The One Real Thing
Page 90
“I could cope on my own if he wasn’t in my way.”
“Is it him?” Cooper sighed. He hated this crap. “Is he fucking with your head?” He’d hired Dean as an extra cook to help out during high season.
“He thinks it isn’t fancy enough.” Crosby rubbed his forehead, looking at the menu. “I started to think maybe he was right.”
“The menu stays as it is. And when Dean gets in today I’ll tell him the same thing, and if he doesn’t like it he can leave.”
Crosby nodded, looking relieved. “Okay. Sorry, boss.”
“Jesus,” Cooper muttered and strode out of the kitchen. His cook needed to get a social life. Making his job his life was turning him into an even bigger nut than he already was.
“Hey.”
The familiar soft voice shot through him and he looked over toward to the door to see Jess stepping inside the bar. He immediately crossed the room to her, his irritation dying on the spot. “Hey, yourself.” He wrapped his arms around her waist, drawing her to him for a kiss.
“It’s good to see you.” He looked into her eyes as he pulled back and his happiness at seeing her dimmed. “What’s going on?”
“I . . . uh . . .” She sighed, her fingers tensing against his shoulders. “I just had an encounter with Dana.”
And this morning just keeps getting better. “What now?”
“Oh, she had something very interesting to say.” Jessica pulled away, only to take a chair off a table and hop up onto the space it had made. He tried not to be distracted by the reminder of the first time they’d had sex together.
He crossed his arms over his chest, willing the memory out for now. “Hit me with it.”
Jessica gave him an inscrutable look. “She said that you want kids more than anything and that when you found out she couldn’t have them, you resented her for it, that you were cold and distant and she got hurt, that she wouldn’t talk about adoption and then took her hurt out on you by cheating on you . . .”
His gut tightened.
His blood heated.
For a second he couldn’t even speak, he was that mad.
“Cooper?”
He held up a hand, needing a minute.
Finally, when he felt like he wasn’t going to throw a table through the window, he choked out, “She would tell it like that.”
Jessica hopped off the table and came to him, sliding her hands up his arms and around to clasp the back of his neck. She stared up into his eyes, showing him all the things she felt for him but had never said. “I’m sorry she’s such a bitch, Coop.”
And just like that he found himself laughing.
Calling Dana a bitch at this point was such a goddamn understatement.
He wrapped his arms around her, pulling her close. “Don’t you think if I wanted kids more than I wanted to have them with someone who meant something to me that I’d have started on that as soon as my divorce finalized?”
She gave a soft smile. “Yes.”
“So do you want to hear the real story?”
“If you’re willing to tell it.”
“It’s just another example of what an idiot I was to marry her.” He nudged her back over to the table and lifted her onto it. He wrapped her legs around his hips, keeping them connected. “I want kids. Back when I thought I knew her, I wanted them with Dana. We talked about it; she said she wanted kids, too. Outright said it. So as far as I knew we were trying. A few months went by and nothing happened, and I discovered why when I found the damn pill in her purse.”
Jess gasped. “She was still taking the pill?”
“Yep.” He no longer felt the betrayal and confusion he’d felt back then. But he remembered the ugly feelings. There was nothing worse than the realization that you didn’t know the person who lay in your bed as well as you thought you did. “I confronted her and she cried a lot, promised me that she just got scared and that she really did want to have children. She said that. She said it straight to my face: ‘I want kids with you, Cooper.’ So I forgave her and we tried again.
“Nothing happened again and we argued because I thought she was still on the pill. She denied it and said we needed to go to the doctors to see what was wrong. Turned out this time she wasn’t lying. She’d had something called an ectopic pregnancy just after high school that I didn’t know about.”
“Jesus,” Jessica muttered.
“I learned that was partly why she’d been afraid to get pregnant to begin with. But she could have told me that.”
“She could have,” Jess agreed.
“I think she was ashamed.” He shook his head, not understanding that shit. “The problem pregnancy damaged one of her tubes. Significantly. We couldn’t afford IVF so adoption was our only option. Dana didn’t want to adopt. In fact, she was relieved about the whole thing. Turned out she didn’t want kids after all. We argued a lot. All the time, in fact. And then she cheated.”
“I’m sorry,” Jess whispered, her fingers tangling his hair the way he liked. “I’m so sorry.”
“Done now, Doc.”
“Yeah.” She frowned.
“What is it?”
“It’s just . . . Dana seemed . . . She really seemed to regret how she acted. She said that she acted out of hurt.”
“That might be true. I tried to understand where her head was at about the whole kids thing because she’d been through a lot, but she wouldn’t talk about it. She just got defensive and argumentative. Who knows with Dana what the truth is anymore? She has gotten pretty good at constructing fairy tales.”
“Is it him?” Cooper sighed. He hated this crap. “Is he fucking with your head?” He’d hired Dean as an extra cook to help out during high season.
“He thinks it isn’t fancy enough.” Crosby rubbed his forehead, looking at the menu. “I started to think maybe he was right.”
“The menu stays as it is. And when Dean gets in today I’ll tell him the same thing, and if he doesn’t like it he can leave.”
Crosby nodded, looking relieved. “Okay. Sorry, boss.”
“Jesus,” Cooper muttered and strode out of the kitchen. His cook needed to get a social life. Making his job his life was turning him into an even bigger nut than he already was.
“Hey.”
The familiar soft voice shot through him and he looked over toward to the door to see Jess stepping inside the bar. He immediately crossed the room to her, his irritation dying on the spot. “Hey, yourself.” He wrapped his arms around her waist, drawing her to him for a kiss.
“It’s good to see you.” He looked into her eyes as he pulled back and his happiness at seeing her dimmed. “What’s going on?”
“I . . . uh . . .” She sighed, her fingers tensing against his shoulders. “I just had an encounter with Dana.”
And this morning just keeps getting better. “What now?”
“Oh, she had something very interesting to say.” Jessica pulled away, only to take a chair off a table and hop up onto the space it had made. He tried not to be distracted by the reminder of the first time they’d had sex together.
He crossed his arms over his chest, willing the memory out for now. “Hit me with it.”
Jessica gave him an inscrutable look. “She said that you want kids more than anything and that when you found out she couldn’t have them, you resented her for it, that you were cold and distant and she got hurt, that she wouldn’t talk about adoption and then took her hurt out on you by cheating on you . . .”
His gut tightened.
His blood heated.
For a second he couldn’t even speak, he was that mad.
“Cooper?”
He held up a hand, needing a minute.
Finally, when he felt like he wasn’t going to throw a table through the window, he choked out, “She would tell it like that.”
Jessica hopped off the table and came to him, sliding her hands up his arms and around to clasp the back of his neck. She stared up into his eyes, showing him all the things she felt for him but had never said. “I’m sorry she’s such a bitch, Coop.”
And just like that he found himself laughing.
Calling Dana a bitch at this point was such a goddamn understatement.
He wrapped his arms around her, pulling her close. “Don’t you think if I wanted kids more than I wanted to have them with someone who meant something to me that I’d have started on that as soon as my divorce finalized?”
She gave a soft smile. “Yes.”
“So do you want to hear the real story?”
“If you’re willing to tell it.”
“It’s just another example of what an idiot I was to marry her.” He nudged her back over to the table and lifted her onto it. He wrapped her legs around his hips, keeping them connected. “I want kids. Back when I thought I knew her, I wanted them with Dana. We talked about it; she said she wanted kids, too. Outright said it. So as far as I knew we were trying. A few months went by and nothing happened, and I discovered why when I found the damn pill in her purse.”
Jess gasped. “She was still taking the pill?”
“Yep.” He no longer felt the betrayal and confusion he’d felt back then. But he remembered the ugly feelings. There was nothing worse than the realization that you didn’t know the person who lay in your bed as well as you thought you did. “I confronted her and she cried a lot, promised me that she just got scared and that she really did want to have children. She said that. She said it straight to my face: ‘I want kids with you, Cooper.’ So I forgave her and we tried again.
“Nothing happened again and we argued because I thought she was still on the pill. She denied it and said we needed to go to the doctors to see what was wrong. Turned out this time she wasn’t lying. She’d had something called an ectopic pregnancy just after high school that I didn’t know about.”
“Jesus,” Jessica muttered.
“I learned that was partly why she’d been afraid to get pregnant to begin with. But she could have told me that.”
“She could have,” Jess agreed.
“I think she was ashamed.” He shook his head, not understanding that shit. “The problem pregnancy damaged one of her tubes. Significantly. We couldn’t afford IVF so adoption was our only option. Dana didn’t want to adopt. In fact, she was relieved about the whole thing. Turned out she didn’t want kids after all. We argued a lot. All the time, in fact. And then she cheated.”
“I’m sorry,” Jess whispered, her fingers tangling his hair the way he liked. “I’m so sorry.”
“Done now, Doc.”
“Yeah.” She frowned.
“What is it?”
“It’s just . . . Dana seemed . . . She really seemed to regret how she acted. She said that she acted out of hurt.”
“That might be true. I tried to understand where her head was at about the whole kids thing because she’d been through a lot, but she wouldn’t talk about it. She just got defensive and argumentative. Who knows with Dana what the truth is anymore? She has gotten pretty good at constructing fairy tales.”
