Sweet Little Memories
Page 2
Hilda was thirty. I was sixteen. Did she seriously think I believed this? How did I make her feel? Every time we were together, she was the one teaching me things.
“You married him. That’s all that matters now.”
We both remained silent for a while. I wondered if she’d fallen asleep naked in my bed. And if she had, I wondered how I was going to get her out of my room.
My father could never know about the time we’d spent together. Or tonight. I wasn’t scared of anything in this world. I’d always been fearless. I took things as they came. I dealt with whatever life threw me. Except when it came to my father. I had been scared of him for as long as I could remember.
One day, I’d stand up to him. One day, he wouldn’t control me. At least the beatings he doled out slowed down once I had grown a head taller than him. But he still beat me when he had the chance or felt lucky.
My affair with Hilda would likely get me killed. The man didn’t love me. I was his only son, and his heir. That was it. Nothing more.
“Okay, I’ll go. But we aren’t done. I’m not giving up on you. On us.”
I didn’t reply. I waited until the door close behind her to breathe again. I’d arrange to leave for boarding school sooner rather than later. Staying in this house was impossible.
Beulah
THE PHOTOS COULD HAVE BEEN Stone when he was a child. Without Jasper pointing it out, I would have seen the resemblance. Even with my heart screaming no, my head had acknowledged the truth. I knew only what Geraldine had told me about Stone’s father. What I did know wasn’t good. The lack of emotion Stone showed at the mention of his father was also confirmation that the man was evil.
But Stone had a son. A son that he allowed his father to raise.
“How old is he?” I asked as I heard Stone’s footsteps echoed up the stairs. He’d be here any moment. I’d see him. His face. And when I looked at him, I’d see the boy.
“Six or seven. I’m not sure. I never see him,” Jasper replied.
I scrutinized the last photo. It was the most recent from the pile Jasper had handed me. And I knew Stone was here now because I could feel him. He was focused on me. The current that was present whenever he was near me still prickled my skin.
“What does she have, Jasper?” His voice was hard. Cold. Threatening.
“Photos of Wills,” Jasper replied. The challenge was there.
I looked up at Stone questioningly, but he was turned to Jasper. Stone’s expression and body seemed to be pulsing with anger. The fury blazed brightly making it hard to inhale. Fear began to build slowly inside my chest, but I didn’t move. I wasn’t sure what I would do if the standoff between Jasper and Stone turned physical. How would I stop them?
“Why?” The one word was simple, but the animosity behind it made me tremble.
Jasper shifted nervously. He knew Stone better than anyone. Stone’s reaction was one that Jasper had to have expected. And still, he’d walked into this building and brought the photos to me.
“She needs to know. You made sure she knew about all the lies surrounding my family and hers. It was time she knew the lies that engulf you.”
Stone took a step toward him. His hands were balled tightly at his sides as the muscles in his forearms flexed in response. Veins stood out against his tan skin.
I was unable to breathe much less speak or move. It was as if I were watching this in a dream. A dream that left me without control of my body. I was a bystander watching it all unfold.
“This is it?” Stone’s voice held no emotion but the rage was there. Just underneath. “This is how you choose to end it?”
Jasper didn’t respond. There was silence. My eyes stayed on Stone. If he did lunge for Jasper, I wouldn’t be able to stop him. I watched him with my entire body on edge in case the thin hold on his anger snapped.
Stone took another step toward him. “You didn’t get what you wanted. And this was your answer.”
“It needed to end before she got hurt again.” Jasper sounded defensive.
Stone’s eyes narrowed, his jaw clenched and shifted as he inhaled sharply through his nose.
Jasper was handling this beyond poorly. Not that there could be a good outcome from his actions. But I should speak up. Maybe I could ask him about the boy. I needed to direct the attention to me, but I was frozen.
“I’m talking about the years of friendship. You were my family, Jasper. And this . . . this . . .” He pointed at the photos in my hand. “This is it? This is how you wanted to destroy us?”
Jasper wasn’t quick with a response. It didn’t matter because I couldn’t take my eyes off Stone. All I could see was the pain rising through his anger as Stone glared menacingly at Jasper.
“Were you going to tell her? No, you weren’t. You were going to hurt her the same way my mother did. She didn’t deserve that. This was me protecting her.”
“No, Jasper. This was you getting revenge like the spoiled child you still are,” Stone snarled with disgust. “Leave. Leave before I throw your sorry motherfucking ass out the nearest window.”
I didn’t expect Jasper to leave. My body was wound as tightly as it could get preparing for the first strike. But Jasper stepped back. He turned away from Stone, but stopped in the hallway in front of the stairs.
“She knows now. That’s what matters.” He’d lost his smug indignation.
“Leave!” Stone’s voice shook the windows.
I finally managed to tear my eyes off Stone to watch Jasper retreating. I still held the photos in my hand. As he stepped down to the top step, he glanced back at me. “You have my number.”
Stone turned and lunged at Jasper as I reached out and grabbed his arm to stop him.
“Don’t.” I managed to say something finally. “This isn’t about him.”
This wasn’t about Jasper. Stone felt betrayed. Although I should feel the same, my chest ached for him. Stone hadn’t been the one to tell me the Van Allan secrets. He’d been the one to correct the lies. Jasper’s actions were different. He’d chosen to hurt Stone. He’d sought to cause pain. Stone had no real family and he’d just lost trust in the only family he cared about.
When Stone turned to me he looked defeated. The fury was gone, replaced by sorrow. He looked hollow. I wanted to hold him. Reassure him. But the photos in my hand hadn’t disappeared. The truth behind what I held still dangled out there between us.
“You married him. That’s all that matters now.”
We both remained silent for a while. I wondered if she’d fallen asleep naked in my bed. And if she had, I wondered how I was going to get her out of my room.
My father could never know about the time we’d spent together. Or tonight. I wasn’t scared of anything in this world. I’d always been fearless. I took things as they came. I dealt with whatever life threw me. Except when it came to my father. I had been scared of him for as long as I could remember.
One day, I’d stand up to him. One day, he wouldn’t control me. At least the beatings he doled out slowed down once I had grown a head taller than him. But he still beat me when he had the chance or felt lucky.
My affair with Hilda would likely get me killed. The man didn’t love me. I was his only son, and his heir. That was it. Nothing more.
“Okay, I’ll go. But we aren’t done. I’m not giving up on you. On us.”
I didn’t reply. I waited until the door close behind her to breathe again. I’d arrange to leave for boarding school sooner rather than later. Staying in this house was impossible.
Beulah
THE PHOTOS COULD HAVE BEEN Stone when he was a child. Without Jasper pointing it out, I would have seen the resemblance. Even with my heart screaming no, my head had acknowledged the truth. I knew only what Geraldine had told me about Stone’s father. What I did know wasn’t good. The lack of emotion Stone showed at the mention of his father was also confirmation that the man was evil.
But Stone had a son. A son that he allowed his father to raise.
“How old is he?” I asked as I heard Stone’s footsteps echoed up the stairs. He’d be here any moment. I’d see him. His face. And when I looked at him, I’d see the boy.
“Six or seven. I’m not sure. I never see him,” Jasper replied.
I scrutinized the last photo. It was the most recent from the pile Jasper had handed me. And I knew Stone was here now because I could feel him. He was focused on me. The current that was present whenever he was near me still prickled my skin.
“What does she have, Jasper?” His voice was hard. Cold. Threatening.
“Photos of Wills,” Jasper replied. The challenge was there.
I looked up at Stone questioningly, but he was turned to Jasper. Stone’s expression and body seemed to be pulsing with anger. The fury blazed brightly making it hard to inhale. Fear began to build slowly inside my chest, but I didn’t move. I wasn’t sure what I would do if the standoff between Jasper and Stone turned physical. How would I stop them?
“Why?” The one word was simple, but the animosity behind it made me tremble.
Jasper shifted nervously. He knew Stone better than anyone. Stone’s reaction was one that Jasper had to have expected. And still, he’d walked into this building and brought the photos to me.
“She needs to know. You made sure she knew about all the lies surrounding my family and hers. It was time she knew the lies that engulf you.”
Stone took a step toward him. His hands were balled tightly at his sides as the muscles in his forearms flexed in response. Veins stood out against his tan skin.
I was unable to breathe much less speak or move. It was as if I were watching this in a dream. A dream that left me without control of my body. I was a bystander watching it all unfold.
“This is it?” Stone’s voice held no emotion but the rage was there. Just underneath. “This is how you choose to end it?”
Jasper didn’t respond. There was silence. My eyes stayed on Stone. If he did lunge for Jasper, I wouldn’t be able to stop him. I watched him with my entire body on edge in case the thin hold on his anger snapped.
Stone took another step toward him. “You didn’t get what you wanted. And this was your answer.”
“It needed to end before she got hurt again.” Jasper sounded defensive.
Stone’s eyes narrowed, his jaw clenched and shifted as he inhaled sharply through his nose.
Jasper was handling this beyond poorly. Not that there could be a good outcome from his actions. But I should speak up. Maybe I could ask him about the boy. I needed to direct the attention to me, but I was frozen.
“I’m talking about the years of friendship. You were my family, Jasper. And this . . . this . . .” He pointed at the photos in my hand. “This is it? This is how you wanted to destroy us?”
Jasper wasn’t quick with a response. It didn’t matter because I couldn’t take my eyes off Stone. All I could see was the pain rising through his anger as Stone glared menacingly at Jasper.
“Were you going to tell her? No, you weren’t. You were going to hurt her the same way my mother did. She didn’t deserve that. This was me protecting her.”
“No, Jasper. This was you getting revenge like the spoiled child you still are,” Stone snarled with disgust. “Leave. Leave before I throw your sorry motherfucking ass out the nearest window.”
I didn’t expect Jasper to leave. My body was wound as tightly as it could get preparing for the first strike. But Jasper stepped back. He turned away from Stone, but stopped in the hallway in front of the stairs.
“She knows now. That’s what matters.” He’d lost his smug indignation.
“Leave!” Stone’s voice shook the windows.
I finally managed to tear my eyes off Stone to watch Jasper retreating. I still held the photos in my hand. As he stepped down to the top step, he glanced back at me. “You have my number.”
Stone turned and lunged at Jasper as I reached out and grabbed his arm to stop him.
“Don’t.” I managed to say something finally. “This isn’t about him.”
This wasn’t about Jasper. Stone felt betrayed. Although I should feel the same, my chest ached for him. Stone hadn’t been the one to tell me the Van Allan secrets. He’d been the one to correct the lies. Jasper’s actions were different. He’d chosen to hurt Stone. He’d sought to cause pain. Stone had no real family and he’d just lost trust in the only family he cared about.
When Stone turned to me he looked defeated. The fury was gone, replaced by sorrow. He looked hollow. I wanted to hold him. Reassure him. But the photos in my hand hadn’t disappeared. The truth behind what I held still dangled out there between us.
