The Ruby Circle
Page 82
I know you think I should stay with Declan. Believe me, I wish I could. I wish more than anything that I could stay and raise Olive’s son—my son—and give him all the things he needs. But I can’t shake the feeling that we’d never be safe. Someday, someone might start asking about Olive and her son. Someone might connect the baby I’m raising to him, and then her fears would be realized. News of his conception would change our world. It would excite some people and scare others. Most of all, it’d make Olive’s predictions come true: people wanting to study him like a lab rat.
And that’s why I’m proposing that no one finds out he’s my son or Olive’s. From now on, let him be yours.
No one would question you two raising a dhampir. After all, your own children will be dhampirs, and from what I’ve seen, you two are smart enough to find a way to convince others he’s your biological child. I’ve also seen the way you two love each other, the way you support each other. Even with as challenging as your relationship has been, you’ve held true to yourselves and each other. That’s what Declan needs. That’s the kind of home Olive wanted for him, the kind I want for him.
I know it won’t be easy, and walking away from this is one of the hardest things I’ve had to do. If a day comes when I can feel convinced that it’s safe, beyond a doubt, for me to be in his life, then I will. You can use one of those magical methods of yours to find me, and I swear I’ll be there at his side in an instant. But until then, so long as the shadow of others’ fear and scrutiny hangs over him, I beg you to take him and give him the beautiful life I know you can give him.
Best,
Neil
Adrian’s hands were shaking as he finished reading the letter. Tears had formed in my eyes, and I was forced to blink them back. “He’s right,” I finally said. “We can find him with my magic. You don’t even need to use spirit.”
Adrian folded up the letter and took Declan from me. “But he’s also right about the risks.”
“What he’s asking is big . . .” I began. Neil was right that no one would question us having a dhampir child, but that didn’t mean the complications weren’t endless. Our own lives were already uncertain. I sank down on the couch, still holding Declan, my mind reeling.
When Adrian had first proposed to me, I’d been nervous, not for lack of love but because being a nineteen-year-old bride had never been in my plans. And being a nineteen-year-old mother? That was definitely not in my plans. But then, was anything turning out the way I’d expected? I studied Declan’s face, loving all the little perfect details but also fully aware that if I committed to him, any attempts at salvaging the future I’d wanted—a home with Adrian, college, normality—were going to be seriously thwarted. And yet, how could I abandon Declan?
I looked up at Adrian. “I don’t know what to do. I don’t have the answer.” I realized those weren’t words I uttered very often.
Adrian took a deep breath and glanced at those around us. “I think . . . I think maybe we need to ask for some help with this.”
I understood the suggestion and considered it. The fewer people who knew the truth about Declan, the better. But what was being asked of us was too big for us to shoulder alone. We needed allies we could trust in deciding Declan’s future, and glancing around at those gathered—Rose, Dimitri, Eddie, and Daniella—I realized these were the people we could count on. “Okay,” I told Adrian.
“Can somebody finally tell us what’s going on?” Rose cut in impatiently.
Adrian took a deep breath, bracing himself for the monumental story he was about to tell. Everyone else had gone very still and very silent, as though sensing the gravity of what was to come. “What I’m about to say is going to change everything you think,” Adrian said. He focused on Rose and Dimitri. “You two in particular are about to get your worlds rocked.”
Epilogue
“IS THAT THEM?” MY MOTHER CALLED. “I thought I heard the door.”
“It had better be,” I said, taking a pan out of the oven and carefully setting it on the counter. “This roast is at peak deliciousness. I’m not waiting for them to dive in. It would be a crime. A declaration of war against fine cuisine everywhere.”
My mother, used to my theatrics, smiled. “Sydney’s not here yet either.”
“Oh,” I said. “Well, I’ll wait for her.”
Eddie stuck his head in the kitchen, his face alight. “They’re here.”
I took off my oven mitts and apron and strolled out to the living room to see the guests who’d just come into the living room of our small rented house. I hadn’t seen Rose and Dimitri in almost a year and a half, right around the time Jill had been rescued from the Warriors in St. George. They looked the same as ever, gorgeous and formidable, as they stamped snow off their boots and gave us big smiles. Jill, who’d traveled with them, had already thrown herself into Eddie’s arms and was kissing him.
“Whoa, hey,” I said. “It hasn’t been that long since you saw each other. Control yourselves.”
It had actually been about a month since they’d been together, which I knew probably felt like an eternity to them. They’d been dating ever since her rescue from St. George, but she had had to go back to Court to finish her education while Eddie stayed with us. So their relationship had become a long-distance one over the last year, with her visiting us on breaks or him going to Court when he could get another guardian to stay with us.
Jill flushed pink and extracted herself from Eddie long enough to give me a hug. “I’ve missed you so much!” she said.
“I’ve missed you too,” I told her warmly. Every time I saw her, I was astonished to see how much she had transformed from an awkward girl into a poised princess of the Dragomir line. “But you’ve got to admit, I’ve been pretty good about updates. And I send you pictures every week.”
She grinned. “I know, I know. It’s just a little different not being with you like I used to.”
I planted a kiss on her forehead. “Better for both of us that way, Jailbait.”
I’d held good on my word to Sydney. I’d gone back on my meds, silencing both spirit and Aunt Tatiana. It had also quieted the bond between Jill and me. She still had a sense of me but no longer the intimate view into my heart and mind like she’d once had. Before I could say more to her, a plaintive wail made its way to us.
And that’s why I’m proposing that no one finds out he’s my son or Olive’s. From now on, let him be yours.
No one would question you two raising a dhampir. After all, your own children will be dhampirs, and from what I’ve seen, you two are smart enough to find a way to convince others he’s your biological child. I’ve also seen the way you two love each other, the way you support each other. Even with as challenging as your relationship has been, you’ve held true to yourselves and each other. That’s what Declan needs. That’s the kind of home Olive wanted for him, the kind I want for him.
I know it won’t be easy, and walking away from this is one of the hardest things I’ve had to do. If a day comes when I can feel convinced that it’s safe, beyond a doubt, for me to be in his life, then I will. You can use one of those magical methods of yours to find me, and I swear I’ll be there at his side in an instant. But until then, so long as the shadow of others’ fear and scrutiny hangs over him, I beg you to take him and give him the beautiful life I know you can give him.
Best,
Neil
Adrian’s hands were shaking as he finished reading the letter. Tears had formed in my eyes, and I was forced to blink them back. “He’s right,” I finally said. “We can find him with my magic. You don’t even need to use spirit.”
Adrian folded up the letter and took Declan from me. “But he’s also right about the risks.”
“What he’s asking is big . . .” I began. Neil was right that no one would question us having a dhampir child, but that didn’t mean the complications weren’t endless. Our own lives were already uncertain. I sank down on the couch, still holding Declan, my mind reeling.
When Adrian had first proposed to me, I’d been nervous, not for lack of love but because being a nineteen-year-old bride had never been in my plans. And being a nineteen-year-old mother? That was definitely not in my plans. But then, was anything turning out the way I’d expected? I studied Declan’s face, loving all the little perfect details but also fully aware that if I committed to him, any attempts at salvaging the future I’d wanted—a home with Adrian, college, normality—were going to be seriously thwarted. And yet, how could I abandon Declan?
I looked up at Adrian. “I don’t know what to do. I don’t have the answer.” I realized those weren’t words I uttered very often.
Adrian took a deep breath and glanced at those around us. “I think . . . I think maybe we need to ask for some help with this.”
I understood the suggestion and considered it. The fewer people who knew the truth about Declan, the better. But what was being asked of us was too big for us to shoulder alone. We needed allies we could trust in deciding Declan’s future, and glancing around at those gathered—Rose, Dimitri, Eddie, and Daniella—I realized these were the people we could count on. “Okay,” I told Adrian.
“Can somebody finally tell us what’s going on?” Rose cut in impatiently.
Adrian took a deep breath, bracing himself for the monumental story he was about to tell. Everyone else had gone very still and very silent, as though sensing the gravity of what was to come. “What I’m about to say is going to change everything you think,” Adrian said. He focused on Rose and Dimitri. “You two in particular are about to get your worlds rocked.”
Epilogue
“IS THAT THEM?” MY MOTHER CALLED. “I thought I heard the door.”
“It had better be,” I said, taking a pan out of the oven and carefully setting it on the counter. “This roast is at peak deliciousness. I’m not waiting for them to dive in. It would be a crime. A declaration of war against fine cuisine everywhere.”
My mother, used to my theatrics, smiled. “Sydney’s not here yet either.”
“Oh,” I said. “Well, I’ll wait for her.”
Eddie stuck his head in the kitchen, his face alight. “They’re here.”
I took off my oven mitts and apron and strolled out to the living room to see the guests who’d just come into the living room of our small rented house. I hadn’t seen Rose and Dimitri in almost a year and a half, right around the time Jill had been rescued from the Warriors in St. George. They looked the same as ever, gorgeous and formidable, as they stamped snow off their boots and gave us big smiles. Jill, who’d traveled with them, had already thrown herself into Eddie’s arms and was kissing him.
“Whoa, hey,” I said. “It hasn’t been that long since you saw each other. Control yourselves.”
It had actually been about a month since they’d been together, which I knew probably felt like an eternity to them. They’d been dating ever since her rescue from St. George, but she had had to go back to Court to finish her education while Eddie stayed with us. So their relationship had become a long-distance one over the last year, with her visiting us on breaks or him going to Court when he could get another guardian to stay with us.
Jill flushed pink and extracted herself from Eddie long enough to give me a hug. “I’ve missed you so much!” she said.
“I’ve missed you too,” I told her warmly. Every time I saw her, I was astonished to see how much she had transformed from an awkward girl into a poised princess of the Dragomir line. “But you’ve got to admit, I’ve been pretty good about updates. And I send you pictures every week.”
She grinned. “I know, I know. It’s just a little different not being with you like I used to.”
I planted a kiss on her forehead. “Better for both of us that way, Jailbait.”
I’d held good on my word to Sydney. I’d gone back on my meds, silencing both spirit and Aunt Tatiana. It had also quieted the bond between Jill and me. She still had a sense of me but no longer the intimate view into my heart and mind like she’d once had. Before I could say more to her, a plaintive wail made its way to us.
