his display. His time with Kata was up.
He went into high alert. “Talk to me.”
Jack heaved a long sigh. “We found Cortez Villarreal. He never appeared at Sexy Sirens, so we had to hunt him down at a rundown meth lab here in town.”
“And?” Hunter sat up, easing Kata’s head onto a pillow, then anchoring his feet on the floor.
“He’s dead. According to the homicide detective, he’s been dead for somewhere between forty-eight and seventy-two hours.”
Shit. That probably explained why no one else had come after Kata since Silva had taken potshots at her. Villarreal probably hadn’t had time to hire anyone else before his untimely demise.
“Cause of death?”
“Bullet to the brain. This was gang style, all the way. In fact, one of Villarreal’s rivals is taking credit. He’s got details of the murder that no one but the killer would know. It’s legit. I swiped Villarreal’s cell phone and laptop before the cops arrived. If they have anything, I’ll let you know.”
Relief eased through Hunter. “Thanks.”
They hung up, and he opened the blinds so the silvery moonlight rushed in, glowing over Kata’s skin. He stared at her with a sigh. This was it. The end. He had no reason to linger here . . . except that he loved her. Since it looked as if the danger to Kata had passed, he’d ask Jack and Deke to watch over her for a while, just in case. But he’d promised to sign her divorce papers and get out of her life. Even if it fucking killed him, he’d live up to his word.
Swallowing, he grabbed his phone and flipped it to camera mode. Just one image. He needed it, his own personal heaven and hell. Hunter wanted to remember Kata like this, his wife, in his bed, her soft expression sated, peaceful.
As soon as he clicked the button, he glanced at the picture, knowing this would be the first of a million times he’d look at it. The image was perfect. She looked absolutely beautiful and lush, her lips swollen, her hair in a wild tangle, almost covering the swells of her breasts . . . but not quite.
Squelching all his urges to wake her, take her, try to reason with her again, Hunter rose and shoved into his jeans. He dug into his pocket and fished out the rumpled papers inside and flattened them out. The word “Divorce” screamed out from the top of the first page. Cursing, he flipped to the back and saw Kata’s signature. Beside it sat a blank line, ready for him to add his name and legally declare this union over. He grabbed a pen, hesitated, damn near choking on rage and grief.
If the divorce would make her happy, he loved her enough to let her go.
Hunter pressed the pen to the page and forced himself to scrawl his name at the bottom. Resisting the urge to slam the pen down, he set it down gently, leaving both on the nightstand.
Before he could think any harder, he tossed on the rest of his clothes and headed for the door. One last time he glanced back at Kata sleeping in a lush tangle of silky hair, soft arms, and cotton sheets. His heart twisted in his chest. But there was nothing left to say or do, except leave.
He shut the door behind him with a quiet click. The finality of it swept desolation through him. Hunter leaned against the door, scrubbed a hand down his face.
Never had he done anything this fucking hard. He felt like he was breaking into a million pieces.
Suddenly, Tyler appeared in the hall. “You gone?”
“Yeah.” He glanced back at the closed door. “Take her back to my dad when she wakes up. Thanks for the offer to drive Kata and her mom to Lafayette.”
“Have to go back anyway.” Tyler shrugged, sandy hair falling over his green eyes. “You sure you want to do this? Kata is a hell of a woman.”
Fresh anguish swept through Hunter. In his head, he knew it wasn’t Tyler’s fault, but that didn’t stop him from grabbing the guy’s shirt and slamming him against the wall. “I know how you feel about other men’s wives. Even though I signed those divorce papers, she is never available to you. I will dismantle you limb from limb if you ever touch her. And last night never happened.”
With a pointed glance at Hunter’s fist in his shirt, Tyler went very still. “You done making an ass of yourself?”
Yeah, he probably had, Hunter conceded—and released Tyler.
The guy smoothed out his shirt. “Like you said when you invited me, I’m in love with someone else. But I gotta tell you, I think you’re bailing prematurely. Kata’s definitely got feelings for you.”
Feelings, yes. But those feelings didn’t trump her fear, and he wasn’t sure they ever would. Hunter loved her. He wished like hell that was enough.
KATA woke as the first rays of sun crept into the bedroom. Hunter! She opened her eyes, only to find the rest of the bed empty. She touched a trembling hand to the sheets where he’d lain. It was cold.
Just beyond, on the nightstand, familiar, rumpled pieces of oncecrisp paper lay faceup, all pages folded back at the staple to reveal the last one. A black pen lay ominously on top.
Dread banged through her, like mute cymbals crashing, their silence deafening.
As if they might bite her, Kata eased her hand toward the papers, picking them up slowly. A glance told her that Hunter had signed. In a few short months, they would no longer be husband and wife.
No, no, no!
Kata closed her eyes, and tears welled up. Everything between them last night had been perfect. If she could survive one night under his domination, she could do it again. And again. Couldn’t she? Hunter would never hurt her, never mean to run roughshod over her. Had she let the best man to ever come into her life go because she was too damn afraid to trust her heart?
Sobbing, Kata reached out for his pillow, dragging it to her chest. God, it smelled like him, wood, summer rain, and pure male. She clutched the pillow tighter against her body.
“He left a few hours ago.”
Gasping, Kata turned toward the voice. Tyler emerged from a chair in the dark corner across the room. He stood, approached. His musky-pine scent drifted across the room. Memories slammed her. He had been her stranger last night.
Instantly, her face flamed, her body twinged . . . but she clutched the pillow even tighter to her bare breasts. The thought of touching Tyler now left her cold. They might have been intimate the night before, but this was morning. All her intimacy belonged to Hunter, the man who had given Kata her wish . . . and her nightmare.
He winced. “Wow, didn’t take you long to figure last night out. While it might be interesting to proposition you, Hunter would kill me. And you’re not interested.”
Sadness settled into the shadows around his strong face, and Kata’s heart went out to him. She wasn’t sure she’d ever seen such loneliness on a man. “You’re in love with Luc’s wife.”
“There is that. I’ll give you a minute to . . .” He looked at the neatly folded pile of clothes on the nearby table. “Dress.”
“Thanks,” she choked out. “Did he say anything when he left?”
Kata was almost afraid of the answer, but she had to know.
“Villarreal is dead. As planned, last night Jack and Deke hunted him down, found his body. We think someone in his own gang killed him. The threat is over.”
Wow. So that was everything.
As planned? Kata paused, frowned . . . then something dawned on her. Last night hadn’t only been about saying good-bye. He’d hidden her until he knew she was safe, and he’d bribed her with the divorce she’d been fighting him for since their marriage began just so she wouldn’t run home and put herself in danger. He’d done that, at his own expense, for her.
Kata’s heart plummeted to her knees. Pain battered her . . . even as love welled up. She bit her lip, shoving down an urge to bury her face in her hands and cry. No matter how he felt, he’d promised to live up to his end of the deal. He might take control from her in the bedroom, but when it counted, he’d given her the ultimate power.
“If it’s any consolation, he was one miserable bastard. That man loves you.”
No, hearing that wasn’t any consolation at all. She felt fucking wretched.
“Where is he?” Maybe they could talk, slow things down while she got her head together, work it out. His leave wasn’t over for another thirty hours.
Pity crossed Tyler’s face. “Gone. His CO cut his leave short again. I’ll bet he’s out of the country by this afternoon.”
For at least six months. Oh, God. She wrapped her arms around her middle and fought new tears. God, this couldn’t be the end, not this way.
He closed the distance between them and put an awkward arm around her. “I’ll um . . . there’s juice and toast ready in the kitchen once you’re dressed.”
As soon as he stepped out, Kata swiped away the tears on her cheeks and tossed on her clothes. She stalked down the hall to the cheerful kitchen and the smell of burned wheat with peanut butter.
“Where’s your phone?” she demanded.
Tyler shook his head. “Unless you’re really sure you want Hunter for good, let it go. Don’t jerk his heart around anymore.”
“I love him.”
“But can you live with him? The way he is?” Torment whipped across Tyler’s face, and he blew out a tense breath. “Don’t start this if you’re not sure. Alyssa did that to me before she married Luc. She cared, but . . . she didn’t want what I wanted. Once, she tried.” He shook his head with a curse. “We didn’t make it far before she called it off. It fucking crushed me. I’m not it for her; I get it, but I wish she hadn’t tried me on for size. It would have been easier if she’d just walked away.”
Kata’s heart stuttered. Was she ready to be with Hunter in every way he needed? Last night, he hadn’t enslaved her. She’d felt strong, connected. So empowered that she’d let go. But was she ready to be with him that way for a lifetime?
“If you have to think about it that long, then you’re not sure.”
She tried to swallow down a rush of denial, but it bubbled back up. “He won’t be home for months, and by then he may have moved on.”
“If he isn’t for you, then you’ll have moved on, too. Problem solved.”
At the moment, with her lips still swollen from Hunter’s kisses and his scent still clinging to her, Kata didn’t believe that, for her, Hunter would ever be solved.
AFTER forcing down some of the extra-crispy toast and too-tart juice, Kata rode in silence with Tyler back to the Colonel’s house. Logan greeted her in jeans and a white tank clinging to a body slabbed with muscle that obviously got a lot of exercise. He sent her a cold glare but let her in, locking up tight behind her.
“Your mother is upstairs. She wants to talk to you.” He turned away.
Kata grabbed his arm. “Did Hunter come by here before he left?”
“Yes.” Logan stood almost frozen—except for the living fury on his face. “He signed your papers, despite the fact it killed him. If you ever fuck him over again, I swear I won’t be responsible for what I do to you.”
With that growled warning, he turned and marched to the back of the house, slamming cabinets in the kitchen as he went. Kata flinched, then pressed a trembling hand to her mouth. She’d really, truly hurt Hunter. She’d been so wrapped up in her own fears that she hadn’t really seen the depth of his pain. God, that realization hammered guilt through her. What the hell had she done?
“Kata?” her mother called down the stairs.
With a sigh, she rubbed her hands down her jeans, then ascended two steps at a time. If Mamá wanted to talk to her this early in the morning, something was up. Maybe hearing her mother’s problems would take her mind off her own. “Yeah, coming.”
At the top of the landing, she glanced into the airy bedroom the Colonel had settled her mother into, right beside his own. She rocked in an antique wooden chair, a thoughtful smile on her face. That peaceful look wasn’t her mother at all.
“Morning,” Kata greeted, testing the waters.