Sweet Little Thing
Page 30
We would be free to enjoy this. I’d found her and I wanted it all with her.
Beulah stirred in my arms and I watched as her eyes slowly blinked open. A sleepy smile spread across her face as she stretched and stared up at me. “So that wasn’t a dream,” she said in a voice thick from sleep.
“It was very real,” I assured her, bending to kiss her nose.
She turned closer and buried her head in my chest. “How can this work?”
“When you’re in love, you find a way. We can work it out together. Starting with my handling your worries about Heidi. I’m going to pay for her care, ten years in advance today.” Before I could say more, Beulah’s head shot up and she looked at me like I’d lost my mind.
“What? You can’t do that . . . that’s a fortune!”
“I’m sure they’ll give me a discount. Although I don’t care about the cost. I want Heidi taken care of regardless of what happens with us. I don’t intend to let you go, but if you ever want to walk away, I want you to have that freedom. I don’t want you staying with me because you are scared of losing your employment. I want you to want me. Because God knows I don’t want to think about life without you.”
Beulah sat up and pushed her hair back out of her face with both hands, then pulled her knees up to her chest and wrapped her arms around them. “Jasper, that’s not okay. I mean the idea of Heidi’s care and home being secure is . . . completely amazing. But it is a fairy tale. I don’t live in that world. And just because we,” she paused and looked at me. “We are doing this, and that’s my gamble to take. You shouldn’t have to pay me to have me in your life. That’s . . . well, it’s wrong. It’s unfair.”
Every girl before her had started expecting gifts. Expensive gifts, trips, and luxury from me the moment we got together. I wasn’t offering Beulah any of that. Just security for her sister. And this was her response. Would it always be like this? Would she make me love her more every day? I was going to be so damn wrapped up in her that I’d have to make sure she never left me. I had a taste of her and I wanted to hold on tight.
“Beulah, do you love me?” I asked her although she had already told me she did.
“Yes.”
“Then let me do this. Let me give Heidi security. To make us work, we need to make some changes. You not killing yourself with three jobs is one of those changes. I will take care of Heidi. You can work with me at the office and I’m going to get another housekeeper to work here. And before you say anything, let me finish. You are with me now. We are a couple. I don’t want to see you cleaning my house. I want to sit with you at night and watch movies, talk, make love. I want to watch you eat breakfast and enjoy you. If you’re waiting on me it’s going to kill me. I love you. Please give us a chance.”
She laid her forehead on her knees that were tucked up close to her chin and closed her eyes. I saw her sigh, and I waited. She needed a moment to process. I gave it to her.
My heart was pounding in my chest as the seconds ticked by. Beulah was independent. She was proud. She didn’t want to take any help from me. She wanted to work for what she got. She had a beautiful heart, but if we were going to make this work, we had to make some changes.
“The job I do at the office isn’t enough. I need to do more,” she said without looking up at me.
“I have another position I need filled. I want a private secretary. The one we have now isn’t exclusively mine. I’ve been hesitant to hire one because I needed someone I could put up with for long hours, and be able to work with one-on-one. You’d be the perfect answer to that. The position would come with a salary and benefits.”
I had already thought of this. I just hadn’t planned on laying it on her this soon. But it seemed like the right moment.
She finally lifted her head and sighed again. Her shoulders rising and falling in one heavy breath. “Okay. If that will help you. Then okay. I want us to work too. I just don’t want to be a leech. I need to make my own money. Help pay the bills and for food.”
There was no way on earth I was letting her pay the bills or for food, but we’d deal with that later. I didn’t want to argue all morning. “Good.”
“Most people don’t start a relationship living together,” she said frowning.
“Yes, but we were living in the same house before we started a relationship. Different rules.” I wasn’t about to let her get the idea she needed to move out.
She leaned over and rested her head on my shoulder. Nothing was said. I held her and we watched the early morning sun through the windows.
This was what I wanted and I finally had it.
Beulah
THE EASIEST THING I’D DONE today was quit my job at the club. I’d barely been an employee there. I felt guilty about that. However, they hadn’t seemed to care that I wasn’t coming back.
The hardest thing I’d done today was move my things upstairs. Jasper had given me the yellow guest bedroom across from his. He said I wouldn’t be sleeping in there but he wanted me to have my own space. He was trying to make our relationship easy on me.
Every time I had thought about Heidi and that she was going to be taken care of for the next ten years, the relief I felt almost brought me to tears. No more worrying if she was going to have to leave her safe home. The place she’d come to love. I would have loved Jasper even if I was still sleeping downstairs and working three jobs to pay for Heidi’s care, but his desire to take care of her made me love him even more.
I would be the best assistant in the world. I’d make it up to him, if that were even possible. If something happened between us, I would find a way to pay him back. I wasn’t going to tell him that now, but I would if that time came.
Believing in fairy tales wasn’t smart. I’d never lived one and trusting anyone was hard. It wasn’t smart, but he made me want to believe.
I stood in the yellow bedroom, looking at my limited wardrobe that didn’t even take up a tenth of the closet space. I could put a bed in that closet and still have room. Heidi would think that was the coolest thing she’d ever seen.
I could visit her more now. Both Saturday and Sunday. Yet another thing to love Jasper for. He’d gone to the office and told me to stay home to move my things where I wanted them. Tomorrow I’d start the new job. I had tried to argue until he said please. So, I agreed and stayed home. Now that I’d moved everything, I felt lost with nothing left to do.
We needed groceries. I would do that and dust. Then I could make dinner. That should keep me busy. Heading downstairs, I heard voices and I paused. I was supposed to be the only person here. Had Portia returned? I listened carefully as I made my way down the stairs. It was a guy and a girl. No, it was two guys.
“I’ll call Jasper and find out what the code to the pool house is,” one of the guys said. I relaxed a little realizing it was just Jasper’s friends.
I followed the voices and found them in the sunroom. I recognized Sterling and Tate. However, the girl I’d never seen. She was tall, slender, and gorgeous. Long, dark, almost black hair hung in loose curls down her back. Her high cheekbones and perfect nose gave her the look of wealth.
“There she is,” Sterling said smiling at me. “I was about to call Jasper. The pool house is locked and we are starving. Could you tell me the code and fix us lunch?” His smile was friendly.
Beulah stirred in my arms and I watched as her eyes slowly blinked open. A sleepy smile spread across her face as she stretched and stared up at me. “So that wasn’t a dream,” she said in a voice thick from sleep.
“It was very real,” I assured her, bending to kiss her nose.
She turned closer and buried her head in my chest. “How can this work?”
“When you’re in love, you find a way. We can work it out together. Starting with my handling your worries about Heidi. I’m going to pay for her care, ten years in advance today.” Before I could say more, Beulah’s head shot up and she looked at me like I’d lost my mind.
“What? You can’t do that . . . that’s a fortune!”
“I’m sure they’ll give me a discount. Although I don’t care about the cost. I want Heidi taken care of regardless of what happens with us. I don’t intend to let you go, but if you ever want to walk away, I want you to have that freedom. I don’t want you staying with me because you are scared of losing your employment. I want you to want me. Because God knows I don’t want to think about life without you.”
Beulah sat up and pushed her hair back out of her face with both hands, then pulled her knees up to her chest and wrapped her arms around them. “Jasper, that’s not okay. I mean the idea of Heidi’s care and home being secure is . . . completely amazing. But it is a fairy tale. I don’t live in that world. And just because we,” she paused and looked at me. “We are doing this, and that’s my gamble to take. You shouldn’t have to pay me to have me in your life. That’s . . . well, it’s wrong. It’s unfair.”
Every girl before her had started expecting gifts. Expensive gifts, trips, and luxury from me the moment we got together. I wasn’t offering Beulah any of that. Just security for her sister. And this was her response. Would it always be like this? Would she make me love her more every day? I was going to be so damn wrapped up in her that I’d have to make sure she never left me. I had a taste of her and I wanted to hold on tight.
“Beulah, do you love me?” I asked her although she had already told me she did.
“Yes.”
“Then let me do this. Let me give Heidi security. To make us work, we need to make some changes. You not killing yourself with three jobs is one of those changes. I will take care of Heidi. You can work with me at the office and I’m going to get another housekeeper to work here. And before you say anything, let me finish. You are with me now. We are a couple. I don’t want to see you cleaning my house. I want to sit with you at night and watch movies, talk, make love. I want to watch you eat breakfast and enjoy you. If you’re waiting on me it’s going to kill me. I love you. Please give us a chance.”
She laid her forehead on her knees that were tucked up close to her chin and closed her eyes. I saw her sigh, and I waited. She needed a moment to process. I gave it to her.
My heart was pounding in my chest as the seconds ticked by. Beulah was independent. She was proud. She didn’t want to take any help from me. She wanted to work for what she got. She had a beautiful heart, but if we were going to make this work, we had to make some changes.
“The job I do at the office isn’t enough. I need to do more,” she said without looking up at me.
“I have another position I need filled. I want a private secretary. The one we have now isn’t exclusively mine. I’ve been hesitant to hire one because I needed someone I could put up with for long hours, and be able to work with one-on-one. You’d be the perfect answer to that. The position would come with a salary and benefits.”
I had already thought of this. I just hadn’t planned on laying it on her this soon. But it seemed like the right moment.
She finally lifted her head and sighed again. Her shoulders rising and falling in one heavy breath. “Okay. If that will help you. Then okay. I want us to work too. I just don’t want to be a leech. I need to make my own money. Help pay the bills and for food.”
There was no way on earth I was letting her pay the bills or for food, but we’d deal with that later. I didn’t want to argue all morning. “Good.”
“Most people don’t start a relationship living together,” she said frowning.
“Yes, but we were living in the same house before we started a relationship. Different rules.” I wasn’t about to let her get the idea she needed to move out.
She leaned over and rested her head on my shoulder. Nothing was said. I held her and we watched the early morning sun through the windows.
This was what I wanted and I finally had it.
Beulah
THE EASIEST THING I’D DONE today was quit my job at the club. I’d barely been an employee there. I felt guilty about that. However, they hadn’t seemed to care that I wasn’t coming back.
The hardest thing I’d done today was move my things upstairs. Jasper had given me the yellow guest bedroom across from his. He said I wouldn’t be sleeping in there but he wanted me to have my own space. He was trying to make our relationship easy on me.
Every time I had thought about Heidi and that she was going to be taken care of for the next ten years, the relief I felt almost brought me to tears. No more worrying if she was going to have to leave her safe home. The place she’d come to love. I would have loved Jasper even if I was still sleeping downstairs and working three jobs to pay for Heidi’s care, but his desire to take care of her made me love him even more.
I would be the best assistant in the world. I’d make it up to him, if that were even possible. If something happened between us, I would find a way to pay him back. I wasn’t going to tell him that now, but I would if that time came.
Believing in fairy tales wasn’t smart. I’d never lived one and trusting anyone was hard. It wasn’t smart, but he made me want to believe.
I stood in the yellow bedroom, looking at my limited wardrobe that didn’t even take up a tenth of the closet space. I could put a bed in that closet and still have room. Heidi would think that was the coolest thing she’d ever seen.
I could visit her more now. Both Saturday and Sunday. Yet another thing to love Jasper for. He’d gone to the office and told me to stay home to move my things where I wanted them. Tomorrow I’d start the new job. I had tried to argue until he said please. So, I agreed and stayed home. Now that I’d moved everything, I felt lost with nothing left to do.
We needed groceries. I would do that and dust. Then I could make dinner. That should keep me busy. Heading downstairs, I heard voices and I paused. I was supposed to be the only person here. Had Portia returned? I listened carefully as I made my way down the stairs. It was a guy and a girl. No, it was two guys.
“I’ll call Jasper and find out what the code to the pool house is,” one of the guys said. I relaxed a little realizing it was just Jasper’s friends.
I followed the voices and found them in the sunroom. I recognized Sterling and Tate. However, the girl I’d never seen. She was tall, slender, and gorgeous. Long, dark, almost black hair hung in loose curls down her back. Her high cheekbones and perfect nose gave her the look of wealth.
“There she is,” Sterling said smiling at me. “I was about to call Jasper. The pool house is locked and we are starving. Could you tell me the code and fix us lunch?” His smile was friendly.
