The Rocker That Needs Me
Page 33
“I wanted to make tonight special. Show you how special you are to me. I thought that bringing you here would help do that. It’s supposed to be one of the most romantic restaurants in the city.” He released my hand and pulled his wallet out of his pocket. Tossing a few big bills on the table he stood, and grasping my hand once more, pulled me toward the door.
I was speechless as he pushed open the door and pulled me out onto the street. Minutes later, we were in a taxi heading toward his apartment. I didn’t say anything, and he was busy on his cell ordering Chinese. Then he was talking to Shane. “I don’t care where you go. Just don’t fucking be there when we get home.”
A happy grin teased at my lips and I sat back. I wasn’t spoiled. Nope, not even a little!
“What’s that smile for?” Drake murmured as he put his phone back in his pocket.
I shrugged. “Sorry. I was just thinking I am a spoiled bitch.”
He grinned. “Yeah, you really are.”
Chapter 15
Drake
What was I thinking?
I had wanted to show Lana that I had changed. That this time, things were going to be different. I didn’t want to be just friends. I wanted it all! A romantic restaurant had been my big idea to show her that. I should have known that Lana wouldn’t like it.
I was surprised that she didn’t laugh in my face. I knew that she hated those kinds of places. All I had ended up doing was hurting her. I was such an idiot.
Now, as we sat on the floor in the living room, the television on some mindless movie that I was sure I had watched with her before, I felt at peace. How had I lived without her for so long? How could I live without her now?
She was laughing at something that was happening on the movie, eating beef broccoli with her chopsticks. Her hair fell over her shoulders and her dress was riding up her thighs, showing me her slightly golden legs. She was relaxed, enjoying our time together. It was almost like old times…
But this time I wasn’t going to let her slip through my fingers. She loved me once…Did she still? I was too much of a coward to ask. Dropping my chopsticks into my carton of noodles and chicken, I set them aside and turned to face her. “Lana…”
“Hmm?” she murmured without looking at me.
“I’ve missed you,” I confessed.
She pushed her food away and turned so she faced me. “I have missed you too, Drake.”
I cupped her face in my hands. “I…Rehab was bad. I nearly gave up a few times.” More than a few times, but there was only one thing that kept me going…“All I could think about was you. When I wanted to give up I would reach for my sketch pad and start drawing. Only when you were staring back at me did the need to give up ease.”
She swallowed hard. “I’m glad you kept going. When Shane told me you checked yourself in, I was so proud of you. That you’re still going strong…”
“It gets hard.” Fuck, did it get hard! I had nights when I literally shook with the need for a drink. Those nights felt like they lasted for days instead of hours. I had learned that those were the nights I needed a meeting. I needed to talk through my urge. Shane had helped me, going to the meetings, showing support when I didn’t feel like I deserved it.
“You’ve come a long way, babe.” She smiled. “I’m happy for you.”
“Can you forgive me, Angel?” I needed to know. If she couldn’t then there was no hope for our future, but if by some miracle she could... “Can you forgive me for what I did?”
Lana leaned forward, her hands covering mine. “I forgave you a long time ago, Drake. Maybe even as soon as it happened.” Her smile was sad. “I loved you. I would have forgiven you for anything.”
Loved? I hated the past tense of that word. I was determined to make her love me again. Fuck, it hadn’t been hard to make her fall in love with me the first time. If I actually worked at it this time…
My fingers shook as I pulled her closer. She came willingly and I took hope from that. Lana climbed onto my lap, and I just buried my face in her neck. Holding her like this was pure heaven, but the scent of her was driving me crazy. My lips developed a will of their own, and I kissed a trail from just under her ear to her collar bone.
A small whimper escaped her and her fingers clutched at my hair. “Drake…What are you doing?” She breathed.
I smiled against the pulse throbbing at the base of her throat. “Showing you how much I have missed you, Angel… Should I stop?”
“No…Yes… NO!” She tugged on my hair until my head was tilted back far enough for our eyes to meet. “Don’t stop, Drake,” she whispered before her lips covered my own.
The first taste of Lana on my tongue was mind blowing. I don’t think I have ever tasted anything so sweet. I thrust my tongue into her mouth, exploring her further. She sighed with delight and sucked my tongue deeper.
I was unable to keep my hands still. My left wrapped itself in her hair, holding her head at the angle I wanted. The other skimmed down her bare arm, across her hip, and between her silken thighs. Her skin was so soft, so perfect. Without actually realizing that I was doing it, my fingers traced the edge of her panties.
She pulled back, breaking the kiss. “Wait.” Her breathing was labored. “I… Just wait.” She pushed her hair away from her face. “I need to think.”
My fingers were still playing with her panties. “I’ve waited a lifetime,” I told her as her heat scalded my fingertips. “But if you want to go slower I will.” I wasn’t going to rush this. If she needed more time before I made love to her, then I would give it to her.
Lana
His kiss was drugging.
I probably shouldn’t have let him kiss me in the first place, but once those sinful lips touched mine, I was gone. Who was I kidding anyway? I knew what I had wanted the instant he had pulled me out of that stupid restaurant. All through dinner I kept feeling his eyes on me and knew—even if it was mostly unconsciously—that he wanted me just as much as I wanted him.
When I felt his fingers playing close to a place that had only ever been touched by one man, I got scared. Not because I was unsure if I was ready, or if this was what I wanted because if—no, when!—I made love with Drake, he would know that I had lied to him.
“Do you want me to stop?” he murmured, watching me closely.
I shook my head. “No… Just slow down.” I swallowed my nervousness and lowered my head to his again. His lips were damp from our first kiss. I sucked his bottom lip into my mouth, delighting in his taste.
I was speechless as he pushed open the door and pulled me out onto the street. Minutes later, we were in a taxi heading toward his apartment. I didn’t say anything, and he was busy on his cell ordering Chinese. Then he was talking to Shane. “I don’t care where you go. Just don’t fucking be there when we get home.”
A happy grin teased at my lips and I sat back. I wasn’t spoiled. Nope, not even a little!
“What’s that smile for?” Drake murmured as he put his phone back in his pocket.
I shrugged. “Sorry. I was just thinking I am a spoiled bitch.”
He grinned. “Yeah, you really are.”
Chapter 15
Drake
What was I thinking?
I had wanted to show Lana that I had changed. That this time, things were going to be different. I didn’t want to be just friends. I wanted it all! A romantic restaurant had been my big idea to show her that. I should have known that Lana wouldn’t like it.
I was surprised that she didn’t laugh in my face. I knew that she hated those kinds of places. All I had ended up doing was hurting her. I was such an idiot.
Now, as we sat on the floor in the living room, the television on some mindless movie that I was sure I had watched with her before, I felt at peace. How had I lived without her for so long? How could I live without her now?
She was laughing at something that was happening on the movie, eating beef broccoli with her chopsticks. Her hair fell over her shoulders and her dress was riding up her thighs, showing me her slightly golden legs. She was relaxed, enjoying our time together. It was almost like old times…
But this time I wasn’t going to let her slip through my fingers. She loved me once…Did she still? I was too much of a coward to ask. Dropping my chopsticks into my carton of noodles and chicken, I set them aside and turned to face her. “Lana…”
“Hmm?” she murmured without looking at me.
“I’ve missed you,” I confessed.
She pushed her food away and turned so she faced me. “I have missed you too, Drake.”
I cupped her face in my hands. “I…Rehab was bad. I nearly gave up a few times.” More than a few times, but there was only one thing that kept me going…“All I could think about was you. When I wanted to give up I would reach for my sketch pad and start drawing. Only when you were staring back at me did the need to give up ease.”
She swallowed hard. “I’m glad you kept going. When Shane told me you checked yourself in, I was so proud of you. That you’re still going strong…”
“It gets hard.” Fuck, did it get hard! I had nights when I literally shook with the need for a drink. Those nights felt like they lasted for days instead of hours. I had learned that those were the nights I needed a meeting. I needed to talk through my urge. Shane had helped me, going to the meetings, showing support when I didn’t feel like I deserved it.
“You’ve come a long way, babe.” She smiled. “I’m happy for you.”
“Can you forgive me, Angel?” I needed to know. If she couldn’t then there was no hope for our future, but if by some miracle she could... “Can you forgive me for what I did?”
Lana leaned forward, her hands covering mine. “I forgave you a long time ago, Drake. Maybe even as soon as it happened.” Her smile was sad. “I loved you. I would have forgiven you for anything.”
Loved? I hated the past tense of that word. I was determined to make her love me again. Fuck, it hadn’t been hard to make her fall in love with me the first time. If I actually worked at it this time…
My fingers shook as I pulled her closer. She came willingly and I took hope from that. Lana climbed onto my lap, and I just buried my face in her neck. Holding her like this was pure heaven, but the scent of her was driving me crazy. My lips developed a will of their own, and I kissed a trail from just under her ear to her collar bone.
A small whimper escaped her and her fingers clutched at my hair. “Drake…What are you doing?” She breathed.
I smiled against the pulse throbbing at the base of her throat. “Showing you how much I have missed you, Angel… Should I stop?”
“No…Yes… NO!” She tugged on my hair until my head was tilted back far enough for our eyes to meet. “Don’t stop, Drake,” she whispered before her lips covered my own.
The first taste of Lana on my tongue was mind blowing. I don’t think I have ever tasted anything so sweet. I thrust my tongue into her mouth, exploring her further. She sighed with delight and sucked my tongue deeper.
I was unable to keep my hands still. My left wrapped itself in her hair, holding her head at the angle I wanted. The other skimmed down her bare arm, across her hip, and between her silken thighs. Her skin was so soft, so perfect. Without actually realizing that I was doing it, my fingers traced the edge of her panties.
She pulled back, breaking the kiss. “Wait.” Her breathing was labored. “I… Just wait.” She pushed her hair away from her face. “I need to think.”
My fingers were still playing with her panties. “I’ve waited a lifetime,” I told her as her heat scalded my fingertips. “But if you want to go slower I will.” I wasn’t going to rush this. If she needed more time before I made love to her, then I would give it to her.
Lana
His kiss was drugging.
I probably shouldn’t have let him kiss me in the first place, but once those sinful lips touched mine, I was gone. Who was I kidding anyway? I knew what I had wanted the instant he had pulled me out of that stupid restaurant. All through dinner I kept feeling his eyes on me and knew—even if it was mostly unconsciously—that he wanted me just as much as I wanted him.
When I felt his fingers playing close to a place that had only ever been touched by one man, I got scared. Not because I was unsure if I was ready, or if this was what I wanted because if—no, when!—I made love with Drake, he would know that I had lied to him.
“Do you want me to stop?” he murmured, watching me closely.
I shook my head. “No… Just slow down.” I swallowed my nervousness and lowered my head to his again. His lips were damp from our first kiss. I sucked his bottom lip into my mouth, delighting in his taste.
