The Christmas Surprise
Page 70
‘She was doing her job,’ said Rosie. ‘Probably pretty well.’
‘Well go and call her, tell her to get up out of her sickbed and take our baby away,’ said Stephen, and Rosie silently fumed at him.)
Rosie stared so long at Hester that even Hester’s normally redoubtable self-confidence seemed to shrink a little, and she paid for her sweets and left, leaving Rosie furious and shaking and absolutely not in the mood for her next customer of the morning, as she heard spiky heels clopping up the street and looked with weariness at the skin-tight jeans and the tiny cropped furry coat and the huge pair of sunglasses even though there was no sun in the sky today and no prospect of any for quite some time.
‘Pamela.’
The door tinging was less of a welcoming ring and more of a clanging doom chime.
‘My brother is a prick,’ said Pamela, without bothering with any of the niceties. Old Mrs Brown, who was browsing for humbugs, scurried to one side.
‘Um, yes, sorry about yesterday, we had a lot going on,’ said Rosie. ‘Do you want to see Apostil?’
‘Yeah, great. Well done. Et cetera,’ said Pamela.
‘What are you up to?’ said Rosie politely. ‘Are your builders still in?’
‘Oh no, I told them if they weren’t clear by the weekend they’d not be getting paid. Triple shifts. You’ve got to be firm with these people.’
‘Okay,’ said Rosie.
‘No, I’m on my way to have it out with him once and for all,’ said Pamela.
‘Who?’ said Rosie.
‘Roy, of course.’
‘Uh, of course,’ said Rosie. She had rather thought that Roy snogging his ex-wife and getting back together with her in front of everyone in the entire town might have settled the matter pretty conclusively, but she wasn’t going to step in front of Pamela’s wrath.
‘Give me some chewing gum.’
‘We don’t stock it,’ said Rosie apologetically. ‘Lilian thinks it’s common.’
Pamela rolled her eyes.
‘How can it be when I want some?’
Rosie didn’t have an answer to that, so brought out the sugar-free mints instead.
‘What are you going to say to him?’
‘Apart from the fact that he’s a cock-sucking son of a bitch … sorry, Appy.’
Apostil beamed cheerfully. It slightly tickled Rosie that he seemed to love his aunt Pamela so completely. It was a combination of her making a lot of noise and wearing masses of sparkly, shiny things that attracted his attention, plus the fact that she didn’t coo or fuss over him. It reminded Rosie of those people who didn’t like cats, who would instantly have the nearest cat drape itself over them.
‘No, I just need to hear it from him. For closure, you know what I mean?’
Close up, Pamela didn’t look as tremendous as usual. Her skin had lost that buffed-up American sheen, and underneath the heavy make-up she was wearing she looked pale and wan, with dark shadows underneath her eyes. Her highlights had started to grow out at the roots, with little wiry grey hairs showing here and there, and she had lipstick on one of her teeth.
‘Um, are you sure that him getting back with Laura wasn’t closure?’
‘Not for me!’ shouted Pamela, popping two mints into her mouth. ‘And as soon as he sees me, I totally reckon he’ll reconsider.’
‘Do you really want him that much?’ said Rosie.
Pamela tilted her head.
‘Well. You know,’ she said. ‘There’s not a lot of men in this town.’
‘There’s nothing but men in this town,’ said Rosie, exasperated.
‘Yeah, if you want to marry a farmer. Or a primary school teacher.’
‘I would like that,’ said Rosie. ‘Come on, Pamela, you’ve been here for ten minutes. I’m sure there’s loads of other guys around here.’
‘Roy and I had a connection.’
‘Yeah, as long as you were debating brands of toothpaste,’ said Rosie. ‘Be sensible, Pamela.’
Pamela looked at her.
‘Well it’s all right for you, isn’t it, Miss Goody Two-shoes? With the man and the baby and the oh-so-sweetie sweetshop. Your life is totally sorted. So please don’t tell me how I should run mine.’
Rosie was completely taken aback by this. The idea that she could inspire jealousy in someone like Pamela had never crossed her mind.
‘All right then,’ she said. ‘Do you want me to call ahead to the surgery, see if he’s free?’
‘No,’ said Pamela, turning to leave without paying. ‘I want the element of surprise.’
‘How’s your morning been?’ Stephen had run up at lunchtime; he didn’t normally, but it wasn’t a full school day.
‘Surprising,’ said Rosie.
‘Oh,’ said Stephen, after she’d explained. ‘Ah.’
‘What?’
‘I heard shouting. On my way.’
‘Was it possibly dentist’s surgery shouting?’
‘I think I might have heard a drill going.’
‘Oh God, we should probably alert Moray.’
A thought struck her.
‘Laura isn’t back being his receptionist, is she?’
Stephen nodded slowly.
‘Oh my good Lord.’
With Tina off on honeymoon to Disneyland, Rosie was having to work harder than ever dealing with the Christmas rush, and they still had to go into Derby to look at the house. The longer they put the process off, the worse it would get. So on Christmas Eve, with Stephen complaining mightily, they all got into the Land Rover.
Being down in the lowlands, Derby wasn’t covered in snow at all, but instead was being lashed by heavy driving rain, which got in through the flaps along the side. Rosie sat in the back with Apostil in his car seat, keeping him cosy and occasionally shouting directions to Stephen, who was swearing mightily at the traffic. Everything was blurry: traffic lights and headlights, and tired-looking people anxious to get home, and huge trucks making great waves as they smashed through puddles, and huddled pedestrians with their heads down against the driving rain, waiting to cross roads that seemed to be lined with pound shops.
‘There’s a new Westfield,’ said Rosie brightly.
‘I don’t know what that is,’ said Stephen, who didn’t understand the concept of shopping.
‘Well go and call her, tell her to get up out of her sickbed and take our baby away,’ said Stephen, and Rosie silently fumed at him.)
Rosie stared so long at Hester that even Hester’s normally redoubtable self-confidence seemed to shrink a little, and she paid for her sweets and left, leaving Rosie furious and shaking and absolutely not in the mood for her next customer of the morning, as she heard spiky heels clopping up the street and looked with weariness at the skin-tight jeans and the tiny cropped furry coat and the huge pair of sunglasses even though there was no sun in the sky today and no prospect of any for quite some time.
‘Pamela.’
The door tinging was less of a welcoming ring and more of a clanging doom chime.
‘My brother is a prick,’ said Pamela, without bothering with any of the niceties. Old Mrs Brown, who was browsing for humbugs, scurried to one side.
‘Um, yes, sorry about yesterday, we had a lot going on,’ said Rosie. ‘Do you want to see Apostil?’
‘Yeah, great. Well done. Et cetera,’ said Pamela.
‘What are you up to?’ said Rosie politely. ‘Are your builders still in?’
‘Oh no, I told them if they weren’t clear by the weekend they’d not be getting paid. Triple shifts. You’ve got to be firm with these people.’
‘Okay,’ said Rosie.
‘No, I’m on my way to have it out with him once and for all,’ said Pamela.
‘Who?’ said Rosie.
‘Roy, of course.’
‘Uh, of course,’ said Rosie. She had rather thought that Roy snogging his ex-wife and getting back together with her in front of everyone in the entire town might have settled the matter pretty conclusively, but she wasn’t going to step in front of Pamela’s wrath.
‘Give me some chewing gum.’
‘We don’t stock it,’ said Rosie apologetically. ‘Lilian thinks it’s common.’
Pamela rolled her eyes.
‘How can it be when I want some?’
Rosie didn’t have an answer to that, so brought out the sugar-free mints instead.
‘What are you going to say to him?’
‘Apart from the fact that he’s a cock-sucking son of a bitch … sorry, Appy.’
Apostil beamed cheerfully. It slightly tickled Rosie that he seemed to love his aunt Pamela so completely. It was a combination of her making a lot of noise and wearing masses of sparkly, shiny things that attracted his attention, plus the fact that she didn’t coo or fuss over him. It reminded Rosie of those people who didn’t like cats, who would instantly have the nearest cat drape itself over them.
‘No, I just need to hear it from him. For closure, you know what I mean?’
Close up, Pamela didn’t look as tremendous as usual. Her skin had lost that buffed-up American sheen, and underneath the heavy make-up she was wearing she looked pale and wan, with dark shadows underneath her eyes. Her highlights had started to grow out at the roots, with little wiry grey hairs showing here and there, and she had lipstick on one of her teeth.
‘Um, are you sure that him getting back with Laura wasn’t closure?’
‘Not for me!’ shouted Pamela, popping two mints into her mouth. ‘And as soon as he sees me, I totally reckon he’ll reconsider.’
‘Do you really want him that much?’ said Rosie.
Pamela tilted her head.
‘Well. You know,’ she said. ‘There’s not a lot of men in this town.’
‘There’s nothing but men in this town,’ said Rosie, exasperated.
‘Yeah, if you want to marry a farmer. Or a primary school teacher.’
‘I would like that,’ said Rosie. ‘Come on, Pamela, you’ve been here for ten minutes. I’m sure there’s loads of other guys around here.’
‘Roy and I had a connection.’
‘Yeah, as long as you were debating brands of toothpaste,’ said Rosie. ‘Be sensible, Pamela.’
Pamela looked at her.
‘Well it’s all right for you, isn’t it, Miss Goody Two-shoes? With the man and the baby and the oh-so-sweetie sweetshop. Your life is totally sorted. So please don’t tell me how I should run mine.’
Rosie was completely taken aback by this. The idea that she could inspire jealousy in someone like Pamela had never crossed her mind.
‘All right then,’ she said. ‘Do you want me to call ahead to the surgery, see if he’s free?’
‘No,’ said Pamela, turning to leave without paying. ‘I want the element of surprise.’
‘How’s your morning been?’ Stephen had run up at lunchtime; he didn’t normally, but it wasn’t a full school day.
‘Surprising,’ said Rosie.
‘Oh,’ said Stephen, after she’d explained. ‘Ah.’
‘What?’
‘I heard shouting. On my way.’
‘Was it possibly dentist’s surgery shouting?’
‘I think I might have heard a drill going.’
‘Oh God, we should probably alert Moray.’
A thought struck her.
‘Laura isn’t back being his receptionist, is she?’
Stephen nodded slowly.
‘Oh my good Lord.’
With Tina off on honeymoon to Disneyland, Rosie was having to work harder than ever dealing with the Christmas rush, and they still had to go into Derby to look at the house. The longer they put the process off, the worse it would get. So on Christmas Eve, with Stephen complaining mightily, they all got into the Land Rover.
Being down in the lowlands, Derby wasn’t covered in snow at all, but instead was being lashed by heavy driving rain, which got in through the flaps along the side. Rosie sat in the back with Apostil in his car seat, keeping him cosy and occasionally shouting directions to Stephen, who was swearing mightily at the traffic. Everything was blurry: traffic lights and headlights, and tired-looking people anxious to get home, and huge trucks making great waves as they smashed through puddles, and huddled pedestrians with their heads down against the driving rain, waiting to cross roads that seemed to be lined with pound shops.
‘There’s a new Westfield,’ said Rosie brightly.
‘I don’t know what that is,’ said Stephen, who didn’t understand the concept of shopping.
