The Glittering Court
Page 54
When he brought his mouth down to my neck, trailing kisses to my collarbone, I thought I would melt. We clung to each other in the night, struggling to get closer and closer. Though all our clothes remained on, at one point I ended up on top of him, uncaring that it hiked my skirt up to my knee. He tangled his fingers in my hair as we kissed, freeing it from the carefully placed pins.
Then, at last, I paused for breath, managing to sit up—albeit in a very brazen way that still straddled his hips. He ran his fingers along the side of my face, tracing my cheekbone before sliding back to the unruly waves of my hair.
“Disheveled,” I said, smoothing his own hair back. “Just like you always wanted.”
“I . . . have wanted a lot more than that,” he admitted, voice husky. But he dropped his hand with a sigh. “But your future husband won’t thank me for this.”
“‘Future’ being the important word. I don’t have a husband yet. And until I do, I can make my own choice.” I considered that for a few moments. “Actually, I intend to make my own choices even after I have a husband.”
“I’m sure you do, but I’m also pretty sure my father would have some very, uh, strong opinions about this. We’re your caretakers—your guardians. We’re supposed to protect you and support you until you can move on to some extravagant marriage offer.”
Words I’d heard so many times. “And get you an equally extravagant commission.”
He sat up, gently shifting me off him. “I don’t care about that.”
I thought about our original plan. I thought about the riders in the night and the gunshots. Cedric needed to get out of here.
“I care about it,” I said softly. “Have you had any luck with the painting?”
“Not exactly. No one really doubts its authenticity. But Walter— my agent—is having trouble finding anyone with enough money.”
I stood up and brushed off my skirt, more out of habit than anything else. “Then I guess it’s up to me to secure your stake.”
“Don’t do anything you don’t want,” he warned, joining me and shaking out the cloak.
My heart still beat rapidly. I want you, I thought. I want you to kiss me again and lay me back down in that field.
But although my body was heated, my mind was cool. Maybe I was free to do what I wanted right now, but he was right that there would be terrible, terrible consequences if there was any whisper of what had just happened between us. We slowly continued our walk back to the house, both of us lost in thought. I hardened myself. Marriage wasn’t about love and wanting. It was about business, and I needed to get back to that business. One slip could be forgiven, but not a second one—no matter what my heart wanted to tell me. And right now, it had a lot to say.
Cedric was apparently thinking along the same lines when Wisteria Hollow came into sight. We stopped on the far edge of the property, and he looked back down at me. “What do you want to do about Warren?”
“I don’t know. I mean, I don’t want to marry into that situation, but—”
“Then don’t,” he said firmly. “That’s all I had to hear.”
I eyed him warily. “What are you going to do?”
“Protect you from him. Keep him out of your schedule and put other suitors in. Maybe there’ll be someone else you like.”
I supposed he was right, but as we stood there, I doubted it. Because suddenly, I was pretty sure why every gentleman I’d met in the last week had seemed so lackluster. I was comparing everyone to Cedric—and there was no comparison.
“Your father isn’t going to like your excluding Warren,” I warned. “He’ll fight you on it.”
“Probably. But remember, it’s always your choice. You can choose someone else—someone not holding a secret over you—even if he doesn’t have as much money to give.”
When we reached the house, Cedric told me he’d be going around to the front door and that no one would think anything of him coming in late after allegedly being out on the town with friends.
“Really?” I asked, unable to hide my bitterness. “How nice, to have no limitations on your movements. Meanwhile, every move we girls make is scrutinized.”
“Hey, our job is to protect your virtue . . .”
Faint light from the house illuminated his features, and I saw his smile fade as he reflected that he had not, perhaps, done such a good job at that tonight.
“Well,” I said. “At least your intentions were good.”
“That depends on which intentions you’re talking about.” He shoved his hands in his coat pockets and looked up at the sky, his gaze resting on the moon. “Do you know why the six wayward angels fell?”
“I know what the priests say. It’s probably not what you’ll say.”
“Alanziel and Deanziel were the first two to rebel. They fell in love, but that wasn’t allowed, not for angels. They were supposed to be above human passions, but their love was so great, they were willing to defy the laws of gods and men. Uros banished them, and the other four wayward angels soon followed. They refused to close themselves off to emotion. They wanted to embrace the feelings within them and guide mortals to do the same.”
I held my breath as he spoke, not sure what I was waiting for.
Cedric pointed at the moon. “Uros didn’t just ban Alanziel and Deanziel from the divine realms for succumbing to their passions. They were banned from each other too. She is the sun, and he is the moon. And they’re never together. Sometimes, at the right time of day, they can catch a glimpse of each other across the sky. Nothing more.”
I exhaled. “What about during an eclipse?”
He took so long to answer that I thought he hadn’t heard me. Then: “Those don’t really happen every day.”
“Seems like it’d only need to happen once.”
He turned from the moon, and although his face was shadowed, I was pretty sure I could see him smiling. The tension between us faded—for now, at least. “Are we still talking about Alanziel and Deanziel?” he asked.
“How should I know? You’re the heretic, not me.”
“Right. You’re just the daring escape artist who saves heretics like me. Now, tell me how you plan on getting back into the house.” When I showed him the trellis I’d be climbing up, he was astonished. “That?”
I straightened up proudly. “Sure, why not? I told you a long time ago I can do stuff like this. And Mira does it all the time.”
He winced. “I don’t even want to know. And I guess I shouldn’t be surprised. You’re fearless. She’s fearless. There’s no going against either of you.”
With a jolt, I remembered the old rumors. He’d acted very self-assured back there under the stars, with hands and lips that knew exactly what they were doing. It seemed naïve to think that, between his goings-on at the university and with the Alanzans, he wouldn’t have some experience with women. But the idea that I might have been preceded by my best friend was particularly troubling.
I nearly asked him then and there. Instead, we bid each other an awkward good night, pointedly keeping distance between us. He watched me scale the trellis until I was safely in the attic before going on his own way. I reclaimed the robe and made it back to my room without detection.
Then, at last, I paused for breath, managing to sit up—albeit in a very brazen way that still straddled his hips. He ran his fingers along the side of my face, tracing my cheekbone before sliding back to the unruly waves of my hair.
“Disheveled,” I said, smoothing his own hair back. “Just like you always wanted.”
“I . . . have wanted a lot more than that,” he admitted, voice husky. But he dropped his hand with a sigh. “But your future husband won’t thank me for this.”
“‘Future’ being the important word. I don’t have a husband yet. And until I do, I can make my own choice.” I considered that for a few moments. “Actually, I intend to make my own choices even after I have a husband.”
“I’m sure you do, but I’m also pretty sure my father would have some very, uh, strong opinions about this. We’re your caretakers—your guardians. We’re supposed to protect you and support you until you can move on to some extravagant marriage offer.”
Words I’d heard so many times. “And get you an equally extravagant commission.”
He sat up, gently shifting me off him. “I don’t care about that.”
I thought about our original plan. I thought about the riders in the night and the gunshots. Cedric needed to get out of here.
“I care about it,” I said softly. “Have you had any luck with the painting?”
“Not exactly. No one really doubts its authenticity. But Walter— my agent—is having trouble finding anyone with enough money.”
I stood up and brushed off my skirt, more out of habit than anything else. “Then I guess it’s up to me to secure your stake.”
“Don’t do anything you don’t want,” he warned, joining me and shaking out the cloak.
My heart still beat rapidly. I want you, I thought. I want you to kiss me again and lay me back down in that field.
But although my body was heated, my mind was cool. Maybe I was free to do what I wanted right now, but he was right that there would be terrible, terrible consequences if there was any whisper of what had just happened between us. We slowly continued our walk back to the house, both of us lost in thought. I hardened myself. Marriage wasn’t about love and wanting. It was about business, and I needed to get back to that business. One slip could be forgiven, but not a second one—no matter what my heart wanted to tell me. And right now, it had a lot to say.
Cedric was apparently thinking along the same lines when Wisteria Hollow came into sight. We stopped on the far edge of the property, and he looked back down at me. “What do you want to do about Warren?”
“I don’t know. I mean, I don’t want to marry into that situation, but—”
“Then don’t,” he said firmly. “That’s all I had to hear.”
I eyed him warily. “What are you going to do?”
“Protect you from him. Keep him out of your schedule and put other suitors in. Maybe there’ll be someone else you like.”
I supposed he was right, but as we stood there, I doubted it. Because suddenly, I was pretty sure why every gentleman I’d met in the last week had seemed so lackluster. I was comparing everyone to Cedric—and there was no comparison.
“Your father isn’t going to like your excluding Warren,” I warned. “He’ll fight you on it.”
“Probably. But remember, it’s always your choice. You can choose someone else—someone not holding a secret over you—even if he doesn’t have as much money to give.”
When we reached the house, Cedric told me he’d be going around to the front door and that no one would think anything of him coming in late after allegedly being out on the town with friends.
“Really?” I asked, unable to hide my bitterness. “How nice, to have no limitations on your movements. Meanwhile, every move we girls make is scrutinized.”
“Hey, our job is to protect your virtue . . .”
Faint light from the house illuminated his features, and I saw his smile fade as he reflected that he had not, perhaps, done such a good job at that tonight.
“Well,” I said. “At least your intentions were good.”
“That depends on which intentions you’re talking about.” He shoved his hands in his coat pockets and looked up at the sky, his gaze resting on the moon. “Do you know why the six wayward angels fell?”
“I know what the priests say. It’s probably not what you’ll say.”
“Alanziel and Deanziel were the first two to rebel. They fell in love, but that wasn’t allowed, not for angels. They were supposed to be above human passions, but their love was so great, they were willing to defy the laws of gods and men. Uros banished them, and the other four wayward angels soon followed. They refused to close themselves off to emotion. They wanted to embrace the feelings within them and guide mortals to do the same.”
I held my breath as he spoke, not sure what I was waiting for.
Cedric pointed at the moon. “Uros didn’t just ban Alanziel and Deanziel from the divine realms for succumbing to their passions. They were banned from each other too. She is the sun, and he is the moon. And they’re never together. Sometimes, at the right time of day, they can catch a glimpse of each other across the sky. Nothing more.”
I exhaled. “What about during an eclipse?”
He took so long to answer that I thought he hadn’t heard me. Then: “Those don’t really happen every day.”
“Seems like it’d only need to happen once.”
He turned from the moon, and although his face was shadowed, I was pretty sure I could see him smiling. The tension between us faded—for now, at least. “Are we still talking about Alanziel and Deanziel?” he asked.
“How should I know? You’re the heretic, not me.”
“Right. You’re just the daring escape artist who saves heretics like me. Now, tell me how you plan on getting back into the house.” When I showed him the trellis I’d be climbing up, he was astonished. “That?”
I straightened up proudly. “Sure, why not? I told you a long time ago I can do stuff like this. And Mira does it all the time.”
He winced. “I don’t even want to know. And I guess I shouldn’t be surprised. You’re fearless. She’s fearless. There’s no going against either of you.”
With a jolt, I remembered the old rumors. He’d acted very self-assured back there under the stars, with hands and lips that knew exactly what they were doing. It seemed naïve to think that, between his goings-on at the university and with the Alanzans, he wouldn’t have some experience with women. But the idea that I might have been preceded by my best friend was particularly troubling.
I nearly asked him then and there. Instead, we bid each other an awkward good night, pointedly keeping distance between us. He watched me scale the trellis until I was safely in the attic before going on his own way. I reclaimed the robe and made it back to my room without detection.
