The Unfailing Light

Chapter Eleven

I did not mean to test the empress's enchantment. The next afternoon, I was walking in the courtyard with the Bavarian princesses when they decided to race out to the cluster of birch trees by the front gates. The leaves had turned from deep green to blazing yellow and were beginning to fall to the ground. Augusta wanted to collect a few of the leaves to press inside her journal.
I had no idea the empress's spell did not stretch across the entire school campus. We reached the boundaries of the spell before we could have left the courtyard.
My body reacted violently. I was repelled backward, with bone-jarring vibrations racking my limbs. My ears were ringing. I fell to the ground, out of breath and feeling bruised and sore all over.
My friends turned around and stared at me in fright. They had passed through the invisible barrier without noticing a thing. There was nothing unnatural about the Bavarian princesses.
"Mon Dieu, Katerina!" Augusta hurried back to me and helped me to stand.
"I must have tripped over a stone or something," I said unsteadily. Every inch of my body throbbed. How powerful was the empress's magic? Could it actually kill me?
"Did you twist your ankle?" Erzsebet asked with concern.
"I just ... I think I need to go inside and lie down," I said. I was shaking with both fright and anger. I hated the idea of being trapped. Even if it was for my own protection.
"If you aren't feeling well by dinnertime, we'll be happy to sneak some food to you," Augusta said. "There will be mushroom soup tonight! And mutton pie!"
I thanked them, but by the time I reached our room, the effects of the spell were beginning to fade. I was still shaken and had a lingering headache, but I was otherwise unhurt. I really just needed a quiet, empty room in which to collect my thoughts, and I realized that my dormitory room, with Alix and Elena and Aurora all sniping at each other, would not be quiet enough.
I wandered the halls until I found myself in the library, which was nothing more than a drafty parlor with one small bookcase stacked with books. I'd read the hundred or so books over and over again in the years since I'd begun attending Smolny. It was not a large collection, but then, ladies of the aristocracy were not generally encouraged to read too much. Or to improve their minds. There were plenty of the classics here for Madame Tomilov to ensure we were exposed to fine literature, but that was enough for her.
I passed over the poems and stories of Alexander Pushkin, which I had read so often I could quote them by heart, and settled down in the chair with the tattered copy of Euripides's plays to reread Iphigenia in Tauris. I wondered if Madame Orbellani could find a copy of the play in its original Greek for me. I was anxious to practice my Greek and Latin once more. Especially after meeting Dr. Bokova. I'd always known the medical courses would be difficult, but I did not want to be remiss in any of my preparations. And since I had a year to wait, I decided I was going to make the most of it.
And steep in tears the mournful song,
Notes, which to the dead belong;
Dismal notes, attuned to woe,
By Pluto in the realms below.
I heard a whisper, or maybe it was just the exhalation of a breath behind me. The hairs stood up on the back of my neck. I jumped up out of my chair, and looked around the room. No one was there with me. And yet I could feel a presence. The person was very close. Too close. I shut the book and placed it back on the shelf, feeling compelled to leave.
Was it the empress's spell? Did she know that I had tested her magical barrier? I felt a horrible sense of guilt, but the presence did not feel like fae. It felt cold, like death. But ever since returning to Smolny, I could no longer see anyone's cold light.
The moment I stepped into the hallway, the strange feeling passed. I looked into the empty library again, almost curious enough to reenter the room, but I felt a strong resistance. There was something in that room that did not want me in there.
In all my years at the Smolny Institute, I had never encountered anything like this before. It was a presence, but did not seem like a person. It was cold, but gave off no cold light that I could see. My heart started to pound in my chest. I wondered if Konstantin had been able to get past the empress's spell somehow. What could I do?
As I hurried away down the hall, I felt a little bit foolish. There was no reason for the lich tsar to come looking for me here. And no reason for the empress's spell not to hold fast. Still, I was spooked, and did not want to be alone anymore. I decided to join the others for dinner.
I noticed Princess Alix limping slightly as she headed toward the dining hall. "Are you all right?" I asked.
"It's nothing," she said. "I'm fine. I was just taking a walk on the grounds. I think I overtired myself."
"I'd be happy to help-"
"I said I'm fine. Please forget it."
I took my seat next to Elena at the dinner table without another word to Alix.
Alix sat down across from us and began eating in silence. The Bavarian sisters joined us as well. Augusta dug into her food as Erzsebet leaned over toward Aurora.
"May I borrow your notes for the Domestic Arts examination?" she asked.
"Why must they test us after only one day of class?" Elena moaned.
Domestic Arts had been my least favorite class last year. Who knew there could be so much to learn about running a household? It seemed ridiculous to me to be examined on the most efficient way to manage servants or how to plan a menu.
"Of course you may." Aurora nodded haughtily to the Bavarian princess, her spoon poised over her mushroom soup. "I do not have many notes, however. My grandmother taught me everything I shall need to know."
Elena rolled her eyes. In a low voice, she whispered to me. "I hope her grandmother taught her how to survive a veshtiza's kiss. I am looking forward to the next full moon."
The gleeful malice in Elena's voice alarmed me. Even if she was a little snobbish, Princess Aurora had done nothing to Elena. "You mustn't," I whispered back. "You'll get into trouble."
"No one will ever know. Unless you tell them, Katiya."
I fretted. What would Elena do at the next full moon when she discovered she could not change? At least Aurora and Alix and the rest of the Smolny students would be safe from veshtiza poison.
That night, I had a chance to speak with Elena alone. "Must you change into a moth every month? What happens if you do not turn?"
Elena's eyes narrowed. "You know many of my family's secrets, but I will not tell you all of them. Not until you are one of us."
I sighed. "That will never happen. I will never marry your brother. Ever. And my family supports my decision." At least, my father did. Maman would have been delighted to see me as the crown princess of Montenegro. She had dreams of seeing one of her children sitting on a European throne one day.
"But you and Danilo are already bound. Your blood is a part of him now. You cannot ever break that bond." Elena smiled. "Don't you see?"
I could not fall asleep that night, and I laid awake for hours worrying about what she had said. The bond I had with the crown prince was indeed still there, just as it had been ever since the ritual in the Black Mountain temple. That was the night when the crown prince drank my blood. The night when the lich tsar was released by the Montenegrins.
At times, I could swear that I felt Danilo's mind reaching for mine. It was frightening, being connected in such an intimate way to someone so dangerous. To someone I loathed. I wondered if he could read my mind just as George could. I needed to find a way to be completely free of the crown prince. Only then would I be safe from the rest of the Montenegrins as well.