Sweet Fall
Page 63
Breaking from my mouth on a gasp, Austin panted hard and met my eyes with his dusky stare. I could see he was making sure I was okay, and seeing that I was, he sat back on his haunches and ripped his shirt over his head, his bare, colorfully tattooed torso on show for me to devour.
Lifting my hand, I ran my fingers, down the feathered wings of the dove on his throat, down his sternum, down the large Italian cross on his chest, and over the intricate scripts of calligraphic writings over his tight-packed abs and lower stomach. His olive skin was bronzed, the contours of his toned physique highlighted by the burning orange of the flames—gorgeous.
“Pix, you’re kinda killing me right now,” Austin said in a broken and graveled voice as my index finger slipped along the waistband of his jeans, his stomach tensing and contracting in response.
Austin’s eyes lazily grazed over my body, but this time I didn’t feel shame like I thought I would. Instead, I moved my hand to the button on the top of his zipper and threaded it through the hole, snapping it undone.
Austin’s head fell back on a hiss as my finger brushed against his hard tip and, falling forward, he smashed his lips against mine once more, using his thick thigh to pry my legs apart, lying in between, and commenced to rock against me… there.
“Austin…” I moaned loudly, and my back arched off the floor.
“Fuck, Pix,” Austin said through gritted teeth. “I need to be in you… need to feel you…”
Then Austin’s words really hit home, and I felt as though a huge bucket of iced water was injected into my veins.
Austin immediately noticed the change in my mood and, lifting himself on his arms, glanced down at me in trepidation.
“Pix? You okay?” He was still out of breath, a flushed erotic tinge to his beautiful Latin skin.
Skirting lower down my body and stroking the back of his hand down my face, he whispered, “Tell me what’s wrong. Talk to me, Pix. You’re f**kin’ unnerving me.”
Unable to face him, I focused on the comforting fleur-de-lys on his neck and awkwardly admitted, “I’m real concerned I’ll react badly to your touch.”
Austin sighed and closed his eyes, and I felt a huge dose of embarrassment prickle over my skin. But he surprised me when he cupped my face and forced me to look at him… to really look at him.
“Pix, I know you’ve never done this before. I know I was your first kiss… your first anything with a guy. And f**k, I know I ain’t worthy of any of it.”
Austin ran his thumb up and down my cheek, and as always, with a gentleness you wouldn’t expect from such a huge guy, he whispered, “But if you’re wanting to be with me… really be with me, like I wanna be with you, I’m not gonna do jack shit to hurt you. I’m not gonna touch you where you don’t wanna be touched. I’m not gonna make you take off your clothes if it’s something you can’t do with me yet.” Austin pressed his forehead against mine and promised, “If you’re not ready to sleep with me, or do anything at all, I’m not gonna be offended. You just gotta tell me where you’re at right now, ’cause if this isn’t going nowhere, I’m gonna have to stop… It’s kinda painful for me at the minute…” He dropped his head to the crook of my neck. I could feel him panting aggressively with the strain.
As I ran my hands up and down his back, I tried to push aside my insecurities. I wanted this so badly. I wanted to be with Austin so badly. For tonight, I wanted to not be Lexington Hart, freak and anorexic. I wanted to be brave. I wanted to be the girl who was falling hopelessly in love with this boy who knew my biggest secret… this boy who could be arguably as broken as me… this boy who claimed he needed me as much as I needed him. I wanted to be normal. I wanted to be loved for just plain ol’ normal me.
“Austin,” I whispered, staring at the reflected flames dancing on the wooden ceiling. He nodded his head against my neck to let me know he was listening, and I ran my hand through his hair. “Make love to me.”
Austin’s muscles tensed.
“Lexi…” He trailed off.
As I gripped his hair, I pushed, “Austin, make love to me. Just… be gentle… There’s a chance I might break…”
Soft lips began drifting up my neck, and I felt the touch all the way to my bones. As Austin reached my cheek, I ran my hands down to his back and held on to his bare shoulder blades.
“Are you sure?” Austin whispered as he passed my ear. I nodded, unable to speak through the intensity of the moment, and I heard his long sigh of release.
Austin’s head rose and he looked into my eyes. All I saw was adoration—complete and unconditional adoration. “You tell me if I do anything wrong, okay? We’ll do this however you need.”
Taking a deep breath, I whispered, “Please don’t touch my back. I can’t let you touch my back. It’s still a no-go for me.”
Austin tipped his head and brushed a kiss to my neck, combing my hair back from my face. “I wouldn’t have done that to you anyway. I remember everything you’ve ever said.”
My eyes closed as Austin’s hand drifted around the outside of my breast, and my feet curled at the foreign sensation sweeping between my legs. “And I can’t take off my dress either… Please just… try and work around it… I’m not ready to bare myself completely to you yet.”
Austin began to shift off me. “Lexi, if you don’t—”
Lifting my hand, I ran my fingers, down the feathered wings of the dove on his throat, down his sternum, down the large Italian cross on his chest, and over the intricate scripts of calligraphic writings over his tight-packed abs and lower stomach. His olive skin was bronzed, the contours of his toned physique highlighted by the burning orange of the flames—gorgeous.
“Pix, you’re kinda killing me right now,” Austin said in a broken and graveled voice as my index finger slipped along the waistband of his jeans, his stomach tensing and contracting in response.
Austin’s eyes lazily grazed over my body, but this time I didn’t feel shame like I thought I would. Instead, I moved my hand to the button on the top of his zipper and threaded it through the hole, snapping it undone.
Austin’s head fell back on a hiss as my finger brushed against his hard tip and, falling forward, he smashed his lips against mine once more, using his thick thigh to pry my legs apart, lying in between, and commenced to rock against me… there.
“Austin…” I moaned loudly, and my back arched off the floor.
“Fuck, Pix,” Austin said through gritted teeth. “I need to be in you… need to feel you…”
Then Austin’s words really hit home, and I felt as though a huge bucket of iced water was injected into my veins.
Austin immediately noticed the change in my mood and, lifting himself on his arms, glanced down at me in trepidation.
“Pix? You okay?” He was still out of breath, a flushed erotic tinge to his beautiful Latin skin.
Skirting lower down my body and stroking the back of his hand down my face, he whispered, “Tell me what’s wrong. Talk to me, Pix. You’re f**kin’ unnerving me.”
Unable to face him, I focused on the comforting fleur-de-lys on his neck and awkwardly admitted, “I’m real concerned I’ll react badly to your touch.”
Austin sighed and closed his eyes, and I felt a huge dose of embarrassment prickle over my skin. But he surprised me when he cupped my face and forced me to look at him… to really look at him.
“Pix, I know you’ve never done this before. I know I was your first kiss… your first anything with a guy. And f**k, I know I ain’t worthy of any of it.”
Austin ran his thumb up and down my cheek, and as always, with a gentleness you wouldn’t expect from such a huge guy, he whispered, “But if you’re wanting to be with me… really be with me, like I wanna be with you, I’m not gonna do jack shit to hurt you. I’m not gonna touch you where you don’t wanna be touched. I’m not gonna make you take off your clothes if it’s something you can’t do with me yet.” Austin pressed his forehead against mine and promised, “If you’re not ready to sleep with me, or do anything at all, I’m not gonna be offended. You just gotta tell me where you’re at right now, ’cause if this isn’t going nowhere, I’m gonna have to stop… It’s kinda painful for me at the minute…” He dropped his head to the crook of my neck. I could feel him panting aggressively with the strain.
As I ran my hands up and down his back, I tried to push aside my insecurities. I wanted this so badly. I wanted to be with Austin so badly. For tonight, I wanted to not be Lexington Hart, freak and anorexic. I wanted to be brave. I wanted to be the girl who was falling hopelessly in love with this boy who knew my biggest secret… this boy who could be arguably as broken as me… this boy who claimed he needed me as much as I needed him. I wanted to be normal. I wanted to be loved for just plain ol’ normal me.
“Austin,” I whispered, staring at the reflected flames dancing on the wooden ceiling. He nodded his head against my neck to let me know he was listening, and I ran my hand through his hair. “Make love to me.”
Austin’s muscles tensed.
“Lexi…” He trailed off.
As I gripped his hair, I pushed, “Austin, make love to me. Just… be gentle… There’s a chance I might break…”
Soft lips began drifting up my neck, and I felt the touch all the way to my bones. As Austin reached my cheek, I ran my hands down to his back and held on to his bare shoulder blades.
“Are you sure?” Austin whispered as he passed my ear. I nodded, unable to speak through the intensity of the moment, and I heard his long sigh of release.
Austin’s head rose and he looked into my eyes. All I saw was adoration—complete and unconditional adoration. “You tell me if I do anything wrong, okay? We’ll do this however you need.”
Taking a deep breath, I whispered, “Please don’t touch my back. I can’t let you touch my back. It’s still a no-go for me.”
Austin tipped his head and brushed a kiss to my neck, combing my hair back from my face. “I wouldn’t have done that to you anyway. I remember everything you’ve ever said.”
My eyes closed as Austin’s hand drifted around the outside of my breast, and my feet curled at the foreign sensation sweeping between my legs. “And I can’t take off my dress either… Please just… try and work around it… I’m not ready to bare myself completely to you yet.”
Austin began to shift off me. “Lexi, if you don’t—”
