Sweet Fall
Page 96
“You were cheated in this life, Mamma. You had a heart of gold and were awarded a life of coal. But you never complained. You just made the best of what little you had and just loved your boys with more love than anyone could ever dream possible. I know Bama was never your home, Mamma, and that you always wanted to be back here, back running among the cypress trees, singing center stage in the Teatro di Verona, and breaking bread with your family. But God had other plans for you. He knew you’d given too much too young and wanted you to take your place with Him in paradise. But in typical fashion, before you left, you made sure we would be okay, that I would be okay. You recognized my miracle when I was too blind to see it myself.”
I heard a sniff beside me and glanced down to see my gorgeous fiancée, her heart breaking but still giving a huge, encouraging smile.
Christ, I loved her.
Tipping my head to the vast blue, cloudless sky, I imagined Mamma looking down on us, at peace now that the Carillo boys were doing good, that Lexi was by my side. We were all out of trouble, getting things done right.
“Every day I live, I will strive to make you proud. You may’ve been on your own, no man to take care of you, but you taught me what it was to be strong, what it was to be a man. I will love Pix with all that I am, and one day, if we have kids, I will love them as much as you loved us.”
This time, the tears couldn’t be held back, and salty water began streaming from my eyes and down my cheeks. “Sleep tight, Mamma. I hope you’re singing up there with a smile upon your face.”
Letting out a sob, Levi curled himself into my chest and shook with the intensity of his grief.
Lexi took the urn from my hands so I could wrap my brother in my arms. “Shh, Lev. It’s okay.”
Levi’s hand gripped onto the back of my shirt as he rid himself of a year’s worth of sorrow. “I miss her, Austin. I miss her so damn much. I can’t do this.”
“I know, Lev. I know.”
I let him get it all out and looked across at Lexi, who was struggling with all the emotion herself. Holding out an arm, I waved her in, and she joined us, the three of us remembering one of the greatest women who ever lived.
When Levi calmed, I took him by the arms and looked him in the eye. “You gonna say something, kid? Mamma would’ve liked it if you did.”
Levi’s eyes darted to Lexi for support, and she squeezed his arm. “You can do it, sweetie. We’re here with you.”
Levi nodded and, taking the urn, stared down at it in sadness but managed to straighten his shoulders. I almost broke down at seeing him so strong.
“Austin?” Levi asked.
I laid one hand on his back and flicked my chin. “Yeah?”
“You think I can say a prayer instead? I’ve… I’ve got one I think she woulda liked.”
My chest tightened, and I felt Lexi take my hand and squeeze it in support.
“Sure you can, Lev. Mamma would’ve loved that.”
Levi moved right to the wall and balanced the urn on the ancient stone. He bowed his head, and I heard Lexi gasp as the locals listening in around us followed suit, paying their respects to a woman they never knew.
“L’eterno riposo, dona a loro, o Signore,
e splenda ad essi la luce perpetua,
possano le anime dei fedeli defunti,
Attraverso il ricordo di Dio, risposare in pace,
Amen.”
Levi spoke in perfect Italian, the prayer sounding like a song from his lips.
The locals’ wishes of Dio ti benedica, God bless, echoed around us, and Lexi leaned in close. “That was beautiful, but what did he say?”
Placing my mouth at her ear, I whispered,
“Eternal rest, grant unto them, O’ Lord,
And let perpetual light shine upon them.
May the souls of the faithful departed,
Through the memory of God, rest in peace,
Amen.”
“Oh, Austin. It’s beautiful,” Lexi said as she tucked her head into my chest and shed her own tears for the woman she knew so briefly but loved so much.
Placing a kiss on Levi’s head, I pressed my forehead to his and closed my eyes. No words needed to be said. He knew I was proud of him.
Taking the golden urn, I unscrewed the lid, and as a unit, we all moved to the edge of the wall to finally set her free.
Looking to Lexi, I said, “Ti amo tantissimo.”
She laid a kiss on my bare arm. “I love you too, baby.”
Glancing to Levi, I nodded my head, making sure he was ready. Mustering up some courage from deep within, my fifteen-year-old little brother nodded back in response. He was ready.
Another gust of wind drifted through the enclosed bridge, and I closed my eyes and sighed happily. I know you’re there, Mamma. I feel you with us.
Opening my eyes, I leaned forward and, on the count of three, let my mamma’s ashes fall into the river below.
As the urn emptied, I dropped it into the depths of the Arno and held my breath, watching as Chiara Carillo danced free in the breeze.
Exhaling softly, feeling the love of both Levi and Lexi beside me, I whispered, “Benvenuta a casa, Mamma. Benvenuta a casa.”
Welcome home, Mamma, welcome home.
Epilogue
Lexi
Honolulu, Hawaii
Two years later…
Dear Daisy,
Weight: N/A
Calories: N/A
Today is my wedding day.
Can you believe it?
Here in this tropical paradise, it’s my wedding day. And I wish more than anything that you could’ve been here, at my side, joining in the happiness.
I heard a sniff beside me and glanced down to see my gorgeous fiancée, her heart breaking but still giving a huge, encouraging smile.
Christ, I loved her.
Tipping my head to the vast blue, cloudless sky, I imagined Mamma looking down on us, at peace now that the Carillo boys were doing good, that Lexi was by my side. We were all out of trouble, getting things done right.
“Every day I live, I will strive to make you proud. You may’ve been on your own, no man to take care of you, but you taught me what it was to be strong, what it was to be a man. I will love Pix with all that I am, and one day, if we have kids, I will love them as much as you loved us.”
This time, the tears couldn’t be held back, and salty water began streaming from my eyes and down my cheeks. “Sleep tight, Mamma. I hope you’re singing up there with a smile upon your face.”
Letting out a sob, Levi curled himself into my chest and shook with the intensity of his grief.
Lexi took the urn from my hands so I could wrap my brother in my arms. “Shh, Lev. It’s okay.”
Levi’s hand gripped onto the back of my shirt as he rid himself of a year’s worth of sorrow. “I miss her, Austin. I miss her so damn much. I can’t do this.”
“I know, Lev. I know.”
I let him get it all out and looked across at Lexi, who was struggling with all the emotion herself. Holding out an arm, I waved her in, and she joined us, the three of us remembering one of the greatest women who ever lived.
When Levi calmed, I took him by the arms and looked him in the eye. “You gonna say something, kid? Mamma would’ve liked it if you did.”
Levi’s eyes darted to Lexi for support, and she squeezed his arm. “You can do it, sweetie. We’re here with you.”
Levi nodded and, taking the urn, stared down at it in sadness but managed to straighten his shoulders. I almost broke down at seeing him so strong.
“Austin?” Levi asked.
I laid one hand on his back and flicked my chin. “Yeah?”
“You think I can say a prayer instead? I’ve… I’ve got one I think she woulda liked.”
My chest tightened, and I felt Lexi take my hand and squeeze it in support.
“Sure you can, Lev. Mamma would’ve loved that.”
Levi moved right to the wall and balanced the urn on the ancient stone. He bowed his head, and I heard Lexi gasp as the locals listening in around us followed suit, paying their respects to a woman they never knew.
“L’eterno riposo, dona a loro, o Signore,
e splenda ad essi la luce perpetua,
possano le anime dei fedeli defunti,
Attraverso il ricordo di Dio, risposare in pace,
Amen.”
Levi spoke in perfect Italian, the prayer sounding like a song from his lips.
The locals’ wishes of Dio ti benedica, God bless, echoed around us, and Lexi leaned in close. “That was beautiful, but what did he say?”
Placing my mouth at her ear, I whispered,
“Eternal rest, grant unto them, O’ Lord,
And let perpetual light shine upon them.
May the souls of the faithful departed,
Through the memory of God, rest in peace,
Amen.”
“Oh, Austin. It’s beautiful,” Lexi said as she tucked her head into my chest and shed her own tears for the woman she knew so briefly but loved so much.
Placing a kiss on Levi’s head, I pressed my forehead to his and closed my eyes. No words needed to be said. He knew I was proud of him.
Taking the golden urn, I unscrewed the lid, and as a unit, we all moved to the edge of the wall to finally set her free.
Looking to Lexi, I said, “Ti amo tantissimo.”
She laid a kiss on my bare arm. “I love you too, baby.”
Glancing to Levi, I nodded my head, making sure he was ready. Mustering up some courage from deep within, my fifteen-year-old little brother nodded back in response. He was ready.
Another gust of wind drifted through the enclosed bridge, and I closed my eyes and sighed happily. I know you’re there, Mamma. I feel you with us.
Opening my eyes, I leaned forward and, on the count of three, let my mamma’s ashes fall into the river below.
As the urn emptied, I dropped it into the depths of the Arno and held my breath, watching as Chiara Carillo danced free in the breeze.
Exhaling softly, feeling the love of both Levi and Lexi beside me, I whispered, “Benvenuta a casa, Mamma. Benvenuta a casa.”
Welcome home, Mamma, welcome home.
Epilogue
Lexi
Honolulu, Hawaii
Two years later…
Dear Daisy,
Weight: N/A
Calories: N/A
Today is my wedding day.
Can you believe it?
Here in this tropical paradise, it’s my wedding day. And I wish more than anything that you could’ve been here, at my side, joining in the happiness.
