The Darkest Minds
Page 118
I was off-balance on my toes; the world swaying dangerously under me as his lips traveled to my cheek, to my jaw, to where my pulse throbbed in my neck. He seemed so sure of himself, like he had already plotted out this course.
I didn’t feel it happen, the slip. Even if I had, I was so wrapped up in him that I couldn’t imagine pulling back or letting go of his warm skin or that moment. His touch was feather-light, stroking my skin with a kind of reverence, but the instant his lips found mine again, a single thought was enough to rocket me out of the honey-sweet haze.
The memory of Clancy’s face as he had leaned in to do exactly what Liam was doing now suddenly flooded my mind, twisting its way through me until I couldn’t ignore it. Until I was seeing it play out glossy and burning like it was someone else’s memory and not mine.
And then I realized—I wasn’t the only one seeing it. Liam was seeing it, too.
How, how, how? That wasn’t possible, was it? Memories flowed to me, not from me.
But I felt him grow still, then pull back. And I knew, I knew by the look on his face, that he had seen it.
Air filled my chest. “Oh my God, I’m sorry, I didn’t want—he—”
Liam caught one of my wrists and pulled me back to him, his hands cupping my cheeks. I wondered which one of us was breathing harder as he brushed my hair from my face. I tried to squirm away, ashamed of what he’d seen, and afraid of what he’d think of me.
When Liam spoke, it was in a measured, would-be-calm voice. “What did he do?”
“Nothing—”
“Don’t lie,” he begged. “Please don’t lie to me. I felt it…my whole body. God, it was like being turned to stone. You were scared—I felt it, you were scared!”
His fingers came up and wove through my hair, bringing my face close to his again. “He…” I started. “He asked to see a memory, and I let him, but when I tried to move away…I couldn’t get out, I couldn’t move, and then I blacked out. I don’t know what he did, but it hurt—it hurt so much.”
Liam pulled back and pressed his lips to my forehead. I felt the muscles in his arms strain, shake. “Go to the cabin.” He didn’t let me protest. “Start packing.”
“Lee—”
“I’m going to find Chubs,” he said. “And the three of us are getting the hell out of here. Tonight.”
“We can’t,” I said. “You know we can’t.” But he was already crashing back through the dark path. “Lee!”
I went back to find his sweater, and pulled it on, but not even that could keep away the chill as I followed him out of the woods, back in the direction of the cabin and fire pit.
When I got to the cabin, Chubs was already there, propped up on his bed reading. He took one look at me and snapped his book shut. “What in the world happened?”
“We’re leaving,” I told him. “Get your things—what are you staring at? Move!”
He jumped down off the bed. “Are you okay?” he asked. “What’s going on?”
I had only just finished telling him everything that had happened with Clancy, when Liam came bursting through the door. He took one look at the two of us together and let out a shaky breath. “I got worried when I couldn’t find you,” he told Chubs. “Are you ready?”
I pulled on a baggy T-shirt and took Liam’s jacket when he threw it to me. Chubs tied up his shoes, snapped his suitcase shut, and didn’t put in a word of protest as we switched off the cabin lights and headed out into the darkness.
The smell of smoke from the fire pit followed us down the main trail longer than the light or the voices from it. I caught Chubs looking back toward it over his shoulder, just once; the distant orange glow reflected in the lenses of his glasses. I knew he wanted to ask what we would do next, but Liam hushed us both and started down a side trail that I had never seen before.
It was well-worn but narrow enough that we had to walk single file. I kept my eyes on Liam’s shoulders until he reached back to take my hand. The trail grew darker the farther we walked into the thick layers of young trees.
And then we were out, and there was light—so much of it, that for a moment I had to hold up a hand to cover my eyes. I felt Liam tense and stop, his hand tightening around mine until it hurt.
“Told you,” I heard Hayes say. “Told you he’d try to get out this way.”
“Yes, good call.”
“Damn,” I heard Chubs swear behind me, but I was too shocked to do anything other than step out from behind Liam, and see where Clancy, Hayes, and the cluster of boys from Watch stood blocking our only way out.
TWENTY-SEVEN
THERE WAS A SINGLE MOMENT when no one moved at all.
I recognized where we were now that the area was lit up with flashlights and lanterns. I had seen it once before, on Clancy’s computer screen. This is where, days before, the skip tracers had tried to slip through the camp’s wire fences and Hayes had “taken care” of them. Much like how he seemed poised to take care of us now.
The boys in front of us stood where the path met the silver wire marking East River’s boundaries. Clancy was at the center, looking infinitely more pulled together than he had a few short hours ago.
“I think we need to have a talk,” Clancy said, his voice pleasant. “It seems like something dangerous is about to happen.”
“We’re heading out,” Liam said, the anger in his voice barely contained. “And we don’t want trouble.”
I didn’t feel it happen, the slip. Even if I had, I was so wrapped up in him that I couldn’t imagine pulling back or letting go of his warm skin or that moment. His touch was feather-light, stroking my skin with a kind of reverence, but the instant his lips found mine again, a single thought was enough to rocket me out of the honey-sweet haze.
The memory of Clancy’s face as he had leaned in to do exactly what Liam was doing now suddenly flooded my mind, twisting its way through me until I couldn’t ignore it. Until I was seeing it play out glossy and burning like it was someone else’s memory and not mine.
And then I realized—I wasn’t the only one seeing it. Liam was seeing it, too.
How, how, how? That wasn’t possible, was it? Memories flowed to me, not from me.
But I felt him grow still, then pull back. And I knew, I knew by the look on his face, that he had seen it.
Air filled my chest. “Oh my God, I’m sorry, I didn’t want—he—”
Liam caught one of my wrists and pulled me back to him, his hands cupping my cheeks. I wondered which one of us was breathing harder as he brushed my hair from my face. I tried to squirm away, ashamed of what he’d seen, and afraid of what he’d think of me.
When Liam spoke, it was in a measured, would-be-calm voice. “What did he do?”
“Nothing—”
“Don’t lie,” he begged. “Please don’t lie to me. I felt it…my whole body. God, it was like being turned to stone. You were scared—I felt it, you were scared!”
His fingers came up and wove through my hair, bringing my face close to his again. “He…” I started. “He asked to see a memory, and I let him, but when I tried to move away…I couldn’t get out, I couldn’t move, and then I blacked out. I don’t know what he did, but it hurt—it hurt so much.”
Liam pulled back and pressed his lips to my forehead. I felt the muscles in his arms strain, shake. “Go to the cabin.” He didn’t let me protest. “Start packing.”
“Lee—”
“I’m going to find Chubs,” he said. “And the three of us are getting the hell out of here. Tonight.”
“We can’t,” I said. “You know we can’t.” But he was already crashing back through the dark path. “Lee!”
I went back to find his sweater, and pulled it on, but not even that could keep away the chill as I followed him out of the woods, back in the direction of the cabin and fire pit.
When I got to the cabin, Chubs was already there, propped up on his bed reading. He took one look at me and snapped his book shut. “What in the world happened?”
“We’re leaving,” I told him. “Get your things—what are you staring at? Move!”
He jumped down off the bed. “Are you okay?” he asked. “What’s going on?”
I had only just finished telling him everything that had happened with Clancy, when Liam came bursting through the door. He took one look at the two of us together and let out a shaky breath. “I got worried when I couldn’t find you,” he told Chubs. “Are you ready?”
I pulled on a baggy T-shirt and took Liam’s jacket when he threw it to me. Chubs tied up his shoes, snapped his suitcase shut, and didn’t put in a word of protest as we switched off the cabin lights and headed out into the darkness.
The smell of smoke from the fire pit followed us down the main trail longer than the light or the voices from it. I caught Chubs looking back toward it over his shoulder, just once; the distant orange glow reflected in the lenses of his glasses. I knew he wanted to ask what we would do next, but Liam hushed us both and started down a side trail that I had never seen before.
It was well-worn but narrow enough that we had to walk single file. I kept my eyes on Liam’s shoulders until he reached back to take my hand. The trail grew darker the farther we walked into the thick layers of young trees.
And then we were out, and there was light—so much of it, that for a moment I had to hold up a hand to cover my eyes. I felt Liam tense and stop, his hand tightening around mine until it hurt.
“Told you,” I heard Hayes say. “Told you he’d try to get out this way.”
“Yes, good call.”
“Damn,” I heard Chubs swear behind me, but I was too shocked to do anything other than step out from behind Liam, and see where Clancy, Hayes, and the cluster of boys from Watch stood blocking our only way out.
TWENTY-SEVEN
THERE WAS A SINGLE MOMENT when no one moved at all.
I recognized where we were now that the area was lit up with flashlights and lanterns. I had seen it once before, on Clancy’s computer screen. This is where, days before, the skip tracers had tried to slip through the camp’s wire fences and Hayes had “taken care” of them. Much like how he seemed poised to take care of us now.
The boys in front of us stood where the path met the silver wire marking East River’s boundaries. Clancy was at the center, looking infinitely more pulled together than he had a few short hours ago.
“I think we need to have a talk,” Clancy said, his voice pleasant. “It seems like something dangerous is about to happen.”
“We’re heading out,” Liam said, the anger in his voice barely contained. “And we don’t want trouble.”
