Tank
Page 54
“We have to be on g-guard against this kind of thing now.” The words are hard to get out. But I need to tell Finn. I need to warn him. “Women will want to get close to us just because we have money.”
He doesn’t look impressed. “There are women who want to get close to you because you ride a motorcycle. There’s no way you can know a woman’s motivations but you can judge her actions.”
“Her actions…” Suddenly the entire situation is insanely funny to me. I chuckle to myself while Finn just shakes his head. When I finally get my amusement under control, I point at him.
“Her actions are … that … she accepted money to be with me,” I finish triumphantly.
“Actually, she was offered money and didn’t immediately take it. I didn’t hesitate when he offered me money so she’s got more willpower than I’ve got. You still want to be my brother?”
“That sounds like a trick question.” Gabe collapses on the couch next to me.
“Whose side are you on?” From this angle I can finally look at him up close and he really does look like me. Like a more handsome version of me.
I wonder if Emma would think he was handsome. He looks more like the kind of guy that she should be with. Clean cut and educated. Not spiked hair, leather and a body full of scars and battle wounds. Maybe my father will pay her to seduce him, too. She’s already got Finn wrapped around her little finger.
And me. She’s already got me … something.
Gabe seems amused by my staring. “I’m just saying maybe you aren’t the only person our dear father manipulated?”
I have the feeling that what he’s saying makes sense but I’m so tired. All I want to do is be alone with my anger and my despair. I point at Gabe. “You should get out.” Then I point at Finn. “You should get out, too.”
“I’m not getting out. This is my place, asshole.”
Zack looks over from his perch near the window. “What about me? Should I stay?” He smirks and takes another sip of his beer.
Now they’re all staring at me. And laughing at me, too. “I’m too drunk for this.”
Then I promptly pass out.
The next morning, I open my eyes slowly, tentatively. The splitting pain behind my forehead seems to be a warning of what’s to come. It’s too bright in here and my back hurts. When I turn my head, it feels like my brain is being assaulted by a hundred tiny men with hammers.
“What happened?”
Finn appears in the doorway of the living room. He’s already dressed in jeans and a green sweater. “You got shitfaced. That’s what happened.”
Gabe comes out of the kitchen. “It’s alive!”
I grimace as his loud voice brings back the small army of cavemen in my head. “Is it? Because IT feels like roadkill.”
Gabe disappears back into the kitchen and then reemerges with a cup of coffee. “Drink this.”
The smell coming from the cup is like nirvana. I nurse the coffee while they both watch me. Finally I can’t take it anymore. “What?”
“Do you even remember last night?” Finn demands.
“More than I’d like to.”
I remember all of Finn’s arguments actually and in the light of day they make sense. None of us could say no to the money our father offered. So, was Emma any better or worse than we were? The old man actually seems kind of fond of her. I wonder if he thought he was playing matchmaker in a twisted way.
It would be just the kind of screwed up thing that he would think was normal.
The doorbell rings and Finn answers it. “Mom! What are you doing here?”
I immediately sit up straighter and try to look alive. Even though I’m a grown man, I still don’t want my mom to catch me hungover. Mom nods hello to Gabe and Zack as she hangs her coat on the back of one of the bar stools. She met them a few days ago and it wasn’t nearly as awkward as we all thought it would be.
“I’ve been thinking, boys.”
Mom sits down on the couch next to me. I blink several times, hoping I don’t smell like alcohol.
“After everything that happened, well, I shouldn’t be but I was worried about your father. But when I called the hospital to check on him, they wouldn’t tell me anything. So, I decided to come over. Are you all getting ready to go visit him?”
Finn glances at me. “We’re trying to convince Tank not to let the best thing that ever happened to him walk away because of something our dad started. He still hasn’t called Emma.”
I scowl at Finn. He was always a tattletale. “I’m not letting her walk away. She walked away on her own. Now I’m just thinking about everything. And she hasn’t called me either.” I glance over at my mom. She’s been strangely quiet on the whole subject. “This whole week, you haven’t said much about Emma. That’s not like you.”
“I don’t want to influence you. It’s your decision. But I do want to ask you a question.”
I don’t trust this casual inquiry at all. My mom knows how to get all up in my head and make me face things when I’m being an idiot without ever raising her voice or being pushy.
“Do I have a choice?”
She ignores my smart response. “Why didn’t you tell me about your dad being in town when you first found out?”
Now I really am an idiot. I should have known that Finn and I weren’t off the hook for that. Even though we had good reason, my mom is definitely going to require a good explanation for why we’d lie to her face.
He doesn’t look impressed. “There are women who want to get close to you because you ride a motorcycle. There’s no way you can know a woman’s motivations but you can judge her actions.”
“Her actions…” Suddenly the entire situation is insanely funny to me. I chuckle to myself while Finn just shakes his head. When I finally get my amusement under control, I point at him.
“Her actions are … that … she accepted money to be with me,” I finish triumphantly.
“Actually, she was offered money and didn’t immediately take it. I didn’t hesitate when he offered me money so she’s got more willpower than I’ve got. You still want to be my brother?”
“That sounds like a trick question.” Gabe collapses on the couch next to me.
“Whose side are you on?” From this angle I can finally look at him up close and he really does look like me. Like a more handsome version of me.
I wonder if Emma would think he was handsome. He looks more like the kind of guy that she should be with. Clean cut and educated. Not spiked hair, leather and a body full of scars and battle wounds. Maybe my father will pay her to seduce him, too. She’s already got Finn wrapped around her little finger.
And me. She’s already got me … something.
Gabe seems amused by my staring. “I’m just saying maybe you aren’t the only person our dear father manipulated?”
I have the feeling that what he’s saying makes sense but I’m so tired. All I want to do is be alone with my anger and my despair. I point at Gabe. “You should get out.” Then I point at Finn. “You should get out, too.”
“I’m not getting out. This is my place, asshole.”
Zack looks over from his perch near the window. “What about me? Should I stay?” He smirks and takes another sip of his beer.
Now they’re all staring at me. And laughing at me, too. “I’m too drunk for this.”
Then I promptly pass out.
The next morning, I open my eyes slowly, tentatively. The splitting pain behind my forehead seems to be a warning of what’s to come. It’s too bright in here and my back hurts. When I turn my head, it feels like my brain is being assaulted by a hundred tiny men with hammers.
“What happened?”
Finn appears in the doorway of the living room. He’s already dressed in jeans and a green sweater. “You got shitfaced. That’s what happened.”
Gabe comes out of the kitchen. “It’s alive!”
I grimace as his loud voice brings back the small army of cavemen in my head. “Is it? Because IT feels like roadkill.”
Gabe disappears back into the kitchen and then reemerges with a cup of coffee. “Drink this.”
The smell coming from the cup is like nirvana. I nurse the coffee while they both watch me. Finally I can’t take it anymore. “What?”
“Do you even remember last night?” Finn demands.
“More than I’d like to.”
I remember all of Finn’s arguments actually and in the light of day they make sense. None of us could say no to the money our father offered. So, was Emma any better or worse than we were? The old man actually seems kind of fond of her. I wonder if he thought he was playing matchmaker in a twisted way.
It would be just the kind of screwed up thing that he would think was normal.
The doorbell rings and Finn answers it. “Mom! What are you doing here?”
I immediately sit up straighter and try to look alive. Even though I’m a grown man, I still don’t want my mom to catch me hungover. Mom nods hello to Gabe and Zack as she hangs her coat on the back of one of the bar stools. She met them a few days ago and it wasn’t nearly as awkward as we all thought it would be.
“I’ve been thinking, boys.”
Mom sits down on the couch next to me. I blink several times, hoping I don’t smell like alcohol.
“After everything that happened, well, I shouldn’t be but I was worried about your father. But when I called the hospital to check on him, they wouldn’t tell me anything. So, I decided to come over. Are you all getting ready to go visit him?”
Finn glances at me. “We’re trying to convince Tank not to let the best thing that ever happened to him walk away because of something our dad started. He still hasn’t called Emma.”
I scowl at Finn. He was always a tattletale. “I’m not letting her walk away. She walked away on her own. Now I’m just thinking about everything. And she hasn’t called me either.” I glance over at my mom. She’s been strangely quiet on the whole subject. “This whole week, you haven’t said much about Emma. That’s not like you.”
“I don’t want to influence you. It’s your decision. But I do want to ask you a question.”
I don’t trust this casual inquiry at all. My mom knows how to get all up in my head and make me face things when I’m being an idiot without ever raising her voice or being pushy.
“Do I have a choice?”
She ignores my smart response. “Why didn’t you tell me about your dad being in town when you first found out?”
Now I really am an idiot. I should have known that Finn and I weren’t off the hook for that. Even though we had good reason, my mom is definitely going to require a good explanation for why we’d lie to her face.
