The Acceptance
Page 23
“Mother, my only struggle is trying to keep my calm right now. Tomorrow it will be dealing with the fact that Fitz won’t be emailing me. The day after that it will be knowing he’s not coming back—ever. And the next day will be the same. And the day after that. The difference will be I’ll still be blind. You can’t protect me from that. And if—if—I choose to have an adult relationship with Tyler then I will. But that has nothing to do with you.”
“Come home with me,” her mother pleaded.
“No. I live here. I have lived here for a year.” She held her arms out until her mother took her hands and she pulled her in to hug her. “Mother, he’s gone. We have to wake up tomorrow and keep living. We can’t spend the rest of our lives blaming each other.”
Her mother sobbed in her ear. “What will we do?”
“Live, Mother. He’d be very disappointed in us if we stopped living to mourn him.”
“You’re right.” Her mother stepped back. “I’m sorry we said horrible things to each other.”
Courtney was sure that was to even the playing field, though Courtney didn’t regret anything she’d said.
“Go home, Mother. Take a long bath and rest.”
“I will.” She kissed Courtney on the cheek. “We can finish his room later.”
Finally she was making sense.
Courtney listened as her mother walk down the steps and shut the front door. She felt the pain of the day drag through her and she sat in the floor and cried. She missed Fitz so much. She could convince her mother to go on and try to be the voice of reason, but in truth would she ever accept the fate they’d all been handed?
Chapter Thirteen
Tyler had been thinking all day, since he left his aunt’s office. He wanted to celebrate and cook dinner for Courtney. After all, one of his jobs had been as a sous-chef at a family restaurant for a few months. He could pull something together.
He’d arranged to meet with his cousin tomorrow at lunch and they could begin melding ideas for the gala his aunt would put on to raise money for her organization.
He was honored that Simone took him into consideration. He felt right about helping others. Tyler smiled as he pushed his cart through the grocery store. There was something in the way that Courtney carried herself, the way she thought, just the way she lived that made Tyler want to be more like her. She had an acceptance about things that had had him driving over to his sister’s house first thing the other night to apologize. And wasn’t he glad he had. On Sunday he’d go back again, this time as an expected guest, though he’d believed that there had always been an extra seat there just in case he was to drop in. This time, however, he’d take Courtney with him.
The thought made him warm. He’d only known her a few days, but the woman had changed his life already. Just the vision she had, without physically seeing the world, made him see it more clearly.
Yes, she might have just made him accept everything that he thought was wrong with his life. Thank God, Courtney thought he smelled good enough to drop her scarf.
Tyler called her around one o’clock and invited her to dinner. He wasn’t sure her voice was very uplifting, but she’d accepted his invitation and that, he thought, had made her sound a little happier.
As he disconnected the phone call he thought about her. Six o’clock just wasn’t going to get here fast enough. He wanted to see her. Be with her. Oh, and the urge to kiss her was weighing big time on his mind.
He put away his groceries and looked up a recipe for something with chicken on the computer. If he’d done that first he wouldn’t just be putting in available ingredients in the search box. Maybe Clara or Avery knew a thing or two about cooking. It would be nice if he didn’t have to think so hard each time he wanted to cook a meal for Courtney.
Tyler sat back in his chair and just looked at the computer screen. He did want to cook for Courtney. He realized, that even in the few brief times they’d spent together he’d grown closer to her than he had anyone in years.
He smiled to himself. His mother and father were only together about a year before they married. Avery’s parents had her before they got married. Clara ran off and married Warner in Vegas. Even Ed and Darcy fell in love right after meeting. Could that be what he was feeling? Were the feelings he was having for Courtney deeper than just this acceptance she made him feel?
Really, did it matter? He liked her. He liked her a lot. As long as they got along and wanted to be with each other they could see where things went between them.
He let out a deep breath. There was something inside of him that made him think there just might be something between them.
At six o’clock Tyler rang the bell at Courtney’s door. He stood there and wondered if she was even home. He was just about to ring it again when she opened the door.
“I was afraid you weren’t home.”
She smiled easily at his voice. “I guess I fell asleep. I was a little tired after staying up all night and then putting up with my mother today.”
“Is everything okay?”
“Do you have wine at your house?”
“Yes.”
“Let’s talk about it over wine.” She smiled sweetly. “Let me get my purse.”
Courtney stepped back into the house and a moment later came to the door with her purse on her shoulder. She shut the door, locked it, and then held out her hand to reach for his arm.
Tyler moved next to her, but she stopped from taking his arm and instead rested her hand on his shoulder and turned him toward her.
Her other hand came up to his face and her thumb grazed over his lip. “You shaved.”
“I did. The grizzly look is not good on me.”
“I’ll bet you’re just as handsome either way.”
“Thank you.”
Courtney stepped in closer to him. “Would you mind if I test it out?”
“It?”
She laughed as she pulled his face closer to hers. “Your smooth cheek.” She rested her cheek against his and his eyes drifted closed in anticipation. “Very nice.”
Courtney’s other hand came to his other cheek and she guided his lips to hers where she pressed a warm kiss to them. But she didn’t back away. She stepped in until his only choice was to wrap his arms around her and hold her as much for balance as need to be near her.
Courtney opened her mouth to him and he took it. Her hands slid around his neck, entangled in his hair, and sent pulses of energy through his body.
“Come home with me,” her mother pleaded.
“No. I live here. I have lived here for a year.” She held her arms out until her mother took her hands and she pulled her in to hug her. “Mother, he’s gone. We have to wake up tomorrow and keep living. We can’t spend the rest of our lives blaming each other.”
Her mother sobbed in her ear. “What will we do?”
“Live, Mother. He’d be very disappointed in us if we stopped living to mourn him.”
“You’re right.” Her mother stepped back. “I’m sorry we said horrible things to each other.”
Courtney was sure that was to even the playing field, though Courtney didn’t regret anything she’d said.
“Go home, Mother. Take a long bath and rest.”
“I will.” She kissed Courtney on the cheek. “We can finish his room later.”
Finally she was making sense.
Courtney listened as her mother walk down the steps and shut the front door. She felt the pain of the day drag through her and she sat in the floor and cried. She missed Fitz so much. She could convince her mother to go on and try to be the voice of reason, but in truth would she ever accept the fate they’d all been handed?
Chapter Thirteen
Tyler had been thinking all day, since he left his aunt’s office. He wanted to celebrate and cook dinner for Courtney. After all, one of his jobs had been as a sous-chef at a family restaurant for a few months. He could pull something together.
He’d arranged to meet with his cousin tomorrow at lunch and they could begin melding ideas for the gala his aunt would put on to raise money for her organization.
He was honored that Simone took him into consideration. He felt right about helping others. Tyler smiled as he pushed his cart through the grocery store. There was something in the way that Courtney carried herself, the way she thought, just the way she lived that made Tyler want to be more like her. She had an acceptance about things that had had him driving over to his sister’s house first thing the other night to apologize. And wasn’t he glad he had. On Sunday he’d go back again, this time as an expected guest, though he’d believed that there had always been an extra seat there just in case he was to drop in. This time, however, he’d take Courtney with him.
The thought made him warm. He’d only known her a few days, but the woman had changed his life already. Just the vision she had, without physically seeing the world, made him see it more clearly.
Yes, she might have just made him accept everything that he thought was wrong with his life. Thank God, Courtney thought he smelled good enough to drop her scarf.
Tyler called her around one o’clock and invited her to dinner. He wasn’t sure her voice was very uplifting, but she’d accepted his invitation and that, he thought, had made her sound a little happier.
As he disconnected the phone call he thought about her. Six o’clock just wasn’t going to get here fast enough. He wanted to see her. Be with her. Oh, and the urge to kiss her was weighing big time on his mind.
He put away his groceries and looked up a recipe for something with chicken on the computer. If he’d done that first he wouldn’t just be putting in available ingredients in the search box. Maybe Clara or Avery knew a thing or two about cooking. It would be nice if he didn’t have to think so hard each time he wanted to cook a meal for Courtney.
Tyler sat back in his chair and just looked at the computer screen. He did want to cook for Courtney. He realized, that even in the few brief times they’d spent together he’d grown closer to her than he had anyone in years.
He smiled to himself. His mother and father were only together about a year before they married. Avery’s parents had her before they got married. Clara ran off and married Warner in Vegas. Even Ed and Darcy fell in love right after meeting. Could that be what he was feeling? Were the feelings he was having for Courtney deeper than just this acceptance she made him feel?
Really, did it matter? He liked her. He liked her a lot. As long as they got along and wanted to be with each other they could see where things went between them.
He let out a deep breath. There was something inside of him that made him think there just might be something between them.
At six o’clock Tyler rang the bell at Courtney’s door. He stood there and wondered if she was even home. He was just about to ring it again when she opened the door.
“I was afraid you weren’t home.”
She smiled easily at his voice. “I guess I fell asleep. I was a little tired after staying up all night and then putting up with my mother today.”
“Is everything okay?”
“Do you have wine at your house?”
“Yes.”
“Let’s talk about it over wine.” She smiled sweetly. “Let me get my purse.”
Courtney stepped back into the house and a moment later came to the door with her purse on her shoulder. She shut the door, locked it, and then held out her hand to reach for his arm.
Tyler moved next to her, but she stopped from taking his arm and instead rested her hand on his shoulder and turned him toward her.
Her other hand came up to his face and her thumb grazed over his lip. “You shaved.”
“I did. The grizzly look is not good on me.”
“I’ll bet you’re just as handsome either way.”
“Thank you.”
Courtney stepped in closer to him. “Would you mind if I test it out?”
“It?”
She laughed as she pulled his face closer to hers. “Your smooth cheek.” She rested her cheek against his and his eyes drifted closed in anticipation. “Very nice.”
Courtney’s other hand came to his other cheek and she guided his lips to hers where she pressed a warm kiss to them. But she didn’t back away. She stepped in until his only choice was to wrap his arms around her and hold her as much for balance as need to be near her.
Courtney opened her mouth to him and he took it. Her hands slid around his neck, entangled in his hair, and sent pulses of energy through his body.
